ECW on Sci-Fi (10.24.06)

I'm back from my sickbed. Huzzah.

-Last week, shit happened. Odds are, more shit's to come this week.

-Opening montagery.

-RVD is out. To talk. Whoa...DUDE! He's wondering when Big Show will give him a title shot. Paul Heyman is out with an answer. If Van Dam wants a title match, he'll have to earn the contract. In a ladder match. With Show. Tonight. He turns his goon squad loose and they jump Van Dam. RVD quickly fights them off and clears the ring. Seriously, that has to be the least effective riot squad ever.

-Commercials. The movie that you probably missed was Pumpkinhead: Ashes to Ashes. Could never get into the original. But on the other hand, Lance Henriksen starred (and appears in this one as well). Also, the dude who plays Pinhead is in this one. It's all very complicated.

CM Punk v. Matt Striker -

What an interesting choice of tights by Striker. Tazz surmises that he walked into the Divas locker room by mistake. Big double leg takedown by Punk to start the match. They bust out some chain wrestling, but Punk is all like, "fuck that," and kicks Striker right in the face. Tremendous! They trade hammerlock reversals back and forth. Striker steps through the ropes to force the break, then kicks Punk's arm, which he has wrapped up in the ropes.

He charges in, but Punk takes him down with a drop toehold. He lays in some MMA-style knees from the sprawl. He hooks Strikers arms for the Welcome to Chicago, Motherfucker! but Striker counters free and lays in some forearms to the back of the neck. He slides Punk into the post. He grabs the injured arm and wraps it around the post, then slams it into the steps.

Striker does...I don't know...some sort of weird rolling armbar deal. Punk ends up in a Fujiwara armbar. Punk manages to escape. He fires back with forearm strikes, then sends Striker into the corner. He hits his running kneestrike/bulldog combo. He follows with a springboard clothesline. KENTA rush. He goes for the uranage, but Mike Knox jumps him. Punk quickly cleans house.

-Hardcore Holly versus Test is next!

-Commercials

Test v. Hardcore Holly -

Lots o' punches to start. Holly takes control and pummels Test with chops. Test wants more. Holly obliges. Test bails. Holly gives chase, but it was a ruse! Test nails him. He rams Holly into the steps, then sends him into the post. He rolls Holly back in and pounds on him. Corner whip, but Hardcore rebounds out with a clothesline. Legdrop gets a two count. He ties Test in the ropes and kicks away at him. Test bails once again.

Holly again gets suckered in. But this time, he blocks being rammed into the steps and sends Test into them instead. Test rolls in, cutting Holly off before he can do the same. He rolls him onto the apron and sets up for a suplex. What's everyone's fascination with killing Holly via apron suplexes? At any rate, it's Holly committing homicide here, suplexing Test to the floor.

-Commercials

During the break, Test made a miraculous recovery from being dead and went all superman, hoisting Holly in a bearhug and ramming him into the post over and over. Test reverses him into the corner and gets two. Back to the bearhug. They blow an Irish whip reversal spot. Holly kicks him and lays in a pair of back elbows. Clothesline off the top gets two. He goes for a whip, but Test counters, shortarming him into a powerslam for two.

Test climbs up top, but Holly hits the ropes and crotches him. Alabama Jam by Holly is good for a nearfall. Test shortarms another whip, driving a knee into Holly's gut. He goes for the pumphandle slam, but Holly slips away, looking for the Alabama Slam. Test hangs onto the ropes. Holly turns and kicks him low. He ducks the BIG boot and kicks Test in the gut. Test comes back with an eyerake. He sends Holly into the post, then rolls him up with a handful of tights to get the win. Postmatch, Test destroys Holly with a chair.

Didn't like this much. Don't like Test much. A correlation, perhaps?

-Still hyping the Marine. God.

-Backstage, Big Show and Paul Heyman chat. We can't hear them, but I'd assume that they're setting up dinner plans for after the show.

-Commercials

-Announcers blather on about Cyber Sunday. Which is long since over at this point.

-Rebecca interviews Sandman re: his potential match with Umaga at Cyber Sunday. Either you voted for him or you didn't. Whatever.

Rob Van Dam v. Big Show - Ladder Match -

We get the intros out of the way before the break.

-Commercials

RVD slides a ladder in. Show immediately kicks it back to the floor. Quick flurry by Van Dam, but Show quickly goes into maul mode. He whips RVD into the ladder, which is set up in the corner. He tries to knock down the contract down using the ladder, but RVD brings in a second ladder and drives it into Show's gut. He lines up and nails Show in the head. Looks like he's busted open. Van Dam heads up top. He pushes the ladder into Show, then comes off with a Van Daminator.

He lays the ladder on top of Show and hits Rolling Thunder. He goes for the contract, but Show shoves over the ladder and RVD takes a big bump onto the top rope. Show rams him into the ladder. He puts the ladder on top of Van Dam and stands on it. Ouchies! RVD tries to fire back, but takes a spear. Show slams him onto the ladder. Vader splash misses.

Van Dam lays in some shoulderblocks in the corner. He goes for one too many, though, as Show goozles and chokeslams him. Show sets up the ladder. Van Dam flies up it. He leaps over the top, landing in perfect position to 'rana Show over the top rope and to the floor. Van Dam quickly rolls back in and retrieves the contract unopposed.

To sum up:

RVD - happy
Show - not so much
Shane - quite underwhelmed

More later. After I do some of that sleeping thing I hear the kidz enjoy so much.

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