Heart Punch

The 2009 post

2009-09-03T20:44:00.003-05:00

None of us type into this here blog thing very often, do we? Are we too busy? Too lazy? Too stupid? I speak only for myself when I say ALL OF THE ABOVE! But hell, I think even I can manage one post a year and this is it! Actually, this is all shit that I've already posted elsewhere over the past year, but cut and paste is one of my many skills. I don't even remember watching some of this stuff, but yeah...here you go.

I finished the first disc of the '08 Champion's Carnival (covering the A Block). Lots of good stuff here, with a ton of stories woven through. You have Kojima's injured lariat arm, Kea busting his ass like crazy, but not being able to eke out a win, Tanahashi just generally being a douchebag (in the best way possible!) and Mutoh/Kawada bringing the veteran presence.

Favorite match so far was probably Mutoh/Tanahashi. Tanahashi dicks it up, eventually going to work on Mutoh's gimpy knees. Mutoh makes the comeback to show the young buck how to properly crack a kneecap and then they sprint to the finish. It wasn't a *great* match, but I was digging it all the way through. Kawada/Tanahashi was decent as well, but there were some dead spots that the Mutoh match didn't really have.

Kea is something of a revelation. I don't watch a ton of puro, so I'd only seen a few of his matches. He mentions being Triple Crown champion at one point. Is there anything from that era worth tracking down? Don't know if he was just picking it up for the big shows, but he was pretty great through all of this.

---

Went back to the DVDVR Memphis project today. After tomorrow, I'm taking off for an entire week, so my plan is to finish off as many of these discs as I can. Maybe even get my ballot in, if I'm lucky.

Anyway, from what I watched today, I'd say that the Lanny Poffo vs. Ron Garvin and the Garvin vs Savage cage match were the two standouts. Poffo is so much better than WWF job duty ever indicated. To the point that I'm wondering if anyone ever did a comp of his earlier work, because I want to see more. On the other hand, he does commentary on both of these matches and yeah...he should stay in the ring. He comes across as if he's half asleep, which isn't necessarily the vibe a sportscaster of any sort should be going for. At any rate, he busts out a moonsault, standing moonsault and pretty much a proto-swanton here, in a match that happened in 1982.

Savage/Garvin is just a fun little bloodbath. Garvin, of course, isn't afraid to kick the crap out of *anyone* and this is Savage in his absolute prime. Some great punches thrown here and the use of the cage actual augments the match instead of getting in the way. Loved the finish (Garvin crotches himself up top and Savage pulls him directly into a piledriver) as well.

I also watched all but the last few minutes of ECW's Heatwave '94 show, as I was starting to fall asleep. Decent show, but nothing that demands a second viewing. Main event w/ Douglas vs Sabu is probably the only thing you'd really want to track down. I actually dug the Chad Austin vs. Mikey Whipwreck match a bunch, too, but I'm probably the world's only Chad Austin fan and this had a bunch of awkward spots where he almost kills Mikey with various head droppy stuff. There's a brainbuster, in particular, that made me cringe.

--

Jerry Lawler vs Bill Dundee (Loser Leaves Town) from 6/6/83 is as perfect a wrestling match as I think I've ever seen. It feels absolutely EPIC, including all of the other wrestlers sitting around ringside just to watch. The crowd is absolutely molten hot and these two just put on a clinic. Amazing, amazing match. If it's not #1 on my Memphis ballot, I can't imagine what will knock it down.

(Note: This match did indeed take the top spot in my Memphis ballot. You want to see it. Trust me.)

--

Watched the Global Lt. Heavyweight title tournament. Most of it is shown only in short clips, which seems to be for the best. It's amazing how much wrestling has changed stylistically since that point, especially in terms of juniors. There was some awful looking stuff on display here. The Lynn/Waltman final is complete and almost as good as I remembered it. Kid looks like he's 10, but he hits all sorts of flippy stuff and is years ahead of his time. I had forgotten that Lynn used to do some high flying as well.

There's also a second show with Eddie Gilbert defending the TV belt versus Chaz. They have three fans frisk Gilbert for weapons beforehand and, of course, they all find something. Gilbert is hilarious here. Anyway, Chaz sucks, but Gilbert could work circles around pretty much anyone so this was fun. Just as a reminder of how stupid ESPN was (is?), this match ends with Gilbert fireballing Chaz, but it's off camera, because I guess it would encourage the kiddies to fireball siblings, teachers, nuns or the like.

--

I watched an ep of WCWSN last night (5/2/92), co-hosted by Jason Hervey. JR's utter contempt for him is just barely disguised, so the commentary in this is really fun. Main event features an Arn Anderson/Big Josh 2/3 falls match that goes about 35-40 minutes w/ commercials. Really good match. Matt Bourne should be remembered way more fondly. He was still pumping out good matches even into the Doink run.

--

Only one match into the B Block of this year's Champ's Carnival, but consider me an official entrant into the Church of Minoru Suzuki. How have I not seen every pro wrestling match that this guy has ever had?

What a tremendous dickhead. He wrestled Doering in the match I watched and he just smothers him, going from limb to limb and basically tries to rip off a body part and take it with him. And when he's not doing that, he's smacking Doering over and over again, then standing there, coldly laughing as Doering tries to pick himself up. The ref gets in his way at one point, so Suzuki casually flicks him to the mat and again, starts cackling about it. He chokes Doering out at one point, then stands back and admires his handiwork. Sweet christ, was it ever great.

Overall, it was a lackluster match because there was just too much of a style clash, but if nothing else, I couldn't look away from Suzuki. Can't wait to see the rest of his matches. I'm trying to wrap my head around sort of match that he and Nishimura will have, but I can't quite figure it out.

--

WCWSN - 5/9/92

Not much of note through most of the show. Co-host this week was one of the guys in the band Alabama. There was a fun interview segment with Rick Rude, where three separate women in the crowd claim to be having affairs with Rick Steamboat (who the Dangerous Alliance is accusing of stalking Medusa). One of them repeatedly calls the other a slut and JR isn't happy about that at all. Rude, however, can barely stop himself from cracking up. Main event is Austin vs. Windham, 2/3 falls (don't know if I mentioned it, but the gimmick of the shows at this point is that the main event every week is 2/3 falls). Not as good as the match these two had from the show a few weeks before, but still pretty awesome.

I also watched another disc of the Memphis set, mostly focused on Savage matches. Seriously, he wrestles like he was shot out of a cannon. I've always thought that early Muta was about the quickest wrestler I'd ever seen, but Savage is just all over the place and looks absolutely smooth and effortless with every single thing he does.

Tried to watch Doering/Nishimura last night, but it put me to sleep. I get why people like Nish (and I think if I were in the right mood I'd dig him as well), but he sure can be deliberate at times. Makes sense that he's so close with Dory Funk, because I've always felt the same about him, too.

--

Through mid-'86 in the Memphis set. The December '85 Dundee/Lawler loser leaves town match is just about perfect. Actually the entire angle is fantastic, as Dundee is like a man possessed. He's been great through the entire set, but during this timeframe, he turns it up like 5 notches. Quite possibly one of the best angles that I've ever seen. Here's pretty much how it plays out.

Much spoilerage follows, if you ever plan on watching any of this...

-Lawler/Dundee are teammates.

-Fabulous Ones cut a promo talking about how Dundee mentioned that they were better than the Fabs. They think it's fine that he brags about beating teams like the Road Warriors, but they'd never wrestled the Fabs and he didn't want fans to think that it was a sure bet just because Dundee said so. That brings out Dundee, who decides that they're going to have the match right there and then. Fabs pretty much demur because they feel that the good guys shouldn't be wrestling one another, but kicking some heel ass instead.

-Lawler comes out and agrees with them and pretty much tells Dundee to chill out. Dundee is just raring to go the entire time. Lawler points out that the Fabs are the tag champs and that he's the Southern champ. Dunbdee takes exception because he doesn't have a belt and can't get a title shot versus his "friends." He's starting to come off as a bit of a jerk in the process. Lawler is pissed and says that he doesn't want to team with Dundee anymore. Dundee goes berserk and attacks everyone in sight before running off.

-Later in the show, Dundee demands a match versus Lawler, putting up his $25,000 sports car to sweeten the pot. Lawler calls it a pile of junk and turns down the match. Dundee then puts up his hair and that's good enough for Lawler. So they have a great match and Dundee CHEATS TO WIN! Lawler wants a rematch, but Dundee tells him that he won't get one for 30 days, then spills the beans that Ric Flair is coming to town in 28 days and that Lawler won't be getting the NWA title shot...he will. And that when he beats Flair, he's not even going to wrestle Lawler then. He's going to *give* him the Southern title, because he won't be needing it at that point.

-Even later in the same show, Lawler comes out with a baseball bat and tells Dundee that he's got 10 seconds to give him the rematch, or his beloved car is going to be smashed to bits. Dundee finally agrees.

-Jump to the LLT match (which is almost two months later, so I can't wait to get to the extras disc that covers this feud in more detail to see what I missed), where somehow, Dundee and his wife's (!) hair are now on the line as well. One of Lawler's eyes is completely bandaged up from a previous attack, so everything he does in this match is just slightly mistimed because of it. Because people sold stuff like that once upon a time. The rest of the roster surrounds the ring in the front row, mush like they did in the first LLT match between these two.

-Lawler/Dundee proceed to brawl around the entire building and have one the greatest brawls that I've ever seen. The finish sees one of the heels at ringside (Tony Falk) slip Dundee something, which he then blasts Lawler in the eye with. 1-2-3! Lawler actually loses a LLT match! In the Mid-South Coliseum! Crowd is pretty much wetting itself and the babyfaces around ringside look like they're ready to cry. Just a phenomenal job by everyone here.

(Note: This was #3 on my Memphis ballot)

--

Finished the '08 Champs Carnival today. The Tanahashi/Suwama final was 12 flavors of awesome. Probably a top 10 match of the year for me, actually. It maybe got a bit nearfall heavy down the stretch and it was hurt by me knowing the result going in, but yeah...loads of drama and a lot of quality nearfalls over the last few minutes.

I was largely underwhelmed by the rest of the B block matches, but as I said in a previous post, Minoru Suzuki is so great that his matches made up for any other lackluster action. The match with Sasaki is king sized. Sasaki just beats the snot out of him with chops as MiSu stands there and laughs in his face for a bit before bitchslapping him. Who the fuck does that to Kensuke Sasaki, of all people? MiSu, that's who.

--

Got through the first night of the 2008 wXw 16 carat tourney. Quackenbush/Danielson have a good match (these two have yet to have the blowaway match you'd expect, though. It's always just slightly...off) and the Doug Williams/Marufuji match is worth tracking down as well. Everything else is pretty middling, though. I'm about halfway through Night 2 and again, there's nothing awful and the big name guys are pumping out quality matches, but I wouldn't go out of my way to call anything "must see."

--

Finished off night two of the '08 16 carat tourney. Quack/Saint is even better than the hype would indicate. I love that Quack just has the biggest grin on his face through the entire match, like even he can't believe the match is happening and then you have Hero totally marking out on commentary as well. At any rate, if you like Saint, you'll love this, as it's pretty much a primer on all of his goofy (and I mean that in the greatest way possible) reversals and limb work with Quack staying right beside him the entire time.It never occurred to me before seeing this match, but I've come to the conclusion that a Saint vs Skayde match would make the entire planet implode from too much awesome.

-Danielson vs Marufuji was pretty much what you'd expect. Good match, but if you've seen their ROH stuff (single match and tags) you wouldn't need to track it down.

-Then there's the Steve Douglas vs Alex Pain match. Pretty much every little thing I hate about modern indy wrestling (total overkill, lots of fighting spirit junk, a shit ton of nearfalls that you'd never buy as the finsh) combined into a package that...I absolutely loved. I don't even want to try to explain it, but this had me marking out nonstop. I think Hero and Bryce on commentary helped a lot and the crowd is pretty much rabid, so it felt like a really "big" match and all that crap didn't come off as being unnecessary.

-Also, for what little it's worth, I watched the best of '08 Impact deal and it's the first TNA show in weeks (maybe months) that didn't have me heavily leaning on the fast forward button. TNA airing wrestling? Oh, the humanity!

--

Fallout 3 has really cut into the amount of wrestling I've been watching since Christmas, but I am halfway through the third night of the '08 16 Carat tournament. The Hero/Danielson match is good. Not great, but definitely worth watching. Can't help but to think that they wrestled an unnecessarily long match just to do it, though.

Is there any sort of story behind the Chuck Taylor/Taiji Ishimori matches here? On Night two, they're on opposite sides of a six man tag. Ishimori gets pinned after an Awful Waffle and immediately pops up and gets in Taylor's face. On night three, they face each other one on one. Ishimori absolutely obliterates him with a DDT, looking like he legit shook Taylor up. The finish was definitely blown, as Bryce ends up hesitantly counting to three as Chucky T just lays there looking stunned. Ishimori proceeds to lay in a few shooty looking stomps and generally acts like a giant dick. Can't imagine what sort of heat these two would have. It's not like they're generally working in the same circles. I didn't see anything in the tag match that looked unprofessional on Taylor's part, either.

--

Finally finished the 16 Carat tourney.

-4 Team elimination match was just a crazy spotfest. It was also a mess, but not necessarily in a *bad* way. PCO nearly kills a fan, as he press slams Adam Polack over the top rope and directly onto some dude at ringside. Nutty. I'm starting to dig Big Van Walter. His stuff w/ PCO was pretty fun.

-Quack/Marufuji was really disappointing. They didn't seem to click at all. I might have been looking forward to this almost as much as Quack/Saint, but yeah...really lackluster.

-Steve Douglas vs Generico was more overkill than you can shake a stick at (there's a sequence where they trade half and half suplexes that's just ridiculous, though Chucky T trying to explain the concept of fighting spirit on commentary is pretty great), but again, it ended up being a fun little match. I thought the finish was pretty clever, as Generico hit his running Yakuza in the corner. His leg ended up draped over the top and he was playing to the crowd as Douglas collapsed. Douglas has just enough energy to suddenly lift him up and spike him with a Rubix Cube for the win. From what I've read, he refers to the move as Natürliche Auslese, which I believe translates to Natural Selection. That's a nifty name for a finisher, actually.

-Danielson vs Bad Bones in the finals was...decent. I think Bones will end up being really good in a few years, but there were stretches here that I wasn't into. Of course, it had more overkill and I was starting to burn out on head drop after head drop. When he stuck to working Danielson's injured leg and doing strike exchanges, I think it came off much better. Why has simplicity turned into such a dirty word in wrestling?

I also started Hardcore Heaven '94, which has one of the most blown finishes I've ever seen. It's the TV title match with Jason challenging against Mikey Whipwreck. Ref is bumped by an inadvertant Mikey chairshot. Mikey then nails Jason and covers him. He's looking around for a run in that someone apparently dropped the ball on. Ref counts 1-2-3...or did he? He actually just collapses into a heap at the third count. Much confusion reigns, as the crowd thinks the match is over. Pibulls (finally) run out and crotch Mikey on the post. Jason rolls him up and the ref magically revives in time for the three count. It's Philly, so the crowd shits all over this.

--

Started a Stan Hansen comp...

-Disc 1 opens with a cage match versus Sammartino (1976). This is clipped to shreds, but looked like it would have been a really hot brawl in it's entirety.

-Next up is a match against Inoki (2/8/80). The more early 80s New Japan I see, the more I like it. God, the crowds are molten. Just to show how over/feared the lariat was, the crowd oohs and ahhs every time Hansen whips Inoki into the ropes, regardless of the intent. Anyway, this is a great little brawl and Hansen just kills him with a Lariat at the end.

-You know who deserves more credit? Bob Backlund. He typically gets painted with the Howdy Doody, white meat babyface brush, but the guy could work an incredible brawl and was just freakishly strong. He essentially deadlifts Hansen with *one arm* in this match. Not the typical "Backlund lift" setup where the guy being picked up can help with the lift, either.

-Last match I watched before crashing was versus Andre (9/23/81). I rarely hear people mention this match. They should, because it's FANTASTIC. Andre is totally mobile here and bumps around like a freak. He's working heel in this match and just has some great timing feeding into Hansen's comebacks and what not. He also laughs maniacally after delivering moves, so what's not to love? You could almost say that this was worked as a sprint and Andre never slowed down at all. It originally ends up in a DCO, but Andre basically threatens to murder every man, woman and child in the building if it's not restarted. Hansen is okay with that, so we get a few more minutes of them beating the shit out of one another. Andre even loads up an elbow pad and murderizes the ref with a Lariat of his own, just to show Hansen how it's supposed to be done.

After the match, there's like 6-7 guys trying to hold Andre back and he casually flicks them off like they weren't even there. They continue to brawl and it resembles a Godzilla movie, as tiny Japanese dudes scramble to break up two crazy dudes intent on killing one another. If you haven't seen this...do so.

--

Through the first disc of the Hansen comp. None of this is less than exceptional. Hansen was such a beast. Every single thing he did looked like it hurt like hell. Only thing I couldn't get into was the Hansen/Brody vs Funks ('82 Tag League Finals) match. I've actually seen it before and it's a great match, but the copy I have on this disc doesn't have sound. Wrestling isn't the same without the crowd response. Or even the simple sound of guys taking bumps, for that matter.

This disc also has the best Baba match (9/3/83) I've ever seen. I typically can't stand to watch him work. Honestly, that has more to do with his spindly looking arms and his protruding ribcage than anything, but, uh...yeah. He actually works at a pretty decent clip here and Hansen isn't afraid to lay in some shots.

I also watched the ECW "Double Tables" show. Benoit/Snow holds up, though you have some bits in commentary and Benoit's postmatch promo that make it a bit awkward to watch in retrospect. There's also a Douglas match versus Tully Blanchard that you'll want to avoid. These two don't click at all. Also, Sandman/Cactus in the famous(ly awful) Texas Deathmatch, where Sandman gets a concussion moments in and seemingly forgets the match type and keeps getting up for no reason, causing Cactus to practically have to kill him to keep him down for a 10 count.

Main event is Public Enemy vs Sabu/Taz in the eponymous double tables match. PE is, quite frankly, so underrated that it isn't even funny. WCW killed their aura and turned them into kiddy fare, but in this time period, in this company, they were amazing. One of the best teams of the 90s, really. Sure, Johnny Grunge sucked, but he could dependably take a beating and bleed, which is all they ever asked of him. People forget how good Ted Petty was. I'm sure there's a newer generation of indy fan who don't know him at all outside of his name being attached to TPI, which is a shame. Amazing worker on an indy level years before things like that mattered. At any rate, this brawl is a blast to watch and definitely captures the "spirit" of ECW. This also has the famous spot where Benoit runs in postmatch and powerbombs Sabu off the top, through Rocco Rock who's laying on a table. We've kinda gone through an era where we've seen it all, but in '95, this was revolutionary. I remember thinking that Rocco was dead when I first saw it.

--

Ran through another episode of SMW. 2/15/92, to be exact. Featuring the debut of "Hollywood" Bob Holly. He's sporting long, flowing brown hair (he goes blonde for the Hardcore gimmick, but not a Hollywood gimmick? Crazy!) and is working a much more fast paced, athletic style than he would go onto in later years. Finishes the job guy with a kneedrop of the top that even Jim Cornette is comparing favorably to Bobby Eaton's. Of course, then he opened his mouth and the Alabama accent was decidedly un-Hollywood, but...yeah.

-Paul Orndorff also makes his debut (I guess pointing this out is redundant. It's the second show...pretty much *everyone* is debuting) against Rip Rogers. Fun match. Rogers is fantastic as always. No piledriver from Orndorff, as it's outlawed in SMW.

-Dutch Mantell/Scott Armstrong is there pretty much just to sell Bob Armstrong laying down the rules on episode one. Dutch uses the whip and gets fined $500.

-Main event is the Fantastics (Jackie Fulton version) versus Ivan and Vladimir Koloff. Not sure who Vlad is, but he's super green, to the point that Ivan is pretty much calling the entire match from the apron and telling him every single thing he should do. Good stuff, though, if you appreciate the southern tag formula match.

-Show closes with a truly bizarre Terry Gordy promo that makes me wonder how many different things he was on in '92. I wish I could youtube it (actually, I'm sure I could, but that's a bit more effort than I'm ready for tonight), because I'm sure you'd all get a kick out of it. Bob Caudle is left staring at him blankly, wondering what the hell just happened.

Interestingly, they're already starting to sell the debut of the Heavenly Bodies, even though they won't show up for a few more months. At any rate, these shows are great. SMW was probably the last "territory," so to speak, and it's always great to watch that sort of small show where the crowds are molten hot and it's more of a family atmosphere. That Cornette booked the sort of wrestling that I'm into doesn't hurt, either.

--

SMW (2/22/92).

-"Hollywood" Bob Holly vs Pat Rose opens the show. Now Holly has added a bit of a porn 'stache. It's not a good look for him. It must have thrown off the aerodynamics of the top rope knee as well, as he almost crushed Rose's sternum with it...

-Ivan Koloff introduces Jimmy Golden (AKA Bunkhouse Buck) as his new partner. Apparently, Vladimir was shipped back to Russia. Can't argue with this, as Golden is 12 kinds of awesome.

-Rip Rogers versus Joey Maggs isn't as good as I was hoping. Maggs is a guy who did job duty for Crockett for ages and was always perfect in that role. He was one of my favorite enhancement dudes over the years. Rip Rogers seems to have slipped through the cracks. I don't know that people who weren't watching back in the day have heard of him at all, which is a shame. At any rate, there was nothing awful hee, but Rogers seemed like he was off.

-Robert Gibson versus THE MIGHTY YANKEE! Ha. Gotta love southern wrestling. Not sure who Yankee was (Carl Styles, maybe?), but he was awful. Gibson's coming off of a knee injury that put him out for almost a year. To sum up, this was horrid.

-Tim Horner versus Barry Horowitz was fantastic. If Horowitz was like 6" taller or came into the business 10 years later when he could have wrestled as a junior, he'd have been a star. Just a tremendous worker in every promotion I've ever seen him in. Even in the early Jack Hart days he was always going to give you a much faster paced match than anyone on the show without compromising his ability to actually work a match.

-Brian Lee vs Dutch Mantell is the main event. Fun brawl. Finish was Dutch trying to use knucks (obtained by manager Ron Wright), but Lee steals them, drops lee and covers him. Ref counts two, sees the knucks and DQs Lee. At this point in time, that was more clever than cliche, so the crowd was ready to kill.

-One of the big angles of these early shows is that Ron Wright is looking for a guy to manage. Wright is great, as he's probably in his late 50s at this point and is in a wheelchair because he needs hip/knee replacements, but his medicare won't cover it. So he needs to find a guy that can make him cash so he can get his operations. You get this brokedown looking old guy heeling it up while the crowd is calling for his death. The heels are totally sympathetic to him all the while. It's a really neat little twist.

-There was a match with Brad Anderson (son of Gene). He spends the entire match *not* working the arm. Have you ever heard of Brad Anderson before now? Now you know why. Heh.

--

Decided to start watching TPI '08, just because a bunch of the matches are on the '08 MOTYC set and I wanted to see them in context. I finished night 1 in one sitting and it was off the charts. I understand that night 2 is supposed to be much better, so I'm already comfortable in placing this right under '04 as the best TPI ever.

-Having only seen one other full IWA show in '08, I'm not at all invested in the Strife/Dingo feud, but the opening angle really made me want to see the LLT match in the main of N1. And holy crap, did Dingo ever hit a gusher.

-Ego/Ali was a fun opener with both of them just busting out the ridiculous spots to get the already hot crowd even more into the show.

-Smothers/ Taylor was nothing special, but did it's job to get Taylor over. Smothers had the working shoes on, as we got no shtick at all from him.

-Bobby Fish is way better than he was the last time I saw him. Scorpio is one of the best workers on the indy scene period right now, so this was 12 kinds of awesome.

-Death Rey vs. Trik was basically there to start setting up the Trik/Hero match on night two. Nothing wrong with this, but definitely one of the weaker matches of the night.

-Drake vs 2 Tough Tony? Eh. It's always fun to watch a guy like Tony who doesn't usually work a straight wrestling match do just that, but there was never any douby that Drake was going to win and that took away from the match a bit.

-Umm...Cassandro has a death wish. He took two bumps in this match that were absolutely, cringe inducingly ridiculous. Then he nearly killed Chucky T on the finish, dropping him collarbone first. Nasty stuff. Anyway, this was full of shtick and all of it was awesome.

-Sami versus Hero was typical, "Hero murders the young guy" match that Hero's been working in IWA for years. If you're a stiffness mark, you'll adore this. The postmatch stuff with Hero/Trik didn't work as well, though, if only because they just picked up an angle that hadn't been touched on at all in like 2 years. Sure, I want to see Hero kill the crap out of Trik, but it's not because the angle was well built. Heh.

-Necro/King is a top shelf brawl. These two never have a bad match. Kingston looks legitimately touched at his reaction, so no thoughts of a beautiful death tonight...

-This is possibly the worst match Josh Abercrombie/Raymond and Tyler Black ever had. It's a shame, as Raymond was one of my favorites a few years ago and he's seemingly fallen off the map in the interim.

-Ace/Ares just flat out sucked. I don't get the love that Ares seems to have. There's definitely a reason that Claudio became the bigger star. Ares is just sorta there through all of this. Hey...if he doesn't care, either do I.

-Can't stand Michael Elgin or Ricochet, but I can give credit where it's do. Great match, with both guys working really well from the big vs little template. Elgin probably bumps around for him a little too much, but yeah...it's hard to complain too much about that.

-The Claudio/Jacobs match would have worked better in front of an ROH audience, but it was still pretty decent overall. Jacobs is amazing at just about everything he does, but working a more technical match seems to be his weakness at this point.

-Dingo/Strife is a fun, heated brawl. Not *great* by any means, but you have two guys working a brawl based on emotion and hate. It didn't feel like they were going through the motions, so to speak. The blood helped sell the match that much more and Dingo is really great at timing the comebacks. I definitely need to see more of him.

-Not sure if he's the regular announcer now, but I really liked Mike Z. I never dug Ben Jordan that much, because he was easier to derail from calling a match than even Prazak was. The commentary got way too in-jokey and just flat out dumb at times. Mike Z seems to know his stuff pretty well, lets the color guys add color without stepping over their stories (I love Smothers blowing move names and Mike Z just sitting there saying that he's the one paid to be the wrestling dork and that Smothers can just call stuff whatever he wants to) and actually sells the angles, no matter how silly.

--

Almost through TPI, as I'm getting ready to watch the Trik/Hero match. Night 2 is indeed a whole lot better than night 1. I'm sold on Sara Del Ray's awesomeness, which isn't something I would have said going into this show. I guess watching her have to wrestle down to a lesser opponent doesn't showcase what she can do (which jives perfectly with the underwhelming Trik Davis match in rd 1, actually). But put her in there with someone who can actually go and it turns out that she's fantastic.

I didn't hear the goofy 6 man match getting much love, but if you enjoy comedy wrestling, this is pretty choice as well. Made all the better by Kingston/Taylor on commentary with Mike Z.

--

I started into the MOTYC '08 set.

Takashi Sasaki & Yuko Miyamoto vs. Daisuke Sekimoto & Yoshihito Sasaki (Big Japan 1/2/08)

I dug this a lot, even if it took me half the match to figure out who was who (Sekimoto is the only one I've seen more than a few matches of). Lots of overkill here, but you can get away with that in a tag match, since you always have another guy to break up a pin instead of kicking out of 27 ridiculous headdrops in a row all on your own. Sasaki/Miyamoto, in particular were pretty fabulous. Sekimoto was actually fairly understated, as you'd think this would be the sort of match that would let him indulge all of his worst tendencies. Instead, he actually sells some stuff and doesn't overtly try to murder anyone. Heh.

Bryan Danielson vs. Low-Ki (PWG 1/5/08)

I wrote about this one already, even if it's long since purged. To sum up, I love the matwork here. All kinds of nasty little stuff like Danielson trying to rip Ki's ear off. It came across as two guys fighting for position, instead of being locked into a generic sequence that we've seen a hundred times before.

Teddy Hart vs. Eddie Kingston vs. Homicide (JAPW 1/19)

I seriously think that the only joy that Homicide gets out of life is to cause Teddy Hart as much pain as he possibly can. Both he and King just kill the crap out of Teddy. Stiff strikes, tons of chairs thrown awkwardly and dangerously in his general direction. Teddy takes his beating like a man, though, and manages to pop off a few moonsaults off of stuff. Because that's what he does, you know? I wouldn't call this a MOTYC at all, but it sure as hell was fun. King kinda comes off looking weak (even scared) in parts of this, but I have no idea what the angle going in between he and 'Cide is, so, uh...yeah.

Bryan Danielson vs. Tyler Black (ROH 1/25/08)

I liked this a whole bunch. I guess this was Black's big breakout match, hence the name of the show? He maybe overdoes the cocky little punk act a bit, but it actually works into the match, as his total disrespect throughout the match throws Dragon off his game a bit. I guess my big complaint (if it's really a complaint at all) is that Black works this match way too much as a face when he's not dicking it up. Lots of spots built around his determination and the spunky "refuse to lose" attitude. I, of course, am much more of a "traditional" fan, so I want to see heels show ass, backpedal and generally just act like chickenshit douchebags. I can certainly appreciate the match, it's just not necessarily what I'm personally into.

--

Finished the first disc of the '08 set. I was kinda dreading the long NOAH 6-man at the end of the disc (Kobashi/Honda/Taniguchi vs. Morishima/Marufuji/Suguira from 2/21), but I ended up enjoying it quite a bit. They seemed to want to build Kobashi versus Morishima, but I was left wanting to see Kobashi/Marufuji a whole lot more. He doesn't show it as much in his work in the States, but Maru is such a great young punk. I was getting a similar vibe as I got from Kanemoto/Ohtani in the early 90s. He has utter disdain for his opponents and wants to not only make them lose, but look like complete idiots in the process. I don't think the concept of respect even pops into his head for a second in this match.

I also watched the second disc (and half of the 3rd) in the Edge set. I think they go into overdrive with the opportunist stuff at times but otherwise, he's one of the best heels in the last decade and I enjoy literally every single match he's involved in. The part I watched was his transformation into the "Rated R Superstar" and there was just one really fun brawl after another. There's an absolutely fantastic match versus Orton from Raw that I don't remember at all. Both guys playing "can you top this" just in their heel shtick alone.

--

Went through both "Tragedy & Triumph" and "All the Glitters" on the CHIKARA front (and started Vanity & Violence). The Quack/Shane Storm matches were all sorts of awesome, as you don't normally get to see Quack work an all out brawl where he's only out to whip some dude's ass. All sorts of other fun stuff as well, but nothing that I'd particularly recommend to someone who wasn't already going to check out most, if not all, CHIKARA shows.

Also watched the first Nitro from '97. I picked up the entire year ages ago, but never made it a priority to watch them, as I'd already seen them all. There's a nifty Rey/Psicosis match and maybe the best match Duggan had in WCW (versus Regal) and, uh...a whole lot of nWo junk. Also a really awkward, in retrospect, promo with Kevin Sullivan. Benoit & Woman no showed Nitro that night and Sullivan is wondering where they are.

I'm just about through May in the WCWSN '92 season. I'd seen all of these as well, but this is my favorite show in my favorite promotions best year ever, so I have been watching these as much as possible. Short show this week (the Braves are still my least favorite non-Phillies team in baseball because of this), but there's a Zbyszko/Anderson vs Steamboat/Koloff match that's pretty great. I'm up to the main event, which is Scotty Flamingo vs Johnny B Badd 2/3 falls. Scotty cuts a wacky promo beforehand and I'm forever confused at how he so seamlessly transitioned into the Raven character from...this.

--

Got the 3 disc Legends of Wrestling set with the roundtable discussions from 24/7. Watched the Lawler/JYD episode and the Flair segment on the second disc. These are pretty outstanding. Michael Hayes and Dusty Rhodes just hold court with all sorts of funny stories. Pat Patterson is a bit too humble about his creative role, but he'll get a few good lines in as well. Mike Graham is useless, but he seems to know that as much as anyone, so he largely shuts up and lets everyone else talk. His best lines so far have all been self deprecating. Like Hayes asking him if he'd buy a ticket for a one hour draw with Graham/Race or Graham/Flair and Graham pointing out that no one *ever* bought a ticket to see him. JR is decent in the moderator role, but I'd prefer him on the panel proper, as I'm sure he has as many great stories to tell as anyone.

Loveed the Bob Backlund/Sgt Slaughter TX Death Match from the Slaughter section of the Legends set. Absolutely fantastic in every single way possible. People sleep on both of these guys so much. Slaughter is maybe the best bumping big man out there and absolutely proves that you can sell for a smaller guy without losing an ounce of credibility. Backlund tends to get labeled as a vanilla "technical" guy, but he worked a number of amazing, high level brawls. Not as good as Slaughter's Alley Fight w/ Pat Patterson or the Boot Camp match with Iron Sheik from the same general time period, but still a match that I wouldn't hesitate to say that people should track down...

--

Watching a load of World Class from early '83. This is right after the big Freebirds heel turn, so a lot of this is aimed really specifically at their feud. And christ, is it ever amazing. Terry Gordy is an absolute beast, with Hayes/Roberts providing the chickenshit heel dynamic to the group. I'm really gaining a new appreciation for Kevin Von Erich. He's a lot better worker than he was ever given credit for. Hell, he might even be better than David, though he would never have gotten the push that David was in line for (or Kerry got) simply because of size. Lots of proto-light heavyweight spots, but he also had great strikes and could hold up his end of a brawl.

Lots of King Kong Bundy on the stuff I'm watching as well. He was a bit smaller at this point and could get around the ring pretty quickly. I'm a sucker for a talented big man who's willing to bump and sell for smaller guys, so his matches with Kevin are all great fun.

I also finished the "Heatseekers" episode of the Legends of Wrestling set. I like the Lawler/Hayes/Foley/Bischoff panel a lot more overall, though Dusty is sorely missed. I continue to be astonished, for whatever reason, at how cool Bischoff always comes across in interviews and stuff like this. He may be the only guy in the business who's actually at peace with the way that the end of WCW shook out. Oddly enough, I don't remember any of the matches on the disc other than the Freebirds debuting in MSG, so I'll assume that there's nothing else worth mentioning. Heh.

--

Still going through the Best of '08 set. Random-ish thoughts shall follow from what I recall over the past disc and a half or so...

-Kasai/Numazawa vs Sasaki/Miyamoto (6/23) was so much fun to watch. I hadn't watched a straight up deathmatch in quite a while and, while I'll never consider myself a fan of the style, they can definitely be fun in small doses. Nice to see that Kasai is still a total loon. Dude has the biggest death wish in the entire business.

-Hero/Tornado cage match was simultaneously one of the best matches I've seen from '08 and also one of the worst. Horribly overbooked at times and the overkill got pretty silly, but damn...what a match. Tons of drama, palpable hate, leg work that actually meant something. I think the positives outweigh the negatives overall, but I can also see sitting down to watch this in six months and hating it that time around. It's a match that I'll have to be in a specific mood to actually dig.

-The big six man elimination match from BattlArts was...underwhelming. I'm not sure why I didn't like it, but I didn't. Actually, I fell asleep the first time I sat down to watch it. That might be part of the issue, as I've been more exhausted than usual as of late. I'll definitely watch it again at some point, but yeah...didn't like this at all.

-Liked the first Bam Bam vs Pequeno Damien 666 match a lot. It has me pumped to see the hair vs hair match that closes out disc 6. Lots of really quick action, which hasn't been a part of most of the lucha I've watched lately, which has been more of the slower "traditional" style match ups.

--

Watched the first disc of CHIKARA's Vanity & Violence last night. Really solid show so far. Nothing that really stands out as much watch, but I've generally enjoyed most everything on the show so far. Best match on disc one is probably F.I.S.T vs Super Smash Bros. Don't think I'll ever be a fan of Uno, but Stup just keeps getting better and better. I did hate the fatality bit at the end, though. I've always been all in when it comes to CHIKARA's brand of goofy, but this just came off as stupid to me.

Drake/Vin is decent but the finish, no matter how much it made sense and tied into the angle, was awful. My mind still boggles at the thought of me ever liking Equinox, but yeah...good stuff here.

Oh, I finished 'Mania as well. I should have seen 'Taker/HBK sooner. It's my favorite match of the year so far and I think I've watched it 2-3 times since I went through it the first time. I wish every pro wrestler had the ability to evoke the emotion that this match does. There aren't a whole lot of wrestlers out there right now that actually make me care, so when you come across a match like this it's just that much better because of it.

--

CHIKARA's "The Artistic Pursuit..." (the midwest debut) show last night. The lucha tag was just brutally bad, but from that point on, the show was fantastic. The Vin Gerard/Fire Ant match just blew me away. I wasn't expecting it to be quite that good. I'm still having trouble wrapping my head around the fact that Vin was once Equinox. Talk about improvement.

The Increibles match was just one of those really fun, goofy sprints that CHIKARA busts out from time to time. Seemed like the partners mixed it up a bit more than in past Increibles matches as well, so that added an interesting dynamic.

I should also mention that Mantis was absolutely on fire in commentary as well. He was just spitting out killer line after killer line every time he opened his mouth.

--

CHIKARA - Cibernetico Begins.

Really fun show. Probably the best Cibernetico show overall, though the last two Cibernetico matches were probably a tad better than this one.

-Super Smash Bros vs 2.0 was shockingly good. Not a fan of either team, but this was really fun. Actually, I guess I'm not a fan of Uno. Stupified/Dos is pretty great

-Brodie Lee vs Hallowicked was fantastic. Not the typical match you get from CHIKARA, as these two just beat the crap out of one another. It would have been considered a good brawl anywhere, but in CHIKARA, it's probably top five.

-Claudio versus the Fab Two wasn't great, but they told a nice story and I like how they're setting up the Claudio/Sweeney team.

-King was awesome in the Cibernetico, generally stirring up his team and being a disingenuous douchebag. Also, he killed both Fire Ant and Lince DEAD with two of the more brutal backfists he's ever thrown. My only real gripe with the match is that, whenever he was in the ring or next in the lineup, Lince would act all hesitant about being on the rudo team, but because he was visible on the hard cam, you sepnt the entire match watching him casually chatting and yukking it up with the other rudos when he was lower in the batting order. The old school fan in me cringed at that. Otherwise, this was really well booked and had a ton of action.

--

Just watched the Super Crazy/Ultimo Dragon/Great Sasuke match from the Nosawa Bom-Ba-Ye show in July. I assume this is what sets up the Ultimo/Sasuke mask match, because we get all sorts of unmasking antics. Match is okay I guess, but I wouldn't go out of my way to see it. Super Crazy is mostly just in the way of the shtick with the other two, but to his credit, he takes a pair of ridiculous bumps to the floor to provide the athleticism of the match.

On the "Best of '08" set, I also watched the Ibushi/KENTA vs. Nakajima/Marufuji from the ROH Tokyo Summit show. Wouldn't call it a MOTYC myself, but it was perfectly fine professional wrestling. I guess my problem is that it was just worked as a complete exhibition and there was no reason to care about any of it. I have no problem watching a fun sprint for what it is, but that's not really my personal idea of "good" wrestling.

--

Rey Misterio Jr vs Juventud Guerrera - cage match (1/31/96)

This was amazing. All sorts of hate filled, mask ripping fun. People forget that before The Juice got, err...juicy, that he was an absolute top level talent. He and Rey mesh so well together and this just brings the goods from start to finish. They do some stuff that was state of the art in '96 and the build to the finish will have you holding your breath just to see if one of them can manage *not* to die. There's even a homage to the ECW "chairshot heard 'round the world" spot just to show you how far reaching ECW's impact was in this time period, for those of you who like to understate ECW's place in the grand scheme of 90's wrestling.

Hybrid Dolphins vs Young Bucks (DDT4 Finals)

God, this was really fun as well. Possibly my favorite Danielson match ever, actually. He channels Regal in this match to an absurd degree and just beats Matt Jackson down. Strong kills him a bunch as well and it's all just glorious. I didn't buy into the finish at all, though, and couldn't understand why the heels were wrestling for a hot tag (seriously, are the Bucks so set in their ways that they can't adjust to a crowd that so obviously wants to hate them?), but every second that Danielson was killin' fools was worth watching.

The Mistico/TMIV match from 8/15? You can skip it. Tiger Mask is just dull and these two don't mesh well at all. No one really sells (except for the inexplicable part where they both sell exhaustion as if they've been working 45 minutes...after like 5). I guess you want to watch it for historical value, but yeah...not really worth seeing otherwise. At least it's fairly short.

Chris Hero vs Low Ki (BoLA 2008 - Finals)

Absolutely fantastic match. I'm a sucker for pro wrestling being presented as a battle of will if it's done correctly, and this was pretty much spot on. Both guys sold like crazy (of course, they really were beating the shit out of one another, so they didn't have much choice). Probably Ki's last big indy match at this point and it's a nice coda to that stage of his career. Pretty brutal, but it's not brutal just for the sake of doing it.

--

I continue watching random downloads...

Started with the KKK deathmatch thing from BJW with Jun Kasai and Abdullah Kobayashi. The kenzan/chairshot spot made me look away from the monitor. Disgusting. I get that some people love this sort of thing, but yeah...it's never been for me. I'll occasionally be in the mood to watch something like this, but I'm reminded quickly why it'll never be a regular thing. There's is a nice visual with Kasai walking the barbed wire strung ropes...in his barefeet.

G1 2009 Finals: Makabe vs Nakamura

I wasn't blown away by this. Of course, it was also the first G1 match I watched this year, so if there was any context to the match, I didn't get it. There's nothing really wrong with it, I guess. Nakamura acts like a total dick and Makabe works nicely as a fiery underdog babyface (though I thought he was a heel?). I guess I'll go back through the rest of the tournament eventually. Of course, I've had all of last year's on DVD for almost a year and I'm now a grand total of one match into the first night. Heh.

MIKAMI vs Great Sasuke (M-Pro 3/2/03)

Sasuke truly has a deathwish. He does things in this match that he doesn't need to and that most people in his position wouldn't even think of. Some really scary looking bumps by both guys here and there's a sequence involving a ladder that will make you cringe. MIKAMI, in particular, brings the hate and makes it worth a look.

Steen/Generico vs American Wolves (Tables are Legal - 5/30/09 HDNet show)

Fun match, but if this is really one of the best ROH matches of the year, then I'm not missing much. Some big bumps, but there's not much going on between them. Edwards doesn't seem all that good and yeah, Davey...we get it. You're REALLY, REALLY INTENSE. Now stop yelling like a moron. You don't look like a badass. You actually appear to be constipated.

I'm starting to think that Generico might just be the most underrated guy out there. He looks like an absolute star in everything, but doesn't get nearly the hype that he should. Other than King, I'm not sure that there's anyone I enjoy seeing more on the indy scene, as he can work with literally anyone and have a good match.

Hayato Jr Fujita vs Yoshitsune match (Michinoku Pro 12/12/08).

You definitely want to see this. Been watching a lot of Sugi recently since he's on AAA every week, but he's like 1000x better here. He absolutely mauls Hayato's sternum with his flippy stuff, to the point that I'm honestly surprised that he was able to get through the match. Just some brutal stuff, including a double stomp off a balcony that makes you wonder which guy is more insane. Hayato was more strike based and he certainly wasn't afraid to bring the pain, either. Can't say it's the best match I saw from '08, but it's top 10 material without a doubt.

--

I grabbed the entire DDT show from 8/23, just because I'd only ever seen individual matches here and there and I wanted to see at least one show in it's entirety. Some great, bizarre fun so far. I just wrapped up the Takagi/Randy "The Ram" Sasuke match. It's amazing how Sasuke can go from comedy to the goofy, self destructive spots at the snap of a finger. He seems to be gunning for a third skull fracture. The postmatch stuff was confusing (much like when I watch lucha, I really wish I spoke the language), but Dino, err...violating that other dude through the entire thing brought the funny.

Haven't watched the second half yet, but I'm hoping it will be as zany as the first...

QnD Reviews #5

2008-10-07T23:14:00.003-05:00

More random musings from yours truly. This time I might even edit them a bit so they make a bit more sense and don't read like message board posts (which, of course, they are)...

-I'm working through a disc of World Class from '82 that's boring me to tears, quite frankly. It's mostly focused on Bugsy McGraw, who I've never seen in a good match. His matches at this point are mostly just shtick because he'd been around for like 20 years and he's also working a gimmick where he just does random, goofy stuff for no apparent reason. The kids LOVED him, though. Getting ready to watch a match with King Kong Bundy and Harley Race.

-David Von Erich was truly fantastic and would have only gotten better, since he seemed to be the one who not only wanted to wrestle the most, but the one that was willing to branch out from Texas and learn from people outside of his family. Every single match I've seen him in, from squash to main event, has made him look like every bit the star he was pushed as.

-Not sure how many people the Sportatorium held (wiki says 4000), but the heat produced by the crowd was just insane. It must have been deafening to be there live.

-They were crazy over, but the Freebirds as the happy go lucky babyface duo (no Buddy Roberts because, really, who could like him? He comes across as the biggest douchebag lush you'd never want to meet.) just doesn't compute. I'm glad that I've reached the point to where they were the biggest heels in Texas and concerned themselves with nothing but women, booze and crippling anyone named Von Erich.

-Checkmate is amazing. He doesn't get featured a lot on what I'm watching, but he's a European guy who just works circles around everyone. I (and most others, apparently) always thought this was Les Thornton, but apparently it's a guy named Tony Charles under the mask. At any rate, if he were working today, people would be going bonkers over him.

-They hype a match between Brody and Bam Bam Bigelow, which isn't shown. There's one of those dream matches that I never thought of until that point.

-Lots more Brody/Abby stuff on the discs I'm watching. Fun brawls, but they really run together at this point. There is a spot I loved, though, where the idiot ref gets into Abby's face to make him break a choke. Abby looks at him, casually pulls a fork from his tights and stabs him right in the face. He never even changed expression. It was tremendous.

-Another day, a few more hours worth of WCCW in the bag. We've inexplicably jumped ahead to '88 and yeah...I really wish we'd get back to '83 already, because there's a whole bunch of crap here. I did mark out for a completely random Masa Chono run in, but that was one of the highlights of what I watched over the past few days. He's rail thin and looks to be all of 20 years old. If even.

-There are some fun matches between Chris Adams and Terry Taylor, but they'd already run this exact feud for Bill Watts, so I'm sure they'd worked each other hundreds of times by this point. This is where the Chono interference comes in as well, as he's one of Taylor's stooges.

-The other big angles of this time period flow together, as you have the Freebirds breaking up and KVE feuding with Iceman Parsons for the world title. Steve Simpson gets blinded by Freebird hair cream (an angle that needs to make a comeback pronto) and that leads to Terry Gordy being the greatest ass kicking tweener ever. He hates all of the heels and he hates all of the faces, but he feels responsible for Simpson being blinded, so he decides to team with Shaun Simpson and go after Tatum/Victory.

-I also watched the first disc in Goodhelmet's Dick Murdoch comp. I don't know that I've ever watched this much wrestling from the 70s in one sitting and it was pretty phenomenal. Other than being a flippy dude, I don't think there's one style of wrestling that Dick Murdoch wouldn't have been the best in the world at if he wanted to be. What a great stooging ass of a heel who would turn around and throw the greatest worked punches I've ever seen. He had great timing with comedy spots as well, which is something you didn't see a ton of in those days. It really made him stand out as something different.

-Going back and forth between Goodhelmet's Murdoch and Windham comps at the moment. Mostly Windham at the moment. I'm entirely through his original NWA run. While he wasn't quite as amazing in the ring as he was the 18 months prior, his first run with the Horsemen is my favorite section of his career. He was pretty much born to be a Horseman. He just fit in so perfectly. It's funny...I've seen (and already own) almost every match on this set, but I'm happily watching it all again because he's just so goo. In my mind, Windham at his best is what every pro wrestler should aspire to be. As we move on, there's only one match from his Widowmaker run (vs. Tito Santana) and a match versus Jumbo in All Japan, then we're into the WCW era with his second go as a Horseman and tagging with Dustin Rhodes. You just can't go wrong with this set.

As far as Murdoch goes, I've reached the 80s and his first run through Mid South. That people don't sing his praises on a daily basis is almost criminal. There's some fun matches versus Pat O'Connor and maybe the best Kevin Von Erich matches I've ever seen. It wasn't usually the case with Kerry, but I'm starting to think that the other Von Erichs were at their best when they *weren't* wrestling in Texas. This makes me want to pick up all of the St Louis stuff that's ever been released as well, as I'd only seen individual matches before this. Here, you get some interview segments and see some angles play out and it seems like Sam Muchnick was every bit the promoter that he was always been hyped to be.

-Watched the first disc of the Mr. Perfect set. The doc wasn't up to their typically amazing standards, but it's still worth a watch if you're a fan. Even if it's just for the behind the scenes look at his vignettes. Joe Hennig kinda looks like Matt Morgan. No idea how big he is, but I can see him riding the family name to a great deal of success. If he's actually talented, well then all the better...

-I watched all of the Lawler/Kaufman stuff on the Memphis set (as in the DVDVR Best of the 80's Memphis set) as well. 90 minutes of some of the best worked shoot stuff that you'll ever see. I'm blown away more and more every time I see it. I need to find out if "I'm From Hollywood" ever got a DVD release. Comedy Central used to show it from time to time, but I haven't seen it in ages. You couple that movie with the footage I watched and I don't think you could get a more comprehensive look at the feud if you tried.

-Finished off the Windham set. Can't stress enough as to how worth it this set is. Some amazing matches/angles. I had forgotten just how great the team and eventual split with BW/Dustin was.

-Watched the second disc of the Hennig set. First time I saw the broadway match w/ Bock since it originally aired. Just a remarkable match. Both in the ring, where it went back and forth at a great pace the entire time and even on commentary, where they really managed to put it over as something special.

-Rodman Down Under. This wasn't very good, though I wasn't expecting it to be. Any entertainment it offered was usually for all the wrong reasons. I'm still trying to figure out why the commentators buried Johnny Grunge, basically cracking fat jokes about him throughout the entire match. Funnier yet is that Road Warrior Animal actually looked fatter, but they claimed he was in great shape. At any rate, I got it at Wal-Mart for a buck, so at least I got my money's worth. Heh.

-Raven/Sullivan shoot. Lots of fun stories and it would certainly be educational in terms of building a gimmick, but Raven talks too much and doesn't let Sulli get his stories out.

-Ian Rotten Roast. A lot of inside jokes that you'd have to be a big IWA fan to get. King is pretty funny, though, and this footage would be a decent example to site if you find yourself in the "is Mickie Knuckles attractive?" argument, as she cleans up pretty nicely.

-Finally, went back to the Murdoch set. I really want to finish this before I dive into the Memphis set. Last disc I watched was focused around Adonis/Murdoch versus the Samoans and versus Inoki/Fujinami in New Japan. I've not seen much early 80's NJPW, so I was astonished at how popular Inoki was. Anyone who thinks that Japanese crowds sit on their hands should watch some of these matches, because it would be hard to find a crowd any louder for such a prolonged period.

-Down to the last 2-3 matches in the Murdoch set. Much like the Windham set, I don't think I could give it a higher recommendation. I went in being familiar with Murdoch and knowing that he was awesome, but not really familiar with a lot of his best work. I'm coming out of it convinced that he's one of the best workers who ever laced up a pair of boots. The guy was a machine in the ring. He could tear it up on the mat if that's what the match called for, but the old standard of punching dudes in the face worked just as well. That he was a great talker and had some of the best facial expressions in the business was just icing on the cake.

CHIKARA - Grit & Glory - Disc One

This kinda blew my mind, as it was the first show (other than the current WWE/TNA shows) I've watched in about a month and a half that occurred since '99. Made it come off a bit sloppier than I'd normally notice, but it made all of the lucha stuff look state of the art as well.

-We open with a great Haze/Chucky T promo, as Daizee rambles on about beating Death Rey 5 times in one second and Taylor cracks me up with a line about KoT, saying that the entire crowd must have been Bobby Dempsey's parents that night, because no one loved him. Heh.

-The mixed tag itself was pretty bad, but I loved the bit where the women wrestled straight up, but when Chuck Taylor tagged in, he proceeded to engage in a catfight with Dempsey, with the ladies having to pull them apart. Oh, CHIKARA, how I've missed thee.

-ONST/Super Smash Bros. was pretty fun. Lots of innovative stuff from the SSB, though this match was largely built around Donst being heelish and Hydra being ignored by Mantis.

-This is pretty much the year of Vin Gerard. How ridiculous is that thought? Yet it's all been awesome and it turns out that he doesn't totally suck after all! He picks apart Lince's knee in this match. Lince even remembers to sell it, except for all of those times when he's springing to the top doing wacky lucha stuff. *sigh*

-Six man w/ Quack/Skayde/Turbo vs Claudio/Pantera/Dutt was friggin' amazing. One of my favorite matches this year, actually. Really fluid tandem stuff from the rudos and just some ridiculous spots all around. My first thought was that one of those names wasn't like the others, but even Sonjay stepped it up here.

-King/Storm II wasn't as good as the first, but I'm predisposed to like matches featuring Kingston pummeling masked dudes in the face, so this was still pretty great for me. You also get the requisite chilling promo from King before the match as well. Really, though, getting to watch Shane Storm's nose gush blood should make this a keeper for everyone. Heh.

-Fab 3 versus Colony was nothing special. Pretty standard CHIKARA trios action. Postmatch, Fab 3 continue their split. Great, great, great bit with Sweeney suggesting that they "hug it out," at which point Shayne Hawke leaps into Mitch Ryder's arms and practically starts dry humping him. Tremendous.

-I'm all caught up with the CHIKARA shows that I own currently. Time to put an order together, I guess. At any rate, you want both Anniversario shows from this year. Both of them are *fantastic*. I'd go as far as to say that they're two of the top five shows in CHIKARA history. From the astoundingly great matwork clinic with Skayde/Pantera and the Increibles match at MA to the Portal vs. Quack/Storm, Brodie/Claudio and FIST/Colony matches from CT, it's just nonstop awesome. You even get some Kaiju goofiness, including a game of chicken conducted on Big Wheels.

PWG - All Star Weekend 6, Night 2

-Anderson/Koslov is a pretty standard opener, but Koslov gets in a bunch of nifty spots and keeps it from getting boring. Anderson's running comments through the match were entertaining as well. He hadn't shown a ton of charmisma the previous times that I've seen him, so I was surprised that he was so funny.

-King/Hero is outstanding. These two don't wrestle so much as have a straight up battle of wills. We get possibly the sickest headbutt of the entire feud from King and these two just whale away on one another, including some chops across the face that had me wincing. Not slaps...actual chops. It's not as good as the Loser Leaves CZW or TPI matches, but they also have to cut it short because Hero injures his knee. It was well on it's way to being another classic up to that point.

-Age of the Fall vs. Young Bucks probably stood out because it was entirely unlike the prior match, but yeah...really fun spotfest. And the more it fell apart, the better the match got. The final few minutes were awesome, as you had the Young Bucks trying to throw out everything in their arsenal, but they keep getting stuffed by the more experienced Jacobs/Black.

-This is my personal favorite Evans/Strong match ever. Not really a fan of Strong, but he delivers quite a beating here and what more can you ask for? Jack is on with his spots as well, so there's no big blown spots to comment about. How long has Strong been using that Kondo Clutch w/ body scissors? It looks way better than the Stronghold.

-Tornado/Candace is the best possible intergender match you can imagine. Lots of silly stuff and Tornado sells some really weak offense, but this was layed out really well and they made it look entirely believable that Candice could win at any time. She even manages to crack the balls of steel!

-This segues directly into Claudio vs Necro. Not a great match, but watching Claudio working completely out of his comfort zone was interesting. He's not a brawler at all, but Necro basically goaded him into it because...yeah, he's Necro friggin' Butcher. Absolutely *loved* the giant swing on the floor, where Claudio managed to basically wipe out the chairs on one side of the ring with Necro's skull. Fun match.

-Generico/Yokosuka was pretty disappointing. I've not seen a ton of Yokosuka, but I definitely expect more out Generico singles matches. It was really just two guys going out there and performing spots on one another. No build, nothing meaningful. The crowd was pretty much dead the entire night (as PWG crowds usually are) and even these two running through every head droppy sequence they had didn't pop them.

-I liked the last half of the Dynasty vs. Doi/Yoshino match, but the opening was almost an extension of the previous match. Just 4 guys hitting spots at random. When it tightened up down the stretch, though, it got really good.

-Supes/Taro was garbage, but even in the midst of all of that, you get a glimpse at how great a heel SD is. There are few guys in the business today that can have the crowd just eating out of their hands quite like he can. At any rate, Taro hasn't wrestled in years, but still manages to kick out of every crazy head drop SD pulls out, until finally being killed with the most ridiculously dangerous looking move I've possibly ever seen. I assume it was a blown Psycho Driver of some sort, as I just can't imagine Taro agreeing to essentially being driven headfirst into the ring like a dart. From the second rope, no less.

-I haven't seen the first CIMA/Danielson match to compare, but this one is pretty great. Really slow paced, with lots of matwork. It's never boring, though, and it actually ties in to the finish, so huzzah to that. The postmatch stuff is pretty stupid, but I have beef with the match itself. And CIMA asking for "five more days," then correcting himself with "six more seconds," was pretty funny.

DVDVR Mid-South set ballot

2008-08-24T00:30:00.002-05:00

Actually, I do have one more post left in me tonight. Here's my ballot for the Watts set. If you weren't arare, the Death Valley Driver board is currently running a series of "Best of the 80s" polls where they're putting together DVD sets with all of the notable matches from each territory and sending them out for nostalgic suckas like me to watch and rank. The Watts set was tremendous, as this is what I grew up watching. Definitely a trip down memory lane. The next set is Memphis, which I've seen very little of, so that will be fun as well. I'll finally get to see some stuff that I've only read about in the past and see how Lawler stacks up against the all time greats...

Anyway, here's my ballot:

1. Ted DiBiase vs. Hacksaw Duggan (No DQ, Loser Leaves Town, Coal Miner's Glove, Tuxedo, Cage Match) (3/22/85) [BR-14]
2. Dick Murdoch vs. Barry Windham (7/11/87) [BITUSA-13]
3. Ted DiBiase vs. Ric Flair (11/6/85) [BW-8]
4. Butch Reed vs. Dick Murdoch (9/22/85) [BW-1]
5. Ric Flair vs. Butch Reed (8/10/85) [TSGDIA-10]
6. Hacksaw Duggan vs. Buzz Sawyer (11/11/85) [BW-10]
7. Ric Flair vs. Terry Taylor (4/28/85) [BR-17]
8. Junkyard Dog & Mr. Olympia vs. Ted DiBiase & Matt Borne (Loser Leaves Town) (10/27/82) [PTB-8]
9. Ted DiBiase vs. Dick Murdoch (No DQ) (12/31/85) [JGP-9]
10. Butch Reed vs. Dick Murdoch (10/14/85) [BW-6]
11. The Fabulous Ones vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (Mexican Death Match) (1/24/86) [JGP-16]
12. Buzz Sawyer vs. Butch Reed (Dog Collar Match) (12/31/85) [JGP-10]
13. Terry Gordy vs. Dr. Death (12/26/86) [BSUSA-17]
14. Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan (No DQ) (3/8/85) [BR-13]
15. Chris Adams vs. Terry Taylor (5/3/87) [BITUSA-9]
16. Buzz Sawyer vs. Jim Duggan (Dog Collar Match) (12/27/85) [JGP-6]
17. Terry Taylor vs. Ric Flair (6/1/85) [RNRIK-7]
18. Mr. Wrestling II & Magnum T.A. vs. Midnight Express (2/10/84) [PTB-16]
19. Ted DiBiase & Terry Taylor vs. Michael Hayes & Buddy Roberts (Country Whipping Match) (10/12/86) [BSUSA-14]
20. Magnum T.A. vs. Ted DiBiase (No DQ) (Tulsa 5/27/84) [SDM-2]
21. Terry Gordy vs. Dr. Death (9/28/86) [BSUSA-13]
22. Dick Slater vs. Jake Roberts (No DQ, Dark Journey In A Cage) (2/28/86) [TB-9]
23. Chavo & Hector Guerrero vs. The Fabulous Ones (Texas Tornado Cage Match) (2/28/86) [TB-8]
24. Mr. Olympia vs. Chavo Guerrero (6/24/83) [PTB-13]
25. The Fantastics & Terry Taylor vs. The Sheepherders & Jack Victory (Barbed Wire Cage Match) (5/25/86) [TB-13]
26. Magnum T.A. vs. Ted DiBiase (No DQ) (OKC 5/27/84) [SDM-1]
27. Terry Gordy vs. Dr. Death (12/28/86) [BITUSA-1]
28. Chris Adams vs. Terry Taylor (4/19/87) [BITUSA-8]
29. Kerry Von Erich vs. Ric Flair (5/4/85) [RNRIK-4]
30. One Man Gang vs. Big Bubba Rogers (4/19/87) [BITUSA-7]
31. Rock N Roll Express & Hacksaw Duggan vs. Midnight Express & Ernie Ladd (6/8/84) [SDM-3]
32. Terry Gordy vs. Hacksaw Duggan (8/3/86) [BSUSA-6]
33. Ted DiBiase vs. Hacksaw Duggan (Street Fight) (7/29/83) [PTB-14]
34. Jake Roberts vs. Ric Flair (11/24/85) [BW-12]
35. Midnight Express vs. Bill Watts & Stagger Lee (4/22/84) [PTB-19]
36. Ted DiBiase vs. Bob Sweetan (Taped Fist) (10/11/85) [BW-3]
37. Kerry Von Erich vs. Ric Flair (4/28/85) [RNRIK-1]
38. Rock N Roll Express vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (2/13/85) [BR-11]
39. Dirty White Boys vs. Terry Daniels & Bill Dundee (5/11/85) [RNRIK-6]
40. Butch Reed vs. Ric Flair (11/8/85) [BW-9]
41. Terry Gordy vs. One Man Gang (9/21/86) [BSUSA-12]
42. Ric Flair vs. Wahoo McDaniel (7/12/85) [TSGDIA-3]
43. The Fantastics vs. Dr. Death & Jake Roberts (4/14/85) [BR-15]
44. Mr. Wrestling II & Magnum T.A. vs. Butch Reed & Jim Neidhart (Cage Match) (12/25/83) [PTB-15]
45. Butch Reed vs. Ric Flair (10/11/85) [BW-4]
46. Rock N Roll Express & Hacksaw Duggan vs. Midnight Express & Ernie Ladd (7/2/84) [SDM-4]
47. Ric Flair vs. Terry Taylor (5/3/85) [RNRIK-3]
48. Terry Gordy vs. Dr. Death (9/15/86) [BSUSA-11]
49. Dick Murdoch vs. Dr. Death (9/20/85) [TSGDIA-12]
50. Ted DiBiase vs. Dick Murdoch (12/27/85) [JGP-5]
51. Terry Gordy vs. Dr. Death (6/22/86) [BSUSA-3]
52. Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express (6/30/85) [TSGDIA-1]
53. Ted DiBiase vs. Jake Roberts (7/22/85) [TSGDIA-7]
54. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Michael Hayes & Buddy Roberts (Lumberjack Match) (8/31/86) [BSUSA-9]
55. Dick Murdoch vs. Dr. Death (6/13/87) [BITUSA-11]
56. The Fantastics vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (10/12/84) [SDM-13]
57. Terry Taylor vs. Jake Roberts (2/11/86) [TB-3]
58. Eddie Gilbert & Dick Murdoch vs. Lightning Express (7/21/87) [BITUSA-14]
59. Ted DiBiase vs. One Man Gang (No DQ) (2/6/87) [BITUSA-5]
60. Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express (1/21/85) [BR-8]
61. Eddie Gilbert vs. Dr. Death (5/17/87) [BITUSA-10]
62. Rock N Roll Express vs. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death (5/3/85) [RNRIK-2]
63. Dick Slater vs. Butch Reed (No DQ) (12/13/85) [JGP-2]
64. Ted DiBiase vs. One Man Gang (11/18/86) [BSUSA-16]
65. Butch Reed vs. Dick Slater (11/22/85) [BW-11]
66. Magnum T.A. vs. Ted DiBiase (7/6/84) [SDM-5]
67. Mr. Olympia vs. Bob Roop (7/15/82) [PTB-5]
68. Ted DiBiase vs. Terry Taylor (7/3/85) [TSGDIA-2]
69. The Fantastics vs. Midnight Express (No DQ) (9/28/84) [SDM-11]
70. Dick Murdoch vs. The Nightmare (7/14/85) [TSGDIA-5]
71. Hacksaw Duggan, Terry Taylor & Bill Watts vs. The Fabulous Freebirds (8/17/86) [BSUSA-8]
72. The Fabulous Ones vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (12/27/85) [JGP-4]
73. Junkyard Dog & Mr. Olympia vs. Ted DiBiase & Hacksaw Duggan (8/18/82) [PTB-6]
74. Ted DiBiase vs. Butch Reed (7/25/85) [TSGDIA-8]
75. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Hacksaw Duggan & Terry Gordy (Texas Tornado Match) (1/21/85) [BR-9]
76. Dick Slater vs. Hacksaw Duggan (4/11/86) [TB-10]
77. Midnight Express vs. Rock N Roll Express (No DQ: Tag Titles vs. $50,000) (5/23/84) [PTB-20]
78. Jim Duggan, Dick Murdoch & Bill Watts vs. Kamala, Kareem Muhammad & Skandor Akbar (7/28/85) [TSGDIA-9]
79. The Fantastics vs. Midnight Express (OKC 8/9/84) [SDM-7]
80. Dick Slater vs. Jake Roberts (2/14/86) [TB-5]
81. The Fabulous Ones vs. Chavo & Hector Guerrero (12/29/85) [JGP-7]
82. Ted DiBiase vs. Brad Armstrong (2/10/85) [BR-10]
83. Stagger Lee & Mr. Olympia vs. Ted DiBiase & Matt Borne (12/18/82) [PTB-9]
84. Dick Slater vs. Hacksaw Duggan (12/31/85) [JGP-11]
85. Ted DiBiase vs. Bob Sweetan (10/13/85) [BW-5]
86. Hacksaw Duggan, Terry Taylor & Bill Watts vs. The Fabulous Freebirds (7/20/86) [BSUSA-4]
87. The Fantastics vs. Buzz Sawyer & Dick Slater (10/27/85) [BW-7]
88. Mr. Wrestling II & Junkyard Dog vs. Matt Borne & Ted DiBiase (2/16/83) [PTB-10]
89. Buzz Sawyer vs. Dr. Death (1/28/86) [JGP-17]
90. Terry Gordy vs. Terry Taylor (6/13/86) [BSUSA-1]
91. Dick Slater vs. Butch Reed (1/1/86) [JGP-13]
92. Terry Taylor vs. Buddy Roberts (6/8/86) [TB-15]
93. Dick Slater vs. Dr. Death (12/18/85) [JGP-3]
94. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Dick Murdoch & Masked Superstar (2/14/86) [TB-4]
95. Rock N Roll Express vs. Terry Gordy & Buddy Roberts (6/24/85) [RNRIK-9]
96. Michael Hayes & Buddy Roberts vs. Ted DiBiase & Terry Taylor (5/25/86) [TB-14]
97. Dick Slater vs. Jake Roberts (1/24/86) [JGP-15]
98. Dick Slater vs. Jake Roberts (1/1/86) [JGP-12]
99. Ted DiBiase, Dr. Death & Jim Duggan vs. Masked Superstar, Dick Murdoch & Buzz Sawyer (1/31/86) [TB-1]
100. Ted DiBiase, Dr. Death, Terry Taylor & Hacksaw Duggan vs. Dick Murdoch, Buzz Sawyer & The Masked Superstars (2/28/86) [TB-7]
101. The Fantastics vs. Bill Dundee & Dutch Mantell (9/22/85) [TSGDIA-13]
102. Terry Gordy vs. Terry Taylor (6/17/86) [BSUSA-2]
103. Eddie Gilbert & Dick Murdoch vs. Terry Gordy & Buddy Roberts (6/25/87) [BITUSA-12]104. Rock N Roll Express vs. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death (6/19/85) [RNRIK-8]
105. Hacksaw Duggan & Dick Murdoch vs. Kamala & Kareem Muhammad (7/14/85) [TSGDIA-6]
106. Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero vs. Rock N Roll Express & Jose Lothario (Elimination Match) (1/18/85) [BR-7]
107. The Fantastics vs. Sting & Eddie Gilbert (9/7/86) [BSUSA-10]
108. Chris Adams & Terry Taylor vs. Eddie Gilbert & Iceman Parsons (3/20/87) [BITUSA-6]109. Chavo Guerrero vs. Buzz Sawyer (6/13/86) [TB-16]
110. The Fantastics & Terry Taylor vs. The Sheepherders & Jack Victory (5/9/86) [TB-12]
111. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Terry Gordy & Michael Hayes (Badstreet Match) (1/25/87) [BITUSA-4]
112. Buddy Landel & Butch Reed vs. Rock N Roll Express (3/28/84) [PTB-17]
113. Gustavo Mendoza vs. Brett Wayne Sawyer (5/9/86) [TB-11]
114. Bob Roop vs. Mike George (12/16/81) [PTB-1]
115. Rock N Roll Express vs. Dirty White Boys (5/11/85) [RNRIK-5]
116. The Fantastics vs. Dutch Mantell & Bill Dundee (10/4/85) [BW-2]
117. Brad Armstrong vs. Ted DiBiase (1/16/85) [BR-5]
118. The Fantastics & Hacksaw Duggan vs. Midnight Express & Jim Cornette (7/20/84) [SDM-6]
119. Adrian Street vs. Chris Adams (10/10/84) [SDM-12]
120. Killer Khan vs. Chris Adams (9/9/84) [SDM-9]
121. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Terry Gordy & Michael Hayes (Badstreet Match) (1/9/87) [BITUSA-2]
122. Buddy Landel, Chavo & Hector Guerrero vs. Brickhouse Brown, Bill Dundee & Jose Lothario (Elimination Match) (11/16/84) [BR-2]
123. The Fantastics vs. John Tatum & Jack Victory (11/4/86) [BSUSA-15]
124. Koko B. Ware vs. Eddie Gilbert (2/28/86) [TB-6]
125. Terry Taylor vs. John Tatum (8/17/86) [BSUSA-7]
126. Dick Murdoch & Masked Superstar vs. Brett Sawyer & Al Perez (1/19/86) [JGP-14]
127. Rock N Roll Express vs. Dirty White Boys (4/15/85) [BR-16]
128. Chavo Guerrero vs. Steve Keirn (no DQ loser is painted yellow match) (1/31/86) [TB-2]
129. The Fantastics & Dr. Death vs. The Fabulous Freebirds (1/18/87) [BITUSA-3]
130. Dusty Rhodes & Jim Duggan vs. Butch Reed & Hercules Hernandez (8/19/84) [SDM-8]
131. Midnight Express vs. Bill Dundee & Porkchop Cash (4/6/84) [PTB-18]
132. One Man Gang vs. Buck Robley (Lumberjack Match) (9/15/82) [PTB-7]
133. Ted DiBiase & Dr. Death vs. Jake Roberts & The Barbarian (7/14/85) [TSGDIA-4]
134. Kevin Von Erich vs. Chris Adams (1/18/85) [BR-6]
135. Butch Reed vs. Iron Sheik (4/8/83) [PTB-11]
136. Rock N Roll Express vs. Jake Roberts & The Barbarian (6/28/85) [RNRIK-10]
137. The Fantastics & Missing Link vs. Eddie Gilbert, John Tatum & Sting (8/3/86) [BSUSA-5]
138. Ernie Ladd & Butch Reed vs. Magnum T.A. & Master G (Street Fight) (11/4/84) [BR-1]
139. Al Perez & Wendell Cooley vs. Dr. Death & Bob Sweetan (8/30/85) [TSGDIA-11]
140. Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express (Scaffold Match) (12/2/84) [BR-3]
141. Butch Reed vs. Skip Young (9/23/84) [SDM-10]
142. Nick Bockwinkel vs. Dusty Rhodes (5/20/83) [PTB-12]
143. Eddie Gilbert & The Nightmare vs. The Bruise Brothers (12/31/85) [JGP-8]
144. Bob Roop vs. Ted DiBiase (4/2/82) [PTB-3]
145. Mr. Olympia vs. Paul Orndorff (2/3/82) [PTB-2]
146. Junkyard Dog vs. Nick Bockwinkel (6/11/82) [PTB-4]
147. Rock N Roll Express & Butch Reed vs. Dr. Death, Kamala & One Man Gang (2/25/85) [BR-12]
148. Adrian Street vs. Terry Taylor (Loser Leaves Town) (12/7/84) [BR-4]
149. Brickhouse Brown & Master G vs. Butch Reed & Ernie Ladd (10/21/84) [SDM-14]
150. Jake Roberts vs. Lord Humongous (Cage Match) (11/29/85) [JGP-1]

Random stuff #4!

2008-08-24T00:14:00.002-05:00

This is it for the night, I think. I'll try to cross post things to the blog more often. It is why we have it, after all!

ROH - Reborn Again

This was an interesting show. Obviously booked as a complete filler show the night before the first PPV taping, I ended up liking it more than most shows, because it didn't have that stupid "every match is going to be a MOTYC!' feel that the worst ROH shows do. A laid back ROH would be so much better that I can't even comprehend it.

(I'm typically unusual when it comes to my ROH fandom. I like the shows that the fanboys hate and usually dislike the heavily hyped shows. Their product just isn't booked with someone like me in mind. Still some great wrestling to be found if you're willing to st through a lot of filler that just pretends to be great wrestling...)

-Haze/Nikki Roxx was pretty awful. The SHIMMER showcases so rarely provide us with something other than minutes filled on a disc. Not sure why they're still done on the main show.

-Steen/Generico had a really fun extended squash versus Blade/Edwards. Steen is like the perfect ROH guy. He has a ton of huge spots that just kill guys and yeah...he's not afraid to use them. He's not always the best at making stuff work in any sort of context, but he doesn't have to be with that crowd. Generico picks up the slack at making everything work and he's certainly not afraid to kill guys, either.

-Who's Bobby Fish? I know he's worked NOAH, but where is he from? Is he a Harley Race guy? He didn't seem too bad.

-I was on board with Danielson's return right up until I had to watch the NRC wrestle. Ugh. The finish of this match was so blown that it was downright laughable. It made Matt Cross look like a complete moron and Davey didn't look much better, standing there waiting for him to get into position.

-Tank Toland delivers the goods once again. He hits a *sick* waterwheel slam here, then follows up with the most vicious looking BT Bomb (actually, he flips it more into a Dominator) I've ever seen. They pretty much need to scrape Mitch Franklin up at the end.

-Marufuji/Sydal was what you'd expect, just at 3/4 speed. I wouldn't say that they "phoned it in," but they were obviously saving themselves for the PPV taping. Still a fun match, but nothing that'll blow you away.

-I had a lot of hope for Delirious vs KENTA, but that went unfulfilled. KENTA looked bored and didn't sell a thing. He worked as if he were Vader in '92 going through a job guy. Don't get me wrong, Delirious got to hit all of his stuff and, on the surface at least, it was worked as a competitive match, but KENTA just bulled his way through most of this.

-Briscoes vs. Morishima/Whitmer was pretty much just Briscoes-style overkill from start to finish. If you like that, then you'll be right at home here. It was certainly never boring, at the very least.

-Jimmy Jacobs presents "Love to Spare." Great stuff. Loved the Office style cutaway promos with both of them through the night and you have to love how ever suffering Jacobs is rewarded for defending Lacey's honor...with a *wave* goodnight. God, how I love this angle.

(I have a total man crush on Jimmy Jacobs and I haven't even reached the Age of the Fall shows yet. Pretty much the perfect pro wrestler, as far as I'm concerned. For what I'm into, anyway.)

-Finally finished up the New Japan 1/4 Dome show. Pretty solid throughout, but I wasn't really overwhelmed by anything on the show. Probably the most notable moment was Scotty Steiner practically killing Bernard trying to get him over for an Exploder. Bernard comes down at a sick angle and I was shocked that he got back up.

I thought the IWGP title match was good, but if Tanahashi had dicked it up and went after the shoulder from the start it probably would have helped the match, since it didn't really kick into gear until he did so.

At any rate, there's some tremendous camera work here. Easily the best produced show outside of what WWE puts out. They manage to build emotion just through camera angles (I'm specifically thinking of the great shot during Tanahashi's intro where we see him coming out, all smiles, while there's a tight shot of a solemn Nakamura in the foreground), which is no small feat.

(I don't follow puro closely at all, but I really enjoyed this show. Can't wait to pick up this year's G1 shows. Just so many great names that I don't think I can pass it up. I should also point out that Togi Makabe is the best heel in the world right now.)

CHIKARA - Deuces Wild

-Fun opener between the Osirian Portal and the Colony. The chick that Ophidian terrifies before the match was pretty cute. Err...standard CHIKARA opener otherwise.

-I was kinda hoping for a little more shtick from the Ellis/Ice Cream match. It didn't bring as much funny as I thought it would. But really? How can you be disappointed by a Robbie Ellis match? He does take a ridiculously stiff powerbomb for a guy his age, though, so there is that.

-The Bull Pain angle was great, because Bull can lay in a beating that looks legit and he absolutely murders Worker Ant here. He also lets some foul language slip, which is possibly the easiest way to draw heat in CHIKARA. Heh.

-Am I the only person left who digs Icarus? He was great in this match. He wasn't all angry Icarus like normal, though. He seemed like he was trying to out-shtick Chuck Taylor. Not going to happen, but fun to watch nevertheless. I don't like Uno much, but CAW actually looked pretty good in this match. Wonders never cease!

-Lince blows a bunch of spots in the match with Helios. In other news, the sun rose today. He tried to pull off a quebrada that had been completely blown (because he missed the ropes) and ended up spiking himself headfirst. Not a bad flippy match overall, but yeah...not a great night for Lince.

-Akuma manages to majorly blow a springboard spot as well. Not a good night to be a flyer for anyone, apparently. Why did I never notice how good Jimmy Olsen is? He looks like he's banged up after delivering a German, but up until that point he looks pretty great. Also good on commentary, for what it's worth.

-UMB/Donst is a fun match. Also the start of the big angle, as Donst is concussed after a particularly sick Praying Mantis Bomb. Mantis leads him to the back as Donst tries to figure out where he is.

-Brodie Lee friggin' ANNIHILATES Shane Storm and I loved every single second of it. The big boot at the end just looks fatal, even by Brodie standards.

-Mitch/Hawke put on a heel clinic, figuring out 1001 different ways to cheat in the match with Cheech & Cloudy. Really simple, old school stuff, but the crowd (and me!) was eating it up. This is where I would interject the rant about how wrestling has gotten too complicated, but I don't have the energy for it right now.

-Quack/Pantera was awesome. Just an exhibition of Lucha matwork, with both guys just busting out hold after hold. Not much story to speak of (Pantera busts out a bunch of Quack's holds, but they never really follow up and even the announcers barely mention it), but in terms of just a flat out technical match, this was aces. Looked like Bryce blew the finish, as Quack had Pantera in the CHIKARA Special. Pantera started banging on the mat to get the crowd behind him and Bryce called for the bell. Quack just glared at him for a few seconds before selling it as being surprised about getting the submission out of nowhere. I'm sure that conversation in the locker room was humorous.

CHIKARA - Passion & Persistence

Don't know if it's just because I haven't been sleeping well this week or if it really is just a lackluster show, but I just couldn't get into this at all. Took me a few days to get through it and I had to rewatch a bunch of stuff because I kept zonking out. It was a typical CHIKARA funfest, but that just wasn't clicking for me this time.

-The opener with Vin & Bull killing the Colony was all sorts of fun, but I'm a really big Bull Pain fan, so I'm predisposed to digging his stuff.

-Chucky T versus Hydra was every bit as goofy as it sounds. Hydra swallows the grenade! Bryce has to perform the Heimlich and, luckily, tragedy is averted. You can certainly ignore this in terms of the wrestling, though.

-Young Timothy Donst CHEATS TO WIN! Really loving this angle so far.

-This is where the show just died for me, as the Amasis/Helios put me to sleep *twice*. I adore the Portal, but this match was definitely a reminder of how inexperienced Amasis is.

-The Fab 4 8-man wasn't all that great outside of the last minute or two and the postmatch shenanigans w/Sweeney and Mitch (and Shayne Hawke stirring up crap the entire time).

-Pantera/Sabian was just flat out bad. They didn't mesh well at all.

-Show picked up a bit with the first Claudio/Brodie match, but the finish was pretty crappy. At least Brodie makes up for it by kicking Claudio's face clean off after the match.

-The Incoherence/F.I.S.T. match was...off. That most of the match is worked around Icarus' fanny pack tells you all you need to know. Not a bad match, but Delirious, in particular, looked like he was a half stap slower than everyone else in the ring for some reason. I also wasn't a fan of Delirious being killed, but being magically revived by 'Wicked ringing the bell spot. There was some cool stuff in this one, though. Delirious chops Akuma in the back of the head, HARD, and Akuma doesn't look like he was expecting it. He looked a bit miffed and proceeded to take it out on 'Wicked, who was the legal man.

Speaking of 'Wicked, he must be in a big boot competition with Brodie, because he lays in a shot to Icarus, I think, that was wince inducing.

CHIKARA - Cafe Culture

Guess I'm back into the CHIKARA groove, because this was a fantastic show.

-In any other promotion, Louden Noxious would be tremendously friggin' annoying, but he somehow just fits into the CHIKARA family. I mean...that's exactly the sort of ring announcing that you'd expect a company like this to have. I wish he wouldn't talk over the music quite as much (though the sound system was dead through most of this show), but that's my only gripe.

-I love Shayne Hawke as he slowly morphs into Mitch Ryder's shadow. He has a great line during the ONST match where he's talking about Donst's facepaint and says that if Mantis asked him, he'd wear paint too...but he'd have to clear it with Mitch first. You don't think of Mitch as a shit kicker or anything, but Hawke just stands behind him and needles the crowd/opponents/whoever with total confidence that Mitch will save his ass. It's great.

-The crowd sure loves them some Bobby Dempsey. He's not very good, but he connects with the crowd and works some decent fat guy spots. He also smears Ophidian in the corner after a somersault splash.

-Hallowicked/Amasis was better than expected. I prefer Amasis in tags at this point. Nothing against him, as he's pretty much still a rookie, but I do think he sort of meanders from time to time in singles, as if he's not sure how to fill an entire match on his own.

-Pelle, as always, is a great underdog babyface. That doesn't necessarily work versus Icarus, who isn't the guy to lay in the beating that you need to work from underneath, but this was still a fun match. Icarus has been awesome this year. People always talk about guys who you couldn't turn heel because the fans love them so much. Icarus is pretty much the exact opposite of that. I don't think people would like him even if they went the Money Mayweather route and had him throw cash into the crowd. I think people would toss it back at him. Heh.

-First Rey De Voladores 4-way (Helios, TJ Cannon, Lince & PSYCHO) was pretty decent. Just nonstop action and all sorts of interesting flippy spots. Not sure why they brought in PSYCHO, as he barely got to do anything before being eliminated. I don't recall Lince blowing any spots, so huzzah for him.

-Kingston returns here, telling us that he's not booked for the show. If he was, he probably wouldn't have shown up. He lays out an open challenge, which sets up him killing Storm for the second time. Or so I'm hoping, at any rate.

-ONST vs Pantera/Colony was fun, with Donst and Hydra jockeying for position as Mantis' golden child. Donst shoves Hydra out of the way and steals one of his spots. At any rate, everyone leaves without him and he's all bummed. We get a Vin Gerard run in here as well. And to show how dedicated he is, he actually sits in the crowd with his Spider-Man mask on for the entire show and no one even realizes that it's him until he hits the ring. Good stuff. Who knew that *anyone* would give two craps about friggin' EQUINOX, of all people?

-F.I.S.T vs QuackenStorm is mostly shtick, but it's fun shtick. Not really any foreshadowing of the Storm turn at this point

-Skayde vs. Claudio was AWESOME. Just a ton of tricked out matwork by both guys. There wasn't much of Claudio as base, but I guess they wanted to leave the flying to the Voladores tourney. At any rate, if you dig the llave style, you'll probably like this.

-Main event 4-way (Stupefied/Sonjay/Turbo/Incognito) was pretty much the low point for me. Turbo didn't kill any cameramen and Sonjay didn't do much but Fargo strut through the entire match. Incognito looked okay, but Stupefied was the only real standout. So, of course, Incognito won...

Random stuff #3

2008-08-23T23:54:00.002-05:00

We're rolling now! Though it occurs to me that I should have posted these in reverse, since they'd make way more sense that way. Meh.

-Took me ages to get through, but I've finally watched the IWA 500th show from TLC through King/Scorp. There's some truly godawful wrestling to be found here. The TLC match is just 45 minutes of absolute hell. No one sells a thing, it's just random flip after random flip after random flip after random flip (broken up only by blown spots or people landing on their heads in an awkward manner) and it just drags on forever. I can't stress enough just how brutally bad this is. Don't watch it. Ever. Seriously, if you buy the DVD...skip this match. Trust me. The Conflict of Interest match was nearly as bad, actually. Just a total nonsensical cluster of a match. When the announcers have to put over that none of the participants know the rules to cover the absolute stupidity happening in the ring, you know you're in for a mind scorching good time...

(I can't stress to you enough how bad these matches are. You rarely see me shit on pro wrestling, as I can find a redeeming moment in pretty much anything, but this? This was just flat out insulting.)

On the other hand, Kingston/Scorpio was really good. Really slow build, with lots of early matwork that you wouldn't expect from King. They ramp it up pretty quickly, though, and when they go into the striking sequence it's pretty much just a sprint to the end. Scorpio has been criminally overlooked. One of the best talents of the last 15 years or so, though you'd be hard pressed to find more than a handful of people outside of the business who'd agree.

-Watched the first disc and a half of the new Rock set. I had forgotten how genuinely enjoyable he is in the ring. People go on and on about the shtick, but the only conversation you really see about his work is about his crappy Sharpshooter. The guy was a really smart worker and timed his comebacks perfectly. And since his matches actually generated heat, every big match he had came across as being epic. Been great fun to watch some of this stuff over again.

(I miss the Rock like crazy. I imagine the stuff that could have happened with him still in the picture and it just blows my mind. That we'll likely never get to see Rock/HBK and Rock/Cena is tragic.)

-I don't throw around snowflakes very much, but I think ****3/4 is a tad high. I didn't quite enjoy it as much as the match at 'Mania 13, but I'm a sucker for a high level brawl. This was much more mat based, though the brawling segments are friggin' great. Bret looks great after being off for months and Austin hangs with him the entire way. I'd seen the finish 1000 times, but when you watch the entire match, you see how well it plays into everything else they'd done to that point. Extra points for some phenomenal commentary by Ross and Vince. People forget that Vince was great in that role. He didn't know the names of the moves or anything but he was so underrated in his ability to drive home the point of the match and where things would spin off to in the future.

(This is referring to the Bret/Austin match from Survivor Series, by the way...)

-Started watching IWC's "Super Indy VII" show. Pretty fun so far.

-Michael Facade versus CJ Sensation never had a chance to build to anything, as John McChesney comes out and just annihilates both guys. Really sick chairshot to Facade here.

-Shiima Xion vs. Luke Hawx was pretty good. I was kinda distracted by Xion's new bald look, though. He's just not the same without the hair. At any rate, this has the problem that all one night tournaments have, as the early round matches are too short to really mean anything.

-Jason Gory versus Jerry Lynn was, err...a Jerry Lynn match. If you like the things that scenario entails, you'll probably dig this. I'm not as big a fan of nearfall-laden exhibition wrestling, though, so yeah. This was just sorta there for me.

-MCMG vs. Sexual Harassment could have been *great* with an extra 10 minutes or so. Lots of really nifty stuff. It ended up being compressed as they raced from spot to spot, though. Seriously, there's no better team (in terms of tandem offense) than the Machine Guns right now. And there hasn't been since the Midnight Express, actually.

-Finished Super Indy VII. Fun show, but nothing overwhelming. I kinda think that knowing Lynn was going all the way took me out of it. The match versus Davey Richards in the finals was way too short but, amazingly enough, came off pretty well. I imagine that to someone who likes either guy, it would be even better.

I will say that the Sandman/Dennis Gregory bootcamp match is probably the worst match I've seen in several years. Just brutally, brutally bad, as Sandman was so bombed that he could barely stand up. Totally embarrassing.

I also watched the TNA: Year One doc. Not much that someone who follows the business doesn't already know, but it's a fairly interesting watch. Even if you do have to look at Bob Ryder's giant pumpkin head.

-The Flair/Race match (8/31/83) on the new Flair set is amazing. Far better than the match at Starrcade. Tons of back and forth action with Flair avoiding all of Harley's big spots like they were death. Really basic offense, but both guys are so believable (Harley as the legit badass, Flair as the wrestling machine) and they both sold so well that it worked really well. Bob Orton/Dick Slater also try to fracture Flair's skull with a sick spike piledriver at the end, so I guess there's at least one nasty spot, for those of you who require such things to enjoy a match.

-Just watched the Mecha/Kiku Lyger vs. Lyger/MMA Lyger (don't know the name offhand) match from the Minoru Suzuki show. First puro I've watched this year aside from the New Japan Dome show and a random Hero/Briscoes 6-man tag from NOAH. Missy Hyatt, of all people, linked it and since it was so short, I thought I'd check it out. This is a short (sub 10 minute) comedy match with some funny Lyger-centric spots. I *loved* MechaLyger's palm strike flurry and the MMA dude trying to pull guard every time he got into the ring, only to be pummeled was hilarious as well.

ROH - The Battle Of St Paul

Really fun show. They totally lost me with the 4-way and the mind numbingly boring Strong/Daniels match, but the main (Aries/Morishima) more than made up for it. Really, really hot match and the brainbuster/450 nearfall sequence was incredible.

-Women's tag (Death Rey/Danger vs MN Homewrecking Crew) was world's better than the average SHIMMER showcase match, but really, nothing special overall. Del Rey certainly likes laying in the stiff kicks, though.

-Jimmy Rave makes his return...to a huge face reaction? That doesn't compute. He's friggin' awesome in destroying Michael Elgin, but people cheering for Jimmy Rave makes Jesus cry.

-Shingo/Whitmer is exactly what you'd expect from these two. Lots of hard strikes and guys being randomly dumped on their head . You'll love this if that's your thing.

-I hate the Ultimate Endurance gimmick, but this was the debut of the CHIKARA crew in ROH, so I find it difficult to hate on this. Actually, this was pretty great. Not quite as much overkill from the Briscoes as usual. I don't know if they needed to take all three falls, but yeah...whatever.

-Pearce/Albright vs. 'Cide/Cabana was a really fun arena spanning brawl. 'Cide is wearing a goofy smiley face bandana here, which is the only positive to come of the ridiculous team with Cabana.

(I still can't believe that, after Homicide had *literally* tried to MURDER Cabana on multiple occasions, they did the stupid repect thing and had them hug at the end of the feud. Totally retarded in every way. To me, this is the single dumbest thing Gabe has ever booked, actually.)

-4 way (Delirious/Romero/Evans/Stevens) was trash, but it furthered an angle, I guess. A waste of all four of these guys.

-Speaking of a waste, Strong/Daniels feels like it's 5 hours long and then they give us a lame cop out finish? Thanks for stealing my life, ROH! Allison Danger's tiny little cheerleader skirt almost saves this, though, as she manages to wiggle her sweet little ass through frame like 10 different times during the course of this. One takes what one can get.

-The main was incredible. Can't stand Aries, but he absolutely made this match. Morishima is a top notch killing machine, of course, but without a guy who can take the bumps and sell it, it doesn't mean much. Aries makes all of this look believable. This is easily the best of the Morishima defenses that I've seen so far.

-Started Good Times, Great Memories. The opening scramble is really fun. I like the CHIKARA guys working a more ROH-styled spotfest than the CHIKARA style spotty match. It's kind of a shame at how much Quack is dumbing himself down in his first two matches here. Partially a result of the gimmicks of the matches, but yeah...spotty Quack isn't necessarily something I want to see with any regularity. The Doomsday tope he hits on Akuma and, uh...Jiggy, I think (?) was absolutely bad ass, though.

Good Times, Great Memories (cont.)

-I was all set to jump on the Erick Stevens train (no pun intended) because he was selling his ass off in the match with Daniels. He wasn't doing anything that required him to lift Daniels at all after the rib work begins. But then he flips that selling switch off and just ignores the previous 5 minutes or so. Anyway, this was wrestled like a draw from the start, so the finish was no surprise. Eh. Daniels postmatch promos was great. Nice to see him show a bit of emotion, since that's usually the thing about him that I can't stand. Also, have I mentioned that Alison Danger has a great ass?

-4CS was...better than expected. I hesitate to call it good, though. I wish Jimmy Rave got 100x more recognition for being awesome. Great heel, and a far better than average worker. As I've said before, he's actually good enough to convince the 'bots that he sucks, so that's saying something.

-You know, I can't stand Aries for the most part, but the Morishima match from the last show made me realize that if he actually sold with any consistency at all, he might be someone worth paying more attention to. He's still all flash, no substance as far as I'm concerned.

(I should have edited out some of these "I hate Aries" comments. Keep in mind that these posts span the better part of a year. I really don't go around saying that I dislike Austin Aries every time I touch a keyboard. Heh.)

-So this is the show that birthed the Toland/Dempsey stuff? Who knew I'd ever look forward to seeing Tank Toland? He's friggin' great here. I hope I don't have to watch him in matches longer than 5 minutes in upcoming shows, because I think he'll prove to be great only in small doses.

-Title match was a bunch of Fighting Spirit junk tossed out seemingly at random. Both guys are better than this.

(If memory serves, this was a Morishima/Shingo match that I'm referring to. I like how I just talk about crap without mentioning anyone who was involved. Vagueness!)

-Machine Guns/Briscoes was just flat out great and I'm totally sold on the Briscoes all over again. Nothing much I can say about this that hasn't already been stated. I know it'll change with the upcoming feud with Steen/Generico, but it's nice to see the Briscoes work against an actual *team*. I think their stuff gets a little too "Briscoe-y" at times just because they seem to work makeshift teams so often. You only get good versus good opposition and the Guns brought the best out of them here.

-Cabana's final match was nothing special, but it was everything you'd want from his farewell, so it hit on every level. Gotta love Pearce spitting in his face after the match before storming to the back. I appreciate Pearce being a heel and not stooping to the stupid lovey dovey act you usually get in farewell shows.

More random stuff!

2008-08-23T23:32:00.002-05:00

Yeah, you'll notice that I tend to save up CHIKARA shows and then watch them marathon-style. So I sometimes go weeks without watching anything other DVDs. So be prepared, as this is probably mostly going to be about everyone's favorite little indy...

-Also watched the first disc of CHIKARA's International Invaders, Night 2. Much better than the first night so far, but most of the highlights have actually been on commentary. I loved the bit where Chikarason talks about Sleepy Hollow and somehow mentions that Hallowicked lives in a tree. Chris Hero just flips out for the remainder of the match, including wondering aloud how 'Wicked can review tapes of his opponents if he lives in a tree. Great stuff. You also get a 'Mantis riff on the state of healthcare in the US as opposed to Canada, so yeah...this can't be beat.

(Is there any doubt that CHIKARA has the best commentary in wrestling right now? A lot of stuff is played for laughs, but you have guys like Quack who do commentary when you need a more serious tone. Ultramantis Black should have replaced Tazz on ECW. Seriously...)

-I finished off the first disc of Cibernetico & Robin this morning. Olsens versus Up in Smoke absolutely brings the goods. Didn't think it could possibly live up to the praise I've seen, but yeah...I was absolutely wrong. They keep the pace quick, there's some really fluid double team stuff (from the Olsens in particular) and the funny stuff is actually funny. What more can you ask for out of a midcard tag sprint? Also, that dive into the tornado DDT on the floor was tremendous. Cheech certainly died for his sins in this match and it was awesome to watch.

(It's a shame that Colin D. Olsen disappeared into the ether soon after this. I hope Jimmy Jam can track him down!)

Didn't really care for the BLK OUT match, because, quite honestly, no matter how much I like the Colony (and I do), with the way King is being booked at this point in time, I don't buy them as being competitive. Especially when Joker is standing next to King. They might pull their tricks on Sabian, but yeah...the end result of this should have been murder most foul.

-Got through Bruised and the first disc of New Star Navigation. Young Timothy Donst sure does like to get his ass stomped, doesn't he? The first match with Kingston is more brutal overall (and probably the better match as well), but this one has possibly the sickest headbutt I've ever seen. The NSN match versus Icarus is really good as well. He has a ton of naysayers, but Icarus has kicked up the awesome in the latter half of '07. He's pretty well shattered the "Icarus sucks" myth by this point.

(Fuck my hemming and hawing. Icarus RULES. How am I the only person to see this? Or am I just ahead of the curve, like usual? Heh.)

Actually, I'm wondering why people aren't talking NSN up a bit more. It's been pretty much fantastic so far. The Osirian Portal/Incoherence match is aces. Every bit as good as the Olsens/Up In Smoke match from the Cibernetico & Robin show.

-Finished the 2007 CHIKARA season and I'm halfway through "Two Eyebrows...". Lots of fun stuff worth talking about (like Brodie Lee kicking everyone's faces off!), but I'm just going to skip over it all and go straight to the sublime Kingston/Storm match. Sweet Christ, was that ever great. Who knew Shane Storm had it in him? Brutal, brutal match and one of the rare instances where SMV's instant replays didn't annoy me. I wanted to see that backfist from both camera angles and in slow mo. Seriously, Storm must have owed King money.

(This was a beautiful beatdown. You should really check it out. Shane Storm sucks, but he takes it like a man. I'm curious to see how he comes off as a rudo, since he can focus on his strengths and cut out the fat guy lucha stuff he tries and fails at doing well.)

Also dug the stuff with Colin Olsen hiding his sordid ECW experience from Jimmy. Maybe I'll comment on the other stuff when I have a bit more time on my hands...

-Blew through King of Trios '08, officially catching up with all of the CHIKARA shows I currently own. I'll wait until this past weekend's shows come out pick up the rest.

Anyway, fabulous tournament overall. There were a handful of really good matches, but really, everything had enough of a fun quotient to make it worth watching. Somewhat unrelated, but someone in the past week or so (sorry, can't remember who and I can't be assed to find the post) was wondering why CHIKARA fans don't attack the booking of outside talent over the CHIKARA mainstays. Really, these shows are a perfect demonstration of why that is. Not to play up the ROH/CHIKARA comparison, since it's ridiculous (the only thing they have in common is being indy wrestling based in the Northeast), but the general CHIKARMY member I would say takes pro wrestling much, much, much less seriously than the general ROHbot. It wouldn't occur to me to complain about how guys are booked. You know why? At the end of the day, if I get a fun match out of it, the winners and losers really don't matter. Especially in a tournament situation, which is probably the best place, as a booker, to indulge your OMG INDY DREAM MATCH!!!!! fantasies. Anyway, enough talk of CHIKARA booking. The wrestling itself and oddball comedy has always been what matters there. I feel slightly more smarmy even putting the words "booking" and CHIKARA in the same sentence.

(Well...this was a random post. I guess the point stands, but I don't remember typing this at all and can't imagine why I cared enough to do so. Especially since I largely ignore the actual shows. Seriously, if you want to know where to start your slow descent into CHIKARA madness, King of Trios '08 is the spot. Watch it, love it.)

-All I can say about the Jacobs/Whitmer I Quit match from the IWA 500th show is WOW. What an amazing match. Jimmy Jacobs is every single thing I love about pro wrestling wrapped up in one tiny, ass kicking package. Tons of emotion, top shelf brawling, great throwbacks to the ROH matches and the single most convincing finish to an I Quit match pretty well ever.

(This ended with Jacobs using his railroad spike to stab Whitmer in the groin area repeatedly.)

Having King on commentary made it that much better, since it's exactly the sort of heated brawl that he'd work in the same situation and he manages to add that little extra touch with his commentary here, playing up that he's friends with both and concerned that they will literally murder one another in the ring. He knows exactly when to shut up as well, so yeah...a million billion stars for all of this.

(This is still possibly my indy match of the year so far.)

ROH: Take No Prisoners

I was bored and saw that the replay was on. I vaguely remember this being the show that Kingston debuted on, so I decided to order it. Sadly, King is edited out, but yeah...this is the first ROH I've watched in close to a year and I have to admit that I was kinda surprised as to how much I enjoyed the show. First half was so so, but the two matches that needed to carry the show did so in a big way.

-Claudio vs. Tyler Black vs Delirious vs. Shiozaki was decent, but I'll probably never get over my bias against the multi-man match. Lots of situations here that didn't make a ton of sense and had me rolling my eyes. Realistically, though, there's no way around it if you're going to book 4 guys in the same match. Some fun stuff with Claudio and Delirious, but not a match I'd go out of my way to watch again.

-Steen vs. Roddy is next. Pretty much what you'd expect from these two. Steen is such a great meatball dickhead. Roddy is generic as ever. But, uhh...he hits hard or something, so a lot of people dig him. Gotta love Steen..."WHO WANTS TO SEE HIM DIE!"

-Necro/Matthews vs. Briscoes earns a great big meh. Mark certainly does have a death wish, doesn't he. He bleeds quite the gusher here. Necro is probably the best brawler in the world right now, but this wasn't a good brawl. At all. I guess it was fun for the stunt show, watching dudes land on their head, unprotected chairshot crowd, but there was little flow and absolutely zero drama at all. So, the standard Briscoes match, I guess.

-Hangmen 3 get brought into the SnS fold. *yawn* Leads to Erick Stevens showing how big a moron he is, getting in Sweeney's face while totally ignoring the 5 other guys in the ring. Unfortunately, it also leads to Stevens vs. Albright. This wasn't actively bad or anything, but I almost fell asleep watching it. It was short, though, so props to ROH for at least making the crap easier to swallow.

-Pretty much loved the Davey/Romero vs Jig/Ruckus match. Really fun little tag sprint with a FANTASTIC crowd. It's saying something that I liked this, since Jig is the only one of the four that I can usually even stand. There were definitely some awkward moments, but the pace never slowed down and by the time you could dwell on something negative, they'd run through five other big spots. Not the style for everyone, but I personally find this sort of match fun from time to time. Jig looks pretty ridiculous sans mask and hell...even the name is meaningless at this point.

-I've always wondered what people saw in Austin Aries. Said time and time again that I just didn't "get" him. This might be the match that puts me on the path to being a fan. He and Danielson are absolutely fantastic here. Lots of really nifty matwork (with consequence) and even the lame headscissors sequence was palatable here.

-Main event is pretty great as well. Nigel had gotten pretty annoying when I was last watching ROH, but the heel turn definitely freshened him up and even the Lariat showcase we get here worked in context of the match. Crowd was going insane for Tyler's hope spots and Nigel was great in knowing exactly when to stuff his offense and take back control of the match. This is the first I've seen of the London Dungeon and the one at the end of the match looked absolutely sick. The arm really shouldn't bend in that particular direction. Was Tyler the first guy to kick out of the Jawbreaker? Half the crowd creamed themselves at that point.

Random mini-reviews

2008-08-23T23:06:00.002-05:00

It's been ages since someone bothered to update our fair blog. Because we're all far too ~~busy~~ lazy to be bothered with such things. It just occurred to me that I still post about stuff on various boards, though, so I might as well co-opt that junk and put it up hear since I'm sure it'll be new to some of you. If, uhh...anyone still remembers that we exist, anyway. This will have a bunch of out of context comments that you won't get and sometimes I'm just slicing bits of separate posts together to (hopefully) make sense, but when has my writing ever made sense, really? I did clean these up a bit and added some new comments. DIRECTOR'S CUT!

-I watched the rest of the King/Hero feud comp, including the Loser Leaves CZW match. God, what a match. It's been 24 hours and I don't know that I can put my feelings about the match into words. I routinely complain that I wouldn't put any match from the last 10 years in a list of my all time favorites, but this...this match is just different from everything else out there right now. It's as perfect a brawl as I've ever seen. Kingston is so far ahead of pretty much every other worker out there that it boggles the mind. From the half staggered selling to the timing of the fighting spirit spots to the way he shit talks his way through matches...just amazing. The dude just has a ton of heart and works emotion into wrestling in a way that I don't think I've ever seen. In this feud especially, Hero knows exactly when to be "Hero-y" and when to just sit back and throw strikes. He's such a smarmy, condescending ass in the ring and when he reigns himself in it comes across even more because of the cocky little stomps and whatnot. And then when he does one of his goofy tumbling routines it just makes you want to kill him.

This match (and much of the feud) is more a battle of wills than it is wrestling. I actually feel bad for the people who would look at this and just dismiss it as two guys trading strikes, since that's like 85% of this match. The art of simplicity has been lost for the most part, but damn, this match has it in spades. Can't stress enough how great this is. Actually, I'll probably watch it again tonight if I have time, back to back with the TPI match. Perhaps at that point, I'll be better able to articulate why it's the best match I've seen in years.

-Just re-watched the big Duggan/DiBiase stips (No DQ, Loser Leaves Town, Coal Miner's Glove on a Pole, Tuxedo Cage match ) from 3/22/85 for probably the fifth time. I own this match already, but this is a HUGE step up in VQ.

At any rate, if you've never seen this match, you have no idea what you're missing. The booking is completely logical and a great example of the multi-layered booking that Watts was capable of (oh wait...that's another one of those concepts that Heyman invented, right?). Every stipulation is there for a very specific reason and actually has history behind it. It 's not just a case of throwing crap at a wall and hoping it sticks. Beyond that, it's also a *fantastic* brawl. Both guys pound the crap out of one another. Great punches. Tons o'blood. You just can't ask for more out of a pro wrestling match than this. Seeing it in this quality makes me wonder if it might not actually outpace my holy grail of the Tully/Magnum I-Quit cage match.

Note: This got the #1 slot on my Mid-South ballot, which is exactly where it finished in the final tally, I believe. I'll post my entire ballot here so we can all laugh at how retarded I am!

-It's not often that I feel the need to stop watching something so I can post about it, but I'm watching CHIKARA's YLC V, N2 right now and just got through the Shayne Hawke/Tim Donst match, which is *fantastic*. I hadn't been sold on Hawke, but he rules it here, absolutely brutalizing Donst and being the biggest dick in the world in the process. Which, considering the fact that he's a fairly tiny albino dude is actually pretty odd. Heh. I was feeling bad for Donst after a while, because Hawke was just kicking the crap out of him and talking crap the entire time. Some great heel shtick here.

Donst got in very little offense, but his hope spots looked great as well. There was an amateur style facefirst legsweep in particular that looked 27 kinds of hurty. He looks like he'll be pretty decent with a bit more experience (Quack points out that, at this point, he's only worked a half dozen matches total). Not a high end match by any means, but damn, this is the sort of thing that reminds me why I love wrestling in the first place.

-For years, I'd been reading about the DiBiase/Flair match from Mid South. 11/6/85 is the date, I believe. Heard it was a great match attached to one of the best angles ever televised. I'd never seen it, until today. Been saying it a lot recently, but words fail to describe how great the entire setup of this is. I'll give you the basic rundown, but yeah...you need to see this for yourself. DiBiase (Maybe *the* heel in Mid South) gets a shot at Flair because Flair/Dick Slater killified Butch Reed the prior week and he's unable to wrestle.

Dick Murdoch (a face, in as much a redneck asskicker can be) comes out and cites the history between he and DiBiase, letting us know that he helped break Teddy into the business. He wants DiBiase to step down and give Murdoch the title shot. DiBiase refuses, so Murdoch attacks and just brutalizes him. DiBiase is just *gushing* blood. Flair gives himself the night off and we go to break assuming that the title match is off. Back from break and Bill Watts tells us that DiBiase is demanding to wrestle. Watts goes into full bore "walking tall" mode, telling us how much DiBiase is risking by wrestling and letting us know that children and anyone with a weak stomach should skip the match.

Flair and DiBiase proceed to work a short, but great match based around DiBiase's cut. Lots of little hope spots by Teddy and the crowd has gotten behind him 100%, which would have been a ridiculous notion just a half hour earlier. Flair ends up sending him over the top and DiBiase takes a nasty bump to the floor and into the barricade at ringside, getting counted out. Murdoch is back out to attack DiBiase once again and ends up just murdering him with a sick brainbuster on the floor. Watts cancels all of the standby matches and we stick with DiBiase as he's tended to. Steve Williams brings out a table that they use for a makeshift stretcher to load him into an ambulance. In the course of the show, you have DiBiase becoming the biggest face in the company and Murdoch (re)embracing the dark side and it's all absolutely spot on perfect.

Thank god for the 80's Watts set, as it's totally reminded me why I love pro wrestling. It's not even like I was souring on the business, but when you're watching stuff this great, it completely reinvigorates you. At the moment, I'm digging wrestling even more than usual, if that's even possible.

-For years, I'd been reading about the DiBiase/Flair match from Mid South. 11/6/85 is the date, I believe. Heard it was a great match attached to one of the best angles ever televised. I'd never seen it, until today. Been saying it a lot recently, but words fail to describe how great the entire setup of this is. I'll give you the basic rundown, but yeah...you need to see this for yourself. DiBiase (Maybe *the* heel in Mid South) gets a shot at Flair because Flair/Dick Slater killified Butch Reed the prior week and he's unable to wrestle.

Dick Murdoch (a face, in as much a redneck asskicker can be) comes out and cites the history between he and DiBiase, letting us know that he helped break Teddy into the business. He wants DiBiase to step down and give Murdoch the title shot. DiBiase refuses, so Murdoch attacks and just brutalizes him. DiBiase is just *gushing* blood. Flair gives himself the night off and we go to break assuming that the title match is off. Back from break and Bill Watts tells us that DiBiase is demanding to wrestle. Watts goes into full bore "walking tall" mode, telling us how much DiBiase is risking by wrestling and letting us know that children and anyone with a weak stomach should skip the match.

Flair and DiBiase proceed to work a short, but great match based around DiBiase's cut. Lots of little hope spots by Teddy and the crowd has gotten behind him 100%, which would have been a ridiculous notion just a half hour earlier. Flair ends up sending him over the top and DiBiase takes a nasty bump to the floor and into the barricade at ringside, getting counted out. Murdoch is back out to attack DiBiase once again and ends up just murdering him with a sick brainbuster on the floor. Watts cancels all of the standby matches and we stick with DiBiase as he's tended to. Steve Williams brings out a table that they use for a makeshift stretcher to load him into an ambulance. In the course of the show, you have DiBiase becoming the biggest face in the company and Murdoch (re)embracing the dark side and it's all absolutely spot on perfect.

Thank god for the 80's Watts set, as it's totally reminded me why I love pro wrestling. It's not even like I was souring on the business, but when you're watching stuff this great, it completely reinvigorates you. At the moment, I'm digging wrestling even more than usual, if that's even possible.

Note: This was #3 on my ballot. Could have easily been #1.

CHIKARA - Maximum Overdraft

-Mantis teams with the Southern Saints? In the pre-show? Okay then! His continued refusal to work with Moscow is as humorous as ever.

-King beats the snot out of Ricochet, then puts a 'Wicked mask on him and beats the snot out of him some more. Dig it. (Note: How can you possibly not like Eddie Kingston? It just seems like a virtual impossibility. Everything the man touches, or punches in the face, turns to gold.)

-I'm officially 100% on the Shayne Hawke bandwagon. He does my name proud...even if he spells it wrong. Anyway, he's goofy in that way that most Canadian indy guys tend to be, but he can also buckle down and dick it up with the best of them. I'm starting to dig Billy Roc a bit as well. He's sort of "face Hero"-lite, but yeah...if there's not at least one masturbatory matwork guy in the indies, the entire scene would implode.

-Death Rey vs. Haze 2/3 was a bit...sloppy. Wasn't a bad match or anything, but I was surprised at how off some of this looked since these two tend to work pretty well together.

-Deliriousos vs Colony was your standard, goofy CHIKARA fun. After going through the old Watts stuff, though, it was quite the mindfuck.

-The Minis match sucked. A lot. The commentary was far more entertaining than the match could have ever hoped to be.

-Chucky T/Drake Younger was pretty good. I'm starting to genuinely enjoy Chuck Taylor's work instead of having it be a bridge between segments of him doing his shtick. (Note: Not that the grenade elbowdrop isn't funny EVERY SINGLE TIME or anything)

-Ahhh...Lince Dorado. How far down my throat will you be pushed? (Note: This is as true today as it was when originally written. Of course, King is doing his best to murder him now, so soon my life will be Lince free.)

-Quack drags a watchable match out of Rocky Romero. Who knew? (Note: I hate Rocky Romero, if you weren't aware. How does this guy get so much hype?)

-I don't really remember how it was taken at the time, but damn, was that F.I.S.T./Briscoes match ever a good Briscoes match. I don't know if they toned it down because it wasn't an ROH/NOAH show or if Icarus is just way better than anyone gives him credit for (he is, actually, but I digress), but this match actually had a bit of structure and wasn't just the Briscoes flying through a zillion spots a minute. I wish they always worked like this.

(Note: This still stands. I hated the Briscoes for ages, then fell in love with them for a bit. Now I'm pretty much ambivalent. Every single match is exactly the same. Just mindless spot fu with no rhyme or reason. Which is sad, because they *can* work a different style when the mood strikes them)

-F.I.S.T. teases dissension postmatch. I don't remember them splitting at all, so color me confused... (Note: I was pretty far behind on CHIKARA at this point, so I was confused by things I half remembered from reading results, as compared to what I was seeing on the shows themselves. The moral? Spoilers suck.)

Also watched International Invaders Night 1. Came across to me as a weak show, but I was pretty exhausted when I watched it, so who knows? It *was* the birth of Brodie Lee: KILLING MACHINE, though, so huzzah to that. Ricochet/Pac was just as bad as I thought it would be when it was announced, even though people were trying to convince me that Ricochet was awesome now. Didn't buy it then...not buying it now. The F.I.S.T/Ice Creams match was pretty good, but that was the only match here I can see warranting a second viewing.

More to come!

Video Vault 25: To Be The Man...

2008-04-01T23:45:00.003-05:00

I figure that someone should probably mention something about Ric Flair retiring. I'll admit it, I was practically in tears during his HoF speech and again at Raw. Haven't seen 'Mania yet, but I'm sure that'll have the same effect. I can't even begin to tell you what Ric Flair has meant to me as a fan of pro wrestling. I've been watching him since I was maybe five or six years old, so he's been a fixture of my entire life. Can't even imagine the wrestling business without him. At any rate, enjoy some stuff from various points in his career. Just doing this really quickly on a whim, so expect me to go back sometime this week and add more posts with even more matches, angles and promos. It's amazing how much of his work is available online. And rightfully so...

Ric Flair vs. Kerry Von Erich (WCCW -12.25.82)
Wargames '87 (NWA - Great American Bash 1987)

Ric Flair v. Vader (WCW - Starrcade '93)
Part One
Part Two

Ric Flair v. Eddy Guerrero (Nitro - 12.18.95)
Ric Flair & Arn Anderson v. Rock n' Roll Express (Nitro - 6.3.96)

Random promos:

Late 70s
"Reeking of sex appeal"
Blackjack Mulligan Returns!
"Stylin' & Profilin'"
w/ Baby Doll
Re:Nikita Koloff
Training Bra promo

UWF - The week at a glance (Jan. 8 - Jan. 12, 2008)

2008-01-15T00:48:00.000-05:00

Well, the first week of the sublime UWF show on ESPN Classic has come and gone (and by gone, I mean that this week’s shows start in less than an hour and a half as I type this. Procrastination!). I was originally planning to recap individual episodes, but that seems like it would lead to some sort of head explodey, so we’ll just cover an entire week at a time with whatever notes I bother to take while watching the show live. Should allow me to hold onto what little sanity I have left.

-First thing I have to point out is Bruno Sammartino on commentary. He could care less about any of this and goes out of his way to disagree with Herb Abrams any time he can. Abrams, of course, was insane. His commentary fully bears that out.

-The wrestling is…okay. Or okay-ish, anyway. Mostly squash matches where the job guys get in more offense than you’d really want to see. The main events tend to be decent, if not poorly booked.

-Apparently, Gary Keyes nailed Billy Jack Haynes’ wife, because one doesn’t typically open a match with a shoot-looking German suplex in most matches. Especially in 1990. Heh. He then proceeded to lay in quite the beatdown.

-Fun fact (via Abrams): "Kids love Mr. Wonderful. Girls love Mr. Wonderful. America loves Mr. Wonderful!" Who knew?

-It’s always nice to see Steve Williams kicking the shit out of people. Wonder what Meltz did to piss Abrams off?

-I marked out huge for Col. DeBeers. I have no idea why. About the only notable thing I can recall him ever doing was the feud with Snuka. I was hoping for the face first piledriver here, but got screwed over on that.

-The Cactus Jack/David Sammartino match was pretty good. It’s always cool to watch Jack at this point, where he could still move around really well. All appendages accounted for as well! He also breaks out his “I’d rather hurt a man than love a woman” line in the inset promo. Crowd digs him. Probably because he’s busting his ass while everyone else is just sitting there working a chinlock for ten minutes. No ricockulous bumps, which mildly surprised me. And yeah…if you were wondering, David Sammartino still sucks.

- Was that promo by B. Brian Blair possibly the most painful thing to watch in the history of televised wrestling? Seriously…never speak again. No wonder Iron Sheik wants to humble him.

-Abram-ism alert! Regarding Blair: “…a fan favorite…a favorite of the fans!” Heh.

-The Blair/Dan Spivey match wasn’t something that I’d want to see again, but in terms of the wrestling that we’re getting on these shows, it wasn’t all that bad. Disregarding the lame non-finish leading to an even lamer pull apart brawl, I guess.

-Holy shit! The Nightstalker (Brian Clarke) is on my television! And yes, he has the axe! Other than the brutal match with Sid on one of the Clash shows, I don’t know that I’ve ever seen him work under this gimmick. I should probably not share this memory because it will (and probably should) lead to mockery, but when I was in…7th maybe 8th grade, I had an English assignment where I had to write a poem about my biggest hobby. Said poem contained what was probably a brilliant rhyme involving, “The mighty Nightstalker.” What the bloody hell could I have rhymed with Nightstalker? Anyway, I’m glad that no one reads these things. My lame childhood memories are safe!

-Jeff Husker wears a Nebraska football helmet to the ring. That’s meta! He works a guy named Helmut Hessler, who seems to be a shaggy blonde German dude wearing amateur headgear. That’s an interesting gimmick, I guess.

-Just to show that John Tolos is just as dumb as Abrams, we get this gem: "Universal Wrestling is the best Universal Wrestling Federation in the entire world.” Well okay then! I wonder what the best Universal Wrestling in the entire *universe* would be? It boggles the mind!

-Jimmy Valiant just kissed a fat chick in the crowd and knocked her down in the process. God, I love this shit! Also, he’s shocked and/or appalled that his former protégé, Colonel RED, joined the Russians. Who could have ever seen that one coming?

-I used to read about Wet n’ Wild in the Apter mags and really wanted to see them. Now I have. The 16 year wait wasn’t really worth it. They were sufficient in a seventh rate Rockers sort of way, but really, is that what you want to put on a resume?

-Bob Orton closes the show with a promo, referencing his twelve year old son. I wonder what ever happened to that kid?

-DeBeers won’t wrestle because the ref is black. Controversial! So does that make his beatdown of said ref at the end of the match a hate crime? Someone needs to look into this.

-I wonder if Lou Albano is clinically insane or if he‘s on THE DRUGS. I mean, he always pretty much just spouted gibberish, but his interview with Bob Orton is practically surreal. He just randomly disappears out of frame for like 15 seconds before popping back into the scene. Orton looks quite confused. Also, bored.

-Herb Abrams saw Jay Strongbow’s teepee! Tremendous!

-Orndorff vs. Dr. Death was actually worth staying up for. Really fun match with both guys kicking the crap out of one another. This one is actually worth tracking down, as I’m sure some brave soul is uploading this shit on a video site near you!

-Don Muraco! This episode is already a winner!

-I fell asleep after this and apparently missed a Louie Spicolli appearance. That sucks. A lot. I missed other stuff, too, but who gives a crap about that?

-Oh! This show is being taped outside of the friggin’ Nickelodeon section of Universal Studios. Take that, TNA! If someone gets slimed, this is the greatest show in the history of ever.

-The Blackhearts had a great look. Luna is scary as ever. I’m surprised this gimmick never went anywhere. They were pretty decent in the ring as well. I question why they decide to hit their finisher (Veg-O-Matic) on the guy who must have weighed 400+, though.

-I was entirely unaware that Cpl. Kirschner worked in UWF. He looked quite a bit smaller. I have nothing else to say!

-It’s Brady Boone! But not as Battle Kat. We get “The Lynx,” instead. Oh, Brady…what sneaky, sneaky guy you are. I bet no one in the WWF even noticed what you did there! At any rate, he’s actually athletic, so this is a bit faster paced, if not good or anything. I think his opponent (Mr. V) used to be a job guy in WCW. He’s obviously got star power!

-This 6-man tag is quite the random little cluster. But we get a Boris Zhukov sighting, so thumbs up to that. His cranium? Still MASSIVE. Nice to see Bam Bam Bigelow as well. He didn’t do much here, though.

-Lou Albano must have been doing lines DURING THE SHOW. I’ve literally never heard such a random bit of commentary in 20+ years as a fan. What a nutty guy.

-The Orton/Blair match seemed like it would be the best match of the entire week, but then they went and just ridiculously overbooked the finish. It was like watching TNA, actually.

-David Sammartino’s promo is grand. He’s not the biggest guy out there, but he *is* the most fit. Also, he’s dangerous…but only when provoked. QUALITY.

-He wrestles Ivan Koloff to close out the week and they have a decent little match. Dumb finish, of course. Watch as the referee pauses his count so that Sammartino can come back in, then quickly counts Ivan out. I think someone needs to embrace his Communist masters.

See you in seven with more goofy Abrams fun!

Friday Night SmackDown! 1/4/2008: For and Against

2008-01-09T23:55:00.000-05:00

AGAINST: Vickie with a mic.

FOR: Beat The Clock!

FOR: Coach climbing up on the announce table to salute the fans. That's a JBL move.

FOR: Is Finlay a face now or something?

FOR: Coach pointing out that Finlay's style isn't designed for speed.

FOR: Was that a real-time edit?

AGAINST: Eight minutes already? This is a bad time.

AGAINST: The double shillelagh swerve does get old.

AGAINST: Vince?

AGAINST: The hell was the point of that?

FOR: HBK in the Rumble commercial.

FOR: Michelle's pants.

AGAINST: Has Kenny missed two spots for interference already?

AGAINST: Coach doesn't think Victoria's utterly insane?

FOR: Was that an attempt at a Rocket Launcher? Ambitious if nothing else.

FOR: Nice kick by Michelle.

AGAINST: And Chavo weighs in but doesn't really.

AGAINST: Funaki?

FOR: Chavo's getting pissed.

FOR: Coach isn't doing a bad job.

FOR: Chavo countering Funaki's rollup attempt from the corner.

FOR: Whoa! 6:02.

FOR: Figured Batista'd get either Hawkins or Ryder.

AGAINST: Shouldn't he have his own tights by now?

FOR: Vickie making Teddy do her dirty work.

AGAINST: Same for Zack.

AGAINST: What happens if Ryder or Hawkins wins?

FOR: Coach wondering if Ryder and Hawkins were also told not to win in less than 6:02.

AGAINST: Pin him, Dave!

FOR: Cowboys vs greasers. Awesome.

FOR: Cherry in red, obv. (It seems too easy, doesn't it?)

FOR: Yang helping Cherry up and Domino overreacting to it.

AGAINST: See, I'd have brought Taker out second here.

FOR: The one kid's legitimately terrified.

AGAINST: Striker's the ref? Oh no.

FOR: Well, this is a little better than what I was expecting. (Big Daddy V)

AGAINST: Cole calling Vickie's management skills "unorthodox."

FOR: I wasn't expecting Striker to count at all.

FOR: Chavo was in this for a reason.

AGAINST: The hell? EDGE?

FOR: Rey throwing up his hands after Edge exits the ring.

FOR: Batista running interference on Ryder and Hawkins.

FOR: Taker's pull with the power company, apparently.

SNME times two!

2008-01-09T19:50:00.000-05:00

More bite-sized recappery follows!

SNME #27 (7/90)

We've started getting into the heavily "themed" SNME episodes, which are hilarious for all the wrong reasons. I love how all of the promos through the night tie into the theme, which leads to some really awkward moments. This one is the "Wild Kingdom" episode, where Alfred Hayes and Gene Okerlund go on an "African Safari" and bump into various wrestlers being goofy. Gotta love the announcers randomly stumbling across the Bushwackers, for example, strutting down a set of train tracks as if it's the most natural place in the world for them to pop up. This is far funnier (mostly unintentionally) than it sounds, if you've never seen it.

-Warrior vs. Rude is the opening match. This feud goes to show how great Rude was, because this was a really enjoyable match, even though Warrior did next to nothing, except run around like a lunatic. There's a stretch! Heenan took more bumps than he did, actually. There was one truly bizarre bit that I don't recall ever seeing before in wrestling. Rude locked Warrior in a sleeper and instead of doing the usual triple arm drop thing to see if he was conscious, the ref checked his leg instead. Even Jesse Ventura on commentary was confused by that.

-They run a Hogan "tribute" video with an orchestral version of Real American that I have to track down online, if possible. This is his first appearance after Earthquake squashed him on the Brother Love show, so the video was really pushing a possible retirement. It ends with an absurdly melodramatic shot of an empty locker with all of Hogan's gear in it. Cheesy, but well produced.

-Demos versus Rockers was really good. Could have done without Crush stinking up my world, but he actually wasn't too bad here. Michaels, by this point, is really starting to break out. In hindsight, it's easy to see that being in a team was anchoring him down. I guess I'm guilty of a bit of hyperbole there. It's not like Janetty was some great albatross keeping him from the spotlight. Had they given him the hard HBK push here I don't know that it would have gone over, but you tell that he's almost at that spot.

-Hennig/Santana was awesome. Hennig's bumping in this match is ridiculous even for him. Santana would pretty much just look at him and he'd take his exaggerated backflip bump and land on his head. Tito is one of the lost great workers of the 80s for the WWF. People have really forgotten how good he was back in the day. He didn't get to show it much by this point, but he could definitely still go. This was given a bit more time than you'd usually get out of SNME matches, so both guys got to get in a good amount of offense. The ref is bumped and Tito gets two visual falls and a submission while he's down, so they really protected him here. Crowd went bonkers for it as well. When Perfect squeaked out with a quick (but clean) rollup win, the crowd lost it. Great bit of storytelling and a good example of what a hot crowd adds to the viewer at home.

-Final match is Kerry Von Erich's debut versus Buddy Rose. Rose was always fat, but he's just ridiculous looking here. Practically round. This is pre-Blow Away diet, since it's not mentioned at all. Tornado looked pretty good, but Rose bumped around like a freak for him so even if he was in zombie mode this would have been okay. I've been watching a bunch of post-accident KVE recently and I always find it amazing that, for the most part, it was impossible to tell that he was wrestling on a prosthetic foot. He's a bit ginger on it from time to time, but it's mostly unnoticeable 95% of the time.

Overall, this was one of the better SNME shows from top to bottom. Let's just say that when I got the full run, I discovered quickly that I remembered them far more fondly than I should have. There's usually at least one good match/angle per show, but there's a whole lot of filler as well. Nothing here made me want to shut off the DVD, which is several steps up from the last few episodes that I've watched.

SNME #28 (10/90)

This is the Oktoberfest episode. Oy. Someone was on some good drugs when they came up with the idea for these themed shows. I think this is the last of them, though. Basically, everyone who isn't involved in a match is dressed in their Bavarian finest and partying their hearts out. It's Genius, Akeem/Slick, Bushwackers, Hart Foundation, Orient Express/Fuji, Duggan, Okerlund and Al Hayes (who is hilarious here, as he misses all of his cues because he's getting "drunk" during the course of the show).

-Road Warriors & Warrior vs Demolition was a dream match to me when I was 13, but yeah...it didn't age well at all. They basically bury Demolition here. LOD weren't even involved all that much. They really FUBAR'ed that feud big time. I know you can't just abandon the Harts at this point, but having them in the mix totally blew what could and should have beenone of the bigger feuds of the early 90s. The prematch interview with Warrior/LOD is hall of fame worthy, though, as they try to work in all the lame Oktoberfest references. It ends with Warrior popping up out of nowhere and screaming BLITZKRIEG over and over. Ah...crazy people. Gotta love 'em.

-Savage vs Dusty was just there to further the angle with DiBiase and Rhodes. Dustin is involved here, as DiBiase buys out the entire front row during the match, but Dustin won't sell out! The drama! This ends with Dustin taking one hell of an ass kicking by 1990 WWF standards, including doing a really rare blade job after DiBiase whacks him with a wooden chair. Dusty is great in these angles, of course, as he lays across Dustin to shield him and is just screaming "No!" over and over again as Dustin is laying there unconscious.

-Hogan/Tugboat vs Rhythm & Blues was pretty much what you'd expect. Hot crowd helped cover some atrocious wrestling. 'Quake and Bravo eventually get involved. Tugboat goes down after one weak guitar shot. It then takes five guys to subdue Hogan. Heh. 'Quake is about to hit his finisher, but Tugger makes the save.

-Slaughter squashes Koko. Not good at all. This angle was truly tasteless, which isn't something that I find myself saying about wrestling all that often. I'm not one of those thin skinned people who take offense to everything out there, but this was pretty low. I remember the Iraq stuff being much more tame than it actually started out as. Postmatch, they hype the upcoming Slaughter/Volkoff feud. Joy.

-Tornado versus Haku would have been a fun match, had it gone over three minutes. Even ignoring all of the stories you hear about Haku that show how much of a total badass he is, it's pretty easy to tell just by watching him work. The guy was a beast when they let him. I'm surprised that he was never a bigger star in the WWF during this time period.

-I failed to mention the skits throughout the show. We get the Bushwackers at a cheese factory, just so they can do 25 bad "cut the cheese" puns in two minutes. There was also a sausage stuffing contest (at which point Genius was referred to as the "Master sausage stuffer." I'm surprised they didn't work in a Pat Patterson joke in there somewhere!), which I'm sure Bret fondly remembers as one of his finest wrestling moments. This eventually leads to a food fight with everyone, of course. If nothing else, it looks like everyone was having a blast, even doing retarded shit like this.

Overall, this was several steps down from the prior episode. The angle with Dustin was cool, but everything else is skippable, unless you're specifically looking for the inspired random goofiness that 1990 WWF serves up in spades...

Best of 2007 - The Ballot, Part 2

2008-01-06T00:32:00.000-05:00

And since I actually vote in the Observer awards, and did this last year, and still having posting privileges...

I'll expound upon views where they're significantly different from Shane's or common sense, and I'll go deeper on the ballot when I feel like it. I do watch MMA, so I vote on those too. I watch WWE, TNA, and ROH at least somewhat regularly, and CHIKARA, PWG, puro, and lucha when recommended.

LOU THESZ/RIC FLAIR AWARD

1.) John Cena
2.) Shawn Michaels
3.) Hiroshi Tanahashi

Man, this was tough to vote for this year. Had the MMA and wrestling not been split, I almost certainly would've had Rampage and Couture in this mix. As it is, Cena was tremendous and on top of the WWE A-brand almost the entire voting period. Michaels was phenomenal but missed a lot of time. Tanahashi was the Japan ace this year, although that's not saying much. Morishima had some fine work in the NOAH upper-mid and some fine work as ROH champion, but he really didn't draw a whole lot so I left him off.

MMA MOST VALUABLE FIGHTER

1.) Quinton Jackson
2.) Randy Couture
3.) Anderson Silva

Couture and Rampage are very close for 1/2, and I may have been swayed by Randy's end of the year bullshit more then anything.

MOST OUTSTANDING WRESTLER

1.) Bryan Danielson
2.) John Cena
3.) Shawn Michaels

Danielson missed 5 months and still blew everyone but Cena away. He may actually be the best in the world at this point.

MOST OUTSTANDING FIGHTER

1.) Quinton Jackson
2.) Anderson Silva
3.) Randy Couture

BEST BOX OFFICE DRAW

1.) Chuck Liddell
2.) Mistico
3.) John Cena

Liddell had the Tito fight and the Rampage fight in the voting period, so this seems obvious. Mistico was still a super draw for at least the first half of the year. Cena carries WWE house shows.

FEUD OF THE YEAR

1.) John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels
2.) Vince McMahon vs. Donald Trump
3.) Bryan Danielson vs. Takeshi Morishima

TAG TEAM OF THE YEAR

1.) The Briscoes (Jay Briscoe and Mark Briscoe)
2.) The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin)
3.) Kevin Steen and El Generico

MOST IMPROVED

1.) MVP
2.) Candice Michelle
3.) Claudio Castagnoli

BEST ON INTERVIEWS

1.) Jimmy Jacobs
2.) Quinton Jackson
3.) Santino Marella

Watch the following five videos and tell me Jimmy Jacobs shouldn't win this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cul6TSWq4Gk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDp50GI5pnU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZv5aGlpYYI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x21MIfeGPOc

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3MKZiDO0nI (promo starts at about 3:45, but watch the entire thing)

His best promo isn't even among these, that's on the Supercard of Honor show. Rampage is Rampage. Santino started out as the worst talker ever and ended up as SANTINO~!

MOST CHARISMATIC

1.) Quinton Jackson
2.) John Cena
3.) Forrest Griffin

BEST TECHNICAL WRESTLER

1.) Bryan Danielson
2.) William Regal
3.) Yuji Nagata

BRUISER BRODY MEMORIAL AWARD

1.) Necro Butcher
2.) Umaga
3.) Takeshi Morishima

Necro is the death match king, the other two are more "stiff the crap out of guys" brawlers. But this is a catch-all award.

BEST FLYING WRESTLER

1.) Jack Evans
2.) AJ Styles
3.) Mistico

MOST OVERRATED

1.) The Great Khali
2.) Big Daddy V
3.) Snitsky

Three of the worst workers in the world. Three guys Vince McMahon pushes to the moon. It's not because they're big or anything. Really!

MOST UNDERRATED

1.) Jimmy Jacobs
2.) Alex Shelley
3.) Samoa Joe

This is a tough as fuck award, because guys in WWE don't get a chance to shine unless they're on top, so it's hard to say they're underrated. Jimmy Jacobs should probably be on top in ROH, and he probably will be fairly soon. Alex Shelley should be on top in TNA, and he's going to be lucky if he gets in the mid-card mix. Samoa Joe should be TNA's ace, and he's being criminally misused. There's many ways to be underrated.

PROMOTION OF THE YEAR

1.) UFC
2.) ROH
3.) NOAH

After the first two, what do you vote for? NOAH was down, CMLL was down...I almost voted for Dragon Gate, actually.

BEST WEEKLY TELEVISION SHOW

1.) The Ultimate Fighter
2.) Wrestling Society X
3.) Inside the UFC

How bad is it when two of the shows haven't even been on in many months and got no ratings?

PRO WRESTLING MATCH OF THE YEAR

1.) Jimmy Jacobs vs. BJ Whitmer, ROH Supercard of Honor II
2.) John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels, WWE RAW, 4/23
3.) Bryan Danielson vs. Takeshi Morishima, ROH Manhattan Mayhem II

On my top ten list, only 1 more is a WWE match.

MMA MATCH OF THE YEAR

1.) Randy Couture vs. Tim Sylvia, UFC 68
2.) Tyson Griffin vs. Frank Edgar, UFC 67
3.) Nick Diaz vs. Takanori Gomi, PRIDE 33: The Second Coming

You could go 20 deep here and not have a huge argument.

ROOKIE OF THE YEAR

1.) Erick Stevens
2.) Tim Donst
3.) Joe Doering

I have no idea how Erick Stevens is still eligible for this, but he is, and he's the best guy around. Santino's not, otherwise he'd have been 3. Lince Dorado was in the mix too.

BEST NON-WRESTLING PERFORMER

1.) Larry Sweeney
2.) Donald Trump
3.) Jim Cornette

BEST TELEVISION ANNOUNCER

1.) Jim Ross
2.) John Layfield
3.) Joe Rogan

WORST TELEVISION ANNOUNCER

1.) Mike Tenay
2.) Don West
3.) Todd Grisham

Tenay and West are like a parody of an announce team at this point, probably because TNA scripts everything. Grisham is horrible, but thankfully limited.

BEST MAJOR SHOW

1.) ROH Man Up
2.) PRIDE 33: The Second Coming
3.) UFC 76: Knockout

I urge everyone who hasn't seen Man Up yet to do so.

WORST MAJOR SHOW OF THE YEAR

1.) TNA Lockdown

BEST WRESTLING MANEUVER

1.) KENTA's Go 2 Sleep

I thought long and hard about Nigel's jawbreaker lariat, which I eliminated because it's actually hurting guys, and the CHIKARA Special, which I'm not sure is eligible because as I read it, it's a singular move by a singular person or team. So I went with the old standby.

MOST DISGUSTING PROMOTIONAL TACTIC

1.) WWE stages the death of Vince McMahon

I wanted to vote for something related to WWE's handling of the Benoit tragedy, but nothing in particular struck me as bad as this.

WORST TELEVISION SHOW

1.) TNA Impact

WORST MATCH OF THE YEAR

1.) James Storm vs. Chris Harris, TNA Lockdown

Has there ever been a good blindfold match? The really sad part is that these guys went out several other times and tore the house down. Fake Rosie vs. Fake Trump was up here too.

WORST FEUD OF THE YEAR

1.) Christy Hemme vs. Voodoo Kin Mafia

Not only was this atrocious (WHAT ABOUT CHYNA? WHAT ABOUT JOANIE LAURER?), it also went on forever. Do you realize that this feud went longer then the initial Kurt Angle/Samoa Joe feud? Only in TNA.

WORST PROMOTION

1.) TNA

Easiest pick ever.

BEST BOOKER

1.) Gabe Sapolsky

In some ways, the booking of ROH this year was superior to in past years.

PROMOTER OF THE YEAR

1.) Dana White

By default almost. UFC had a mediocre year, but everyone else had a horrible year. I guess Dorian Rolden (AAA) wouldn't have been a bad alternative.

BEST GIMMICK

1.) Santino Marella, heel version

Has there ever been a quicker turnaround on a guy? The original Santino was a bad indy guy doing a bad indy gimmick. He then turned into an okay worker doing an awesome, hilarious gimmick.

WORST GIMMICK

1.) Voodoo Kin Mafia

It seems so long ago because TNA does 2 years of angles per month, but most of their DX "feud" and the entire Hemme thing was in the voting period.

BEST WRESTLING BOOK

1.) A Lion's Tale by Chris Jericho

Read this!

BEST PRO WRESTLING DVD

1.) Ric Flair and the Four Horsemen

Watch this!

Back in January 2009.

Best of 2007 - The Ballot!

2008-01-01T12:31:00.000-05:00

It's a new year. Hooray, I guess! Allow me to offer up the ballot that I'd send to one Dave Meltzer if I were still an Observer subscriber. Because dwelling in the past is so much cooler than looking on to 2008...

As always, my personal biases are heavy, but I'll at least try to justify why my opinion is pretty much the only opinion worth having. Heh.

P.S. I watched a *lot* more stuff from Japan this year, which will actually be reflected in my picks.

P.P.S. I abstain from all shoot related questions. I only see what they air on television, so my voting would be really skewed and I'd look, perhaps, dumber than usual!

P.P.P.S. I use the Wrestling Observer categories, obviously, but I don't necessarily use Meltzer's criteria for the awards. I can name an indy as the promotion of the year because, essentially, I want to. Drawing power doesn't tie into my twisted little world view at all. Now then, on to the show...

Section A: Pick your TOP 3

1. Lou Thesz/Ric Flair Award(Wrestler of the Year)

a. John Cena
b. "American Dragon" Bryan Danielson
c. Hiroshi Tanahashi

As always, Meltzer's categories confuse me. I believe that this is the more general "MVP" sort of award, so that's how I'm voting. Like it or not, 2007 was Cena's year. He was just on fire in the ring, having good matches with just about everyone, even if they were complete sacks of crap. He's probably the most charismatic guy they've had since some dude named THE ROCK left for Hollywood. Danielson's return to ROH was great and he had amazing match after amazing match through the year. I think he may be one of the few guys out there that you might consider an "indy draw." Tanahashi was on top for the best 12 month period that New Japan has produced for a decade. He's got "it" in spades. Ten years from now, he might be the best worker on the planet. Hell...he might be top five right now.

2. Most Outstanding Wrestler

a. Bryan Danielson
b. Chris Hero
c. Matt Hardy

Again, Danielson in 2007 was money in the bank. Just stick him in the ring with whoever you want and you'll get an awesome match that people are clamoring to see. Hero has always been an amazing worker, but his run in ROH has given him a completely different dimension to lean on. Who knew that his heel shtick could ever be that effective? This was Hardy's breakout year. You just have to hope that WWE runs with the ball. He's a guy who could carry the company in the future. Not at an Austin/Rock level or anything because he just doesn't have the presence of those guys. But he can easily fill a Bret Hart sort of role as a more low key main eventer whose work in the ring provides the backbone that everything else is built around.

3. Best Box Office Draw

a. John Cena
b. N/A
c. N/A

Realistically, MMA guys belong here, but I don't feel comfortable in throwing names out there since I'm not really much more than a casual MMA fan. In terms of pro wrestling, it's Cena first and everyone else waaaaaaay down the list.

4. Feud Of The Year

a. Chris Hero vs. Eddie Kingston
b. Matt Hardy vs. MVP
c. Jimmy Jacobs vs. BJ Whitmer

There's a ton of honorable mentions here. It's been a good year of wrestling overall, since I can name probably 10 feuds that were actually hate filled and violent. Hero/King is on an entirely different level than anything else this year. It's the most obvious vote on the entire ballot for me.

5. Tag Team Of The Year

a. Jay & Mark Briscoe
b. Kevin Steen & El Generico
c. Motor City Machine Guns

It's pretty clearly been the Briscoe's year, as they just churned out good match after good match with a variety of opponents all over the world. Steen/Generico pushed them to a higher level, which in an era where tag wrestling is mostly dead is enough to get them the runner up slot. Sabin & Shelley are easily talented enough to win this award. Shame that they're stuck in TNA.

6. Most Improved

a. MVP
b. Tomko
c. Candice Michelle

When he started, I *hated* MVP. The gimmick was good from the start, but he was really bland in the ring. At this point, he's basically just exploded as a worker, to the point where he's one of the best in the company. Tomko was absolutely brutal to watch at times when he was in WWE. But going to Japan did him wonders. He's not great, but he's a really solid tag wrestler and he just continues to get better.

7. Best on Interviews

a. Eddie Kingston
b. Chuck Taylor
c. Christian Cage

King runs away with this. No one cuts a promo quite like he does. Amazing intensity/emotion and every word he says is absolutely believable. Chuck Taylor is more of a smartass, but he has that rare pro wrestling ability to actually be funny on purpose. Christian is pretty much literally the only reason to watch TNA. In a world of shit, everything he does smells like roses.

8. Most Charismatic

a. John Cena
b. Larry Sweeney
c. Christian Cage

This one pretty much speaks for itself. It's Cena by a mile. The other two are awesome, but really...it's just me filling out the spaces.

9. Best Technical Wrestler

a. Mike Quackenbush
b. Bryan Danielson
c. Claudio Castagnoli

This is a dead heat as far as I'm concerned. Just three amazing pro wrestlers. Every match they're involved in is sure to be awesome...

10. Bruiser Brody Memorial Award

a. Necro Butcher
b. Jimmy Jacobs
c. Togi Makabe

If you want to watch a great brawl, these are the guys that'll provide it. There's no one better than Necro out there right now in this respect. People who only see him as a deathmatch guy need to go out and actually watch some more of his work. He's BRILLIANT. Jacobs is like a pint sized killing machine. Seriously, a guy that small shouldn't be a top level brawler, but there he is. Makabe is the best heel in Japan. If you disagree. I'm sure he'll be happy to bludgeon you with his chain to prove the point.

11. Best Flying Wrestler

a. Pac
b. Jack Evans
c. Matt Sydal

Pac is just phenomenal. He hits pretty much everything and comes up with some ridiculous spots that simply boggle the mind. Evans is still great (he's improved a bunch over the past year, which goes far beyond being flippy), but I think this is the year that Pac passed him by. Sydal gets mentioned just because everything he does looks so smooth. He'd get the award for being the guy that makes everything he does look effortless.

12. Most Overrated
a. Kurt Angle
b. Austin Aries
c. Davey Richards

Has anyone fallen further than Kurt Angle over the past 3 years? God...there are times now when it doesn't even look like he should be in a ring. The other two are mostly just guys that I personally can't get into. Both of them seem to be IWC favorites, though, so they fit.

13. Most Underrated

a. Eddie Kingston
b. Hernandez
c. AJ Styles

Kingston should be the biggest star on the indies. That he's not even booked in ROH isn't a shame...it's a tragedy. Hernandez is just a BEAST (God knows I've said that enough over the past year). Easily the best power guy on the indy scene. Maybe in all of wrestling. As for Styles, everyone knows that he rules, but he's spent most of the year developing a personality and the IWC yokels seem to forgotten about him. I routinely see people crap on him these days because he's not pumping out great matches, ignoring that by building a persona, he's assuring himself a better position to...pump out great matches. Crazy! He certainly hasn't forgotten how to work, which seems to be the vibe you sometimes get from people. Of course, people are stupid.

14. Promotion Of The Year

a. WWE
b. CHIKARA
c. Ring of Honor

Been a really good year for WWE, wrestling-wise. Tons of quality matches and decent booking through the year. CHIKARA and ROH are the absolute cream of the indy crop.

15. Best Weekly TV Show

a. Smackdown
b. Raw
c. WSX

Yeah. Nothing else even rates here.

17. Worked Match of the Year

a. Chris Hero v. Eddie Kingston - Last Man Standing (IWA:MS - TPI '07, Night 2)
b. John Cena v. Umaga - Last Man Standing (Royal Rumble)
c. Hiroshi Tanahashi v. Hirooki Goto (NJPW - 11.11.07)

This was the year of the LMS match, apparently. Both of these were worked close to perfection. Hero/King just had a little more violence and a LOT more hate to put it over the top. The final choice is absolutely going to be seen as Tanahashi's coming out party someday. Great, great match.

19. Rookie Of The Year

a. Lince Dorado
b. Santino Marella
c. Tim Donst

I don't know..."rookie" is kind of a hazy term these days, since guys work shitty little indies that no one ever sees before getting a shot anywhere else. That said, I'm almost positive that Dorado & Donst are both true rookies. I know Santino has kicked around the developmentals, but yeah...we'll consider the new gimmick a reboot for him and count him. Not so much for his in ring work. He's just friggin' hilarious on the mic and some weeks he's the highlight of Raw for me.

20. Best Non-Wrestler Performer

a. Larry Sweeney (ROH)
b. William Regal
c. Coach

So, two of the names I chose are actually wrestlers who just aren't being used in the ring much, if at all right now. And I've been digging Coach for years. I can't even think of anyone else that I really like in a non-wrestling spot.

21. Best Television announcer

a. UltraMantis Black
b. Jim Ross
c. JBL

Sure, UMB technically isn't a television announcer, I guess. When I watch CHIKARA DVDs, though, they appear on my TV so he counts! I couldn't possibly go through an entire ballot without a mention of everyone's favorite vegan, insect menace! No one can set the stage and feed off of the emotion of a big match than JR. If he's announcing at 50%, he's still better than pretty much every announcer who's ever spoken into a mic, so there you go. Really...no explanation needed. I'll miss JBL on Smackdown. He really worked his character into the announce shtick and made it work better than anyone thought it could.

22. Worst Television Announcer

a. Mike Tenay
b. Mike Tenay
c. Mike Tenay

Egads! What the fuck happened to poor, creepy, child molester lookin' Mike Tenay? I'm voting for alien abduction, because there's just no way that this could possibly be the same Mike Tenay that actually, you know, knew stuff back in the day. He's turned into the world's worst post-1996 Tony Schiavone. People bitch about Don West, but at least he has an unintentional comedic quality. On another note, and this goes directly to TNA (who I'm sure are reading this!)...please keep Tenay off camera whenever possible. What a creepy old man he turned into.

23. Best Major Wrestling/MMA Show

a. IWA-MS: Ted Petty Invitational 2007
b. WWE: Wrestlemania 23
c. PWG: Giant-Size Annual #4

Lots of fun shows this year, but I think these are probably my favorites. TPI is two shows, of course, but I can add it because I'm cool like that. Haven't started watching the 2007 BoLA shows yet, or I'm sure that they'd be on here.

Catgeory B: Pick ONE for each of the following

1. Worst Major Show of the Year

Unforgiven was pretty bad. I can't really think of anything else specific off the top of my head.

2. Best Wrestling Maneuver

CHIKARA Special! Not only is it a nifty little move that doesn't take an hour to set up (or cause brain damage), but it ties into an entire year's worth of CHIKARA angles as well.

3. Most Disgusting Promotional Tactic

The (fake) Death of Vincent Kennedy McMahon. Or more so the mourning garbage afterwords, which was just incredibly tasteless, even for Vince McMahon.

4. Worst Television Show of the Year

iMPACT! By a mile. If you need more explanation, just watch the show. All will become apparent.

5. Worst Wrestling Match of the Year

I was going to ignore it because it was *meant* to be a total abortion of an angle, but yeah...when I thought about how much television time it was given, it's hard to not vote for the Rosie v. Trump "match" on Raw.

6. Worst Feud of the Year

Every feud Kurt Angle has had this year has been brutal to watch. I'll specificially narrow it to the feud with Samoa Joe, simply because that *should* have been awesome, but yeah...it was anything but.

7. Worst Promotion

I just can't think of anything from 2007 that disappointed me more than TNA. Technically, it's not bad (for the most part) once people are actually in the ring. But every other segment in every other show is horribly stupid, overbooked and just plain nonsensical.

8. Best Booker

ROH was pretty outstanding for the most part, but I'd actually say that their booking might be one of the weak points for me, so Gabe is out. I think I feel better about voting for Mike Quackenbush, actually. Or whoever it is that books CHIKARA, at any rate. The booking is far more subtle than you find elsewhere, but it all makes sense and they always have one overriding thread that weaves through every other angle during the course of a year.

9. Promoter Of The Year

This would be the one category where I'm comfortable in voting MMA, as Dana White (and UFC by proxy) really had one hell of a year.

10 Best Gimmick

The Age of the Fall. Said it before, but it started pretty cool with the message board stuff. Gabe made it friggin' retarded within 48 hours, but the sheer willpower of Jimmy Jacobs pulled it back from the brink. There's nothing "cooler" in pro wrestling right now and the debut is probably the top moment of the year for me.

11. Worst Gimmick

Black Reign has been pretty tremendously retarded and it seems to get dumber by the week. Poor Dustin.

12. Best Wrestling Book

A Lion's Tale: Around the World in Spandex - Chris Jericho

Great book. I don't know if I'd rate it beside Foley's first two, but it's certainly right on the top tier of books written by pro wrestlers. His passion for the business and sense of humor truly come across on the page. He seems like he'd be awesome to just sit down and have a conversation with.

13. Best DVD

The Horsemen DVD was pretty spectacular, if that fits into the 2007 timeframe. I don't really recall. When I get around to watching it, the World Class DVD will probably take this, though.

Other people should follow up and post one of these as well. Or at least comment and tell me why every selection I've made is wrong (or more likely, brilliant beyond words).

PWG - Giant-Size Annual #4 (7/29/07)

2007-12-31T23:03:00.000-05:00

So, I'm surprisingly *without* plans for New Year's Eve (which is the first time I've said that with a straight face in several years), so I figured I might as well post something here. If Matt has the time to bring SD back, then dammit...I can man up and actually get my lazy ass in gear for, I don't know...10 minutes or so. Anyway, after much consideration, I figured that I could do really capsulated recaps of the indy stuff I watch. It's how I post junk on other boards, so I might as well bring it here as well. We'll start off with a Pro Wrestling Guerrilla show, because that just happens to be the last show that I watched. Crazy how that works!

PWG is usually pretty hit or miss with me because I'm not all that big a fan of most of the "native" SoCal guys. I just can't get into the Quicksilver/Ronin/Excaliburs of the world. I don't know what it is, but I find myself being bored to tears by most of the PWG undercard stuff. This, however, was an outstanding show. Almost from top to bottom. Maybe the best PWG show I've ever seen, actually. I should also point out that wherever the building they're running is, it looks way better on camera than I've seen from past shows. I hope they stay here for a while.

-We open with Top Gun Talwar versus Ronin. See above about me not really liking the local SoCal crew. Both of these guys fit into that mold. There's nothing here that merits discussion. It was too short to really annoy, though, so it had that much going for it.

-I'm starting to "get" Human Tornado, I think. Actually, I think he's just improving as a worker. People always seem to have liked/talked about his shtick more than the in ring work. Now that that is starting to catch up, I like him so much more. The match with Tony Kozina here is a bit awkward at points (I'm not sure what that tornado DDT into the apron was *supposed* to be, but the end result looked gimped), but it was generally pretty okay and it did a good job furthering the angle with Candice. The postmatch stuff between the two was pretty funny, if you can ignore the vaguely creepy domestic violence part of the angle.

-This is my first look at the Young Bucks, who seem like a really fun team. I've seen them compared to the Rockers a lot and that seems apt. I really don't mind guys being spotty all that much, so long as they actually hit their spots. I didn't notice any problems here, so I'll have to track down more of their work. I continue to enjoy Karl "Machine Gun" Anderson as well. Bino Gambino, on the other hand, seemed to be, uh...not so good. First time I've seen him as well, though, so I don't have much to go on. He does take a hugely ridiculous back bump to the floor in this match, though, so at least he served a purpose.

At any rate, they worked a nice little match here, with the heels basically losing because The Dynasty (Scott Lost/Anderson) couldn't work well with Gambino. Basic story, but it worked because they stuck to it and didn't jump all over the place and try to thread five other stories in there as well.

-Davey Richards vs Fergal Devitt would have been much better had they chopped 5-10 minutes off of it. They totally burned out the crowd with the extended matwork. To be fair, though, everything was smooth and it all played into the finish. It's just not the match that these two guys needed to work at this point of the show. And that, folks, is about as much positivity as you're ever going to get from me, Re: Davey Richards.

-Scorpio Sky vs Joey Ryan is next. *yawn* This is possibly the slowest, tamest streetfight I've ever seen. Needed bucketloads of HATE to match the story. This was just...there. Really disappointing. Again, I guess this points to my general apathy towards the native PWG crew. Which is odd, since Joey Ryan is one of the guys that I do like a bunch.

-Austin Aries/Rocky Romero was decent enough, but let's face it...this match doesn't have a chance with me. I don't like either guy. Actually, I actively dislike both guys. I really, really wish someone would tell me what the world sees in Aries. I just don't get it at all. He completely ignores Romero's arm work here because it interferes with him hitting his own spots. There was so much potential with him when he returned to the indy scene. His ROH return was great. He showed amazing intensity and it looked like he was going to turn it up a notch after the Austin Starr debacle. Instead, it's the same old stale Aries. A great big meh to all of this.

-Am. Dragon/Necro has been a super dream match of mine and boy howdy, did it ever live up to standards. Too short to be considered a top tier match or anything, but these two bring the hate that Sky/Ryan should have x3. Necro is just so damn good and Dragon is perfect at playing to his strengths. I love how Necro gets really frustrated because Dragon is always a half step ahead, stuffing his striking and generally being able to cut him off from being Necro. They try to tear each others eyes/noses out and both guys get the hardway juice going. Necro even channels Terry Funk and tries to strangle Danielson with a plastic bag. Superb. I think my favorite part of the match is Danielson absolutely snapping at one point and winging chair after chair at Necro's head. Totally ties into the story of Danielson being frustrated at missing out on his title shot. Necro absolutely *eats* the MMA elbows as well.

It astounds me that there are people out there who still think this guy sucks. There's no accounting for taste, I guess.

-Stong/Pac vs. Steenerico was great. Well...great in the way that 2007 tag matches are worked, anyway. I've gotten used to the fact that this is what tag wrestling has become. If these Briscoe-nian sorts of matches annoy you, this one isn't going to change your mind. It's less nearfall happy than most of the Briscoes stuff, but it's still just four guys tearing through spots at high speed. Pac looks amazing in this one, though. He got real good, real quick. Steen makes a good surly, dickhead fat guy as always and Roderick largely stays out of the way. Can't ask for a hell of a lot more than that.

-Generico/Danielson is borderline MOTYC worthy. It's been a pretty outstanding year for high level matches, though, so it's no more than a low end contender. Just a great, great match. The crowd just eats this up, because it's full of emotion and both guys just throw bombs at one another trying to end it quickly. 2007 might be Generico's break out year. He's always been good but in 2006, I think he's turned the corner and started heading towards *great*.This is a must see show. There's a bit of a dead spot in the middle, but the last three matches are more than worth your time and money to catch. I'm totally geeked to start watching BoLA, just to see if they can continue building momentum. Seriously, if all of the recent PWG shows are like this, I think they're going to be bumped up to the "buy every show" level. Got this just because I needed to see Dragon/Necro, but I was so happy to see how the rest came out.

If you're interested...
http://www.stage6.com/user/XBooker/video/1999764/PWG---Giant-Size-Annual-4-pt1
http://www.stage6.com/user/XBooker/video/2000432/PWG---Giant-Size-Annual-4-pt2

In other news, ESPN Classic is going to start airing the old Herb Abrams UWF shows next week (@ 1AM) and I'm going to at least try to get some recaps of them up. Can't be more nonsensical than TNA these days, can it? I also want to recap every last second of the WSX DVD set that I haven't already covered. So maybe, just maybe we'll see regular content around these parts again. Until I get bored again, I guess. Maybe doing a regular update can be my resolution for 2008. Heh.

Friday Night SmackDown! 12/21/2007: For and Against

2007-12-27T00:41:00.000-05:00

FOR: Having time to do these again.

FOR: Edge as champ.

AGAINST: Wait, when did Teddy become Vickie's assistant? (Yes, I've been gone a while.)

FOR: There are still Edgeheads?

FOR: So they're not really the Major Brothers.

AGAINST: Is Curt Hawkins reciting his personal ad?

AGAINST: Mimosas, Hawkins? Really?

AGAINST: Is anybody buying Edge and Vickie as lovers? Anyone?

FOR: The unintentional comedy in this Edge-Vickie video is off the charts.

FOR: Teddy shaking his head.

FOR: Batista/Edge tonight?

AGAINST: Why is Singh out here with his shirt off?

FOR: Cole to JBL: "You're gonna miss me. You know it." JBL: "You miss things in many ways."

FOR: JBL on Khali: "What about this man is not big?" Cole: "Nothing, I guess. I don't know about all of it."

FOR: They're going Globetrotters on us.

FOR: GIANT SWING~~~~

FOR: The look on Khali's face afterwards.

FOR: Flair with a mic.

AGAINST: Maryse is still around?

AGAINST: Seriously, you could hide Striker in one of Big Daddy V's fat rolls.

FOR: Punk's counter-wrestling.

FOR: Striker shouting strategy from the corner.

FOR: Henry tagging in while MVP was in the 619 position. That needs to happen more often.

FOR: This match. (Shocking considering who was involved.)

FOR: Michelle's dress.

AGAINST: That's clearly some set backstage. No restaurant would put a pillar that big right in front of the entrance like that. Also, there appear to be no other tables.

AGAINST: Pretty sure the prices are right there on the list, Jamie.

AGAINST: Wait, those are dream sequence transitions, not elapsed-time transitions. Who edited this?

FOR: At least Noble wore a collared shirt.

FOR: Michelle going back to the bottle.

FOR: Michelle: "That's why I'm here."

FOR: I'm gonna be honest: I wasn't expecting the Italian restaurant swerve.

AGAINST: The tablecloth trick is about to backfire spectacularly.

FOR: Deuce makes that Santa coat/greaser leather jacket combo work. Oddly, I'm not sure Domino could.

FOR: What's in the bag, boys?

FOR: Festus as Pavlov's dog taken to the next level is borderline brilliant.

AGAINST: Cole: "He's strong as an ax!"

AGAINST: Shouldn't Cherry be wearing the Santa hat?

FOR: I think Festus did bite Deuce's fingers, Cole.

FOR: JBL: "I'm about to announce the biggest comeback since the Resurrection."

FOR: You don't often get two A+ promos on one show.

FOR: Tazz!

AGAINST: Three-on-one?

AGAINST: "Cloverfield" is a really bad title for the kind of movie it is.

AGAINST: Wait, what?

AGAINST: Changing the rules post-match? That's right out of the McMahon-Helmsley playbook. (Though I guess it has been seven years by the Jim Cornette angle recycling rule, so it's probably OK.)

AGAINST: Why are they cheering for Taker? He's not coming out here.

TNA iMPACT! (10.11.07)

2007-10-17T02:16:00.000-05:00

-Back with another week of TNA. We even have EXTRA CONTENT! as I recap the first run match from the Road to Bound For Glory show. Okay, that’ll probably take like two lines, but dammit, it took effort on my part. Appreciate me!

Roxxi Laveaux v. Ms. Brooks

-Here’s your extra content. Roxxi is pretty cute. She apparently has blue hair this week. This is all really basic and boring, though they’re both laying in the chops a bit harder than you’d think they would in a throwaway match that isn’t even being featured on the weekly show. Roode distracts Brooks, who gets planted with the Dominator, giving Roxxi the win. I have no idea if they have a gimmick name for it, but looking at the crew of chicks in TNA, I’m officially dubbing it the “Implant Smasher.” You see what I did there? God, am I ever clever!

-Angle arrives at the building wearing Sting’s son’s football jersey. That angle was laid out so well that they needed to run with it again this week, I see! Awesome!

-The main event this week is Angle & Team 3D versus LAX & Junior Fatu. Holy crap do I ever hate one of those teams. I’ll let you figure out which one! Angle has just been so…dull in TNA. In and out of the ring. He’s not funny anymore and seems to take himself WAAAAAAAAAY too seriously. I’ve not seen a good Angle match in TNA, either, so it’s not like his wrestling is carrying him through. He’s just a guy I want to see disappear at this point.

Jay Lethal v. Havoc

-I pointed out in last week’s recap why I hate Lethal’s gimmick, but I should have also pointed out that he’s damn good at it. That has to count for something.

-Chris Daniels is out at ringside. Apparently, he’s communing with Jesus. Aren’t we all? Insane Fallen Angel is pretty entertaining and he feels less robotic, so let’s run with it!

-Tenay still hypes Havoc as being part of Serotonin, so I guess he’s not with Mitchell? It’s all very confusing and it’s not like TNA goes out of it’s way to be clear on anything it produces.

-Nice dive off the top to the floor by Havoc. I honestly can’t say if he’s any good, because I don’t think he’s had a match in TNA that’s run over three minutes.

-Lethal’s ribs are taped up, DDP style, after last week’s attack by the Dudz. He’s not selling them or anything, but you can’t have everything.

-Havoc busts out an Osaka Street Cutter! Nifty! I always wondered why a ton of guys weren’t using that as a finisher. Really cool move that’s largely ignored for some reason.

-The only part of the package that Lethal is missing is the elbowdrop. It’s definitely subpar by Macho standards. Of course, Savage also used to kill guys with it to avoid being injured himself, so maybe it’s a good thing that Lethal’s isn’t identical.

-Backstage, Karen Angle is fighting with Kurt. Again. Who gives a shit?

-More Angle, of course. Can’t get enough of him and he’s obviously spiked the ratings from the 0.9s they used to get all the way to the 1.1s they get now. If they double the amount of screen time he gets, perhaps they’ll hit 1.3 by next year! Anyway, he tells us that he attacked Sting’s son because he wanted to face the “old Sting.” Wouldn’t that require a hair cut, some blonde dye, more colorful paint and a Lex Luger heel turn?

-Karen comes out to argue. What a fox. She essentially reveals that the entire “Sting slapped Karen” bit had been set up by Kurt all along. She thinks he went over the line going after Sting’s son. He goes all emotionally abusive on her and I fast forward. Sting shows up on the tron. Is it go time? Nope. A dummy falls from the sky (the jokes too easy, so I won’t go there) and Angle is tricked into giving it an anklelock! That’ll learn him!

-Kevin Nash chats with Sting. He tries to talk Sting out of killing Angle, telling him that he doesn’t want to go out like that. Sting disagrees and tells Nash not to “lose his edge.” Holy shit! Nash is going to wrestle again! He’s gotta be the best con man in the history of the business. How many times has he fucked TNA over as an in ring talent? Yet they keep going back to him. Tremendous. They need to bring back Scott Hall. I know he’s been working in Mexico and Puerto Rico, but I need him on my TV ASAP. One more for the good guys!

-Team Pacman promo. Why are they now censoring the word “ass?” And why does Pacman look like he’s about to fall asleep?

XXX (Elix & Senshi) v. Team Pacman - Non-Title

Senshi murderizes Killings. Could they waste Ki any more than they already do? What’s sad about the death of the X-Division isn’t so much the state it’s in now, but the fact that it could be better than it *ever* was in like a week if they cared enough to do it. They have talent out the ass, but this is what he’s wasted on instead.

-We’re almost two minutes into this and Killings hasn’t spun. Oh…wait.

-Pacman tosses a football at Senshi. I wish Ki would just stand up right now and kick him full force in the head. At least TNA will get *something* out of the $25,000 per appearance he’s supposedly making. And I’ll get to see a whole lot of awesome. DO IT, KI!

-They really book his inability to do anything physical poorly. He should basically be hiding out on the apron, but he continually gets tagged in for long stretches, when the rest of the guys have to stand around and basically do nothing. What’s the point?

-Elix comes in, looking impoverished. Damn…dude needs to hit the catering table. Get thee a sammich!

-Now Killings hits an Osaka Street Cutter. What the hell? Do they just pick one move at the beginning of the tapings and declare it the move of the night?

-Pacman distracts Elix by “making it rain,” allowing Truth to hit the axe kick and get the win. I bet Tommy Urbanski thought that was HY-LARIOUS! The topper on this is Mike Tenay saying, “making it rain” over and over again. He needs the street cred, yo.

-The Steiners come out and I’m assuming that even as faces, Scotty is going to murder this idiot and then nail his wife. Instead, he hugs him. Boo! He calls out Team 3D and says that when they go to Atlanta, they’re going to tailgate, roasting the fattest pigs in TNA. Hahahaha…Bubba fat jokes never grow old.

-Could we get a moratorium on the phrase, “Hotlanta?” That’s so very 1996.

-Dudz respond, essentially with a yo mama joke. Sigh. He cracks on Britney as well. So timely and relevant! Maybe Chris Crocker will bust a cap in his ass and I won’t have to see him anymore. DO IT, FREAKY AMBISEXUAL CREEPY PERSON! And now I'm timely and relevant!

-Nash chats with the Angles. I’d rather have more of the former and much, much less of the latter. Angle storms of being all ARRRRGH Hulk smash angry. Nash (to Karen): “Is he like that at home?”

-The TNA Knockouts come out, with the final two having a match. Here’s who we have: Christy Hemme, Jackie Moore, O.D.B., Talia Madison, Angel Williams, Roxxi Laveaux and...

Gail Kim v. Amazing Kong

-If you’ve never seen Kong, imagine Vader. Except black and presumably a chick. She’s actually really good in the female wrecking ball role. She might have the only natural breasts in the division as well!

-Gail looks shocked at the appearance of Amazing Kong. Why, I’m not sure. Their entrances were 10 seconds apart and I’m pretty sure that Kong has a tough time hiding out backstage.

-Kong annihilates Gail and kills her with a sitout powerbomb. Good debut for Kong, as she looked pretty much invincible.

-Earlier, Don West interviewed Sonjay Dutt. Color me amused at the direction they’re taking his character, as he’s now looking for donations for the “Guru Humanitarian Fund.” To stop the Ebola Virus in Nairobi, no less. Dutt: “Enough Ebola Already! Indeed. This quickly went from being retarded to being retardedly awesome, so kudos to TNA for that.

-We get a really brief clip of Tomko & Giant Bernard defending the IWGP tag titles in Japan. Didn’t really catch who they were wrestling. Actually, I’m unfamiliar with a lot of the newer NJPW guys, so I might not have known who they were anyway. Kinda looked like Yuji Nagata in one part, but I’m not sure. Nor do I feel like looking it up!

Chattin’ With the Champ

-An interview segment with Christian (and AJ, of course!)? Yay, maybe? Your special guest is Samoa Joe and Christian was nice enough to theme the set to the occasion.

-When Joe comes out, AJ immediately hides behind the tiki bar. Oh, AJ. You so crazy. The segment is pretty boring, but AJ eating a banana is funny for some reason. This leads to a brawl (shocking, I know!) and AJ blasts Joe with a ukulele. It does nothing. Poor AJ. He wasn’t aware that Samoans have hard heads. Matt Morgan is out to carry AJ to the back. Christian takes advantage of the distraction, attacking Joe with a coconut. Hey, that’s only 24 years out of date.

-LAX promo. I’ve got nothing.

Petey Williams v. Robert Roode (w/Ms. Brooks)

-This ended up being a nice back and forth match. I really have nothing bad to say about it. It wasn’t good, but considering how much I dislike Roode, merely being okay is a victory on his part. Roode wins with a Fisherman’s suplex, by the way. I should stick at least a little bit of play by play into these things.

-More Angle. He’s looking for Sting in a bathroom. It’s so spur of the moment that they had time to set up proper lighting in the bathroom, which they do a piss poor job of hiding. Ugh. Angle kicks in a stall door and finds nothing. The next door reveals Fatu, who apparently didn’t notice the sound of Angle kicking in stall doors, as he sits reading the paper while presumably taking a dump. Angle and JB wish they could take that vision back, but you can’t unsee that sort of thing, I’d imagine.

Raven & Black Reign v. Rhino & Abyss

-If I said that they brawled around the building and hit each other with plunder, would you believe me?

-Raven DDTs Abyss into tacks. Why does he feel the need to take so many facefirst bumps into the tacks? It’s all fun and games until someone puts an eye out.

-Would you continue to believe me if I told you that the partners ended up brawling? Rhino ends up taking an accidental Black Hole Slam and Dustin gets the win.

-Fatu promo. He did it for the Rock, you know. Also, the People.

LAX & Junior Fatu v. Team 3D & Kurt Angle

-I hope Homicide can pull off a miracle here. I loves me some Hernandez, but I don’t think the Dudz or Angle are going to let him toss them around like the sacks of crap that they are.

-’Cide looks really, really tiny out there. There’s a huge disparity in size in this company. Hey! Maybe that’s why they used to feature these awesome matches….called it the X-Division, or something.

-I write it every time they come out, but this match is every Dudz match from the last five years. Way to change it up, guys!

-Homicide sets Angle up for the Gringo Killa. You have no idea how hard I’d mark out if he hit it. I’m not sure *I* know how hard I’d mark out if he dropped Angle on his melon. No dice, though.

-Hernandez just sailed over the top rope with that plancha. My jaw literally dropped. Again. As it always does. The guy is awe inspiring.

-Homicide gets a visual fall on Angle (ref is distracted). Angle gets the actual fall on Homicide, after an Olympic Slam. Sad.

-This wasn’t good, but it was pretty fun to watch. That actually describes the entire show this week.

-Postmatch, Sting reveals himself as one of the members of the Latino Nation and beats Angle down.

-Bound For Glory hype closes the show. Tenay: “Bound For Glory is that one Pay Per View every year that we build to.” Yeah, it’s nice that you pay attention to at least one of them. Heh.

-Sting: “We’re only going to put the best of the best in the ring.” Wow…half the guys on the show seem to point in a different direction. But what do I know?

Decent-ish show this week. Much better than the first two hour Impact, at any rate. I hope they can grow into the extra hour, because this company has so much potential right now. I think that’s what makes me so hostile towards the current product. It could be so much more and they wouldn’t even have to tweak all that much to get there. Time will tell how that turns out, I guess.

TNA iMPACT! (10.4.07)

2007-10-15T21:22:00.000-05:00

-I couldn’t bring myself to watch two hours of TNA, so yeah…this is *real* late. Heh. These pretty much have to be done “random thoughts” style, because I’m not sure I can stomach this much of this show otherwise. Incredibly, though, Impact this week wasn’t all that bad, with the final hour making it more than worth watching. Perhaps there’s hope yet. Of course, I might also sprout another head tomorrow. The odds are against both of these things.

-They really overuse the James Earl Jones sounding voiceover guy and, by extension, the big melodramatic opening. Sometimes, you just need to let the action speak for itself. Therein lies the problem, I guess, since we haven’t gotten all that much that can be referred to as “action” as of late.

-First match they hype is Team 3D versus Team Pacman. Who gives a fuck about Pacman Jones? Really. ESPN bit for maybe three days and even then they shat on the angle and didn’t get the TNA name right. If you’re going down the “any press is good press” road, do it right and hire Michael Vick. Also, Gary Wolfe. I think you see where I’m going with this and it would be glorious. They’d get way more press than they could handle.

And why are they wrestling Team 3D? Disregarding the fact that the Dudz are the stalest act in the business, they’re both heels and this does nothing for either team. Or for me as a viewer, for that matter.

-The main event (XXX, Christian & AJ versus LAX, Junior Fatu & Samoa Joe) looks like it should rock. I’ve heard lots of complaints about Fatu, but people seem to forget that he was always really good. He definitely got stale, but the in ring stuff was always solid. I’ll take a guy who can work over some of the people TNA trots out any day of the week.

Black Reign v. Rhino

-Silverdust might just be the dumbest thing in TNA right now. That’s a tough competition to win, but they’re striving hard this time out.

-Violence! Fucking Violence! Josh might be the only person on the planet who remembers this, but GH & Joe (another arcane IWC reference!), I believe, put together this amazing Rhino mega mix that rocked my world back in the day. Whatever happened to GH & Joe, anyway? The Shooters needs to make a comeback. I don’t have enough Scott Christ “yellow bitches” recaps in my life right now.

-The announcers are talking about Black Reign being with Jim Mitchell. Did I miss that? It’s possible, because I watch large chunks of Impact in fast forward (including this one!).

-You know, Dustin could still be valuable to them. He seems to be moving around the ring pretty well and the punches look gorgeous. Why bog him down with this crap that’s never going to get over. They seemed to sign him just so WWE couldn’t, though, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.

-Raven looks on backstage. How long before he’s with Mitchell as well? It’s the least logical thing they could do, what with Mitchell SCALPING him and all, but illogical is what TNA does best. Bank on it.

-The crowd is really into this. Or, the audio sweetening guy (Is it sexist to assume that it’s a man? I apologize to the many female audio enhancers who grace this blog with their presence) is, anyway. The crowd looks like it’s largely sitting on it’s collective hands.

-Here comes Raven. Cue the clusterfuck. Rhino gets a win in the mess. Heels beat him down. That brings Abyss, which brings Mitchell, which brings Havoc (another new member of Mitchell’s group, I guess). Brawl, brawl, brawl. Black Reign attacks Abyss with a scythe looking thing and Sting runs out to make the save. Ugh.

-If you’re keeping score, the entire point of that segment was to transition into the stupid Sting/Angle, err…angle that’s going to run through the rest of the show. At this point, we just see Angle on a football field.

-Looks like Angle is at Sting’s son’s high school football game. You’d think that Sting would recognize the field before Angle tells him where he was. You’d be wrong.

-Jay Lethal and Sonjay Dutt promo. I hate the Black Machismo gimmick. I don’t think a gimmick that’s solely designed to make you think of someone who’s not only not a part of the company, but who will likely never show up at all is a bad business move. How does this get Lethal over? In this case, it doesn’t. Team 3D attack and destroy both of them. Mike Tenay: “DID YOU SEE THAT!?! No, dumbass…I’m not even looking at the TV right now. Thanks for the random screaming that makes me aware of the exact points that I’m supposed to be excited.

-3D drags Lethal/Dutt to the ring and continues the slaughter. Shark Boy (in a neckbrace) runs out, but he’s killed as well. This is leading to Bubba talking. I just know it! 3D to Sharkboy. Superbomb on Dutt. Fuck. Bubba’s got a mic. He keeps it brief, demanding that the match tonight be for the title, or they’ll continue destroying people. Lethal gets a 3D through a table for good measure.

-Sting is in the production truck. He wants to talk to Angle. You think they’d have some headphones in the production truck, of all places, but again…you’d be wrong (ignoring the set that the producer is wearing, ‘natch).

-Any Robert Roode promo is a fast forward point for me. I gathered that the only reason Ms. Brooks continues to work for him is because her mother is sick, though. He storms off and the two backstage interview chicks argue. What a valuable use of television time! Imagine the ratings spike!

Jackie Moore v. Gail Kim

-Gail is looking lovely as always. We can discuss this in more depth, because there’s nothing happening in the ring that requires our attention. And as soon as I write that, Gail spills James Storm’s beer. Snap! Now it’s on! Jackie kicks her right in the friggin’ head. Okay, that was cool. VKM is out and we’re back to sucking. Then Christy Hemme comes out with Lance Hoyt and Jimmy Rave. I dig Rave a bunch and think he’s one of the few credible heels on the indy scene, so this is picking up again. It’s like a roller coaster!

-They just called Gail’s finisher the “Happy Ending.” Oy. The rest of the girls beat her down. She bails and then they brawl amongst themselves. Someone cares about this. I’m not that guy, though.

-Jim Cornette rewards Team 3D’s behavior by making it a title match tonight. Way to be in charge there, Jimmy! Sting storms in, looking for answers. Corny has none to offer.

-Angle updates us on the game, which looks to have as many as 15 people in attendance!

Team 3D vs. Team Pacman

-If we’re lucky, this will only suck a lot. I bet Truth will spin a bunch, though. It’s probably 75% of his offense these days. What happened to him, anyway? He used to be *awesome*. Bubba tries to tackle Pacman, but can’t. This is so stupid. The entire angle. The entire mindset that stupid random celebrity X (be it Toby Keith or Johnny Fairplay or Urlacher or Chris Rock or the NASCAR guy or the White Sox guy or so on or so on or so on) will add anything to the product or cause even one extra person to tune in. Ugh.

Anyway, this is every Dudz match from the past five years. VKM is out, but Pacman chases them away with a chair. And here comes the Steiners! Okay, I can support this part. I assume that the match is over, but the referee doesn’t seem to know either, so we’ll let it slide. Steiners hit their pose and I mark out like it’s 1992. At any rate, there’s some really creative booking at the end of this one. Who worries about sill things like a finish?

-Raven compares himself to Terry Funk, with people thinking that Funk was washed up when he retired in ‘82. And again in ‘85. Many retirements later, Funk beat him for the ECW Title. So he’s going to sit back and let everyone else kill themselves, then swoop in and pick the bones. He books himself in a match at BFG with Abyss and Rhino. Abyss walks in, turns it into Monster’s Ball and adds Black Reign to the mix. TNA: Where the inmates run the asylum!

Gauntlet Match

-Uh…I kinda fast forwarded through the reasoning behind this match. I assume it was really intelligent, though! You can’t possibly mess this match up, so this should be a nice respite from crap for however long it lasts.

-(1)James Storm starts with (2)Kaz. I’m liking Kazarian more and more as of late. His personality seems to be connecting with me. He used to come off as being kinda cheesy, but right now I dig him.

-Moving on, Storm spikes him with a Lungblower, which has made it’s way to TNA a year past any relevance the move ever had. It was the Shining Wizard of 2006. I’m still trying to work out what the big, overused indy move of 2007 is. The lariat, perhaps? Nigel McGuinness alone uses enough of them for every single wrestler on the planet twice over. I would have guessed that it would be variations on the Go2Sleep, but that hasn’t seemed to make a big splash in the US as of yet. There’s always 2008.

-The opening segment here rocked. Lots of fast, athletic wrestling. For a few minutes, TNA really was the wrestling alternative. Best in ring stuff I’ve seen from TNA in months (though I understand that Bound For Glory supposedly rocked. I need to pick it up and see for myself.)

-(3)Robert Roode is out. Kaz quickly takes over on him. Looks like they’re setting him up to be the star of this one. No complaints. Anyway, I thought that Roode would be a star about a year ago. Just goes to show how fallible the human race really is. Roode does redeem his employment by trying to murder Kaz with a Waterwheel slam. Tremendous!

-(4) is Petey Williams. He drops Storm with an inverted Lungblower. Was the TNA crew hitting the indy tapes or something? He also hits his atrocious tilt-a-whirl into Russian Legsweep. People bag on the Canadian Destroyer, but that move is infinitely worse.

-(5) is Eric Young. Does anyone outside of that arena care about EY? He’s a one note character who’s long since lost whatever hook he might have had with the crowd. Has any “happy go lucky” goofball character ever managed to persevere over time? From Evad Sullivan to Eugene, it’s a one trick pony that ends up going nowhere. And what do you know…he goes directly after Roode. We’ve never seen that before!

-(6)Jimmy Rave is here! Tenay puts over his work in the Dragon Gate promotion. He hits From Dusk ’til Dawn (tilt-a-whirl into a crossface) on Kaz. I’d bitch because I don’t like the move, or any move out of a tilt-a-whirl that isn’t a slam or backbreaker really, but this looked damn good, so he gets a pass.

(7)Chris Sabin is next. He does his big multi-man match spot, kicking off the other wrestlers in the ring to hit a Tornado DDT. You know, there’s not a whole lot going on here. Each new guy comes out and hits his spots and then it’s just some lackluster brawling. Of course, it *is* a battle royal, so I guess that’s to be expected.

(8) is Alex Shelley! Yay! Murder City Machine Guns (Sabin & Shelley) rock your world. Probably the best team in the world as far as doubleteam work is concerned. Jimmy Rave charges him immediately. The Embassy EXPLODES! Prince Nana must be bummed. MCMGs work him over for a bit, then toss Petey Williams. Shelley snaps Rave’s throat across the top rope and Sabin dropkicks him off the apron to eliminate him

(9) Lance Hoyt is out. Who still thinks that this 5th rate Kevin Nash is worth keeping around? He cleans house, but the MCMGs team up and take control. Shelley whips Sabin toward him, but Hoyt drops out of sight and Sabin is eliminated. BOO!

-Finally, (10)Chris Harris is out. Remember when he was the better half of AMW? Storm has really stepped up. If anything, Harris seems to have regressed. He cleans house as well, quickly transitioning into the inevitable AMW brawl. There’s another “haven’t seen that one yet!” sort of pairing.

-Kaz connects with a ginormous dropkick off the top. He looks down at Ms. Brooks at ringside and Roode knees him in the back. He goes through the ropes, though, not over. Ms. Brooks checks on him. Roode isn’t happy and demonstrates this by beating the snot out of Kaz.

-Just for the sake of being a completionist, I’ll point out that Chris Harris was tossed during the break. Shows how important he’s viewed as these days.

-Shelley is eliminated after going up top and eating a big boot from that turd Hoyt. Double BOO!

-Eric Young and Robert Roode team up to toss Hoyt out. My mind? BLOWN! Or not.

-Kaz slides under the bottom rope and takes a moment to kiss Ms. Brooks’ hand. He manages to clothesline Roode out, but Storm then eliminates him as he tries to skin the cat back in. EY/Storm are the final two. Storm locks Young in a sleeper. EY kicks out of the corner and lands on top (a la Bret/Austin from Survivor Series) for the win.

-This was a really fun match. Lots of it didn’t make a lick of sense, but you sorta expect that with the battle royal format. So good, spotty action that they’ve been so sorely lacking as of late. It certainly wasn’t hyped as an X-Division match, but this is as close as they’ve come to that sort of match in ages. This is what sets (or could set) TNA apart from the WWE juggernaut and I just don’t understand why they don’t trot this sort of stuff out more often. It also went longer than five minutes. Imagine that!

-Earlier, AJ Styles was apparently trying to leave for Japan with Tomko (who was going to defend the IWGP Tag Titles, which he holds with Giant Bernard, AKA Albert). Christian put the kibosh on that. AJ is sad, but Tomko doesn’t seem to mind. If there’s any cooler guy in TNA right now that Tomko, I don’t know who it would be. Actually, this entire group is great. AJ had become overexposed, so putting him the lackey role has not only given him a personality, but it’s freshened him up quite a bit. Tomko as the laid back guy who ignores all the tomfoolery around him is a great character as well. As far as Christian goes, he’s really the one “WWE castoff” that has risen above what he was in the past to become something newer (and better) in TNA. Kudos to him, since he’s been given a whole lot of shit to work with and he’s turned it to gold more often than not.

-LAX versus XXX in an Ultimate X match at Bound For Glory. Why? Shouldn’t that be a feud ender? I wasn’t even aware that these two teams were feuding at all. Maybe they just like the number of Xs that they can roll out with this match. Xs are XTREME, after all.

-Angle pretty much intimates that he’s going to rape and/or kill Sting’s son. Good thing no one watches this show. He’ll get off scot free!

XXX (Daniels & Senshi), AJ Styles & Christian Cage v. LAX, Junior Fatu & Samoa Joe

-Only TNA could make me sick of seeing Samoa Joe. How is that even possible. It’s not even his fault, I guess, as he’s been booked like a chump for almost a year now. I almost typed “chimp” there before I caught it. Then I realized that it might be just as accurate. Heh.

-Hernandez is a friggin’ BEAST! As much as I love LAX, I wouldn’t mind seeing them split, with Homicide anchoring the X-Division and Hernandez moving into the heavyweight division. The thought of him tossing guys around like rag dolls makes me grin. He gives Senshi a backdrop here that pretty much sends him out of Earth’s orbit. Insane.

-Homicide hits a tope con hilo and lands directly in front of the announce table. Mike Tenay looks like he’s literally just seconds away from shitting himself. Dare I say tremendous?

-Joe is in complete wrecking ball mode here, so I take back any accusations of staleness. How can watching him beat the crap out of people ever get old?

-Daniels gets to be the lucky one that receives the Stinkface. I wonder if they drew straws before the match? It’s even worse these days, I guess, as there’s a hell of a lot more ass there to deal with.

-The sprint to the finish here is great. Really hot match overall. Hernandez dives over the top with a plancha that was just awe inspiring. It’s gotten to the point where it can almost come off as mundane when a little guy does it. When Hernandez does it, you mark out and mark out hard.

-Senshi tags into the match…in the complete opposite corner from where he started. The referee could at least try. If he doesn’t care, why should I?

-Fatu spikes Elix Skipper with the Island Driver. I was honestly expecting Skipper to get pinned, because that’s the sort of thing that happens in TNA, but I’m wrong again. Joe gives Senshi a Muscle Buster to pick up the win.

-This was a little short for my tastes. Overall, though, it was a hell of a match. Again, they just let a bunch of good workers go out and open things up and it resulted in some excitement on a show that desperately needed some. Imagine that!

-Angle kidnaps Sting’s son on national television. So, uh…why didn’t anyone ever call the cops, anyway? I understand what they want to do with this, but it’s so hard to suspend disbelief when there are holes big enough to drive a truck through in pretty much every angle they run. Eh.

-Second hour was really good and what I was hoping the two hour show would bring. First hour was like the old Impact, which is precisely what they want to avoid in the future.

-The next show will be up before the weekend. I should mention that even if I start doing the recaps as soon as I watch the show, it’ll still be over the weekend before they go up. Watching The Office is soooooo much more important to me than TNA right now, so it wins the Thursday Night battle every time. If TNA writers were even half as interesting, it would be the best wrestling show on the air.

Friday Night SmackDown 10/5/2007: For and Against

2007-10-08T03:05:00.000-05:00

FOR: Leading off with the Cena announcement.

FOR: I hope that thing's made out of wood.

AGAINST: This has never been a good idea.

FOR: Oooh, chain wrestling.

FOR: JBL with the Mets joke.

FOR: This match, especially the last 30 seconds.

AGAINST: Push-ups?

FOR: Technically, Matt's already ahead.

AGAINST: A what fan base?

FOR: The camera view from Matt's corner during the Boston Crab sequence.

AGAINST: Sure looks like Matt saw the low blow.

AGAINST: What, Kane couldn't wait a couple minutes?

FOR: Victoria's jumpsuit.

AGAINST: Why is Kane doing sitout dropkicks? Or attempting them, even?

FOR: Who's that?

FOR: MVP's big mouth tripping him up.

AGAINST: Is that a title match for Sunday?

AGAINST: Is Kennedy the new Nash?

FOR: There's that virus thingy. "SAVIOR_SELF"? "bookshelves"? Totally Jericho, right?

FOR: Jesse and Festus! Finally!

FOR: Jesse's running counter into the monkey flip.

FOR: JBL, to Cole, on Festus: "He looks like you at the end of most nights."

FOR: Jobbers don't usually get this much offense. Must be setting up the hot tag.

FOR: See?

AGAINST: Saw IV? Really?

FOR: Rey's strategy.

WCW House show - 3.7.92

2007-09-30T17:16:00.001-05:00

I don’t think I’ve ever recapped a handheld show before. Basically, if you’re not familiar with the concept, these are house shows where someone managed to sneak in a camera to film the show. Sometimes you get a complete show…sometimes not so much. This one only runs 48 minutes, so I’m assuming that the undercard stuff just didn’t merit being taped. That’s a shame, because I loved the 1992 WCW undercard, but I’m silly like that. What did make tape here is pretty cool, though, so it was a quick way to both alleviate some boredom and produce some content. So…yeah. Here you go.

WCW Handheld - 3.7.1992 - Oakland, CA

Cactus Jack v. Abdullah The Butcher -

I’ll try, since I’m watching the WCW Saturday Night set from 1992, to relay a bit of the backstory to these matches. In this case, Cactus brought in Abby as one of the surprises in the box for Sting. They teamed up because both off them are insane, then broke up because both of them are insane. They ended up getting together again like a month or so after this because, again, both of them are batshit insane.

Abby comes out with a staff (well…more of a board, really) that has a shrunken head on the top. I wonder if he’ll use it to bludgeon Cactus? Hmm. Cactus jumps him as he climbs in, but Abby immediately starts firing back with the staff. Who would have guessed? Cactus bumps to the floor. He climbs onto the apron and Abby flings him onto the timekeeper’s table. Which freaks the timekeeper right the fuck out, let me tell you. Heh. He moves faster than guys that old really should. Cactus picks up a trashcan looking thing and starts pummeling Abby with it. Busting him open, no doubt, since just looking at Abby makes him bleed. Camera is a bit too far away to catch that particular detail, though.

Cactus pounds on him a bit more in the ring, then monkey flips (!!!) him out of the corner. That may legitimately be the most insane thing I’ve ever seen in a wrestling ring. Let me repeat…a guy friggin’ monkey flipped Abdullah the Butcher! Beyond the absurdity of the visual, I think it may well be the only actual bump that Abby has taken in like 50 years. If this crowd was a douchebag smart mark crowd circa 2007, this would almost certainly warrant a “Holy Shit!” chant. Cactus drops a pair of legs and picks up a nearfall. He comes off the top, but it looks like Abby either nails him with a thrust to the throat or, more probably, a thrust to the throat using a foreign object. Cactus again bumps to the floor.

Match clips a bit and Abby is choking Cactus on the opposite side of the ring. Cactus escapes and ends up tossing a big, heavy looking padded chair into the ring. Ref snatches it immediately. Cactus climbs onto the apron, but Abby knocks him off with a running (!) shoulder block. He follows Cactus out and tosses him across the table once again. He smacks around with his staff and Cactus retreats up the aisle. They brawl to the back and the referee counts both of them out. What a shocker that is.

Fun match, if only to see Abby take a bump! Seriously, this is exactly what you’d expect this match to be. Nothing more, nothing less.

Larry Zbyszko (w/Madusa) v. Barry Windham -

Zbyszko, along with Arn Anderson, had broken Windham’s hand by slamming it in a car door. This was at Halloween Havoc 1991, if memory serves. Which lead to Zbyszko calling himself “Cruncher,” which I still think is the most tremendous wrestling nickname ever. Anyway, Windham is back and looking for revenge. He’s still wearing a protective covering over the hand, though. This should have lead to him going back to the black glove that he wore when he was a Horseman, but I shouldn’t fantasy book in the middle of a recap. Or ever, really. Neither should you.

Zbyszko attacks first. He sends Windham into the ropes and backdrops him. He tosses him out and rams him into the railing. He rolls Windham in, plants him with a swinging neckbreaker and picks up a two count. Zbyszko chokes him in the ropes, but Windham frees himself with an eye rake. This is what I always liked about Windham (who is pretty much my favorite wrestler ever). Even when he was a face, he wrestled like a heel and just didn’t take shit from anyone. Anyway, he punches away at Zbyszko and tosses him to the floor.

He rams Zbyszko into the table a few times. Madusa attacks him, but he pretty much just shrugs her off. She runs like hell to get away, but he just turns back to beating Zbyszko’s ass. Back in the ring, he gives Zbyszko a gut wrench suplex and gets a two count. Windham continues the assault, but gets distracted by Medusa, allowing Zbyszko to nail him from behind. He tosses Windham out and crotches him on the railing. This must be Falls Count Anywhere, as Zbyszko covers him on the floor. Windham is out at one.

Zbyszko rolls him back in. He slams Windham and covers him for a nearfall. Windham fires back, planting him with a back suplex. He goes for a whip, but Zbyszko reverses. Windham quickly rolls him up with a small package and picks up the win. Postmatch, Zbyszko jumps him, but Windham quickly drives him off. Medusa comes in and jumps on his back, but Windham flips her to the mat. Heels bail, but not before Medusa gets on the mic and calls Windham a “woman beater.”

Eh. This was pretty short and I’ve never been much of a Zbyszko fan. He doesn’t stall at all here, though, which is almost as insane as someone monkey flipping Abdullah the Butcher. Alright for what it was, I guess.

Arn Anderson, Bobby Eaton & Steve Austin v. Steiner Brothers & Dustin Rhodes -

This is more like it. Anderson and Eaton are the tag champs and feuding with the Steiners. I don’t remember Austin specifically feuding with Rhodes, so I’m guessing that these two are just thrown in. Austin as a fellow member of the Dangerous Alliance and Rhodes as a babyface who’s constantly feuding with the Dangerous Alliance. I just have to point out that the first thing you notice here is just how normal Scott Steiner looks. It’s scary, as he looks like a completely different person today. Not like he’s aged or anything, but literally as if he was a different human being who replaced the original Scott Steiner. That’s some second Ultimate Warrior level conspiracy theory shit for you.

Rhodes opens the match versus Anderson. He repeatedly goes for a side headlock, but Arn escapes by yanking him down with the hair. He kicks Dustin in the gut and sends him into the corner. Whip to the opposite corner, but he runs into a knee. He goes for a second charge, but Dustin gets a boot up this time around. Dustin heads up top, but gets crotched. Dustin blocks an attempted superplex and knocks Anderson to the mat with a series of headbutts. Dustin levels him with a lariat off the top. Eaton and Austin run in, but a few Bionic elbows solves that problem real quick. Heels bail to regroup. Back in and Arn tags Austin. He knees Rhodes in the gut and hammers him across the back with a series of forearms.

He snap mares Dustin, who sits out into a hammerlock. Austin fights to his feet. He counters into an armbar, then jacks Dustin’s jaw with a shortarm clothesline. Dustin reverses a whip, sending Austin into the corner. He goes for a monkey flip, but Austin shrugs him off. He climbs to the second rope, but leaps into a clothesline. Dustin covers, but only gets two. Scott Steiner tags in. He gives Austin an inverted atomic drop, then tosses him with an overhead belly to belly suplex. Austin stumbles into the face corner and they ping pong him around with punches. Scott slams him and picks up a nearfall. Tag to Rick. Arn tags back in as well. Side headlock by Rick. Arn shoots him into the ropes, but gets tackled.

Rick is sent into the ropes again. Arn tries to leapfrog him, but Rick plucks him out of the air and powerslams him. Much like you don’t powerbomb Kidman, you don’t try to leapfrog Rick Steiner. It can only lead to bad things. Arn tags Eaton, who backs Rick into the corner. Rick blocks a punch and biels him out. Steinerline! Eaton bails. Rick follows, though, catching him with a Steinerline off the apron! Match clips and Arn and Eaton have Scott Steiner in a double top wristlock. He backflips free and takes them over with a double Japanese armdrag. Rick runs in, knocking both guys over the top with a double Steinerline!

Eaton ends up tagging in. He clocks Scott with a vicious right hand, which you could literally hear in the cheap seats, since that’s where this is being filmed. He goes for a whip, but Scott reverses it and plants him with a Tilt A Whirl slam! Now it’s Eaton’s turn to reverse a whip. Arn catches Scott with a knee to the back. That brings in Rick, which distracts the ref, of course. Heels pounce on Scotty and Austin switches in illegally. He suplexes Scott, then rams him into Arn’s outstretched knee. Tag to Anderson.

He snapmares Scott and drops a knee. Cover gets two. Tag to Eaton. Arn cuts off the tag with a drop toehold and Eaton nails Scott with an elbowdrop that gets the heels another nearfall. Tag to Austin, who whips Scott *hard* into the corner. He whips him to the opposite corner, but runs into a boot. Scott comes back with a clothesline. He crawls toward his brother, but Austin yanks him back into the heel corner. Eaton tags in. he pounds on Scott briefly and tags Arn. He sends Scott into the ropes and drops down. He loses him when he gets back to his feet and they end up cracking heads.

Both guys tag, bringing in Dustin and Steve Austin.. Rhodes cleans house with Bionic elbows. He levels Austin with a lariat and goes for the cover. Arn breaks it up. Everyone comes in and brawls. Dustin and Austin brawl to the outside and the referee counts them out. But wait! This is apparently an elimination match, because the ref just boots them and signals for the match to continue. This would be the downside of the handheld, I guess, as this little piece of info wasn’t important enough to be taped, leaving me confused! Scott gets the mic, calls the champs, “chickenshits,” and demands that this turn into a title match. The champs quickly demur.

Arn and Rick are now legal. Rick reverses a whip and plants him with an inverted atomic drop. He charges, but Eaton pulls Arn away and Rick sails over the top rope. Ref is distracted by Scotty, allowing Eaton to ram Rick into the railing. He rolls Rick in and Arn stomps on him. Eaton tags in. He snapmares Rick and drops an elbow for two. Tag to Arn. He whips Rick into the ropes and ducks his head. Rick kicks him and makes the tag. Scotty cleans house. The heels block a double noggin knocker and try to toss him out. He skins the cat back in and clotheslines Arn. Eaton charges and Scott tosses him over the top. This, of course, is 1992, so that would be a DQ. Scott Steiner has been eliminated!

Eaton comes in. Rick backs him into the corner and nails him. Eaton shoots him toward Arn, but he’s knocked off the apron as well. Eaton drives a knee to Rick’s back, sending him onto the apron. Rick grabs Eaton and rams him into the corner. He heads up top…bulldog! He covers and Eaton is eliminated! Arn runs in, taking him over with a snapmare. He climbs to the second rope, but ends up leaping into a Steinerline! Rick covers and gets the win! Postmatch, the champs attack Rick and Arn plants him with a DDT. Scotty quickly runs out to make the save.

Really good match. Not dumbed down at all for the house show crowd. They went all out and ended up putting on a PPV-quality match. This one is worth tracking down for sure.

Rick Rude (w/Paul E. Dangerously) v. Sting - Cage Match -

At the post show bash when Sting beating Lex Luger for the WCW title at Superbrawl II about a week or so earlier, Rude interrupted the celebration, poured a drink on Sting and the Dangerous Alliance beat him down. This is just the latest chapter of the feud, though, as Rude and Sting were pretty much constantly feuding through the early 90s. I have no idea if this is a title match or not, but I guess it doesn’t much matter.

Sting pounds on Rude early and immediately whips him into the cage. Rude takes a particularly nasty bump, as his body folds up between the ropes and the cage and he lands almost headfirst. Sting continues to attack. Rude tries to escape over the top of the cage, but Sting cuts him off and crotches him on the top rope. He follows with both an atomic drop and inverted atomic drop, just to be a dick. No one in the history of the business before or since has sold an atomic drop quite like Rude did. Sting busts out the hip swivel to mock Rude, then locks him in a camel clutch. He splashes down on Rude’s back a few times. One too many, in fact, as Rude flips over and drives his knees right to Sting’s groin on the last attempt.

Rude follows up with an inverted atomic drop of his own. Match clips forward a bit, with Rude working Sting over with some clubbing forearms to the back. He tosses Sting into the cage, then locks him in a camel clutch. Sting powers to his feet, with Rude on his shoulders. Electric Chair drop by Sting. He goes for a splash, but Rude gets his knees up. He plants Sting with a back suplex and climbs to the top of the cage. Sting cuts him off, but Rude kicks him away and comes off with a forearm smash. He covers and picks up a nearfall.

Vertical suplex by Rude gets him another nearfall. He sets up for a second suplex, but Sting blocks it. He suplexes Rude into the cage and Rude winds up hanging upside down from the top of the cage. Sting nails him with a Stinger splash. He goes for a second, but Rude drops to the mat and Sting goes into the cage HARD. Rude knees him in the gut a few times and goes for the Rude Awakening. Sting powers free. He ducks a clothesline and DDTs Rude for two. He heads up top, but leaps into a gut punch.

Rude comes back, spiking Sting with a gorgeous jumping piledriver. He covers, but Sting manages to escape at two. Rude spits on him, which pushes the Stinger into Hulk Up mode. He no sells a few punches and comes back with a series of clotheslines. He flapjacks Rude, then whips him into the corner, bumping the ref. He goes for a Stinger Splash, but Rude gets his knees up. Paul E. tosses in his phone. Sting plants Rude with a back suplex and pins Rude before the phone can come into play.

Postmatch, Sting yanks Paul E. into the cage, but Rude bashes him in the back of the head with the phone and follows with a Rude Awakening before the footage cuts out. This was another good match, but I don’t think they went quite as balls out as the six man tag did. I can’t blame them, I guess, since it was a cage match. Still really fun to watch, but it felt like a house show match, if that makes sense.

Overall, this was awesome to watch. As far as I can recall, it’s the first WCW handheld that I’ve ever seen. I never got to go to a WCW house show because they didn’t run in Central PA, so this is about as close as I’ll ever get, I guess. ‘92 was a great in ring year for WCW, with all sorts of great matches to be found. I won’t say that anything here lives up to the best of the best, but I was far more entertained by this than I am any current day wrestling that pops up on my television…

Guess who's back...

2007-09-29T12:39:00.000-05:00

That would be me! For those few people who read the blog but don't post on the board (If such people even exist. And if you do, howdy!), you might have been losing some sleep over the fact that I disappeared for a while. My PC was fucked up but good and I wasn't online much at all. I ended up buying a new, shiny PC that's all pretty and awesome and stuff. I've been trying to rebuild everything I needed from the old computer (because my ability to play, say...Shaq-Fu on a whim is vitally important!), so I remained in blogger stealth mode and didn't post anything. At any rate, you'll see some new stuff coming soon. I think I'll see how many brain cells recapping twice as much TNA Impact a week can kill and how quickly it makes me hate pro wrestling. Heh.

I'm hoping to write other stuff as well, though my ambition tends to fall on it's ass rather quickly, so we'll see how that goes. For the no one that cares, more video vault posts on the way as well. And since this PC will actually load youtube/dailymotion videos in under a month, I'll actually be watching some of the stuff I post as well. Fun for the whole family!

Expect to see a recap of the ROH: Driven PPV up at some point as well. I don't know how it happened, since my ambivalence about ROH is legendary (in my own mind), but going through the 2007 shows has turned me into a big fan and both PPVs so far have been off the chain, as Tazz might say.

I'll leave you with the balls out awesome Project 161/Age of the Fall angle from ROH. The entire angle started out cool, but Gabe was trying his best to throw it into the shitter. Then...this. Jimmy Jacobs is great and Necro, of course, is beyond great. As much as I geeked out for the Briscoes/Steen & Generico confrontation at the first PPV, this was a hundred times better. EPIC.

"I told you...if you let me outta my cage, I was gonna pile bodies to the sky!"

Friday Night SmackDown! 9/21/2007: For and Against

2007-09-23T14:31:00.000-05:00

FOR:
OUR LONG NATIONAL NIGHTMARE IS OVER.

AGAINST: Hornswoggle's Vince's kid? Fuck you people.

FOR: Maria!

AGAINST: Country, Coach?

AGAINST: Mark Henry's in surprisingly good shape for a guy coming off an ass-kicking by the Undertaker.

AGAINST: They're not gonna try to do this again, are they?

FOR: Good for Batista to remember their history.

FOR: Jeff in a suit. Tremendous.

AGAINST: JBL and Meredith in the pantheon of great weddings?

FOR: Yang's kick to the top of Noble's head.

FOR: The Shannon Moore swerve. I like the fact that they've used the Hornswoggle angle to get the cruiserweights on TV.

FOR: I wasn't expecting MVP to pick the pass off. Maybe deflect it or something.

AGAINST: That car.

FOR: Deuce's jumping kick to MVP's head.

FOR: A reverse Doomsday Device?

FOR: Matt ducking MVP's blind tag attempt.

FOR: Butch Reed? Awesome.

AGAINST: That was a long way to go for that.

FOR: See, Jagged Edge actually needs the money.

AGAINST: Don't give it away now, boys.

AGAINST: I still can't figure out for the life of me what's supposed to happen to throw this wedding off kilter.

FOR: Well, you knew they weren't going to actually have this match finish tonight.

AGAINST: Three 'Heavenly Sword' commercials in one show? A bit much.

FOR: Hacksaw or Balls Mahoney in a suit? DEAR GOD THE CHOICES.

FOR: The look on Vince's face when Hornswoggle appears.

AGAINST: Oh, by the way... 'Rufus'?

FOR: I'd forgotten whose music that was.

FOR: Torrie giving the "cut the mic" signal.

FOR: That was... Candice and Mickie, right? Good looking out, ladies. Rev. Bruce: "Praise Jesus."

AGAINST: Candice's lighter hair. I've been meaning to complain about that for months.

AGAINST: The Godfather? WTFMF.

FOR: JBL: "I was there too."

FOR: JBL bolting from the announce position to catch the Train.

FOR: Well... that hadn't crossed my mind.

Friday Night Smackdown! 8/17/2007: For and Against

2007-08-26T03:53:00.000-05:00

FOR: Post 300!

AGAINST: A Kane/Khali rematch?

AGAINST: "The V.I.P. Lounge"?

AGAINST: A boxing match?

AGAINST: Holyfield? It's clearly worse than I thought. For him, I mean. Seriously, is he broke?

FOR: Matt: "You got a heart condition, all right. It's a lack of."

AGAINST: Masters? We're off to a rollicking start.

FOR: Clear the ring!

FOR: Flair laughing when Stephanie told Vince that his kid's a WWE wrestler was secretly great.

AGAINST: Peach, Vince?

AGAINST: When are Jesse and Festus going to actually get to Smackdown?

FOR: Cole: "I'm a bit Irish."

AGAINST: Wait, so that was Cole as John Oates on WWE Idol? Good God. (FOR: However, Maria bobbing her head in time while Volkoff sang the Russian anthem was tremendous.)

FOR: They did a Morrison/Punk Summerslam ad?

FOR: JBL on Finlay: "Hey, he grew up in Northern Ireland The place is famous for its beautiful barbed wire."

FOR: Finlay throwing Noble into the ropes knee-first.

FOR: Noble and Moore get matches? What show is this?

FOR: JBL: "The fans did not want to see me disfigured."

FOR: Moore's counter of the Gory Bomb.

AGAINST: TMI, Singh. TMI.

FOR: I'm not sure who's the worse dancer here. Cole: "I think Coach has done this before."

AGAINST: Why are the druids carrying torches in daylight IN THE DESERT?

FOR: Michelle slapping Kenny by accident.

FOR: Michelle still selling that slap.

FOR: JBL: "You really don't want Elvira as a bridesmaid."

AGAINST: Do Cole and JBL really think she's not actually completely insane? Don't they watch Raw?

FOR: Michelle's rope-flip armdrag.

AGAINST: Michelle hurting herself afterwards.

AGAINST: That may have been the worst flying clothesline ever.

AGAINST: Triple H as the Six Million Dollar Man in the worst kind of cheese.

FOR: Khali not flinching when Kane's pyro goes off (and Cole pointing out how everybody else does.)

AGAINST: This match.

FOR: JBL: "Kane has been here 10 years. We've never seen this."

Friday Night SmackDown! 8/10/2007: For and Against

2007-08-20T02:57:00.000-05:00

AGAINST: Batista's not in sync with his pyro.

FOR: Flair putting over Khali's Claw.

AGAINST: Deunce n Domino's plan going awry.

AGAINST: That wasn't very smart, Deuce.

FOR: I think Khali actually said "Batista."

AGAINST: We already saw this.

FOR: Rey?

AGAINST: Wait, that's clearly Chavo.

FOR: JBL to Cole: "You fell for it."

FOR: Chavo whiffing on the 619.

FOR: Chavo as Rey, then Eugene as Chavo.

AGAINST: The 330?

FOR: Sterling Keenan? Hey, I've heard of him.

AGAINST: I think they came back from the video a bit late.

AGAINST: I still don't get the spit cup.

AGAINST: "Necking", Cole? What is this, 1957?

FOR: Oh, there's Michelle.

AGAINST: "Life-threatening"? Cole said it was an outpatient procedure.

FOR: JBL on maybe being Vince's illegitimate child: "That would be awesome!" Cole: "You're a 40-year-old man. You wouldn't get an allowance."

FOR: Finlay selling that hard elbow by Matt.

FOR: This match.

FOR: Matt's backslide attempt.

AGAINST: The hell? Where's Finlay going?

FOR: Moore and Funaki beggin goff when Noble says "There's three of us."

AGAINST: Bad move, Finlay.

AGAINST: Sylvan's still alive?

FOR: Cole: "Sylvan may want to surrender!"

FOR: And here's Finlay for revenge. They used to call this "Pulp Piction booking." Straight out of the Tao of Heyman.

AGAINST: Vickie's giving Teddy Viagra? That can't be good. I'm not sure how I feel about this.

AGAINST: Who gave Masters a microphone?

FOR: Masters getting scared and ducking out.

FOR: Flair is still > you, BTW.

AGAINST: That may not have been wise.

AGAINST: How must this look to a non-fan watching this for the first time? A 60-year-old man and that... thing.

FOR: Even JBL's stunned.

Friday Night SmackDown 8/3/2007: For and Against

2007-08-07T03:25:00.000-05:00

FOR: JBL on Teddy : "He's a hero to senior citizens everywhere."

AGAINST: Of course it's on a Friday.

AGAINST: This will end badly, of course.

AGAINST: I was talking about the wedding, but Khali showing up works too.

FOR: Hey, JBL was right.

AGAINST: Aw, I thought Kane was coming out to make his case.

FOR: Masters avoiding Kane's chokeslams.

FOR: That flying clothesline counter into the Master Lock.

AGAINST: Nate Nickerson? Nice hair, dude.

FOR: Henry laughing at his handiwork.

AGAINST: Vince is striking back? Against who? Did someone strike first? There's a leap in logic here that I can't quite accept.

FOR: Korderas catching MVP cheating. Is that against traditional arm wrestling rules?

AGAINST: He's taping up?

FOR: Matt knocking the stress ball out of MVP's hand.

FOR: Round 1 to Hardy.

FOR: JBL on referee Jim Korderas: "He's either from Canada or from the NBA."

FOR: MVP hooking Matt's leg with his left arm to compensate for his injured right arm. It's the little things, folks.

AGAINST: That was one ugly clothesline.

FOR: Matt's baseball slide dropkick to a retreating MVP.

FOR: MVP ducking out. Standard.

AGAINST: Wait, Batista wasn't in there?

FOR: FLAIR! Play on, playa.

FOR: Chavo just mentions Rey and Vickie gives him a match? That was abrupt.

AGAINST: What's with these five-minute commercial blocks?

AGAINST: Two Palumbo videos in the same show?

AGAINST: Cole: "How do you get over that? Losing to a leprechaun?" How do you ask that question?

FOR: JBL: "Hornswoggle's actually as big as Khali's head."

AGAINST: That loses points for the pause before the pie toss.

AGAINST: What's Victoria carrying?

AGAINST: No, JBL ... Victoria's CRAZY.

AGAINST: Torrie's outfit last week was better.

FOR: The fallout from Yang kissing Torrie. JBL: "So if you're a 1 around here, you're gonna get a 10, is what we're saying." Cole: "So... things are looking up for you, partner."

FOR: It IS a spit bucket.

FOR: Victoria's Skipping Of Innocence.

AGAINST: They're getting lazy with the McCool videos. That pool footage is recycled.

FOR: JBL on Cherry: "'Batista' is a hard word to spell. She might have thought it said 'bathroom' or something."

AGAINST: Wait, Deuce doesn't know that Flair was in there and Batista wasn't.

AGAINST: Flair's catch of Deuce backfiring.

AGAINST: They're throwing out the match? Khali's not even all the way down the ramp yet.

AGAINST: A claw? Really?

FOR: Well, I guess if your hand's that big...

ECW on Sci-Fi (7.31.07)

2007-08-05T17:55:00.000-05:00

So it's pretty much random thoughts week. Possibly the first recap I've ever done in real time, too. I'm getting bored with doing so much PBP, so I'm just easing up on that and monkeying around with other ideas. So, uhh...enjoy.

-We're back to "This is Extreme" as our ECW theme. Does that mean we're back to the old shit? Did the new shit just not cut it? I'm confused and the mixed messages that WWE sends just make it that much worse.

-Morrison is totally channeling Raven channeling Jim Morrison and that's actually better than one would imagine. A little less pop cultury than Raven ever was, but that's okay. Raven was never the Shamen of Sexy as far as I know, so Morrison is already one up on him in that department!

-He calls out the greatest athlete in Arizona...Joey Ryan? "Freedom is found at the edge of the abyss," Morrison tells us. Ryan immediately has the best facial hair in WWE. Somewhere, a solitary tear is streaming down Triple H's cheek. Anyway, this is his fifteen minutes of fame. Well, eighteen seconds of it, anyway, as that's how long it takes Morrison to beat him.

-Morrison is looking for some other great athletes from Arizona. Tommy Dreamer, Elijah Burke and CM Punk all answer the call. Hey! Something's not right about this! Morrison takes it upon himself to book them in a three way later. Winner gets his own shot at fifteen minutes of fame next week.

-Stevie Richards! What a week for me to skip a recap, as he actually WON! Go Stevie!

-Styles tells us that Stevie is wearing the same tights from last week, since he thinks they may be lucky. Kevin Thorn disagrees, mauling the shit out of him then entire match. Except for that quick rollup and three count part. Stevie wins again! He showed us and we saw!

-They should really put a different Punk video package together. This one is getting a bit old.

-Big Daddy V looks surly tonight. AWESOME! Some poor sumbitch is about to die. Actually, it's *three* dumb sumbitches! I miss squash matches, so BDV is nothing if not fun to watch.

-Striker is carrying a pointer, which he's waving around as BDV tosses guys around. I surmise that BDV is actually Striker's cyborg proxy and that this is his remote control. You know, randomly coming up with your own explanations for what's happening in the ring is sometimes more fun than the product itself.

-Both Big Daddy V and Striker bust out the old Vader "V" hand signal. I miss Vader. He'd kick the shit out of both of these guys and then punch a police dog in the face or something. He fears no man and feels no pain, after all.

-At any rate, BDV wins. Quite convincingly at that! Boogeyman is out, rocking some new facepaint and apparently some new contacts as well. Stiker collapses the pointer and the heels powder.

-Extreme Expose time! This week we get The Way You Make Me Feel by Michael Jackson. You know, MJ wouldn't even make the top five creepiest guys in WWE list. I don't know what to say about that. Layla missed a move here and turned this into a sub, sub, sub Nitro girls performance. Way to be, Layla!

-They call out Miz, who's now cut pretty much the same exact promo three or four weeks in a row. *yawn* At least he's not completely awful in the ring. Which is good, since Balls Mahoney is coming out. I'd assume that a match will follow!

-If Miz is a "Chick Magnet," Tazz decides that Balls must be a "Grease Magnet." That's just not nice.

-Balls actually hits the Nutcracker Suite! Looked really nice, too. You know, he's way better than people remember. I wonder if he could actually get over at this point if they gave him a push in good faith? It ain't happening here, though, as Miz quickly wins with the neckbreaker. The chicks escort him to the back, where there's presumably some sort of sexual tomfoolery going on.

-For the record, Miz was a heel this week. They can't seem to decide where to place him, for some reason. You'd think the "Miz is a giant douchebag" vibe should make this much more easy than it has been.

-I sure hope they replay that old school ECW Tommy Dreamer video again. Hey, wait! There it is! Good job! Afterwords, Elijah Burke lets us know that his highlight package is far too long to show on this week's show.

-So, we've never seen Punk and Burke hook up, have we? I really like these two, but they've run this into the ground. I don't know if the addition of Dreamer freshens it up or makes it even worse. That remains to be seen, I guess.

-Burke nails Punk with the diving Euro to the back. Punk: "Wow...that hurt!" Heh. I don't think he intended for that to be picked up, but I guess it actually makes the match a bit more believable.

-Why do people still chant for tables? Is it still really that novel? Eh.

-I hate multi-man matches and this match reminds me exactly why that is. It's really convenient how one guy sells until exactly the time that the third guy is tossed out of the ring, then recovers in time to jump the man left in the ring. There's an extreme lack of internal logic in multi-man matches. They can be fun if there right guys are in there, though.

-Burke almost wipes out doing his handstand elbow out of the corner. He was starting to drift towards the floor before he (luckily) managed to catch himself. That could have been a disaster, as they were in the corner with the ring steps.

-Dreamer should never attempt a Texas Cloverleaf ever again. Dean Malenko also has a solitary tear running down his cheek after watching that.

-For some reason, I almost thought that Punk was setting up for a Pepsi Plunge (top rope pedigree) there for a second. I hope he busts it out one day, just to see how people would react. Remember when Chyna hit Jericho (I think...might have been Jarrett, now that I think about it) with one? Yeah, that sucked.

-Ick. A Tower of Doom spot. Leave that shit in TNA, where it belongs.

-Nice GTS by Punk to pick up the win. Dreamer was waaaay too happy for him, though. Not that I'm expecting a heel turn or anything. I just don't think Dreamer should be so happy to have lost a match.

So, I jokingly (mostly) shit on this show all the time, but I do generally enjoy watching it. There's just a bunch of stupid shit that's really easy to pick out. I really like Punk and Burke and I guess Morrison is starting to grow on me (like a fungus!). They just need to expand the roster a bit, as the show feels nearly identical from week to week, just because you have such a small core to focus on. I think it's a perfect opportunity to get some of the developmental guys on a national weekly TV show without the pressure of Raw/SD. Really, that might be the best use for ECW right now. If nothing else, give me Colt Cabana so I can watch him every week. Also, Val Venis. I won't give up until they make it happen! Perhaps an online petition (!!!) will show them that I *really* mean business! Heh.

Ring of Honor - Respect is Earned

2007-08-01T15:28:00.000-05:00

It's done. Finally. Goddamn do I ever hate typing up long recaps. Which is precisely why I don't recap indy shows. It's the bulk of what I watch and I'd love to do it, but just thinking about all that typing makes my head hurt. Anyway, pack a lunch before you read this, as it's really friggin' long. Sorry about that!

-Taped in the Manhattan Center, May 12, 2007. I've always liked the look of this building. It's where Raw was taped in the early days and it just comes across really well on tape.

-Show opens with BJ Whitmer in the ring. Interesting choice. I don't know that I'd have put him out there as the first face on the first PPV, but that's why I'm writing this instead of booking ROH, I guess. He tells us that Ring of Honor lets the wrestling do the talking, then proceeds to talk anyway, throwing out an open challenge…

-Opening montage with various clips of ROH in action.

-That open challenge? Consider it accepted. By the ROH World champion, no less!

BJ Whitmer v. Takeshi Morishima - ROH Title -

Morishima really does look like a Japanese Terry Gordy. That's very much a compliment. Whitmer hammers on him with some forearms, but has no effect. He bounces off the ropes, but 'Shima plants him with a sideslam. He follows up with a running Yakuza kick in the corner. He's just mauling BJ in the corner and even shoves down referee Todd Sinclair for good measure. He sets BJ up for a backdrop driver (his finisher), but Whitmer turns into it, landing on top for a one count. He ducks a lariat, dropping Morishima to one knee with a low dropkick. Running knee strike by Whitmer! Morishima pretty much no sells it, bouncing off the ropes and looking for a clothesline.

Whitmer catches it and plants him with an Exploder (his finisher)! Cover gets two. He follows up with a *hard* lariat and gets another nearfall. Whitmer heads up top and hits a frogsplash, but 'Shima again kicks out at two. Whitmer goes for a wrist clutch Exploder, but Morishima elbows free. Big boot by BJ, but Morishima won't go down. Northern lariat by BJ, followed by a second lariat. 'Shima won't even budge. BJ bounces off the ropes and eats a lariat. Running boot by Morishima gets two. He nails Whitmer with a clothesline and gets another nearfall. He quickly plants BJ with the backdrop driver and gets the win!

This was short, but all action while it lasted. Certainly effective in building up Morishima as a wrecking machine. My problem with this match tends to be my problem with a lot of ROH matches. It's not so much that they work a "Japanese" style, but they frequently take the worst parts of that style (fighting spirit, the repetitive nature of some moves, like a lariat here, for instance) and just run it into the ground. I enjoy a nice clothesline as much as the next guy, but there’s like ten here in a match that barely went three minutes. At some point, it just turns into overkill. The ROH demographic, if you will (which I wouldn't really count myself a part of) eats it up, though, so what do I know?

-Nigel McGuinness is out to challenge Morishima. He doesn't care when they wrestle. Even tonight! This brings out "American Dragon" Bryan Danielson (returning from a shoulder injury after a five month layoff). He, unsurprisingly, disagrees. He runs down the highlights of his fifteen month title reign, including wins over Lance Storm, Samoa Joe, Homicide and even Nigel himself. If anyone deserves the next title shot, it's him! Nigel is ready to rumble, by god! Danielson backs off. Nigel goes face to face with Morishima and Danielson attacks!

Nigel quickly takes over, but then Morishima jumps him as well. He and Danielson are on the same page for now and they take turns beating Nigel down. Danielson picks up the belt and stares at it. Morishima snatches it away and bails. Nigel recovers in the interim and Danielson also gets while the getting is good…

-Video package for Brent Albright. Remember Gunner Scott on Smackdown? Yeah…this is him. He's ROH's hired gun and tells us that he's willing to do pretty much anything for a payday.

Rocky Romero v. Naomichi Marufuji -

Nice touch, with a brief video highlight clip of each guy during the intros. Gives the people watching ROH for the first time at least an idea what to expect from these guys.

Opening matwork leads to a mirror sequence, as both guys end up locking the other in an Octopus Stretch, then roll it into a cover for two. Indy face-offs abound! Honestly, we get it. You're evenly matched. It's all very exciting. Now do something else, for god's sake! Why do people continue to pop for this crap? Maru catches a kick from Romero, who quickly leaps into a jujigatame takedown. Maru won't tap, so Romero eventually releases the hold and starts kicking away at the injured arm. Back to the jujigatame. Maru locks his hands to block it and rolls Romero up for a quick two.

Romero mounts Maru and rains down some strikes. The ref gets in his face and gets spat on for his troubles. At least Romero is trying to heel it up. Go him! He drops a knee and picks up a two count. Romero whips him into the ropes. Maru hangs on and Maru charges him, getting elevated onto the apron. They trade strikes and Maru leaps to the top rope and connects with a short dropkick that sends Romero to the floor. He follows, lifting Romero and ramming him knee first into the ringpost. Back in the ring, he hangs Romero's leg in the ropes and gives him a dragon screw. Nifty! He covers, but Romero is out at two.

Corner whip by Marufuji, but he ends up charging into a back elbow. Romero climbs to the second rope, but Maru cuts him off with a dropkick to the knee. Romero is seated up top and Maru dragon screws him to the mat, then locks him in a figure four. Romero manages to reach the ropes. Marufuji kicks at the leg and goes for a whip. Romero shortarms it, connecting with a spin kick to the gut. Now it's Maru's turn to reverse a whip. Romero plants him with a satellite DDT, though. He comes off the second rope, but Marufuji catches him and looks to turn him over into a half crab.

Romero powers to his feet. Enzuigiri misses, but he connects with a mule kick. Tiger suplex hook, but Marufuji elbows free. Romero springs off the second rope, planting him with a tornado DDT. He covers, but can only get two. He goes for the Tiger suplex again, but Maru flips through to his feet and hits a facebuster to the knee. They trade strikes and Maru levels him with a lariat (there's that move again!). Powerbomb is good for a two count.

Marufuji heads up top, but gets cut off. Romero does a really cool jujigatame takedown off the top that just looks all sorts of arm breaky, but Maru reaches the ropes to force the break. Romero kicks at the injured arm, but just absolutely *eats* a superkick. Not to be outdone, he spins around and connects with a wicked round kick right to the jaw! Both guys are down. Romero rolls into the corner, catching a charging Marufuji with a boot.

Maru charges a second time, springing off the second rope and nailing Romero with a back elbow. He powerbombs Romero into the corner and ties him to the Tree of Woe. Coast to Coast dropkick gets two. He hooks Romero for the Shiranui (Sliced Bread #2 for the Spanky fans among us!), but it's countered and Romero finally hits the Tiger suplex he's been looking for. Marufuji escapes at two. Romero follows up with a buzzsaw kick and gets another nearfall out of it. He's looking for another kick, but Maru blocks it and connects with two of his own. He quickly drops Romero with the Shiranui and picks up the win!

-Larry Sweeny promo. Sweeney's personal trainer, Tank Toland (one of the Dicks in WWE) is with him. Sweeney talks about the stable of guys under him, including Chris Hero, then introduces the newest addition to Sweet n' Sour Inc…Sara Del Ray! Toland makes their lackey, ROH student Bobby Dempsey do squats, because he's going to turn him into a fighting machine. Del Ray starts doing squats as well, which pisses Toland off because chicks aren't allowed to do squats. Dempsey collapses in the background after like five squats and Toland and Del Ray decide to have themselves a squat off. Good segment to get over Sweeney's personality. He's not really like anyone else in ROH, so he really stands out.

-Cut back to the ring, where Nigel is brawling with Morishima. Bryan Danielson hits the ring and we get a redux of the heel beatdown from earlier. KENTA runs out to make the save. This came off flat. It was pretty redundant, really. There's no reason at all that this couldn't have been done after the opening match.

-They run a quick website promo and shill the DVDs.

Matt Sydal & Claudio Castagnoli v. Briscoe Brothers - ROH Tag Titles -

I believe this is the first I've seen of Claudio since he cut his hair. Looks…interesting. It's a shame that I'm not recapping his matches every week on ECW by this point, though. Oh, WWE, how you wound me.

Speaking of Claudio (Segues? *thumbs up*), he opens the match with Mark Briscoe. Matwork, standoff, bleh. You know, the indy standoff stuff is really just an East coast thing. It's not nearly as obnoxious in the Midwest shows or the SoCal stuff I watch. This might be why I generally prefer any random show from the Midwest to the Ring of Honor product most of the time. At any rate, Claudio armdrags Mark. He goes for a clothesline, but Mark ducks it and takes him over with a Northern Lights suplex. Claudio hangs on, though, turning it into a front facelock.

Sydal tags in. Mark escapes a headlock and makes a tag as well. Sydal and Jay trade hiptoss attempts, with Sydal finally taking him down with a headscissors. He goes for a clothesline, but Jay ducks it and connects with one of his own. Sydal reverses him into the corner, but runs into a back elbow. Not to worry, though, as he comes right back with a spinning heel kick. Tag to Claudio, who picks up a quick one count. Jay drives him backwards into the corner and makes the tag. They whip Claudio into the corner. Mark charges in with a dropkick and Jay follows with a big boot. Claudio is out at one.

He tags Sydal and they give Mark the old wishbone spot on the mat. Sydal snapmares him and scores with the cannonball legdrop. Mark comes back with strikes and makes the tag. Jay nails Sydal in the back of the head with a leg lariat, causing him to stumble into a jawbreaker from Mark. Briscoes follow with a Downward Spiral/bulldog combo. Jay makes the cover, picking up a nearfall. Dropkick by Jay for another two count. Tag to Mark. Jay lifts Sydal for a suplex, dropping his feet onto Mark's shoulders. They basically just toss him skyward and Sydal crashes hard to the mat. Cover gets two.

Mark plants him with a gutwrench suplex, then drops a knee for yet another nearfall. This is another one of my general complaints about ROH. Too many nearfalls. It's actually okay in a really fast paced match like this, but when it's match in and match out up and down the card, it's just overkill. Anyway, Jay tags in. Briscoes connect with their double shoulderblock spot and Jay locks Sydal in the Stretch Plum. He shoves Sydal into the Briscoe's corner. He tries to fight out, but Jay plants him with a quebradora. He gives Sydal a backbreaker, holding Sydal across his knee. Mark then comes in with a corkscrew split legged moonsault!

Mark tags in. He throws Sydal with a belly to belly and gets two. Tag to Jay. They whip Sydal into the corner. Mark charges, but gets backdropped to the floor. Sydal then ducks a running big boot and sits Jay up top. He leaps from the mat, taking Jay off the top with a 'rana! Claudio tags in, catching Jay with a flurry of European uppercuts. He slams him, then follows with a crab walk elbow for two. Irish whip by Claudio, but Jay hangs onto the ropes. He sends Claudio into the ropes with a drop toehold and Mark kicks him in the head.

Slingshot doublestomp by Mark. Sydal runs in. The Briscoes duck his clothesline and give him a HUGE biel out of the corner. They like it so much that Claudio gets the same. Jay whips Mark toward Sydal, who comes back with a kick. Jay then charges, but Claudio comes off the ropes, connecting with a back elbow. Sydal hits a step up enzuigiri on Mark as Claudio covers Jay for a nearfall. Fisherman's suplex follows and Claudio again gets two. Tag to Sydal. He locks Jay in a seated abdominal stretch for a bit, then tags Claudio back in. Tumbling European uppercut in the corner by Claudio. He whips Sydal into Jay and he connects with a double knee strike.

Claudio with a giant swing! Oh hell yeah! He only gets ten revolutions, though. Cover gets two. Sydal tags in and plants Jay with a springboard tornado bulldog. He follows with a springboard twisting moonsault and gets two. Tag to Double C. He comes in with a slingshot elbowdrop for another nearfall. Tag to Sydal. Claudio sits Jay up top and they go for a double superplex. Jay shoves Claudio to the mat and hits a flipping hangman's neckbreaker on Sydal! Wicked. He drops Claudio with a Stunner and makes the tag.

Mark catches Claudio with a springboard dropkick. He hammers on Sydal and drops him with an enzuigiri. He sends Claudio into the ropes and Jay ends up monkey flipping him over the top and out! He follows him out, nailing him with a somersault plancha! Back in the ring, Sydal reverses Mark into the corner. Mark leaps to the second rope. Sydal charges, blocking a boot. Mark shrugs off another 'rana attempt and goes for a sunset flip. He rolls through, though, hoisting Sydal up and powerbombing him into the corner. He follows with an Exploder and gets two.

Briscoes work a little double team, planting Sydal with a sideslam/top rope legdrop combo. Cover, of course, only gets two. They try to give Claudio a double whip, but he ends up slamming them together. He drops Mark with a kick, then slams Jay on top of him. Sydal is on top of the pile for a cover, but still…only two. Claudio tags in, spiking Mark with the Alpamare Waterslide (similar to an Olympic Slam). He covers Mark, but Jay is in to make the save. Claudio whips Mark into the corner and he leaps to the second rope once again.

He kicks Claudio, who charges back in, runs up the ropes and takes Mark over with a headscissors takedown. He follows with a big boot and gets two. Tag to Sydal. Claudio gives Mark a backbreaker and Sydal follows up with his Slice Drop (He drapes his leg across the opponent's chest and drops to the mat) for two. Standing moonsault also gets two. Claudio tags back in, whipping Mark into the corner. Mark floats over him. He ducks a clothesline and comes off the second rope with a diving forearm. Tag to Jay! He comes off the top with a crossbody. If you guessed anything other than a two count, you just haven't been paying attention.

Jay shortarms Claudio, planting him with a sitout gourdbuster. He lifts Claudio, allowing Mark to come in with a springboard leg lariat. He adds a corkscrew splash for good measure. Jay covers and you know the drill. Claudio ducks a boot and tries to kill Jay with a diving springboard European uppercut. Jay rolls out. Sydal comes in, diving off of Claudio's shoulders onto the Briscoes on the floor! He tosses Jay in and Claudio plants him with the Ricola Bomb (cross arm sitout powerbomb) for two. Mark makes the save. At two, of course.

Claudio tosses Mark out and levels Jay with a European uppercut. Tag to Sydal, who scores with a Shooting Star Press. Cover, but Mark is in once again to make the save. Claudio peppers him with European uppercuts, but ends up eating a superkick. Mark lifts him for the Cutthroat Driver (arm trap Burning Hammer), but Sydal breaks it up. Mark nails him with a superkick and clotheslines Claudio over the top. Jay presses Sydal, dropping him into a Death Valley Driver.

Plancha onto Claudio by Mark! In the ring, Jay sets up for the Jay Driller, but Sydal blocks. He hoists him up for a second attempt, but Sydal flips through into a 'rana for two. He goes for a kick, but Jay ducks it and lifts him onto his shoulders. The Briscoes score with a springboard Doomsday lariat! Jay makes the cover and picks up the win!

Great, great match. I'd actually call it a low end match of the year candidate, but I seem to be the only person rating it that highly. It must have been the right match at the right time for me. The zillion and six nearfalls did hurt it a bit, but overall this was just an awesome sprint from start to end.

-Postmatch, the announcers run down upcoming shows as the Briscoes chill in the ring. Tomfoolery awaits, I bet! As soon as I write that, El Generico and Kevin Steen hit the announce position, wondering when they'll be getting a shot at the tag belts. They charge the ring and it's go time! A cast of thousands run out to break them up. Mark Briscoe dives onto the pile in order to go after Generico. The Briscoes are finally escorted out and Steen/Generico start beating the shit out of anyone left in the ring. Steenalizer (powerbomb lift, where you then cradle the head and throw the opponent backwards into more of a suplex type move…often into the corner) on some poor sap who gets in the way!

Some other random ROH student takes a Package Piledriver from Steen, rolled into a Generico Brainbuster! Goddamn, was that ever lethal. Generico dives onto the pile. Everyone brawls to the back, with the cameras in hot pursuit. Steen splatters Mark's skull with a chairshot and leaves him laying. Seriously, this is the best pull apart sequence I've seen in *years*. Words can't describe how heated this was. Amazing segment. Kevin Steen is such a dickhead. I've never really cared for him as a wrestler (a bit too headdroppy for my taste, though I understand he's improved quite a bit), but he's a hell of a heel. He works mostly for companies I don't watch, so I'm looking forward to seeing how good he's gotten over the past year or so.

-Clips from the Fifth Year Festival: Philly show highlight Roderick Strong yanking Delirious off the top rope, causing him to land on the back of his head, knocking him out. Roddy then proceeds to plant him with a Gibson (Tiger) Driver onto a section of railing on the floor.

Roderick Strong v. Delirious -

Delirious goes berserk when the bell rings, of course. Makes you wonder what happens when his doorbell rings. Assuming that he doesn't live in a cave, I guess. He is half lizard, after all. Match opens on the floor with Delirious laying in headbutts. He rolls Roddy in, then gets cut off when he tries to follow. Delirious shoots him into the ropes, but gets tackled. He literally works circles around Roddy, finally hoisting Strong onto his shoulders and dropping him facefirst to the mat. He tries to punt his head off, but Roddy avoids it and puts him in the Stronghold (elevated Boston Crab). Delirious counters into a rollup and gets two.

Strong lifts him for a slam, but Delirious slips away and takes him over with a snapmare. Spine kick follows. He goes for a whip, but Roddy reverses him into the corner. He charges, running into a boot. Delirious comes off the top and snaps off a 'rana. Now it's his turn to charge. Roddy's turn to counter, as well, as he elevates Delirious onto the top turnbuckles and starts laying in chops. Corner whip by Strong. Delirious rebounds out with a clothesline. He plants Strong with a back suplex and gets two. He whips Strong into the corner, but there's no one home on the charge.

Roddy avoids another charge and just annihilates Delirious with a swinging backbreaker (almost looked like a Black Hole Slam onto his knee). Cover gets two. Delirious fires back, but charges into a boot in the corner. He reverses Roddy into the opposite corner, but again charges into a kick. Strong comes off the second with something or another, but Delirious meets him with a headbutt to the gut. He ducks a clothesline from Strong and comes back with three of his own. Delirious catches him with a dropkick to the back, sending Strong into the corner. PANIC ATTACK!

Delirious heads up top, presumably looking for Shadows Over Hell. They do a call back from their earlier match, as Strong again yanks him off the top. This time, though, Delirious rolls to his feet. He turns and Strong buries a knee in his gut. Delirious quickly recovers, spiking Roddy with a Bizarro Driver (basically a Fisherman's Michinoku Driver, though he cradles the inside leg) for two. He gets the Cobra Clutch locked in, but before he can turn it into the Cobra Stretch, Roddy drives him backwards into the corner to break. He whips Delirious into the opposite corner, but wouldn't you know it…the ensuing charge misses!

Delirious sits Roddy up top and plants him with a neckbreaker. He covers, but Strong is out at two. He manages to cut Delirious off with a jawbreaker, then lifts him onto his shoulder in a Torture Rack. He spins that into a backbreaker and picks up a nearfall. He follows with a fallaway slam off the second rope, but Delirious won't stay down for three. He counters a move into a crucifix, but Strong kicks out at two. Enzuigiri by Delirious. Up top he goes. Roddy cuts him off, but Delirious manages to shove him to the mat. Shadows Over Hell connects! Nearfall for Delirious.

Delirious floats into the Cobra Stretch, which transitions into a rollup sequence that neither man gets the better of. Roddy ends up powering Delirious up, then powerbombs him across his knees. That looked all sorts of painful. Roddy covers, but Delirious reaches the ropes. Both guys end up on the apron. Strong tries to lift him, but Delirious flips back into the ring. He dropkicks Roddy in the knees, causing him bump off the apron and hit his head. Somersault plancha by Delirious! He whips Strong into the rail…Panic Attack! He comes up clutching his knee, though.

Delirious rolls Strong in and climbs onto the apron. He catches Roddy with a back elbow and goes for a sunset flip. Roddy kicks him in the face, though. He climbs onto the apron and hoists Delirious up, dropping him straight down onto the very edge of the apron. Strong rolls him in and gets a two count. He hooks Delirious for a Gibson Driver (named after James Gibson/Jamie Noble, for whatever it's worth), but it's blocked. They trade strikes for a few seconds and Strong cuts him off with an eye rake.

Delirious comes back with an elbow strike. He bounces off the ropes, but Roddy lifts him onto his shoulder and connects with his gutbuster across the knees (almost a sitout variation of a Go 2 Sleep) Cover gets two. Stronghold is locked in, but Delirious reaches the ropes! Strong goes for his Half Nelson Backbreaker, but Delirious slips free and plants him with Chemical Imbalance II (I guess calling it a sitout double pumphandle driver will suffice) ! Cover, but Strong escapes at two! Cobra Stretch by Delirious!

Roddy manages to fight to his feet…Cobra Clutch suplex by Delirious! He makes the cover, but Strong reaches the ropes. They mistimed a spot where Delirious tries to punt Roddy's head off a bit and he continues to pound Strong down. He goes for a clothesline, but Strong ducks it and hits the Half Nelson backbreaker! He follows up with his big running boot, then quickly plants Delirious with the Gibson Driver to pick up the win!

There was something about this that was slightly off. Still a really fun match (as if there's any other sort of match involving Delirious), though. Far too much focus on corner transitions. It felt like half the match was just corner whips and missed charges. What I did like is that Delirious put Strong on the defensive immediately. It was a grudge match and he went in pissed off and ready to go. I think, traditionally, you'd expect an ROH match between these two to mostly be Delirious bumping around for Roddy's offense, but that wasn't the case here…

-Postmatch, Roddy's fellow No Remorse Corp members Davey Richards and Rocky Romero come out, carrying a section of railing. They beat Delirious down and bridge the section of railing between the apron and rail. Gibson Driver onto the railing! Erick Stevens (member of the Resilience, the counter NRC group) comes out. He catches Richards with a clothesline in the corner. TKO to Romero! He trades strikes with Roddy, then elevates him for a flapjack, then catching and powerslamming him. The NRC quickly get outta Dodge.

-Great Adam Pearce promo, talking about the history of ROH and how it's grown over the years. He says that the wrestlers have to step and ask themselves what they're willing to do to take their piece of the ROH pie, so to speak. We see BJ Whitmer in the background, sitting down with his head in his hands. Pearce talks about how Whitmer will always be known as the guy who lost the first ROH match on PPV. Pearce wonders how he'll ever find peace and says that he'll have to dig deep and find out exactly what he's capable of. Pearce knows what *he's* capable of and soon…so will we. He walks up to Whitmer and consoles him.

Pearce can pretty much do no wrong as far as I'm concerned. Great old school heel in the ring and he can just talk for days. I'm surprised that he's never gotten a shot with WWE. He's big enough. He has a decent look. One of those pro wrestling mysteries, I guess.

KENTA & Nigel McGuinness v. "American Dragon" Bryan Danielson & Takeshi Morishima -

KENTA and Dragon open the match. We get the stupid standoff sequence out of the way immediately and then they start working out of a test of strength. Dragon monkey flips KENTA, then sends him into the ropes. He tries to leapfrog him, but KENTA lays in a stiff kick to the chest. He's apparently not in the mood to be cute tonight. Both guys tag. Nigel grabs a side headlock. Morishima shoots him into the ropes. They collide, but neither go down. Nigel bounces off the ropes and we get another collision with no one budging. Morishima ducks a clothesline and tackles him. He grabs a front facelock and makes the tag to Danielson.

We get some matwork which leads to a jujigatame by Dragon. Nigel reaches the ropes. He grabs a hammerlock and blasts Dragon with a European uppercut. He sits Dragon up top. Nigel avoids a few strikes and ends up backing off a bit. Morishima distracts him, allowing Danielson to come off the second rope with a European uppercut of his own. He reminds us that he is indeed the best wrestler in the world. Nigel, however, disagrees. With a headbutt. He wins that round. Morishima runs in and levels Nigel with a lariat. That brings KENTA in, of course. Big boot has no effect, but a second manages to drop Morishima.

KENTA tries to kick Danielson, but he catches it and takes him down with a Dragon Screw. We get a four way standoff (!) and I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. The ref boots KENTA/Morishima, but Dragon just tags him in anyway. Butt Butt by Morishima! He chokes Nigel in the corner and tags Dragon back in. Morishima stands on Nigel's throat. Danielson climbs onto Morishima's back to add just a bit more pressure. Ref reminds them of the rules and Danielson reminds him that they have 'til five, referee! For a guy that people say has no charisma, Danielson sure has this entire crowd in the palm of his hand.

On commentary, Dave Prazak is talking about past ROH champions, which is just a cheap excuse to mention CM Punk/Homicide/Austin Aries and Samoa Joe. What…Low Ki and James Gibson aren't famous enough? And poor, poor Xavier gets no love at all. Heh. Anyway, Dragon snapmares Nigel and kicks him in the spine. He briefly locks a Dragon Sleeper, then tags Morishima. He snapmares Nigel as well. Spine kick time? Nope. Try a rolling ass attack instead! He follows with a double stomp, then stands on Nigel's chest, picking up a nearfall. Heels double team Nigel, just to be dicks.

Morishima locks Nigel in a camel clutch. Tag to Danielson. He sets up for the surfboard, but decided to just stomp down on the back of Nigel's knees instead. Love that move. He starts kicking away at Nigel, but all that's doing is firing him up. Dragon whips him into the corner, but misses a charge. Nigel plants him with his corner combo, kicking him hard in the back and dropping him with a lariat. Morishima runs in, nailing him with a forearm. Nigel rebounds, ducking a clothesline and delivering one of his own KENTA tags in. He lays in some kicks on Dragon. He follows with a springboard dropkick and gets two.

KENTA lifts Dragon for a back suplex. He rolls through to his feet and comes back with some forearms. He bounces off the ropes, but KENTA catches him with a leg lariat. They trade strikes and KENTA sends Danielson into the corner with a spin kick to the gut. Whip to the opposite corner. Dragon runs up the ropes and backflips over KENTA, then proceeds to plant him with a backbreaker. Tag to Morishima. He whips KENTA into the corner and hits a handspring forearm! He heads up top and connects with a missile dropkick. He sets up for the Backdrop Driver, but KENTA manages to elbow free.

KENTA bounces off the ropes, but Morishima scoops him up and plants him with a sideslam. Now it's Morishima who's bouncing off the ropes. KENTA kicks him…no effect. He bounces off the ropes again, and KENTA muscles him over with a powerslam. Tag to Nigel. He corners Morishima with strikes and connects with a charging Euro. uppercut. Morishima ducks a shortarm clothesline and goes for the Backdrop Driver. Nigel elbows free, but ends up running into a big boot. Morishima is up top once again and his second missile dropkick is just as successful as the first…

Or…maybe not. Nigel has FIGHTING SPIRIT! He immediately pops up and levels Morishima with a lariat. Cover gets two. Nigel goes for a whip, but gets reversed into the corner. Morishima is looking for a handspring something or another, but eats another lariat for his troubles. Cover gets two. Some really repetitive sequences here. Nigel climbs up top. Dragon grabs his ankle, but KENTA will have none of that, running in and knocking Dragon off the apron with a kick. They brawl on the floor. In the ring, Morishima sets up for a superplex.

Nigel counters, looking for a Sunset bomb. Dragon grabs Morishima and manages to block the move. Morishima then sits straight down and just smears Nigel into the mat. Ouch. On the floor, KENTA reverses a whip, sending Danielson into the rail. Back inside, Morishima pounds on Nigel, sending him into the ropes. Morishima ducks the rebound lariat (called the Jawbreaker now?) and plants him with a Backdrop Driver! He covers, but KENTA makes the save. Morishima tosses him out and heads up top once again. Nigel cuts him off this time. Tower of London connects! Both guys end up tagging.

KENTA lifts Danielson for a suplex, then just drops him across the top rope. He comes off the top with a knee strike while Dragon is hung up in the ropes. Cover gets two. KENTA rush by, err…KENTA. He bounces off the ropes, but ends up eating a forearm. Dragon with a Dragon suplex, but KENTA is out at two. Crossface Chickenwing is locked in. KENTA fights to his feet. He kicks out of the corner and lands on top (think Bret/Austin - Survivor Series '96). Dragon has to release and just barely gets a shoulder up at two.

Danielson sits KENTA up top, setting up for his back superplex. Nigel cuts him off and powerbombs him, though. That brings in Morishima. KENTA leaps off the top, but gets caught by Morishima. He plants KENTA with a release Northern Lights suplex of sorts. Elsewhere, Nigel crotches Dragon in the ropes and catches him with a lariat. Morishima tosses him out and follows him to the floor. He tries to roll him in, but Nigel rebounds off the ropes *outside* of the ring and hits a lariat. I've never seen that variation before!

Nigel tosses Morishima into the crowd. He comes off the top with a crossbody over the rail. He's a big boy to be doing stuff like that. In the ring, Dragon takes KENTA over with a snap suplex. Nigel rolls into the ring and he and Danielson go nose to nose. There's a lot of history there. They trade strikes and Dragon kicks at Nigel's injured arm. He rolls out. Dragon refocuses on KENTA, coming off the top. KENTA gets him with a boot, though. Busaiku Knee kick by KENTA gets two.

KENTA hits the "original" (so sez Prazak) Go 2 Sleep on Danielson and goes for the cover. Morishima is in with a lazy save. Remember when you actually had to yank the guy making the cover off of your partner for it to be considered a save. These days, you just have to breathe on the guy, apparently. It's another one of those, "things about wrestling that annoy Shane" moments! At any rate, Morishima dumps KENTA with a uranage.

At ringside, trainers are taping up Nigel's elbow. Ooh…dramatic! In the ring, Danielson connects with a diving headbutt on KENTA. Cover gets two. Morishima holds KENTA up, allowing Danielson to catch him with a roaring forearm strike. Lariat by Morishima is good for a nearfall. He hoists KENTA onto his shoulders as Dragon heads up top. Nigel comes in and breaks this up. He nails Morishima with a forearm, further injuring the elbow. He follows with the rebound lariat, again using his bad arm. Morishima is out.

KENTA leaps to the top rope with Dragon. Super Falcon Arrow! He covers, but Dragon escapes at two. Danielson catches a clothesline and locks KENTA in the crossface chickenwing. KENTA tries to kick out of the corner, but Dragon sits him up top and scores with his back superplex for a nearfall. Cattle Mutilation is locked on! KENTA won't tap. Dragon releases and lays in the MMA elbows.

KENTA comes back, lifting him up for the G2S. Danielson catches the knee strike and counters into a Tiger suplex! KENTA escapes at two. Danielson immediately rolls into the Cattle Mutilation. Morishima cuts off any save attempts. KENTA tries to gut it out, but he eventually taps out…

Excellent match. It was a bit too FIGHTING SPIRIT-y for me, but most of the big ROH matches are. Nigel and Dragon are on a completely different level than pretty much everyone on the indy scene. And what can I say about KENTA that hasn't been said a thousand times already. Morishima is a wrecking ball, so all of this ended up tying together. Maybe even a bit better than I expected.

-Postmatch, Dragon picks up the ROH belt. He fawns over it just a tad too much, though, so Morishima plants him with a Backdrop Driver! Nigel picks up the belt. He's just innocently handing it to the champ, but ends up eating a lariat. The champ stands tall, belt in mouth (?!) as we fade out.

I don't think I've ever hidden the fact that I just don't care much for the ROH product. It's too serious, the fans suck, some of the match run way longer than they need to, too much fascination with various stars from Japan and an overall NOAH-lite feel have kept me from really getting into it. I do enjoy it and end up catching pretty much every show (just got everything from Final Battle '06 through Fighting Spirit in today, actually), but it's well behind CHIKARA, IWA:MS and maybe even PWG on my indy wrestling depth chart.

All of that said, this was a *great* show and a really good primer on the ROH product. Just the sort of thing they needed to deliver to the PPV audience that may well be seeing their product for the first time. I'm only up to the Glory By Honor V shows right now, so I also have to mention that between then and now, the production has picked up as well. The show looked much better than normal and that's something else small that will help out *a lot*. All in all, this show is well worth looking into if the current WWE/TNA scene is boring you. You rarely fail to get some good to great wrestling on their shows and in the end, that might be what pushes them forward in the months and years to come…

Friday Night SmackDown! 7/27/2007: For and Against

2007-07-29T02:09:00.000-05:00

AGAINST: Khali's having a title celebration?

FOR: Oooh. Continuity.

FOR: Batista making the "Call me" motion to Chery post-match. JBL: "She must be an animal lover."

FOR: The explanation for Hornswoggle's eligibility in the match is actually kind of ingenious.

FOR: Noble's promo. (Who's Max?)

AGAINST: Hornswoggle has an entrance?

FOR: Noble pointing downwards. He knows what's up.

AGAINST: Is he biting his knee pad?

FOR: JBL: "This could be the shortest championship reign ever."

UM: What's with all the countouts recently?

FOR: Chavo's knee stretch.

AGAINST: Is "tenaciousness" a word, Cole?

FOR: Chavo: "Me?" JBL: "I've seen that before somewhere."

FOR: This match got good at the halfway point.

FOR: BRAINBUSTER.

FOR: More continuity with the Hardy/Masters match two weeks ago.

FOR: Was the Bash the first time Matt and Jeff have worked separate singles matches on the same show? I think it might be.

FOR: MVP's reaction to Flair chopping Masters.

AGAINST: Did MVP just bail out on Masters?

FOR: Yep. And there's a replay, even.

FOR: Matt's effectively challenging MVP to prop bets? This could get good.

AGAINST: That wasn't smart.

FOR: Cole: "I don't think Dave should have done that."

FOR: Torrie's cowgirl outfit.

FOR: We got cruiserweights all over this show tonight. JBL: "Did he have Torrie Wilson on a leash?"

AGAINST: JBL's delusions.

FOR: JBL: "If she were more normal, Victoria would be absolutely, completely crazy."

FOR: Kenny running around the ring, knocking Yang off the apron, then ducking down and crawling back to his corner to pop up when Robinson turns to see him.

AGAINST: On top of everything else, I'm disappointed Khali's not wearing a suit.

AGAINST: What?

AGAINST: Did he really compare Khali to Gandhi?

AGAINST: HE CAN'T EVEN DANCE.

AGAINST: Does JBL know Khali said "No?"

Friday Night SmackDown! 7/20/2007: For and Against

2007-07-22T02:39:00.000-05:00

FOR: The crowd cheering Edge having to give up the title.

AGAINST: Not only is that thing cursed, but it's kind of a symbol of when everything went south.

FOR: LOL at Edge claiming Kane's depriving the people of watching him.

AGAINST: What the hell song is this?

FOR: Oh.

FOR: Ah, the battle royal trick. They've gone to this well before.

FOR: The fans waving good-bye.

FOR: Victoria clipping Torrie's leg.

FOR: Victoria yelling at the crowd.

FOR: The Widow's Peak.

AGAINST: They're doing the battle royal now? Well, I guess they need a challenger for the winner or something.

FOR: Cole bringing up how Batista had to forfeit the title also AND how he couldn't face Edge for the title any more.

FOR: And again, entrances are reserved only for the people that matter.

FOR: I'm surprised Funaki lasted this long.

AGAINST: Why'd they all pick Henry to gang up on?

FOR: Kenny and Deuce celebrating.

FOR: The Noble elimination.

AGAINST: Doing essentially the same thing with the Eugene elimination.

FOR: The MVP/Matt Hardy mini-battle.

FOR: The Chavo/Yang/Masters sequence.

AGAINST: Why isn't Flair in this?

AGAINST: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

AGAINST: I just died a little inside.

FOR: Batista accepting his open challenge is still on, right? Please say yes. Please?

AGAINST: The translator does have a name. Something Singh. I haven't been able to pin it down yet.

FOR: The crowd is shitting all over this.

AGAINST: What's wrong with being a doctor?

AGAINST: Cole respects JBL?

FOR: JBL's response: "You should. 'Cause I'll slap you out of that chair." "Oh, quit sucking up."

FOR: Cole countering JBL's point with Matt Hardy.

FOR: Kenny's slingshot whatever-that-was.

FOR: About time they brought up the Spirit Squad.

FOR: Second-rope Twist of Fate.

AGAINST: The referee calling Batista and Kane "gentlemen".

FOR: JBL: "I was a really good champion."

AGAINST: Here's Khali to interfere.

FOR: And here's Long to make the Triple Threat match.

FOR: Batista, Cena, MVP, TAFKA Nitro, Candice, Umaga, Orton, Sandman, Chavo.

ECW on Sci-Fi (7.17.07)

2007-07-17T23:56:00.000-05:00

-The announcers open the show with some breaking news. Apparently, Johnny Nitro has called a press conference for later tonight. We get a shot of his dressing room, which is swarming with press, curious about this life altering news! Some dude (who probably had a name, though they didn't care to share it with us) walks out and tells us that tonight will be the last time we ever see Johnny Nitro in ECW. Oh! All of our questions will be answered soon enough. Thank god, as the stress is just killing me.

CM Punk v. Elijah Burke -

Rumor has it that the main event was supposed to be Punk versus Cor Van, but that MCV didn't show up for some reason. We'll have to wait and see how that plays out. I hope he's not leaving. I doubly hope he's not going back to TNA. He had more charisma as Monty Brown, but the matches were the shits. I'll also point out that ECW needs to add a name or six, as this match is bordering on being done to death, but really…who else do they have to throw out there. ECW barely has a roster to speak of, so losing Cor Van would be rough. So I repeat, for the million and third time. VAL VENIS + ECW = AWESOME! Good god, make it happen!

Burke gets up in Punk's grill and talks shit. Punk is mildly amused. Burke ends up backing down. He should have punched him right in the face instead. Entertainment! As it were, no one can come up with an early advantage. Punk goes to work out of a knucklelock and focuses on Burke's arm. He lays in a kick to the shoulder, hammerlocks him and drives him into the corner. Cover gets two. He slams Burke, then drops a leg for another quick nearfall. Burke backs him into the corner and takes over with a kick to the gut.

He takes Punk down with a snapmare and drops an elbow. He covers, but Punk is out at two. Suplex attempt by Burke. Punk blocks and reverses into one of his own. Cover gets two. He goes back to working on the arm. He whips Burke into the corner, but runs into a boot. Burke flips backwards over the top, hooking Punk's arms with his legs. Both of them end up spilling to the floor.

-Commercials

Back from the break, Burke is in control. He has Punk locked in a half crab. He drops some elbows to the back and picks up a two count. Full Boston crab this time, but Punk reaches the ropes. He kicks Burke away and comes back with a series of strikes. He bounces off the rope for that move that everyone is going for when they're unfortunately cut off…in this case by a gut shot. Burke snapmares him and connects with a diving forearm to the back. Backbreaker gets two.

He plants Punk with a vertical suplex then rolls to his feet, slamming him. Punk comes back with strikes and dumps him to the mat with a flapjack. He goes for a suplex, but Burke slips away and scores with a Saito suplex of his own. Cover gets two. He goes for a clothesline, but Punk blocks it and DDTs him for two. Burke comes back with a German suplex, but can only get two. He starts pounding on Punk, looking for the clothesline. Punk catches it, hoists him up and hits the GTS for the win.

We've seen better between these two. Punk seemed a bit strike happy tonight and neither guy really seemed to be all that into it. Didn't help that the crowd was practically comatose.

-Big Daddy V is up next! Put the women and children to bed, as this won't be pretty.

-Commercials

-They run a video package for the Cena/Lashley match at the Bash. We get comments from Steve Austin, Batista, Ric Flair, Mick Foley and JBL.

-They follow this with clips from Raw. Lashley would be better served if he showed *any* emotion at all. Seriously…blink your friggin' eyes at least. He doesn't look intense. He looks disinterested.

-Matt Striker is out. He shows us the clips of Big Daddy V's debut last week.

Big Daddy V v. Tim Storm -

Vis lays in some headbutts. He's jiggling' more than Abdullah the Butcher. Seriously. It's almost captivating in a sick sort of way. Big splash in the corner. Samoan Drop. He finishes with a swinging sidewalk slam (or we could just call it a Black Hole Slam, if we want to be realistic). Mabel by any other name still sucks.

-Tonight, Dreamer faces Kevin Thorn. Also, that press conference dealie. I can't contain my excitement!

-Commercials

-Miz is in the ring. He talks about how all women want him. He brings out Extreme Expose, who apparently have a surprise for him. They give him a lap dance. Lots of the rubbing of their girl parts on Miz's (presumably) boy parts. Song was "Like A Man" by Ciara, for those who keep track of such things.

-Boy, this show is the shits so far. If they don't care, why should I?

-Clips of the Extreme Rules match between Dreamer/Nitro from last week. Looked like a fun brawl. I'm sorry I missed it.

-Dreamer gets his intro. Ooh…that's never a good sign.

-Commercials

Tommy Dreamer v. Kevin Thorn -

This is exactly what you'd expect it to be. They brawled for a bit. Thorn worked over Dreamer's injured arm. Dreamer hits a bunch of neckbreakers. He blocks the Original Sin. He even connects with his fat guy frogsplash that, somewhere, made RVD giggle. Thorn eventually posts him shoulder first and gets the win. Postmatch, Thorn spikes him with an Original Sin.

I should watch this show in fast forward every week.

-Nitro is next. Or not, since we've been told that we'll never see him in ECW again. I smell tomfoolery!

-Commercials

-The nameless dude tells us that Nitro has changed his name. He comes out and tells us that his name is John Morrison. Because he kinda sorta looks a little bit like Jim Morrison, you see. If you squint your eyes. Really hard. And actually look at a picture of Jim Morrison instead. He runs down his various accomplishments in life (he was running at eight months old and skipped the first grade. He was even voted class president and he DIDN'T EVEN RUN!). He ponders the meaning of CM in Punk's name. Chick Master? Chases Men? Cookie Monster? Common Man? Completely Miserable? That last one is how this show is making me feel. Punk comes out. They decide not to let him talk because they're a bunch of boneheaded retards. Morrison blasts him with the mic and plants him with the corkscrew neckbreaker to put this show out of it's misery.

If that was supposed to hype the PPV…it failed.

Friday Night SmackDown 7/13/2007: For and Against

2007-07-16T04:15:00.000-05:00

FOR: That's a new way to start the show.

AGAINST: A party and a contract signing? What is this, Raw?

FOR: MVP: "Humble? What does that mean? Humble's a place in Texas, isn't it?"

AGAINST: That's a terrible spot to go to commercial.

AGAINST: See?

FOR: They've really gotten the Twist of Fate over in recent weeks.

AGAINST: JBL saying "Ball-in."

AGAINST: JBL seems awful subdued tonight.

FOR: JBL: "I spent a month here one weekend."

FOR: Finlay lying across Yang's back while keeping the armlock on.

FOR: JBL: "It's a back body drop; the body dropped."

AGAINST: The hell? Hornswaggle?

FOR: The Majors' double leapfrog.

FOR: JBL: "MVP is right. You media types make me sick."

FOR: Brett's enziguiri taking out both Chavo and Noble.

FOR: Vickie standing her ground.

FOR: That metal door's getting quite a workout.

FOR: Batista's almost laughing.

AGAINST: This is helping no one.

FOR: The steps-throwing exhibition.

FOR: Luke Hawks(sp)? Sounds familiar. WSX guy? Shane?

FOR: This is gonna be a first, right? Two opponents making the same ring entrance?

AGAINST: What? I thought Deuce was Eugene's opponent.

FOR: Oh SNAP.

FOR: JBL: "I sense a little animosity here."

AGAINST: Cole's really overdoing it with the righteous indignation tonight.

AGAINST: Rollerblading?

FOR: Nice outfit, though.

FOR: Crazy Victoria rules.

FOR: Did they just hire all-new referees or something? This guy looks like a young Nick Patrick.

FOR: JBL: "This is the closest you've ever been to a woman this sexy." Cole: "And I'm still pretty far away."

FOR: Ahahahaha. Torrie doesn't even know what happened.

AGAINST: Nice hat, Edge.

AGAINST: He's a worse dancer than Jericho.

AGAINST: I can't endorse the guys in costumes running interference.

FOR: The kids laughing in the audience.

ECW on Sci-Fi (7.10.07)

2007-07-15T17:48:00.000-05:00

-So much for "This Is Extreme," as they've already replaced it with a new intro. I believe it's a reworked version of "This Is the New Shit" by Marilyn Manson. It's definitely Manson, at any rate.

-Later tonight, it's a rematch from last week. Dreamer versus Nitro. This week, though, it's Extreme Rules.

-Striker's Classroom segment. His guest is Boogeyman. Striker has an offering of a bowl full of worms. He runs down some wormy factoids, then tells Boogey that the games end tonight. He brings out Viscera (called "Big Daddy V") who's dumped the pajamas for an early Tommy Dreamer tights and suspenders look. Put a shirt on, brah. Jeez. He slams Boogey HARD onto Striker's desk and tosses him through the blackboard. Wow. That was total annihilation. Not a bad way to re-debut him, I guess.

Elijah Burke v. Balls Mahoney -

They trade strikes, with Burke's more disciplined punching winning out over Balls' barroom brawling. He chokes Balls for a bit and hits his handstand elbow out of the corner. Cover gets two. He locks Balls in a Cobra Clutch. Balls elbows free and follows up with a pair of clotheslines. He slams Burke and heads up top. As usual, there's no water in the pool for the legdrop. Burke quickly drops him with the Elijah Express and gets the win.

-The play a really nice Tommy Dreamer video package chock full of footage from the "real" ECW.

-CM Punk is next!

-Commercials

CM Punk v. Stevie Richards -

Stevie's (imaginary) King of Heat title is not on the line tonight! We open with a mirror sequence, as both guys run through a quick armdrag, follow with a legsweep and each pick up a one count from it. Punk takes over with a swinging neckbreaker and follows with a big enzuigiri for two. He slams Stevie and drops a leg for another nearfall. Stevie slips away from a slam and kicks Punk hard on the thigh. He follows with a Steviekick to the back of the head, but Punk escapes at two. Boo! Hangman's neckbreaker by Stevie gets him another two count.

He goes for a kick, but Punk catches the foot, take him down and locks in a leg submission. Stevie quickly breaks it up with a kick the face. Simple, but effective! Is it time for the StevieT? Nope. Punk counters out and plants him with a backdrop suplex. He catapults Stevie facefirst into the corner. Running knee strike to the back. Punk follows with the normal running knee strike and adds the bulldog for good measure. Cover gets two. Welcome to Chicago, Motherfucker! gets two.

Punk bounces off the ropes, looking for a clothesline. Stevie catches his arm, turning it into a Downward Spiral. He locks Punk in the Koji Clutch, but Punk manages to reach the ropes and force a break. Stevie goes for a Tornado DDT, but Punk holds on, hoists him up and tells Stevie to GO TO SLEEP! He covers and this one is over.

Fun match with these two, just like always.

-Miz kicks game to K². The other two come up looking to be introduced. Miz tells them that he's in action next, but after the match, he wouldn't object at all to a different type of action. And he's so douchy that they're totally ready to nail him right there.

-Commercials

The Miz v. Nunzio -

Miz takes Nunzio down and…the television switches channels? Huh. Ain't that some shit? I was watching a DVD when I taped this, if I can remember back that far, so I apparently managed to change the channel in the process. Retarded ol' me strikes again. What's sad is that this isn't even the first time I've ever done this. But, uh…I'll take 30 seconds to look up what I missed and comment on it in brief.

-Miz wins with "The Mizard of Oz?" Your guess is as good as mine. Ask Matt...he's had to watch a ton of Miz over the past year. I'm going to say that it's a double moonsault, just for the hell of it.

-Some whores danced. Apparently, to a Beyonce song.

-Nitro beat Dreamer in the hardcore match, pinning him after a drop toehold onto a chair in the corner.

At any rate, I'll try to be less stupid this week, though we all know that's a crap shoot at best.

ECW on Sci-Fi (7.3.07)

2007-07-15T17:17:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the delay. Too much work to do, apparently. Which I'm not even being paid for! Ah...stupidity. It clings to me like, uh...something clingy. And just wait until you see how I fuck up next week's show (coming to a blog near you sometime tonight!). Not a good week for me, intelligence-wise. Heh.

-"Bodies" is no longer the theme of this show, for obvious reasons. Looks like they'll go with the traditional "This Is Extreme" theme for now. They need to go old school and use "Thunderkiss '65" again.

-Johnny Nitro is out for a match. The announcers helpfully explain that Punk and Nitro are responsible for picking the other's opponent for tonight. Nitro has chosen Kevin Thorn. Punk's pick…

Johnny Nitro v. Tommy Dreamer -

Dreamer opens with an armdrag. Nitro fires back with a Euro uppercut, but Dreamer tackles him for a nearfall. He takes Nitro over with a hiptoss and slams him. Nitro drops him with a kick and heads up top. Dreamer cuts him off and Nitro falls gutfirst across the top rope. Dreamer follows with an abdominal stretch and goes to work on the ribs. Backbreaker gets two. Nitro comes back, taking Dreamer down with a "Divorce Court" armbar. He immediately goes to work on the arm. Dreamer ducks a clothesline, though, nailing Nitro with a Cactus Clothesline that sends both of them over the top and to the floor.

Dreamer rolls Nitro back in. He decides to suplex him over the top and back out, but Nitro blocks it and snaps his throat across the top rope. He follows up with a dropkick that sends Dreamer crashing off the apron.

-Commercials

Nitro is back to working the arm when we return, picking up a few nearfalls in the process. Dreamer tries to mount a comeback, but Nitro lays in a few kicks to the bad arm and that's the end of that. He follows with the Capoeira legdrop across the injured arm, but can only get two. Nitro stuffs another Dreamer flurry, this time hitting an absolutely gorgeous arm Stunner. Dreamer manages to lift him up and charge into the corner, but then proceeds to charge into a back elbow. Nitro climbs to the second rope and rides Dreamer to the mat with a knee to the back of the shoulder. Cover gets two.

Nitro looks for his springboard kick, but Dreamer avoids it and levels him with a clothesline. Fallaway slam gets two. He ties Nitro to the Tree of Woe and connects with a running dropkick in the corner. DDT time! No one told Nitro that, though, as he counters free and snaps Dreamer to the mat by his bad arm. He plants him with the corkscrew neckbreaker and gets the win!

Decent enough match. It was a change of pace for Nitro. Good to see he can work a bit more methodically, while mixing in the bigger spots in his arsenal. His stock may just be rising. In my eyes, anyway, since we all know how important *my* respect is. Heh.

-Clips from Raw. Lashley is your new #1 Contender for the WWE Title.

-Commercials

-Boogeyman video package. Why?

-CM Punk video package.

-Commercials

-Extreme Expose returns next week. Yay?

-The replay the Punk/Nitro match from Vengeance to crown a new ECW Champion.

CM Punk v. Johnny Nitro -

Punk lays in some leg kicks at the start of the match. Wish he'd do a bit more of that, as it seems anyone with a pseudo-MMA-ish gimmick would want to use it a bit more. In terms of kayfabery, it would screw up a pro wrestler's gameplan even more than a fighter's. Nitro even busts out the Curt Hennig flip bump in the ropes, so go him! Nitro slaps Punk and bails, drawing him into a chase. Nitro ducks into the ring trying to get the jump on Punk, but he gets tripped up. Punk then connects with a slingshot splash.

Nitro comes back, reversing a whip and sending Punk chestfirst into the corner. Nitro hits his springboard kick on the rebound. He works over Punk's arm on the mat and levels him with a shortarm clothesline. He gives Punk a backbreaker, then immediately pulls him up and chains it into an armbar takedown. He covers and gets two. Back to the arm for Nitro. Punk ducks a clothesline and comes back with a step up enzuigiri. They trade strikes and Punk's going to come out on top there every time.

He signals for the running knee strike in the corner, but ends up running into a back elbow. Nitro quickly covers him (with his feet in the ropes), but Punk is out at two. Pepsi Twist by Punk (sort of a hammerlock that he twists into a lariat) gets two. He lifts Nitro for the GTS, but he elbows free and counters into a sunset flip. Punk won't go over, though. He sits down and gets two.

He follows with his running knee/bulldog combo. Punk climbs onto the apron. Time for the springboard clothesline, I bet. Nitro is as smart as me, as he also sees it coming. He ducks out of the way and Punk rolls into the ropes on the other side of the ring. Nitro stretches him out, with his feet elevated in the ropes, and plants him with the corkscrew neckbreaker. He makes the cover and we have a new ECW champ!

Fun match. It meandered a bit for a match so short, but I definitely enjoyed it.

-Main event is next!

-Commercials

-Miz video package.

CM Punk v. Kevin Thorn

We get the big man v. little man stuff at the start, as Thorn pounds on Punk briefly, until Punk uses his speed to take him down with a legsweep, then follows with a legdrop. He kicks Thorn in the spine and gets a quick two count. Thorn comes back, though, ramming Punk into the corner. Whip to the opposite corner. Punk floats over and starts laying in the leg kicks. He connects with a Harley Race like high knee and gets two. Thorn dumps him out, ramming him into the barricade and ring apron. Thorn rolls in to break the count. He climbs back onto the apron and Punk sweeps his leg, following with a slingshot senton into the ring.

-Commercials

Punk is working the arm when we return from break. Thorn powers him into the corner and pounds on him some more. Whip to the opposite corner. Punk looks for the floatover again, but this time Thorn catches him, dropping him across the top rope. Cover gets two. He plants Punk with a flapjack and follows with a clothesline for another nearfall. He whips Punk into the corner, but charges into a boot. And again. Punk comes off the second with a crossbody, but gets caught. Thorn spikes him in the corner with a powerslam. He goes for a Vader splash, but gets nothing but knees.

Punk takes him down with a drop toehold, sending him facefirst into the corner. KENTA Rush. He hits the running knee/bulldog combo, but can only get two. He heads up top, but Thorn cuts him off and sets up for Original Sin. Punk blocks and follows with a springboard clothesline. Cover gets two. Punk goes for the GTS, but Thorn blocks it and clotheslines him. He goes for the Crucifix powerbomb, but Punk slips away. He nails Thorn with an enzuigiri and quickly rolls him up for the win.

Postmatch, Nitro is out. Thorn jumps Punk, but is quickly disposed of. Nitro decides that maybe tonight isn't the best time to have it out with Punk, so he bails. This was okay. I prefer to see Thorn mauling guys, though. That's certainly playing to his strengths. Let Punk do the finesse stuff with other people.

Friday Night SmackDown! 7/6/2007: For and Against

2007-07-10T00:51:00.001-05:00

FOR: This is a city that cheered Michael Irvin, for fuck's sake. MVP should be right at home.

FOR: And there's the Nowitski slam.

AGAINST: MVP's RVD-esque stalling.

FOR: Test of strength?

AGAINST: The guy in the front row telling MVP to get back in the ring. Who the hell does he think he is?

FOR: JBL talking about the effect of the headbutt on your vision, of all things.

FOR: MVP and Matt throwin' 'bows.

FOR: That's the second week in a row Matt's pulled the Twist out of nowhere.

AGAINST: Flair and Finlay have to have met at some point, right?

AGAINST: What's Edge's problem?

FOR: That catch into the Master Lock was probably the most impressive thing Masters has ever done.

AGAINST: Well, that sucked.

AGAINST: And this is an even bigger mistake.

FOR: JBL: "I'm retired. I'm out. I'm retired."

AGAINST: Festus looks like he's dead.

FOR: Cole doesn't believe it either.

FOR: JBL: "They've met in a few bars."

FOR: The combined age in the ring is > 100.

AGAINST: The combined age in the ring is > 100.

FOR: The "countering chops" bit.

FOR: The "Celtic Knot".

FOR: Flair practically killing Hornswaggle with a chop.

FOR: Now that's a catfight. And if this leads to the return of the 'Psycho Bitch' ... good times, my friends.

AGAINST: This isn't even close to Chuck Palumbo's Smackdown debut.

FOR: Shane's doing a jig nonetheless.

AGAINST: Is that his old entrance video?

FOR: You had to think the roller skates would be a distraction.

AGAINST: We're doing this again?

AGAINST: Don't do it, Dave!

FOR: Serious heat for Khali leaving the ring.

FOR: What's with all the "Edge Sucks!" signs? Something's up.

AGAINST: Kane?

AGAINST: That's... that's just not true.

FOR: Edge barring Kane from his ring? I can guess where this is headed.

Friday Night SmackDown! 6/29/2007: For and Against

2007-07-08T03:41:00.002-05:00

So I had this bit written a couple of weeks ago after the lottery that I forgot to put in my last roundup about how Smackdown losing Chris Benoit really compromises the depth of the brand, ironically much like WCW losing the Radicals gutted its midcard and started the beginning of the end.

Then... well, you know.

I don't know what I can say that hasn't already been said because I just don't know what to say. Watching this story unfold over its first 24 hours or so left me feeling sadder and sicker with every new piece of information that came out. And at the end of it, I'm just left with the same questions I'm sure everyone else has. Questions that can never really be answered.

FOR: Flair!

FOR: Carlito?

FOR: JBL: "I worked for his father in Puerto Rico. He still owes me money."

AGAINST: Would it kill them to just say 'Carlos Colon'?

FOR: Thank you, JBL.

FOR: JBL not getting invited to Tony and Eva's wedding.

FOR: Citizens! Count to ten as I...

AGAINST: ...stop at six?

FOR: Flair releasing the Figure-Four, then dragging Carlito back to the center of the ring and going back to the knee.

AGAINST: The misspelled "Kenedy 3:16" sign.

FOR: JBL: "It was strategic defense."

FOR: Can we call that a Side Effect counter?

FOR: Matt putting his body in between Cade and the ropes after the Twist of Fate.

FOR: This match.

FOR: Funaki lives in San Antonio? What a disconnect THAT is.

AGAINST: Does it at least say "Friday Night Smackdown" on his tights?

AGAINST: It's Howard Marshall, JBL. Pierce is the son.

FOR: Sunset flip German suplex?

AGAINST: What, no chyron for Cryme Tyme?

FOR: Deuce and Domino flipping out after Shad and JTG look at their car.

AGAINST: The APA never did that.

AGAINST: What was JTG going for there?

FOR: 'Briscoe Brothers Chop Shop.'

FOR: Call me crazy, but I like those guys. "Big booty girls? PRICELESS!"

AGAINST: Cole not knowing who Robert Horry is.

AGAINST: Hey, Cole, no cheering in the press box.

AGAINST: Eugene's cape.

FOR: Khali's new interpreter's actually funny. "See ya out there."

FOR: Victoria: "I wasn't warmed up."

FOR: Has Mickie actually gotten hotter in the last few months?

FOR: Victoria's side slam variant.

AGAINST: No one remembers the World League, JBL.

AGAINST: This will end badly. The beginning and the middle won't be all that great, either.

FOR: At least it was short?

FOR: Roberts waiting until the pyro stops before finishing Edge's intro.

FOR: Edge: "Shut up, Cole!"

FOR: This match.

AGAINST: The hell's Batista doing up there?

FOR: Edge looks like he's dead.

ECW on Sci-Fi (6.26.07)

2007-07-01T18:48:00.000-05:00

I wasn't sure if I should even do this recap, to be quite frank. I haven't been much in the mood to watch pro wrestling over the past week, for obvious reasons. For better or worse, I'm basically going to ignore the gigantic elephant in the room. I don't know what to say at this point. Or even how to go about saying it. While it may be possible for some to separate Chris Benoit the character from the man and enjoy all of the great things he did as a wrestler while simultaneously condemning his actions as a man…I'm not sure anyone is ready to travel down that road. Not yet, anyway. It's probably best to just stick to the show in question. We'll let time dictate the rest.

-Vince McMahon opens the show, talking about the Raw tribute and how, 26 hours later, the facts of the entire scenario have been made clearer. The only mention of Chris Benoit on tonight's show will be from Vince himself. He dedicates the show to everyone effected by the events of the past week and calls tonight's show the first step in the healing process. He asks us to let the WWE Superstars do what they do best…entertain us.

John Cena v. Johnny Nitro -

Nitro is the new ECW champion, for whatever that's worth.

Power lockup, with both guys jockeying for position. Cena grabs a side headlock. Nitro tries to shoot him off, but Cena hangs on, taking him down with the headlock. Nitro gets back to his feet. He shoots Cena into the ropes, but gets tackled. Quick cover gets two. Cena backs him into the corner and we get a clean break. Nitro charges, but gets taken down with a drop toehold. Cena is looking for the STFU, but Nitro scurries to the ropes. Cena backs off briefly, then eats a back elbow when he tries to close in. Nitro hammers on Cena and goes for a whip. Cena reverses him into the corner. He rebounds out and Cena plants him with a Fisherman's suplex for a nearfall.

Cena sends Nitro into the ropes and scores with a sideslam, picking up another nearfall. He whips Nitro *hard* into the corner, putting him down. Another corner whip follows. Cena charges in behind him, but there's no one home. They trade punches and Cena goes for a whip. Nitro reverses. Cena is looking for a shoulderblock, but Nitro ducks it and Cena hits hard, rolling to the floor. Nitro whips him into the steps, then rolls him in for the cover. Cena is out at two. Nitro punches away from the mount, but is still only able to get two.

Nitro pounds on Cena for a bit and dumps him with a back suplex. Cover gets two. He whips Cena into the corner, but charges into a back elbow. Cena tries to mount a comeback, but Nitro levels him with a clothesline. He goes for a whip, but Cena reverses him into the corner, bulldogging him on the rebound. He charges Nitro, who yanks down the top rope. Cena ends up spilling to the floor as we go to commercials.

-Commercials

When we return, Cena is seated up top. He blocks a superplex and shoves Nitro to the mat. Nitro pops back up, though, nailing Cena with a dropkick that sends him tumbling all the way to the floor! He rolls Cena in, but it's still only a two count. Nitro is getting frustrated. He starts laying in punches, but that's only firing Cena up. He comes back punching and plants Nitro with his Blue Thunder bomb. Five Knuckle Shuffle! He lifts Nitro for the FU, but he lands on his feet.

Nitro springboards off the ropes, connecting with his spinning kick to the face. He covers, but Cena won't stay down! He follows up with an atomic drop lift, dropped straight down into a facebuster, but Cena again escapes at two. Nitro locks him in a sleeper, climbing onto his back for extra leverage. Cena starts to wilt, but fights his way up. He lifts Nitro and rams backwards into the corner. Throwback neckbreaker by Cena He heads up top, hitting a Fame Asser! STFU is locked and Nitro quickly taps out.

Good match. Cena gets crapped on way, way too much. I prefer him in ring to just about anyone these days. What he does is simple for the most part, but it makes sense and he's as good with the "whens & whys" in his offense as anyone on the WWE roster right now. Rarely do you see a bad Cena match. I can see that people think the underdog booking has grown stale but from bell to bell there's no issue to gripe about at all…

-Later tonight, CM Punk faces Elijah Burke. Two out of three falls to determine a #1 Contender for the ECW title. Should be a blast!

-Commercials

-Roddy Piper (!) of all people is coming out. Always great to see the Hot Rod. I recently watched the documentary portion of his DVD and it's great, by the way. At any rate, he's running down his definition of "hardcore," when Matt Striker's music cuts him off. He comes out. With a birthday cake. You know what that means. He asks Piper to sing Happy Birthday to him. Piper obliges, but shoves the cake into his face. He leaves. Boogeyman pops out from under the ring. Striker bails, but Piper tosses him back in. Tree Slam. Worm bath. Ick.

-Main event is next.

-Commercials

-Video package for The Miz.

-Clips from Vengeance show Nitro winning the ECW title. We cut to a promo, where he informs us that he has a severe cold and is running a fever. John Cena just caught him on a bad day. He'll be watching Punk/Burke, but could care less who wins, because they're not getting the belt from him.

-Burke gets his intro.

-Commercials

Elijah Burke v. CM Punk - 2/3 Falls -

Primera Caida

Punk grabs a side headlock. Burke shoots him into the ropes, but gets tackled. Punk covers him immediately, but doesn't even get one. Tazz runs down the psychology of a 2/3 Falls match and points out that Punk was trying to catch Burke sleeping. No dice, though. Punk takes Burke down and cranks on his leg. He pulls Burke up and switches back to the side headlock. Burke tries to lift him for a shinbreaker, but Punk applies pressure and stops that in it's tracks. Burke backs him into the ropes and punches him in the gut. He goes for a whip, but Punk reverses, taking him over with a pair of hiptosses and a side headlock takedown. Burke rises to his feet and scores with some sort of Judo throw and we have a face off!

They start trading strikes and Punk takes Burke down with a snapmare. He adds a spine kick just to be a dick. Slam by Punk. Snap legdrop scores, but the cover only gets two. He moves in, but Burke uses his momentum against him, flinging him into the corner. He pounds on Punk and gets a nearfall. Front facelock by Burke. Punk lifts him up and drives him into the corner. Punches in the corner, but Burke counters with Snake Eyes. He goes for the Elijah Express, but Punk cuts him off with a leg lariat for two. He heads up top, but Burke crotches him. Punk is hung up in the ropes. This time, the Elijah Express connects and Burke goes up one fall to none.

Segunda Caida

The referee makes Burke back off so Punk can at least get to his feet. Burke says screw that and quickly covers him. Punk escapes at two. Burke pounds on him for a bit, but Punk continues to kick out at two. Punk gets to his feet. He charges Burke, who yanks the top rope down. Punk flies to the floor and lands hard. Burke looks to be content with a countout. Punk reaches the apron at eight. Burke tries to suplex him back in. Punk slips away, rolling Burke up and knotting this one at one fall apiece.

-Commercials

Tercera Caida

When we return from the break, Burke has Punk locked in a surfboard submission. Punk fights to his feet and flips forward, nailing Burke with a dropkick. Burke stumbles into the corner. Punk follows him in with a clothesline and goes for a whip. Burke reverses him into the opposite corner. Punk lifts his boots to block a charge, but Burke catches them. He flings them to the side and yanks Punk straight down on the back of his head. He goes for his handstand elbow out of the corner, but Punk moves. He rolls Burke up with a small package, but only for two.

Burke pops up and absolutely floors him with an uppercut, picking up a nearfall of his own. Punk is seated on the mat. Burke bounces off the ropes and connects with a Castagnoli-esque diving European uppercut to the back. He goes for a second, but Punk pops up and clotheslines him. He lays in a series of kicks, backing Burke into the ropes. Punk charges, but Burke gets his boots up, flipping backwards onto the apron in the process. He goes up top, but ends up diving into a spin kick.

Punk whips him into the corner and hits his knee strike/bulldog combo. Cover gets two. He goes for another whip, but Burke shortarms him and buries a knee to the gut. There's a few awkward seconds as Burke tries to toss Punk out, but he keeps going into the corner. Burke eventually sits him up top. Punk fights back, spiking him with a Tornado DDT for a nearfall. He lifts Burke for the GTS, but he elbows free and follows up with a gorgeous STO for two.

Burke gets cocky, slapping Punk around on the mat. It fires him up and he comes back with the KENTA Rush. Burke manages to duck the spinning backfist. He bounces off the ropes and goes for a sunset flip. They run through a Malenko/Guerrero rollup sequence, ending up on their feet, fighting for a backslide. Punk blocks it, hoists him up and connects with a GO TO SLEEP. He covers and Punk is your new number one contender.

Postmatch, Punk looks skyward and mouths something, but the cameras cut away pretty quickly. Johnny Nitro appears in the aisle and gives Punk a hand. They stare one another down as we fade out…

How Do You Stand When You've Been Crushed?

2007-06-26T16:37:00.000-05:00

And I can't stop staring back

How did I get this way?

Take a big look at a living lie...

It was the finest neighborhood in the small town, and the house everyone went by every day was as beautiful as it ever was.

At least it was then.

In a few hours helicopters would surround it from the sky and newscameras would surround it on the ground, but that was the future nobody saw coming. Since everyone just went by the house on the way to their usual jaunts they had no idea the wife was strangled, the son suffocated, and as their corpses' odors began wafting through the air that usually hummed with conditioning that the great man who wasn't that great at all had prepared the final seconds of his life.

Chris Benoit stepped off the chair and into the underworld.

Thank God.

Sometimes I dream about it

What it's like back home

The railroad tracks and the pussy willow

Every time something like this happens, the cliche angel gets its wings. But out of all the It Wasn't Supposed To End Like Thises there've been and will be, this is headlining the It Wasn't Supposed To End Like Thises.

He came from a small town singularly focused on a mission. He had had an idol who he saw as a great man. The great man in reality was horribly flawed. The great man would give his soul for the lights and end up crippled and raving.

The important thing was the young fan never saw the great man for anything less than the great man he was for 20 or 30 minutes a night.

And as he sat mesmerized in his seat, an idea formed. To prove himself to the great man. To be like the great man.

...maybe even better?

And I had to leave it

But I go back

Whenever my tired head hits the pillow

This is Tokyo. This is Mexico City. This is Moose Jaw at 20 below. This is Tijuana. This is Kyoto. This is your legacy, and it's starting one city at a time.

The singular vision, the focused intensity, to all at once be the great man and surpass the great man.

The singular vision that would spawn a generation of everybody else like him, who wasn't 6'6" and 300, who just wanted to do it like all the great men the'd seen do it before them.

Maybe there were only 12 people.

Inconsequential.

Did the great men before them ever care about such pittiances?

They did.

He just didn't know it.

This is another prefecture.

This is another small Mexican town where you take your applause and hold it for days. Applause translates very well.

And soon, one day, you'll be able to come to the promised land.

Rags to rags and rust to rust

How do you stand when you've been crushed?

He thought he'd killed him. It wasn't even his fault, and he thought he'd killed him. The guilt nearly drove him away. The previous 5 years--7?so hard to tell anymore--would've disappeared under his feet. He would've come out of it marred for life.

But in the end, he would've had to have face himself as something less than a great man.

And once that turned out all right, he continued to become a great man.

?uestlove of the Roots so eloquently stated an artist's biggest Catch-22 once in an interview with Toure. Everybody who is merely loved wants to be respected. Everybody who is merely respected wants to be loved. And he already had their respect. He didn't have that many checks that cleared, though. He didn't have that good a relationship with whichever Mountie Came Lately worked the border.

And a broken relationship, and kids...

His name dried on the ink and he was gone.

So rags to riches was a bust

Nobody ever asks a glue person how they do it, and the reason they don't ask is because the glue person is the glue person, and if you ask the centipede how it walks pretty soon it goes nowhere. And in some cases the glue person knows where everything is, and in some cases the glue person has fostered all the relationships with the big money clients, and in some cases the glue person went out for 12 minutes, was awesome, and promptly forgotten.

Another thing that makes the glue people the glue people is they may disagree 100% with what you want done. You will never, ever find this out about glue people until after the job is done, in which with their head down and a genial mumble they will voice their complaints.

He was now a glue person, but soon his time would come.

And even though he didn't really want to work with her, it was just work.

What was the worst thing that could possibly happen?

Busted once again

But I'll show them one day

That I can buy and sell the world

Glue is a perfect thing when it works. When it comes undone, it greatly resembles a porn theatre's floor at 1 a.m.

And the glue person was coming apart.

Him and everyone like him--all the glue people--were finding out what good glue people were in a major corporation. The major corporation was the Matrix, and the glue people were the batteries. Day after day, week after week, another wave of bullshit, another slight stain on the great man, another fucking tsunami of bullshit, and as the non-glue people undid the company he could see nothing but a sea of brown coming up to his eyes, drowning him to his death.

This never happened to the great man.

And in the immortal words of Joseph Strummer, what are we gonna do now?

And one day I'll come through with my American dream

But it won't mean a fucking thing

It didn't matter in that time that there'd been a little bullshit along the way here, too. In the great place on the great date next to his best friend, with his family surrounding him in the great ring, the great man ascended to full-fledged legendary status. The call of the great man's accomplishment on the evening would become legendary as well, as well as it should've been.

He'd seen a hero. He'd tried to become the hero.

He'd outshined the hero.

He'd become a hero.

In the hallways he was the North Star. In countless forums, he was the topic of discussion and everyone talked about him. On countless tape players and DVD machines, young men saw a great man and committed his every step to memory, in order to one day--with luck--become the great man themselves.

Rags to rags and rust to rust

He was at once the figurehead and the puppet. While he was the man, he wasn't, and everyone who knew enough about such things knew it.

And since he was a glue guy, he'd never complain about putting the new kids over. For a major corporation that was always the best thing about having a glue guy in a high (but not TOO high, hee hee hee) position for you. The glue guy took the biggest achievements and the smallest moments and no matter when you turned around and/or for what, there he was, plugging away.

They shook his hand and they talked his ear off and they wept at the way he made them more than what they really were and as he discussed with them his little grin came out.

And then they would walk down the hallway.

The great man was virtually alone.

How do you stand when you've been crushed?

It was the oddest thing but sometimes he could FEEL the confetti. FEEL it. In that hour alongside his best friend of years as they both exulted all they'd overcome they were immortal.

And then one day, he was dead.

How do you go to dinner with someone and find out at breakfast they're gone? What do you do with your best friends gone? When you are the survivor--

--should you be?

Rags to rags and rust to rust

Don't let me go

He tried to get away from it all. Couldn't. The great man had been forced to get away, but he just couldn't quite bring himself to do it.

He couldn't quite bring himself to do that?

And the applause echoed dimly, and the platitudes went in one ear and out the other

Don't let me go

And every day he got up and his best friend was still fucking dead, but didn't that happen to everybody no matter what they did?

Don't let me go

Who knew him? Who really knew him that was still around? Who'd ever even been inside the house, thick with regalia of trophies past and accomplishments to make the great man the great man at least superficially, where it mattered most? Who knew?

Because we all should've.

Don't let me go

The hiatuses we explained away as his need to unwind after a stressfilled year. The stories we heard of him pushing his body to unconscionable limits and seeing him unleash on the new punk kids tickled our hearts, and we all smiled and chuckled it away as the great man teaching the new punk kids what it would take to be a great man like he was. The intensity we wrote off as something he just brought to the ring. There was every evidence in the world something beyond the normal was fueling this man for what we could see of him, that there was a whole life he wasn't talking about we let him not talk about in this day and age because he was one of the good guys, that something some indefinable thing that we couldn't quite put our finger on was slightly off, and maybe said indefinable thing was what we loved about him the most.

And then last weekend the great man went back to the finest neighborhood in the small town and the house was as beautiful as it'd ever been.

It would be a fine place to end it all.

Don't let me go...

2007-06-25T22:53:00.001-05:00

I really don't know what the fuck to say anymore.

I'm watching CM Punk crying his eyes out about a guy who was "his hero."

He shouldn't be doing that now.

Neither of these guys in the picture should be dead right now.

I and many other fans shouldn't feel like this whole wrestling thing is just a big waste of time now, that it really doesn't matter anymore.

I really don't know what the fuck to do right now. I really don't.

God bless you Chris Benoit. I hope you find some sort of peace in the next world.

********************
Pro wrestler, family found dead in Fayetteville home

By Saeed Ahmed, Kathy Jefcoats
The Atlanta-Journal Constitution
Published on: 06/25/07

In its ongoing attempt to constantly outdo itself, the World Wrestling Entertainment recently staged the "death" of its chairman in an apparent limo explosion.

Monday night, the largest wrestling organization in the world grappled with a real-life murder mystery: What led to the apparent murder-suicide of superstar wrestler Chris Benoit, his wife and child inside their expansive Fayetteville home?
Chris Benoit

Officials have not disclosed how the family died, other than to say the deaths did not involve a gun.

"The details, when they come out," said Fayette County District Attorney Scott Ballard, "are going to prove a little bizarre."

Deputies checking on the family at the behest of Benoit's employer discovered the bodies of the 40-year-old wrestler, his wife, Nancy Benoit, 43, and their 7-year-old son, Daniel, on Monday afternoon at their home on Green Meadow Lane.

Benoit, a Canada native, maintained a residence in metro Atlanta from the time he wrestled for the now-defunct Ted Turner-owned World Championship Wrestling organization.

Most recently, Benoit performed as part of World Wrestling Entertainment. He was scheduled to appear in a pay-per-view title match Sunday night, but was a no-show because of a "family emergency," the WWE said during the broadcast.

His employers, apparently worried, asked deputies to check in on the family â€” leading to the discovery, said Sheriff's Lt. Tommy Pope.

Murders are rare in Fayette County, particularly so in areas like Green Meadow Lane, a rural stretch of the county where multi-acre mansion-style homes dot the landscape. In 2006, the sheriff's office didn't investigate a single murder.

Fans tried to cope with the news Monday evening as the blogosphere erupted in reader disbelief.

"Obviously, all sorts of speculation are running rampant but I have talked to so many people and nobody really knows," said Bryan Alvarez, who runs Figurefour Weekly, a wrestling newsletter and Web site, from Linwood, Wash.

Benoit began his career in Calgary more than 20 years ago. He wrestled in Japan before moving back to North America.

While working in Atlanta with WCW, he met his wife, Nancy, who managed several wrestlers and went by the stage name, "Woman."

At the time, her then-husband drew up a script that had the couple involved in a relationship as part of an ongoing storyline.

Soon after, the two became romantically involved in real life and married. Benoit has two other children from a prior relationship.

He joined WWE in 2000, and four years later, won its world heavyweight championship.

The family had moved into the Fayetteville neighborhood last summer, said neighbor Alaina Jones.

None of the neighbors recalled seeing police at the house before. Monday night, about half a dozen cars idled on the circular driveway. Deputies stood guard outside the wrought-iron gates of the residence. A car full of youngsters who stopped to gawk at the scene were pulled out by deputies, frisked and sent on their way.

The Monday night broadcast of WWE's "Raw" on the USA Network was supposed to have been a who-dunit into the "death" of Chairman Vince McMahon, whose limousine burst into a fiery explosion moments after he stepped into it after a bout in Wilkes-Barre, Pa., two weeks ago.

The organization scrapped the storyline following Benoit's death, and instead televised a three-hour retrospective on Benoit's career.

And unlike the two-page, hyperbole-filled news release it sent out after its chairman's "death," the statement announcing Benoit's real-life passing was curt and matter-of-fact:

"Chris Benoit and his family were found dead in their home. There are no further details at this time."

R.I.P. Chris Benoit, 1967 - 2007

2007-06-25T19:11:00.001-05:00

I don't even know what the heck to say any more when this happens. I'm sure the rest of the Heart Punch family will have more to add later. . .so I'll just leave it with the words from WWE.com.

R.I.P., Chris.
------------
World Wrestling Entertainment was informed today by authorities in Fayetteville County, Ga., that WWE Superstar Chris Benoit, his wife, Nancy, and his son were found dead in their home. Authorities are investigating, but no other details are available at this time.

Instead of its announced programming for tonight on USA Network, WWE will air a three-hour tribute to Chris Benoit.

Chris was beloved among his fellow Superstars, and was a favorite among WWE fans for his unbelievable athleticism and wrestling ability. He always took great pride in his performance, and always showed respect for the business he loved, for his peers and towards his fans. This is a terrible tragedy and an unbearable loss.

WWE extends its sincere condolences and prayers to the Benoit family and loved ones in this time of tragedy.

Friday Night SmackDown! 6/22 (23)/2007: For and Against

2007-06-24T04:45:00.000-05:00

FOR: Torrie's wondering what's up with that introduction, too.

AGAINST: That's some pretty flimsy evidence, Edge.

AGAINST: The hell does MVP have to do with this?

FOR: Here's Flair to be the voice of reason.

FOR: That works too.

FOR: JBL on somebody else having his number: "I don't think that's ever happened in my career."

AGAINST: Funaki's already in the ring? This can't be good.

AGAINST: Nope.

AGAINST: That's not gonna get it done.

AGAINST: Way to telegraph it, Teddy.

AGAINST: A 'fact-finding' mission?

FOR: JBL: "There's 13 people there. What'd he have to find out?"

AGAINST: No, Cole, Teddy's announcement has NOTHING to do with the investigation.

FOR: This sort of half-cloverleaf Finlay's got Matt in.

FOR: GREAT ending.

AGAINST: I'm not sure how to gauge that crowd reaction.

AGAINST: Wait, what?

AGAINST: Masters? Talk about going from bad to worse.

FOR: The Master Lock montage.

AGAINST: Swerve?!?

FOR: One other "well-known" personality?

AGAINST: "Taking aggression out on balls?" What?

FOR: Flair's "Woooo!" RIGHT AFTER the McCool video. Expert.

AGAINST: JBL: "One thing you hate to do is wrestle a guy in his hometown." I don't think anyone (except Trish in her farewell match) has won in their hometown in five years.

FOR: Edge slowing up after Batista gets the hot tag in.

FOR: Orton, Batista, MVP, Marella, Yang, Cade & Murdoch, Melina, Punk, Deuce & Domino.

ECW on Sci-Fi (6.19.07)

2007-06-23T19:38:00.000-05:00

-Opening montage. With no champion to focus on, CM Punk gets the coveted final shot.

-Later tonight, Punk squares off with Marcus Cor Van and Chris Benoit faces Elijah Burke. The winners advance to Vengeance: Night of Champions, where the ECW Title will be up for grabs.

-Vince stuff. I'll be typing that a bunch in the coming weeks (months) as it's little more than a fast forward point for me, so get used to it!

Chris Benoit v. Elijah Burke -

This is going to rock. Seriously, why is Burke not getting the love he deserves. He's churning out some consistently awesome TV matches and working smart while he does it. Thank heavens they dropped Terkay, so the star of the team was given a chance to shine. And, uh…yeah. I think Chris Benoit has shown himself to be pretty nifty in the past as well!

Benoit opens the match with a rear waistlock takedown. They trade reversals on the mat for a bit and Benoit ends up shoving him into the corner. He moves in, but eats a back elbow. Double leg by Burke, who makes the cover. Benoit is out at one. He slaps Burke upside the head and chops him. Burke ducks a second and rolls him up for another quick nearfall. Benoit tries to snap on the Crossface, but Burke scurries to the ropes. He kicks Benoit in the gut, but takes a nasty chop in return. He manages to corner Benoit and starts punching away at him.

He whips Benoit chestfirst into the opposite corner (and hard!) and covers him for two. He stomps away at Benoit's ribs and locks him in a seated abdominal stretch. Benoit tries to fight up, so Burke switches to a front facelock. Bad move, as Benoit counters with a Northern Lights suplex for two. Burke pops up and kicks him in the back of the head. He lifts Benoit for a vertical suplex, but drops him gutfirst across the top rope. Burke then knocks Benoit off of the apron and to the floor. He rolls him in and covers for two.

Burke chokes him in the ropes. He bounces off the ropes, looking for a splash, but there's no one home. Benoit sends him into the ropes and tries to kill him with a back elbow. He takes Burke over with a snap suplex and floats into a cover, getting two. He follows with another Northern Lights suplex, but Burke escapes at two. Rolling Germans by Benoit! He heads up top for the diving headbutt, but Burke gets his knees up and Benoit goes facefirst into them. Holy crap!

Burke plants Benoit with an STO and makes the cover. Despite the fact that he just knocked his own face off, Benoit kicks out at two! Burke lifts him for a suplex, but Benoit escapes after a few well placed knee strikes. He goes for another German, but Burke blocks it. Benoit ducks the ensuing back elbow and takes him down. He's looking for the Sharpshooter, but Burke kicks him away. He lines up for the Elijah Express, but Benoit moves. He locks Burke in the Sharpshooter and we have ourselves a tapout! Benoit advances to Vengeance!

Good match. I wish they'd gotten a bit more time, but that's one of the limitations of televised wrestling. As long as they get to work a bunch more times, I know that I'll be a happy camper, at least.

-Up next…Vince stuff.

-Commercials

-It is indeed Vince stuff. They weren't lying! Steph has gotten cute again. The blonde look wasn't working for her at all.

Boogeyman v. Sean Alexander -

Lockup. Tree Slam. Worm bath. Fin. Well, if they do *this* every week, I won't even mind having him on this show. Let's get to something I care about. Or, WWE's Murder She Wrote.

-Commercials

-Have we talked about Vince McMahon dying yet? Because he totally did!

Tommy Dreamer v. Kevin Thorn -

I'm glad that Thorn didn't get shipped to another show. I'm probably the only person who cares, though. I usually am! Anyway, Thorn nails Dreamer with a back elbow in the corner. He follows up with a slam, then tackles him. Dreamer trips him up and looks like he's going for a Bow & Arrow submission, but Thorn is in the ropes. Dreamer tries to whip him into the ropes, but Thorn shortarms it and plants him with a spinebuster. He stomps on Dreamer and drops an elbow. Whip and Thorn ducks his head. Dreamer is looking for a sunset flip, but Thorn blocks it and stomps him again. This time, though, the elbow misses.

Dreamer crawls into the corner. Thorn charges, but Dreamer takes him down with a drop toehold, sending him crashing into the corner. He follows with a seated dropkick and a bulldog. He hooks Thorn for the DDT, but Thorn counters free and lines up for a clothesline. Dreamer ducks it and scores with a Rydeen Bomb! Cover gets two. Dreamer's ankle looks a bit gimpy. He punches away at Thorn in the corner. Thorn shoves him down hard. Dreamer continues to clutch at the ankle. Thorn quickly covers him and gets the win. I guess he might actually be injured. Hard to tell with Dreamer, what with him working with a BROKEN BACK in the past…

-Up next? Well…you know.

-Commercials

-Theme for Vengeance is "Gone" by Fuel. They're actually a local band that played around here all the time before they got big. Why anyone would care about such a useless factoid I'm not sure!

-Oh, Vince is still dead, if you cared.

Johnny Nitro v. Nunzio -

Fireman's carry takedown by Nunzio into a rear waistlock. Nitro tries to escapes, but Nunzio rides it out. Nitro finally makes it to his feet. He charges, but Nunzio takes him down with a gorgeous side headlock. Great throw there. Nitro fights to his feet and shoves Nunzio chestfirst into the corner. He catches him with a springboard kick to the face on the rebound. Cover gets two. He hits his Capoeira legdrop for another nearfall. Cravate by Nitro. He knees Nunzio in the gut and goes for a Hangman's neckbreaker. Nunzio spins free, elbows him in the back and levels him with a flying clothesline. He takes Nitro over with a satellite headscissors.

Corner charge by Nunzio. Nitro catches him and sits him up top. Nunzio shoves him away and connects with a missile dropkick. Cover gets two. He locks Nitro in a surfboard, but Nitro flips forward and catches him with a dropkick. He plants Nunzio with a backbreaker, then immediately pulls him into a Hangman's neckbreaker. Cover gets two. He follows up with some sort of spinning neckbreaker and picks up the win.

This was a fun match. Nunzio did a bit more than I thought he'd get to. Nitro is super athletic and I think he'll be good on this roster. I just hope he grows as a worker at the rate Punk/Burke/Cor Van have seemed to.

-Speaking of Cor Van, he's backstage with Burke, telling him that he's going to go through both Punk and Benoit to become the ECW Champ. Burke doesn't look pleased.

-Commercials

-Video package for Miz. Afterwards, we see K² and crew backstage. The one whose name I don't know (not the diva search chick…the other one) is ready to fuck him right then and there. She walks off and we find out that K² already seems to have done so. WHEN EXTREME EXPOSE EXPLODES!

-Marcus Cor Van intro.

-Commercials

Marcus Cor Van v. CM Punk -

Punk ducks a clothesline at the bell and fires away at Cor Van with a series of forearms. He sends him into the corner, but Cor Van rebounds out with a clothesline He pounds on Punk and rams him into the corner. Whip to the opposite corner, but Punk leaps to the second ropes and comes back with a crossbody for two. He takes Cor Van over with a pair of armdrags and grabs a hammerlock. Cor Van punches away at Punk's ribs to escape. Punk ducks another clothesline and takes Cor Van down with a fireman's carry for a quick nearfall.

He lays in a series of kicks and goes for a backslide, but Cor Van will have none of that. He counters into an armbar takedown. He pounds away at the arm and posts Punk in the corner. Cor Van rolls out and wraps Punk's arm around the post. Back in, they trade strikes. Cor Van takes control, grabbing a hammerlocks and taking Punk down with a drop toehold. Who knew Monty could wrestle? He drives a knee into the injured shoulder and covers him for two. He goes back to cranking on the arm, but Punk rolls him up and gets a nearfall of his own.

Cor Van pops up immediately and levels Punk with a clothesline. Back to the hammerlock. Punk fights to his feet. He flips up and over Cor Van, then bounces off the ropes. He's looking for a crossbody, but Cor Van catches him and turns it into a fallaway slam. Cover gets two. Armbar by Cor Van. Punk tries to escape, but takes a knee to the gut for his troubles. Cor Van whips him into the corner, but charges into a back elbow. A second charge goes no better, as Punk gets a boot up. He comes off the second rope and drops Cor Van with a clothesline.

Punk sends him into the ropes and connects with a leg lariat. He hits the corner knee strike/bulldog combo, then climbs onto the apron. He goes for a springboard crossbody, but Cor Van catches him. He tries to turn it into a powerslam, but stumbles a bit and spikes Punk directly on the top/back of his head. HARD. He covers, but Punk escapes at two. Punk looks out of it. Butterfly suplex by Cor Van. He charges into the corner, but Punk avoids it. He quickly hoists him up and hits the GTS for the win.

It'll be Benoit versus Punk at Vengeance. YES! I'm totally geeking out about that. Not enough to order the PPV or anything, but I will pick up the DVD at some point. Speaking of Benoit, he comes out and we have ourselves a staredown! They shake hands, but on Sunday it'll be on like neckbone…

Great show this week. Everything zipped along and there was some really fun wrestling. I hate that there's so much focus on the VKM stuff, but yeah, what are you gonna do? It can't go on forever, can it? No really...can it?

Friday Night Smackdown 6/15/2007: For and Against

2007-06-18T02:59:00.000-05:00

AGAINST: The draft. Smackdown got robbed like the Great Train.

FOR: The new guys are already in in the credits.

AGAINST: Seriously, how do I even approach this?

AGAINST: Philly may have been the wrong place to do this in.

AGAINST: I'm gonna miss those kids. Good luck on the big show.

AGAINST: They're even doing the testimonials?

FOR: At least Teddy's was pretty good.

FOR: JBL emphasizing getting Torrie Wilson (as, frankly, he should)

AGAINST: That was an odd escape by Matt there.

FOR: Matt wins! Good match.

FOR: MVP continually ducking out of the ring to slow down Batista, and Cole and JBL explaining it as such.

AGAINST: The "Rizza"? Who pronounces that phonetically?

FOR: The build to the boot Batista over the security wall spot.

AGAINST: MVP > Chono? Dubious.

FOR: Cole: "Can you imagine what it might be like getting hit by a cannonball?" JBL: "I can imagine what it's like getting hit by Batista."

AGAINST: Isn't Daivari from Minneapolis?

AGAINST: JBL on Noble: "The sun sets between his house and hell." What?

FOR: Cole: "You're not really a redneck anymore."

FOR: The superplex/powerbomb combo.

FOR: LOL at "adult barley and hops", "fermented grape juice" and Vince throwing peanuts at Cole on the corporate jet.

AGAINST: A SWIMMING reference?

FOR: This match.

FOR: That Ladder Matches DVD. Seriously.

FOR: Cole pointing out that Edge dropped his hurt leg on Flair.

AGAINST: How is it a DQ if Flair hit MVP first?

AGAINST: And it gets worse in the supplemental draft. London, Kendrick, and Regal gone. Why is Daivari not being used as Khali's mouthpiece? And let's not even get into the idiocy of Sandman on Raw. Rey, Taker ... hurry back, please.

FOR: Eugene might be helped with a fresh start, and the Major Brothers fill a hole, if nothing else.

ECW on Sci-Fi (6.12.07)

2007-06-13T13:26:00.000-05:00

-We open with a shot of WWE Headquarters. The WWE flag flies at half mast. Amazingly enough, they had the restraint to not fly the US Flag at half mast as well. I'm literally shocked by that. Anyway, if you missed Raw…Vince McMahon? Dead. As a doorknob. A burnt up, crispy doorknob!

-Let's see how that entire Vince McMahon being dead thing came about! They replay the entire segment, which of course means we got to see Paul London's inappropriately giant grin again. I think he's hiding something! Get Leslie Nielson on the case! Where's Angela Lansbury when you need her? And that gigantic guy that was standing behind Charlie Haas is apparently Dan Rodimer, for whatever that's worth. At any rate, VINCE GO BOOM!

-The announcers are sad. No one else is, though. They tell us that tonight's matches are dedicated to Vince.

-10 bell salute. Moment of silence? Not so much. The crowd booed each time the bell was rung. The announcers were both shocked and appalled by this.

-Commercials. No opening montage? This IS serious!

Tommy Dreamer v. Balls Mahoney - Extreme Rules -

Yeah, this is exactly the match I'd want to dedicate to Vince. They open with the indy reversal sequence, just to show that anyone can do it. Maybe this will cause people to stop doing it. Played out, yo. Played out. Drop toehold by Dreamer, who floats into a side headlock. Balls shoots him into the ropes and goes for a hiptoss. Dreamer blocks and lines up for a clothesline. Balls ducks it and comes back punching. He plants Dreamer with a back suplex. Dreamer backs into the ropes. Balls charges, but Tommy drops down and Balls sails over the top. Baseball slide dropkick from Dreamer sends him into the announce table.

Dreamer nails him with, you got it, a kitchen sink. He goes for a whip, but Balls reverses him into the steps. Balls tosses some plunder into the ring. He nails Dreamer a few times with a trashcan lid and gets two. He goes for a charge into the corner, but Dreamer moves and Balls goes facefirst into the lid. Dreamer blasts him with a trashcan, then rolls out to grab a chair. He opens it up and places it *upside down* in the ring. He tries to suplex Balls onto it, but he counters out and sends Dreamer into the ropes. Drop toehold onto the chair!

Balls heads up top. Dreamer ends up crotching him, though. He ties Balls to the Tree of Woe and nails him with a trashcan. He puts it in front of his face and hits his running dropkick in the corner. He rolls to the floor, looking for more plunder. More specifically, a table. He sets it up (kinda) near the corner, but Balls cuts him off with a trashcan shot. He puts Dreamer on the table and comes off the second ropes with a legdrop. No one home! Dreamer plants him with a DDT onto a chair and gets the win!

Neither guy seems to care about the Vince McMahon thing one bit. Way to sell the angle!

-Later, Chris friggin' Benoit makes his debut, teaming with CM Punk versus Elijah Burke and Marcus Cor Van. Chris Benoit! Also, Boogeyman makes his debut next. One of those things is ridiculously awesome. I'll let you decide which one.

-Commercials

Matt Striker (already in the ring) v. Boogeyman -

Instead of "Typical Snitsky squash," substitute "Typical Boogeyman squash" and you have this match. He pounds Striker down and quickly finishes him off with the Tree Slam. Postmatch, he eats some worms and lets them dribble into Striker's mouth. Yeah, I sure loved that draft. The supplemental draft better bring the goods, or I'll be a sad panda.

-Commercials

-Footage from after Raw went off the air. We watch the limo burn up for a few seconds and then the firemen arrive. All two of them. I'm unimpressed. The announcers? Care about all of this! Me? Not so much!

-Main event is next.

-Commercials. They continue to use Vince McMahon's DO OR DIE speech to hype the PPV. That's classy! If we're supposed to believe that he's dead, at least treat your product as if he really was gone. A little realism never hurt anyone, I promise!

Chris Benoit & CM Punk v. Elijah Burke & Marcus Cor Van -

C'mon…*someone* should at least kinda sorta pretend that the death of Vincent Kennedy McMahon has had some tiny, small, even slightly noticeable effect on them. Something. ANYTHING. An armband perhaps? Or maybe just the tiniest little frown? The angle is going to be retarded, but at least throw it a friggin' bone if you work for the company. Yikes. Why am I ranting about an angle that's going to dominate my TV instead of actual, you know, wrestling? It's a world gone mad, I say. Mad! Anyway, there's a match in here somewhere.

Punk opens the match with Cor Van. He takes him down with a side headlock. Cor Van fights up and Punk chains it into a hammerlock. It's reversed. Punk shoots Cor Van into the ropes, but gets tackled. They lockup again and Punk snaps him over with an armdrag. Cor Van comes back with a kick the gut and lays in some clubbing forearms to the back. He pulls Punk into the corner and makes the tag. Burke comes in and targets Punk's bad ribs immediately. Punk tries to come back, but Burke absolutely obliterates him with a knee to the face. Seriously, I'd buy that knee as the finish. Punk manages to kick out at two, though.

Hammerlock by Burke. Punk reverses it and takes him down in a Fireman's Carry. He makes a quick cover, but can only get two. Tag to Benoit. He punches away at Burke, sends him into the ropes and tries to run through him with a back elbow. Burke bails, but Benoit is in hot pursuit. He nails Burke and rolls him right back in. Burke begs off. Benoit stomps on him, then takes him over with a snap suplex for two. Burke manages to slow Benoit down with a shot to the gut and quickly makes the tag to Cor Van.

They close in for the lockup and Cor Van makes the preemptive strike with a kick to the gut. They trade strikes for a bit and Benoit backs him into a corner. He drives some knees into the gut, but Cor Van responds in kind. He even adds some shoulderblocks for good measure. He sends Benoit into the ropes and ducks his head. Benoit nails him and makes the tag to Punk. He comes in with a springboard forearm smash. He follows up with a spinning heel kick, then levels Cor Van with a clothesline.

He whips Cor Van into the corner and follows him in with a knee strike. Cor Van shrugs off the ensuing bulldog, though, sending Punk into the ropes. Punk still manages to catch him with a leg lariat on the rebound. Now it's Cor Van's turn to bail out. Elijah Burke tries to jump Punk from behind, but Benoit charges in and destroys him with another back elbow. Benoit is feeling surly tonight. Because he's all broken up about Vince, I bet! The faces stand tall as we go to break.

-Commercials

Punk is trapped in a rear chinlock when we return. The "during the break" box is in mourning, apparently, so we won't see how the tide turned. At any rate, Punk fights up and counters with a jawbreaker. He starts toward his corner, but Burke pulls him away and drops an elbow to his back. He slams Punk, then adds a Benoit-esque power elbow. He's just begging to get his ass kicked. Cor Van tags in. He pounds Punk down for a bit and tags Burke back in.

Punk comes back punching and takes Burke down with a clothesline. He can't reach his corner, though. Burke gets a rear mount and lays in a series of crossfaces. He covers, but Punk escapes at two. Burke pulls him into the heel corner and makes the tag. Cor Van goes for a whip, but gets reversed into the corner. Punk leaps in and goes for the punches in the corner, but Cor Van flicks him to the mat. Catapult into the corner by Cor Van.

He hooks Punk for an Exploder, but gets rolled up for a quick nearfall. Punk's attempts at a tag are stuffed by Cor Van once again. He then makes one of his own. Burke whips Punk into Cor Van, who dumps him with a powerslam in the corner. He apparently doesn't make it out of the ring quickly enough for the ref, though, as he calls for the DQ. Wow. Everyone is in to brawl. Burke picked the wrong night to piss Benoit off. Rolling Germans! Diving Headbutt! Sharpshooter! Burke taps out, but no one cares, what with the match already being over and all.

-We close with VINCE GO BOOM.

Interesting (?) show this week. Some decent-ish wrestling to be sure, but now it's me that feels the dark cloud of Murder She Wrote starring Vince McMahon's missing corpse looming over me. I really don't want to put up with this shit for the next year. Probably on all three shows. Does anyone know where Rikishi was during all of this? He did it for the Rock. HE DID IT FOR THE PEOPLE!

ECW on Sci-Fi (6.5.07)

2007-06-13T10:55:00.000-05:00

-One Night Stand footage shows Bobby Lashley regaining the ECW title. Yawn.

-Opening montage.

-Vince McMahon is sitting on a stage. By himself. In a rocking chair. This probably won't end well. Lashley is headed to the ring! Vince doesn't even acknowledge his presence.

Bobby Lashley v. Balls Mahoney, Tommy Dreamer & Sandman - Hardcore Handicap match -

The Originals grab plunder before rolling in. They whale on Lashley and he bails. He comes in and the mugging continues. Lashley again gets the hell outta Dodge. He suplexes Dreamer, but Sandman cuts him off with cane shots. He and Dreamer suplex Lashley in the floor. Dreamer goes for a whip, but gets reversed into the steps. Balls jumps Lashley and rolls him in. He and Sandman lift Lashley and dump him gutfirst across the top rope. Balls hold on to him as Sandman heads up top, hitting a legdrop. Cover gets two. Vince looks on, his expression unchanged.

Lashley is tied to the Tree of Woe. Balls holds a chair in his face and Dreamer connects with his running dropkick. Sandman slides a table in. As he props it up in the corner, Dreamer holds Lashley. Balls goes for a chairshot, but Lashley moves and he blasts Dreamer with it by mistake. Balls quickly nails Lashley with the chair. He climbs to the second rope, but misses a legdrop, landing on the chair. Lashley picks up Sandman and spears him into the table. Spear to Balls! That's a wrap!

Postmatch, Lashley climbs onto the stage. He gets in Vince's face and taunts him. Vince doesn't seem to notice.

-Commercials

Kevin Thorn v. Stevie Richards -

Stevie! Poor, poor Stevie. Thorn shoves him into the corner and pounds on him. Stevie ducks a clothesline and fires back with forearms. He uses Thorn's momentum to toss him out. Stevie dives off the apron, but Thorn catches him and drops him throatfirst across the barricade. Thorn rolls him in. Shortarm clothesline gets two. He whips Stevie into the corner. He goes for the floatover, but Thorn catches him, this time dropping him throatfirst across the top rope.

He spears Stevie into the corner. Stevie avoids a kick and Thorn's leg gets caught up in the ropes. Steviekick connects! He follows with a clothesline and a pair of back elbows. Drop toehold sends Thorn into the ropes. Stevie connects with a dropkick to the back and gets two. He goes for a whip, but Thorn shortarms him into a Tree Slam. He goes for Original Sin, but Stevie slips away, snapping his throat across the top rope. He heads up top, but Thorn crotches him. Original Sin. He covers and gets the win.

-Later, the Major Brothers face the New Breed combo of Elijah Burke and Marcus Cor Van.

-Commercials

-Extreme Expose time. "Ay Chico" by Pitbull is this week's song.

-Clips of RKO KO'ing RVD @ ONS. If you understood that sentence, you probably watch too much wrestling. Go outside!

-New Breed intro.

-Commercials

New Breed (Burke & Cor Van) v. Major Brothers -

Cor Van attacks both guys at the bell, finally singling out Brian and pounding on him in the corner. Brian fires back with chops and tags Brett. He comes in off the second rope, dropping a double axehandle across Cor Van's arm. He works the arm briefly and tags Brian, who also comes in with the double axe. Cor Van clocks him with a back elbow and tags Burke. He misses an elbowdrop and Brian grabs an armbar. Or…possibly not, as Tazz is now calling the dude in the ring Brett. There was no tag! Well, now there was. But Styles is agreeing with him, saying that Brian tagged in. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt, I guess.

Anyway, the Major Bros hit a double hiptoss and pick up a nearfall. Burke comes back, leveling Brian with a big tackle. He catches Major going for a leapfrog and plants him with a flapjack. Cover gets two. Cor Van tags. And now Tazz is calling the guy in the ring Brett. I was right all along! VINDICATION! Cor Van slams Brett and knocks Brian off of the apron. He whips Brett into the heel corner and drops him with a clothesline on the rebound. Burke tags in.

He whips Brett into Cor Van, who plants him with a powerslam in the corner. That leads to Burke hitting his handstand elbowdrop thing out of the corner for a nearfall. Brett tries to mount a comeback, but eats an uppercut for his troubles. Hell, it was almost a Dragon Punch. Ryu would be proud. If he weren't fictional and all, you know. Cor Van tags in. Brett again fights back, this time taking a knee to the gut. Cor Van covers for a nearfall.

He spears Brett into the heel corner and tags Burke. He locks an abdominal stretch, with Brett countering out via hiptoss. Burke drives a knee into his back, sending him into his corner, where he makes the tag. Brian comes in and cleans house. He plants Burke with a spinebuster and gets a two count. O'Connor Roll by Major, but the heels make a blind tag. Cor Van comes in and kicks Brian right in the throat. He follows with the Pounce. Brett tries to come in, but Burke leaps over the pile with a dropkick and knocks him to the floor. This one is over.

-Still to come, CM Punk versus Matt Striker!

-Commercials

-Clips from the handicap match earlier tonight.

-Punk gets his intro.

-Commercials

-Striker is out. He's going to teach Punk a lesson tonight and says that when he's through, everyone will look up to him.

CM Punk v. Matt Striker -

They trade rear waistlock reversals at the start. Striker quickly wearies of this and knees Punk in the gut. Punk reverses a whip, though, connecting with a leg lariat. He takes Striker down with a snapmare, then scores with a spine kick for two. He whips Striker into the corner and follows with a running forearm strike. He signals for a second, but Striker's superior intellect allows him to cut this off with a back elbow. He goes for a clothesline, but Punk kicks the arm away. Striker reverses him into the corner and levels him with an enzu-lariat.

Striker stomps on Punk, who responds with a series of kicks. Striker ducks a kick and plants Punk with a back suplex. He follows with a Northern Lights suplex, then goes for a half crab. Punk uses his free leg to kick free. Striker casually kicks him in the spine, then slams him. Punk comes back with a quick rollup, but he can only get two. Striker immediately pops up and drops him with a clothesline. He stumbles a bit applying a Boston Crab, so he releases it, drops an elbow to the back and goes back to the half crab.

Punk escapes. Striker goes for a whip, but Punk shortarms him, hoisting him up for the GTS. Striker hangs onto the ropes for dear life. He slips away from Punk, then spikes him with an elevated spinning neckbreaker for a nearfall. Back to the half crab, but Punk reaches the ropes. Striker tries to lock it in once again, but Punk rolls him up for another quick two.

He ducks a clothesline and connects with the KENTA Rush. Kawada kicks from Punk! He hits the running knee strike in the corner and follows with the bulldog. Cover gets two. Striker fires back. He sets up for a spinning neckbreaker, but Punk spins through. He lifts Striker up and tells him to GO TO SLEEP. Striker obliges and that's that.

Really flat show this week. Hopefully business will pick up after the draft.

EDIT: I originally wrote this before the draft show, just didn't get a chance to type it up until last night. I'd say that business indeed picked up, what with Vince McMahon BLOWING THE FUCK UP and all. Hrmph. I'll be back later today with the current show. Lots of Vinc-entric (look, a new word!) entertainment that I was able to blow through really quickly. Tremendous!

Friday Night SmackDown! 6/8/2007: For and Against

2007-06-11T03:14:00.000-05:00

FOR: Cartoon Edge in the credits.

FOR: Sign of the Week: "Crude, Lewd, and Booed"

AGAINST: Vince for president, JBL?

FOR: Vince is mad at Edge?

AGAINST: Vince's accent.

FOR: That very strange Finlay/Hornswaggle video package.

FOR: They should always be this short.

AGAINST: Cole: "That's not necessary!"

AGAINST: Long standing in the background like he's supposed to be there.

FOR: The creeped-out look on Kristal's face as Vince enters the office.

AGAINST: Vince seeing what Teddy doesn't.

FOR: Daivari's still around?

AGAINST: Did Noble's arm actually snap?

FOR: Cole on 'Tinker to Evers to Chance': "Glad you're using references from the 1930's." JBL: "Actually, the 20s."

FOR: JBL giving Noble the Matt Hardy treatment.

FOR: SLICED BREAD #3!!! That's what I'm calling it.

AGAINST: Is Edge wearing a watch?

AGAINST: You know the straits are dire when you're using Steven Hunter in your season ticket commercials.

FOR: This match.

FOR: The crowd reaction to Benoit hitting the turnbuckle chest-first.

AGAINST: Did JBL just reference Criss Angel?

FOR: Benoit's rolling verticals/rolling Germans transition.

FOR: This match.

FOR: I've been waiting for that counter for years.

FOR: That rocked.

AGAINST: Seriously, WTF?!?

AGAINST: How has no one made a Billy Donovan joke tonight?

AGAINST: JBL, I'll tell you the same thing I told Cole. it's "Ballin'", not "Ball-In."

FOR: This match, somewhat surprisingly.

Video Vault 24 - HUSS!

2007-06-06T12:14:00.000-05:00

The end results of the cage match with Whitmer...

Lots of nifty stuff this time around. I was trying to pull only the newest matches I could find, hoping that maybe people here hadn't seen them. Not sure if anyone watches these, though, so there you go! It's interesting that no one seems to post the new TNA stuff. Don't know if that means anything in particular, though, or if I'm just not looking hard enough.

Jimmy Jacobs v. BJ Whitmer - Last Man Standing (ROH - Battle of the Icons - 1.27.07)

(16:16)

Jimmy Jacobs, Adam Pearce & Lacey v. BJ Whitmer, Colt Cabana & Daisy Haze - Street Fight (ROH - Fifth Year Anniversary:Philly - 2.17.07)

(14:12)

Jimmy Jacobs v. BJ Whitmer - Cage match (ROH - Supercard of Honor II - 3.31.07)

Part One (18:56)
Part Two (13:26)

Jacobs/Whitmer is pretty well the feud of the first half of the year, I imagine. The cage match is getting some early match of the year candidate buzz as well. Supposed to be quite the violent specatacle. All of this violence and bloodshed for Jacobs and his love of the lovely Lacey. It's almost poetic or something. Haven't seen it (or any of the ROH stuff I'm posting today, actually) myself. Again, I hate watching wrestling on my shitty ass monitor and I'll be buying all of these DVDs anyway, so I can wait.

Kevin Steen & El Generico v. Briscoe Brothers (ROH - Fifth Year Festival:Philly - 2.17.07)

Part One (11:11)
Part Two (7:45)

Steen and Generico need to MAN UP, DAWG! MAN UP! Gotta love the Briscoes.

MAN UP!

CIMA, Susumu Yokosuka & SHINGO v. Dragon Kid, Ryo Saito & Masaaki Mochizuki (ROH - Supercard of Honor II - 3.31.07)

Part One (19:27)
Part Two (14:08)

Not as good as the Dragon Gate six man from the first Supercard is what I've read. Still supposed to be a really fun match. There are also those who say that it was every bit as good as last year's match, but that it was hurt by having to follow the Jacobs/Whitmer cage match. Watch them both and decide for yourself!

Eddie Kingston v. Necro Butcher (IWA-MS: Strong Style Tournament 2005 - 12.30.05)

Can't do a VV post without exposing the world to more and more and more of the Necro Butcher. As an added bonus, you get Kingston, who's probably my favorite wrestler in the world right now. He gets his shit fucked up but good in this one, though. (13:00)

World's Greatest Tag Team v. Hardy Boyz - Ladder Match (WWE: One Night Stand 2007 - 6.3.07)

Meltzer seemed to dig this one when he was running down the show. I haven't watched any WWE TV this week, though, so I have no idea how it came off. I guess Shelton was the star of the match. Shame how he seems to be stuck in the background. I would have figured that he'd have stepped up a bit by now. (17:43)