ECW on Sci-Fi (10.31.06)
-Clips of the ladder match from last week. Helpfully recapped by moi directly below this very recap. Go...read it now. I can wait.
-Paul Heyman congratulates RVD for earning his title match, but points out that, while he might have the match, Heyman is still calling the shots on what type of match it'll be. In other words, Extreme Elimination Chamber, bitch! Show and RVD are in. Four others will follow...
-Montage.
-Later, RVD and Hardcore Holly will square off with the formidable duo of Big Show & Test. Two great tastes that taste great together. Or make you want to vomit. YMMV, as always.
Kevin Thorn (w/Ariel) v. Sabu - Elim. Chamber Qualifier -
Thorn stuffs Sabu's obligatory single leg attempt, nailing him with a series of forearms. He bounces off the ropes and levels Sabu with a shoulderblock. Falling headbutt misses, though. Sabu dropkicks him in the knee, then follows with a legdrop. Sabu drops an elbow and Thorn rolls onto the apron. Another low dropkick by Sabu and Thorn bumps to the floor. Somersault pescado by Sabu!
He rolls Thorn back in, following with a slingshot splash. Cover gets two. Thorn comes back with a kneelift. He whips Sabu into the corner, but misses a splash. Attempted springboard something or another is caught by Thorn and turned into a sitout spinebuster. Cover gets two. He rams Sabu into the post (why is this happening in EVERY SINGLE MATCH as of late?) and picks up another nearfall.
Thorn hoists him for a slam. Sabu slips away, but can't avoid a kick to the gut. He goes for a whip, but Sabu vaults off the second rope and connects with a heel kick. Followed by a springboard clothesline. Followed by a springboard back elbow. I'm sensing a bit of a pattern forming here. Sabu covers, but Thorn is out at two.
Sabu climbs to the second rope, but Ariel is on the apron. Sabu is distracted and ends up diving into a clothesline. Thorn whips him into the corner, but again misses a splash. Sabu spikes him with a springboard tornado DDT, then follows with a slingshot somersault legdrop. He locks Thorn in the camel clutch and this one is over, folks.
-Rebecca interviews Sandman. A clown walks through the picture. Because it's Halloween, you see. Or was, when this aired, at any rate. Sandman + clown = cane, cane, cane, cane. For Sandman doesn't approve of clowns.
-There's a Diva costume contest later tonight. I know that I, for one, am sitting right at the edge of my seat.
-Commercials
-More hype for The Marine. Enough already.
-Hey! That music sounds familiar! And indeed, Daivari is back. Unfortunately, the Great Khali is with him. Words don't do justice to how much I'm not looking forward to seeing him work. At any rate, Daivari says stuff...
Daivari (w/Khali) v. Shannon Moore -
Cool. At least they're giving Daivari a chance to work. Bring back the Magic Carpet Ride and you have ratings GOLD! Moore goes eye to, err...nipple with Khali. Daivari backs the big man off, then turns and sucker punches Moore. He yanks Moore down by the hair and yep...rams him shoulderfirst into the post. He cranks on the injured arm for a bit, then locks Moore in a hammerlock, ramming him into the corner. Cover gets two.
He tries to ram him into the corner again, but Moore reverses. They trade strikes and Daivari goes for a whip. Moore ducks a punch and connects with a spinning heel kick. He whips Daivari into the corner, but charges into a boot. Daivari Stunners the injured arm and follows up with a nifty looking hammerlock DDT. Which I'm going to call FUCKING JIHAD ON YOU! until they bother to give it a name. Word. He covers and gets the win.
Postmatch, Khali tries to kill Moore with a chokeslam.
-Rebecca interviews Rob Van Dam. Extreme Elimination Chamber? Cool. Hardcore Holly walks up. He points out the irony of hurting his back while facing RVD and tonight, being the guy who's going to watch RVD's back. That's not so much irony there, Bob. But you'd beat my ass in under 10 seconds, so I'll roll with you on this one.
-Commercials. The movie you missed was Legion of the Dead. Who knew that Zach Galligan was still alive? They also plug Horrorfest, which is actually this coming weekend. So you horror buffs out there should check it out. I'd love to, but I have to work on Saturday and won't be around at all on Sunday. Fucking typical. This is why they invented DVD.
-Diva Costume contest. Trinity wins by being whorish. Mike Knox takes exception to Kelly Kelly's costume. Her being dressed as CM Punk (who now has official merch) and all. Punk hits the ring. Knox tosses him over the top, but he hangs on and levels Knox with a springboard clothesline. A series of kneelifts sends Knox scrambling to the back. Really, the only part of this you should care about is the camera cutting to the crowd and showing Colt Cabana in a pink fairy costume. Heh. Colt is awesome.
-Commercials
-Mike Knox challenges Punk to stop ducking him. He wants a match next week.
-Intros for the main event.
-Commercials
Rob Van Dam & Hardcore Holly v. Test & Big Show -
Test pounds on RVD. Because it's all the offense he has, you see. He whips Van Dam into the corner, but runs into a back elbow. Van Dam springs out of the corner looking for a crossbody, but Test catches him. Snake Eyes? Nah. RVD slips away and shoves Test into the corner. He follows with a thrust kick. Test charges and, this time, eats a spinkick. Holly tags in and proceeds to beat Test down in the corner. Test reverses him into the corner, but charges into another back elbow. He's not too bright, that one. Van Dam tags in. He connects with a seated dropkick and drops a leg. Cover only gets a one count.
Test cuts him off with an eyerake and rams him into the corner. He rams RVD into Show's boot, then sends him into the ropes. RVD hangs on. Test charges...low bridge. Test lands on the apron. Van Dam tries to knock him off and finally succeeds with a dropkick. Test climbs back onto the apron. He nails a charging RVD and has a shot for Holly as well. He turns and RVD dives over the top, hitting a crossbody and sending both guys crashing off the apron and to the floor. Okay, that was neat.
-Commercials
RVD is hitting his shoulderblocks in the corner when we come back from break. Test responds with a clothesline. He whips RVD into the ropes and ducks his head. Van Dam rolls over him. He catches a kick from Test and hits his windmill kick. Both guys tag. Holly kicks away at Show's legs. Show casually shoves him into the ropes and levels him with a clothesline. He mauls Holly for a bit. Holly fires back with chops, but ends up running into a big boot. Show drops an elbow and gets two.
Test tags back in. He rams Holly shoulderfirst into the post. Twice. He catches Holly with a back elbow and tags Show. Vader splash misses, as usual. Tag to Van Dam. He repeatedly clips Show's knee, finally taking him down with a spinkick to the knee. He knocks Test off of the apron and heads up top. Somersault bodyblock knocks Show back down. Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder. Cover, save by Test.
Everyone brawls. Show drops RVD across the top rope. The ref is bumped after Test accidentally annihilates him with a Northern Lariat. Test turns and gets spikes with an Alabama Slam. Show then knocks Holly to the floor with a big boot. He turns and eats a Ryder kick. Show bails, pulling RVD out with him. They brawl on the floor for a few seconds and a dude in a gorilla suit jumps the rail and attacks RVD with a pipe. Back in the ring, Show plants him with a chokeslam and gets the win.
Heels celebrate. The gorilla is unmasked as Heyman himself, of course...
-Paul Heyman congratulates RVD for earning his title match, but points out that, while he might have the match, Heyman is still calling the shots on what type of match it'll be. In other words, Extreme Elimination Chamber, bitch! Show and RVD are in. Four others will follow...
-Montage.
-Later, RVD and Hardcore Holly will square off with the formidable duo of Big Show & Test. Two great tastes that taste great together. Or make you want to vomit. YMMV, as always.
Kevin Thorn (w/Ariel) v. Sabu - Elim. Chamber Qualifier -
Thorn stuffs Sabu's obligatory single leg attempt, nailing him with a series of forearms. He bounces off the ropes and levels Sabu with a shoulderblock. Falling headbutt misses, though. Sabu dropkicks him in the knee, then follows with a legdrop. Sabu drops an elbow and Thorn rolls onto the apron. Another low dropkick by Sabu and Thorn bumps to the floor. Somersault pescado by Sabu!
He rolls Thorn back in, following with a slingshot splash. Cover gets two. Thorn comes back with a kneelift. He whips Sabu into the corner, but misses a splash. Attempted springboard something or another is caught by Thorn and turned into a sitout spinebuster. Cover gets two. He rams Sabu into the post (why is this happening in EVERY SINGLE MATCH as of late?) and picks up another nearfall.
Thorn hoists him for a slam. Sabu slips away, but can't avoid a kick to the gut. He goes for a whip, but Sabu vaults off the second rope and connects with a heel kick. Followed by a springboard clothesline. Followed by a springboard back elbow. I'm sensing a bit of a pattern forming here. Sabu covers, but Thorn is out at two.
Sabu climbs to the second rope, but Ariel is on the apron. Sabu is distracted and ends up diving into a clothesline. Thorn whips him into the corner, but again misses a splash. Sabu spikes him with a springboard tornado DDT, then follows with a slingshot somersault legdrop. He locks Thorn in the camel clutch and this one is over, folks.
-Rebecca interviews Sandman. A clown walks through the picture. Because it's Halloween, you see. Or was, when this aired, at any rate. Sandman + clown = cane, cane, cane, cane. For Sandman doesn't approve of clowns.
-There's a Diva costume contest later tonight. I know that I, for one, am sitting right at the edge of my seat.
-Commercials
-More hype for The Marine. Enough already.
-Hey! That music sounds familiar! And indeed, Daivari is back. Unfortunately, the Great Khali is with him. Words don't do justice to how much I'm not looking forward to seeing him work. At any rate, Daivari says stuff...
Daivari (w/Khali) v. Shannon Moore -
Cool. At least they're giving Daivari a chance to work. Bring back the Magic Carpet Ride and you have ratings GOLD! Moore goes eye to, err...nipple with Khali. Daivari backs the big man off, then turns and sucker punches Moore. He yanks Moore down by the hair and yep...rams him shoulderfirst into the post. He cranks on the injured arm for a bit, then locks Moore in a hammerlock, ramming him into the corner. Cover gets two.
He tries to ram him into the corner again, but Moore reverses. They trade strikes and Daivari goes for a whip. Moore ducks a punch and connects with a spinning heel kick. He whips Daivari into the corner, but charges into a boot. Daivari Stunners the injured arm and follows up with a nifty looking hammerlock DDT. Which I'm going to call FUCKING JIHAD ON YOU! until they bother to give it a name. Word. He covers and gets the win.
Postmatch, Khali tries to kill Moore with a chokeslam.
-Rebecca interviews Rob Van Dam. Extreme Elimination Chamber? Cool. Hardcore Holly walks up. He points out the irony of hurting his back while facing RVD and tonight, being the guy who's going to watch RVD's back. That's not so much irony there, Bob. But you'd beat my ass in under 10 seconds, so I'll roll with you on this one.
-Commercials. The movie you missed was Legion of the Dead. Who knew that Zach Galligan was still alive? They also plug Horrorfest, which is actually this coming weekend. So you horror buffs out there should check it out. I'd love to, but I have to work on Saturday and won't be around at all on Sunday. Fucking typical. This is why they invented DVD.
-Diva Costume contest. Trinity wins by being whorish. Mike Knox takes exception to Kelly Kelly's costume. Her being dressed as CM Punk (who now has official merch) and all. Punk hits the ring. Knox tosses him over the top, but he hangs on and levels Knox with a springboard clothesline. A series of kneelifts sends Knox scrambling to the back. Really, the only part of this you should care about is the camera cutting to the crowd and showing Colt Cabana in a pink fairy costume. Heh. Colt is awesome.
-Commercials
-Mike Knox challenges Punk to stop ducking him. He wants a match next week.
-Intros for the main event.
-Commercials
Rob Van Dam & Hardcore Holly v. Test & Big Show -
Test pounds on RVD. Because it's all the offense he has, you see. He whips Van Dam into the corner, but runs into a back elbow. Van Dam springs out of the corner looking for a crossbody, but Test catches him. Snake Eyes? Nah. RVD slips away and shoves Test into the corner. He follows with a thrust kick. Test charges and, this time, eats a spinkick. Holly tags in and proceeds to beat Test down in the corner. Test reverses him into the corner, but charges into another back elbow. He's not too bright, that one. Van Dam tags in. He connects with a seated dropkick and drops a leg. Cover only gets a one count.
Test cuts him off with an eyerake and rams him into the corner. He rams RVD into Show's boot, then sends him into the ropes. RVD hangs on. Test charges...low bridge. Test lands on the apron. Van Dam tries to knock him off and finally succeeds with a dropkick. Test climbs back onto the apron. He nails a charging RVD and has a shot for Holly as well. He turns and RVD dives over the top, hitting a crossbody and sending both guys crashing off the apron and to the floor. Okay, that was neat.
-Commercials
RVD is hitting his shoulderblocks in the corner when we come back from break. Test responds with a clothesline. He whips RVD into the ropes and ducks his head. Van Dam rolls over him. He catches a kick from Test and hits his windmill kick. Both guys tag. Holly kicks away at Show's legs. Show casually shoves him into the ropes and levels him with a clothesline. He mauls Holly for a bit. Holly fires back with chops, but ends up running into a big boot. Show drops an elbow and gets two.
Test tags back in. He rams Holly shoulderfirst into the post. Twice. He catches Holly with a back elbow and tags Show. Vader splash misses, as usual. Tag to Van Dam. He repeatedly clips Show's knee, finally taking him down with a spinkick to the knee. He knocks Test off of the apron and heads up top. Somersault bodyblock knocks Show back down. Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder. Cover, save by Test.
Everyone brawls. Show drops RVD across the top rope. The ref is bumped after Test accidentally annihilates him with a Northern Lariat. Test turns and gets spikes with an Alabama Slam. Show then knocks Holly to the floor with a big boot. He turns and eats a Ryder kick. Show bails, pulling RVD out with him. They brawl on the floor for a few seconds and a dude in a gorilla suit jumps the rail and attacks RVD with a pipe. Back in the ring, Show plants him with a chokeslam and gets the win.
Heels celebrate. The gorilla is unmasked as Heyman himself, of course...
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