ECW Hardcore TV - 3.19.96
-We open with a replay of the Douglas/Pillman angle from last week's show.
Bad Crew v. El Puerto Ricano & Damien Stone (JIP) -
Ricano (AKA Ubas and he was Babu in the WWF as well) totally whiffs on a dive and smashes his face on the floor. Bad Crew hit a double back elbow on Stone (AKA Little Guido/Nunzio). Double Stroke follows. Ricano comes off the top and clotheslines both guys. They recover and toss him out. In the ring, they hit the Hart Attack on Stone, with one of the members of the Bad Crew coming off the second rope. Tiger Driver by...Bad Crew #1. Yeah, that'll work.
Cut to the entrance, where Brian Pillman is walking out with his agent (Elliot Pollack), a lawyer and his "bodyguard," Harry Boatswain (who played for the Eagles at the time). Pillman hits the ring and attacks anything that has a pulse. He wants Joey Styles in the ring for some reason. Styles obliges. Pillman...hugs him? Styles is confused. Pillman tells Shane Douglas that, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. And the Rogue Horseman is here."
Douglas appears in the Eagle's Nest. He swears a bunch and heads to the ring. Pillman and his entourage leave. The entire referee crew is out to stop Douglas. He leads the crowd in an ECW chant and tears his shirt off. "Fuckin' Hogan...that was easy." Tod Gordon walks out and we go to break. This might have played out well live, but not so much on TV. The angle last week was super intense. This was just sorta lame.
-The Bruise Brothers come out. Great...another team that looks exactly alike. At least I can kinda sorta tell them apart. We cut to a promo with Tommy Dreamer and Beulah. Dreamer's arm is in a sling. He says that the second he heals, he promises to make one of the Bruise Brothers an only child. Harsh.
Bruise Brothers v. Pitbulls (w/Francine) -
Pitbull #2 opens with, I believe, Don Harris. He pounds on #2 and hits him with a pair of clotheslines in the corner. He whips Ron Harris toward the corner, but #2 ducks out of the way and clothesline Don. Christ. One team looks identical and has names that rhyme and the other team goes by numbers. GIMME SOMETHING TO WORK WITH HERE! Match clips forward and I realize it doesn't matter who's who, as everyone is brawling around the building and pretty much all we can see is the crowd.
Many moons later, Pitbull #1 and a Harris (lets call him Don!) roll back into the ring. We clip forward and the Pitbulls hit him with a Superbomb. Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie run out. Stevie low blows the Pitbulls as Francine kicks the shit out of Meanie. She turns and eats a Steviekick. Bruise Brothers set up to crotch Pitbull #2 on the ringpost (which flashes back to their turn on Dreamer), but Dreamer runs out, wielding a piece of metal. He beats everyone down, then rips off the sling, revealing a fake arm to be used as plunder. OMG SWERVE! Faces destroy the heels for a bit until they escape.
That was something. I guess.
-Taz/Fonzie promo. Taz talks about Chris Jericho, saying that he was trained to wrestle by Stu Hart, trained to defend himself by Chris Benoit, trained to fly by Brian Pillman and he'll be trained to suffer...by Taz. Cut to Joey Styles, who tells us that we'll see that match next week. This week's main event, you ask? Rey Misterio versus Juventud Guerrera. Two out of three falls. Fuck yeah. But first, we get highlights from their 2/3 falls match the previous show in Queens. Again...fuck yeah.
Rey Misterio Jr v. Juventud Guerrera - 2/3 Falls (JIP) -
Juvi whips Rey into the corner, but charges into spin kick. Rey's turn for the whip. Juvi reverses it, but Rey takes him over with a satellite headscissors, sending him to the floor. As soon as Rey follows him out, Juvi slides back in. Rey isn't impressed. He climbs onto the apron...springboard 'rana! Juvi again rolls out. Rey charges the ropes and does the Tiger/619 feint, but Juvi avoids it with ease. He's not so quick to dodge the somersault pescado into a 'rana, though. And a big holy shit to that!
Match jumps forward, with Juvi missing a HUGE legdrop off the top. Rey plants him with a Doctor Bomb and picks up a two count. He needs to bring that back to his moveset, stat. Not that he could do it to anyone that he wrestles at this point, but still. He follows with an Ocean Cyclone suplex and takes the first fall. Primera Caida, if you weeeeeel! Match clips forward. Rey is looking to 'rana Juvi off the top, but gets shrugged off.
He lands on his feet and sprints forward. He goes for a springboard 'rana, but Juvi counters into a sitout powerbomb off the second rope and gets two. He slams Rey and follows with a somersault legdrop off the top for another nearfall. Dragon suplex is enough to finish Rey for fall number two. Match clips and Juvi sends Rey into the ropes. He floats onto the apron, but Juvi immediately hits him with a springboard dropkick, sending him to the floor.
Juvi follows with a somersault plancha and rolls Rey in. He goes for a springboard 'rana, but Rey counters into a powerbomb for two. We jump forward and Rey nails Juvi with a baseball slide dropkick to the floor, sending Juvi into the crowd. Rey tells everyone to move, then hits a somersault springboard dive over the rail!
Match clips forward once again. This time, Rey is up top, looking for...something or another. He doesn't get a chance to figure it out, as Juvi cuts him off and absolutely DRILLS him with a disgusting looking brainbuster off the top. That was awesome. Or perhaps JUICY. Unless you happen to be Rey, I guess. Juvi covers, takes the third fall and the match!
Rey Misterio Jr v. Juventud Guerrera - 2/3 Falls -
Rey offers a handshake. Juvi spits in his face. Rey spits right back. He takes Juvi down and locks him in a surfboard submission. Juvi breaks and starts working on Rey's leg, but it's countered and Rey locks him in the sickle hold. Juvi forces a rope break. Lockup, Juvi takes Rey over with a Northern Lights suplex for two. Rey sits him up top and gives him a 'rana for a nearfall of his own. Whip by Juvi. Rey rolls through a sunset flip attempt and cradles him for another nearfall.
They do a quick Lucha knucklelock sequence with each guy getting a brief advantage. Then it's time for dueling quebradora attempts. Rey is unsuccessful. So is Juvi, as Rey turns it into a headscissors takedown. Cover gets two. Juvi fires back with chops. He whips Rey into the ropes, but again gets taken down by a satellite headscissors. Juvi sidesteps a dive attempt, but Rey floats onto the apron and kicks him. Arabian press to the floor!
He rolls Juvi in and heads up top. Juvi cuts him off and goes for an Electric Chair drop out of the corner. Rey counters into a sunset flip powerbomb for a nearfall. Juvi comes back with a brainbuster. He goes for a whip, but Rey reverses it. Juvi slides between his legs and nails him with a spin kick. He charges, with Rey elevating him onto the apron. Springboard somersault dropkick by Juvi! Crowd chants, "Rudo" at him. He quickly follows with a dragon suplex to take the first fall!
Rey recoups on the floor. Juvi isn't really paying attention, so Rey sprints in and grabs a side headlock. Juvi shoots him into the ropes, but both go down after a collision. Rey is up first. 'Rana gets two. Juvi reverses a whip, sending Rey into the corner. He charges, but Rey avoids him and Juvi crashes upside down into the corner. He rolls onto the apron as Rey heads up top. 'Rana from the apron to the floor by Rey! Awesome.
Rey rolls into the ring. He does his bit where he vaults over the referee, diving over the top and connecting with a somersault plancha. He rolls Juvi in. Powerbomb gets two. As does a quebrada. He goes for a whip, but Juvi counters into a shortarm clothesline. He comes off the top with a crossbody, but Rey is waiting with a dropkick. He plants Juvi with a Doctor Bomb and takes the second fall. We're all tied up.
Third fall starts quickly, as Juvi charges across the ring and hits a dropkick. He sits Rey up top. Juvi climbs to the second rope then hits another dropkick, sending Rey bumping all the way to the floor. Juvi follows with a baseball slide dropkick, then tosses Rey into the crowd. Asai moonsault over the railing! He rolls Rey in and hits a springboard spin kick for a nearfall.
He goes for a springboard somersault legdrop, but no one is home. Rey sits him up top, but Juvi shrugs off a 'rana attempt. He comes off the top looking for a 'rana of his own, but Rey sticks him with a powerbomb for his trouble. Cover gets two. He takes Juvi over with a Northern Lights suplex, then goes for a springboard moonsault. Juvi rolls out of the way, but Rey manages to land on his feet.
Juvi presses him, then drops him into a fallaway slam for a nearfall. Nifty move. Rey reverses a whip and catches Juvi with a spin kick. Juvi bails. Baseball slide 'rana by Rey! He whips Juvi into the crowd and nails him with a chair. Springboard somersault plancha into the crowd! They brawl out the front door of the Arena and Rey rams Juvi into a garage door.
Juvi fires right back and ends up powerbombing Rey on the hood of a car! Rey kicks him away, then dives off the car and takes Juvi down with a 'rana! They head back to ringside. Rey tosses a chair in Juvi's face. Crowd wants a table. Back in the ring, Rey charges. Juvi elevates him onto the top turnbuckle.
Rey gets into position for something, but Juvi cuts him off. He's looking for Splash Mountain, but if you've ever watched a Rey match, you know that move almost never works. Sure enough, it's reversed into a 'rana midmove. Rey covers and gets the win! Postmatch, Rey puts Juvi through a table with a sitout powerbomb.
Tremendous match. No commercials. No clipping. Just wrestling. TNA could learn something from watching these shows. At any rate, these are two of my absolute favorite ECW matches. Both are ****+ stars easy.
-Brian Pillman promo. He's dressed as a chef (!), preparing a meal for Gary Juster (he was one of the WCW suits). He spits in it before sending it along.
-Miserlou segment. Here's what we get:
-"WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT...TAZ?" Yep, he's the guy that started it, folks.
-Sandman & Missy Hyatt do that creepy "mommy" thing that I'd prefer to forget.
-JT Smith tells us that he's conned us all into believing that he's clumsy. In fact, he's one smart Italiano.
-Eliminators promo. Perry Saturn talks about taking out Francine, saying that their only regret is that she wasn't pregnant like Beulah. Two birds with one Total Elimination and whatnot.
-Raven promo. He talks about the difference between he and Dreamer, saying that Dreamer loves everything, but that the only thing he loved in his entire life was Beulah. Kimona looks sad. He says that Dreamer only loved her, "when you found out what was in her box."
-More JT Smith tomfoolery. He tells he's not clumsy...as the interview set collapses on him.
-Pillman promo. He signs an autograph for a fan. The guy thanks him and Pillman says, "It's all a work, you know." He looks at the camera and says that he's not the Loose Cannon...as he repeatedly stabs himself in the arm with a fork.
Bad Crew v. El Puerto Ricano & Damien Stone (JIP) -
Ricano (AKA Ubas and he was Babu in the WWF as well) totally whiffs on a dive and smashes his face on the floor. Bad Crew hit a double back elbow on Stone (AKA Little Guido/Nunzio). Double Stroke follows. Ricano comes off the top and clotheslines both guys. They recover and toss him out. In the ring, they hit the Hart Attack on Stone, with one of the members of the Bad Crew coming off the second rope. Tiger Driver by...Bad Crew #1. Yeah, that'll work.
Cut to the entrance, where Brian Pillman is walking out with his agent (Elliot Pollack), a lawyer and his "bodyguard," Harry Boatswain (who played for the Eagles at the time). Pillman hits the ring and attacks anything that has a pulse. He wants Joey Styles in the ring for some reason. Styles obliges. Pillman...hugs him? Styles is confused. Pillman tells Shane Douglas that, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. And the Rogue Horseman is here."
Douglas appears in the Eagle's Nest. He swears a bunch and heads to the ring. Pillman and his entourage leave. The entire referee crew is out to stop Douglas. He leads the crowd in an ECW chant and tears his shirt off. "Fuckin' Hogan...that was easy." Tod Gordon walks out and we go to break. This might have played out well live, but not so much on TV. The angle last week was super intense. This was just sorta lame.
-The Bruise Brothers come out. Great...another team that looks exactly alike. At least I can kinda sorta tell them apart. We cut to a promo with Tommy Dreamer and Beulah. Dreamer's arm is in a sling. He says that the second he heals, he promises to make one of the Bruise Brothers an only child. Harsh.
Bruise Brothers v. Pitbulls (w/Francine) -
Pitbull #2 opens with, I believe, Don Harris. He pounds on #2 and hits him with a pair of clotheslines in the corner. He whips Ron Harris toward the corner, but #2 ducks out of the way and clothesline Don. Christ. One team looks identical and has names that rhyme and the other team goes by numbers. GIMME SOMETHING TO WORK WITH HERE! Match clips forward and I realize it doesn't matter who's who, as everyone is brawling around the building and pretty much all we can see is the crowd.
Many moons later, Pitbull #1 and a Harris (lets call him Don!) roll back into the ring. We clip forward and the Pitbulls hit him with a Superbomb. Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie run out. Stevie low blows the Pitbulls as Francine kicks the shit out of Meanie. She turns and eats a Steviekick. Bruise Brothers set up to crotch Pitbull #2 on the ringpost (which flashes back to their turn on Dreamer), but Dreamer runs out, wielding a piece of metal. He beats everyone down, then rips off the sling, revealing a fake arm to be used as plunder. OMG SWERVE! Faces destroy the heels for a bit until they escape.
That was something. I guess.
-Taz/Fonzie promo. Taz talks about Chris Jericho, saying that he was trained to wrestle by Stu Hart, trained to defend himself by Chris Benoit, trained to fly by Brian Pillman and he'll be trained to suffer...by Taz. Cut to Joey Styles, who tells us that we'll see that match next week. This week's main event, you ask? Rey Misterio versus Juventud Guerrera. Two out of three falls. Fuck yeah. But first, we get highlights from their 2/3 falls match the previous show in Queens. Again...fuck yeah.
Rey Misterio Jr v. Juventud Guerrera - 2/3 Falls (JIP) -
Juvi whips Rey into the corner, but charges into spin kick. Rey's turn for the whip. Juvi reverses it, but Rey takes him over with a satellite headscissors, sending him to the floor. As soon as Rey follows him out, Juvi slides back in. Rey isn't impressed. He climbs onto the apron...springboard 'rana! Juvi again rolls out. Rey charges the ropes and does the Tiger/619 feint, but Juvi avoids it with ease. He's not so quick to dodge the somersault pescado into a 'rana, though. And a big holy shit to that!
Match jumps forward, with Juvi missing a HUGE legdrop off the top. Rey plants him with a Doctor Bomb and picks up a two count. He needs to bring that back to his moveset, stat. Not that he could do it to anyone that he wrestles at this point, but still. He follows with an Ocean Cyclone suplex and takes the first fall. Primera Caida, if you weeeeeel! Match clips forward. Rey is looking to 'rana Juvi off the top, but gets shrugged off.
He lands on his feet and sprints forward. He goes for a springboard 'rana, but Juvi counters into a sitout powerbomb off the second rope and gets two. He slams Rey and follows with a somersault legdrop off the top for another nearfall. Dragon suplex is enough to finish Rey for fall number two. Match clips and Juvi sends Rey into the ropes. He floats onto the apron, but Juvi immediately hits him with a springboard dropkick, sending him to the floor.
Juvi follows with a somersault plancha and rolls Rey in. He goes for a springboard 'rana, but Rey counters into a powerbomb for two. We jump forward and Rey nails Juvi with a baseball slide dropkick to the floor, sending Juvi into the crowd. Rey tells everyone to move, then hits a somersault springboard dive over the rail!
Match clips forward once again. This time, Rey is up top, looking for...something or another. He doesn't get a chance to figure it out, as Juvi cuts him off and absolutely DRILLS him with a disgusting looking brainbuster off the top. That was awesome. Or perhaps JUICY. Unless you happen to be Rey, I guess. Juvi covers, takes the third fall and the match!
Rey Misterio Jr v. Juventud Guerrera - 2/3 Falls -
Rey offers a handshake. Juvi spits in his face. Rey spits right back. He takes Juvi down and locks him in a surfboard submission. Juvi breaks and starts working on Rey's leg, but it's countered and Rey locks him in the sickle hold. Juvi forces a rope break. Lockup, Juvi takes Rey over with a Northern Lights suplex for two. Rey sits him up top and gives him a 'rana for a nearfall of his own. Whip by Juvi. Rey rolls through a sunset flip attempt and cradles him for another nearfall.
They do a quick Lucha knucklelock sequence with each guy getting a brief advantage. Then it's time for dueling quebradora attempts. Rey is unsuccessful. So is Juvi, as Rey turns it into a headscissors takedown. Cover gets two. Juvi fires back with chops. He whips Rey into the ropes, but again gets taken down by a satellite headscissors. Juvi sidesteps a dive attempt, but Rey floats onto the apron and kicks him. Arabian press to the floor!
He rolls Juvi in and heads up top. Juvi cuts him off and goes for an Electric Chair drop out of the corner. Rey counters into a sunset flip powerbomb for a nearfall. Juvi comes back with a brainbuster. He goes for a whip, but Rey reverses it. Juvi slides between his legs and nails him with a spin kick. He charges, with Rey elevating him onto the apron. Springboard somersault dropkick by Juvi! Crowd chants, "Rudo" at him. He quickly follows with a dragon suplex to take the first fall!
Rey recoups on the floor. Juvi isn't really paying attention, so Rey sprints in and grabs a side headlock. Juvi shoots him into the ropes, but both go down after a collision. Rey is up first. 'Rana gets two. Juvi reverses a whip, sending Rey into the corner. He charges, but Rey avoids him and Juvi crashes upside down into the corner. He rolls onto the apron as Rey heads up top. 'Rana from the apron to the floor by Rey! Awesome.
Rey rolls into the ring. He does his bit where he vaults over the referee, diving over the top and connecting with a somersault plancha. He rolls Juvi in. Powerbomb gets two. As does a quebrada. He goes for a whip, but Juvi counters into a shortarm clothesline. He comes off the top with a crossbody, but Rey is waiting with a dropkick. He plants Juvi with a Doctor Bomb and takes the second fall. We're all tied up.
Third fall starts quickly, as Juvi charges across the ring and hits a dropkick. He sits Rey up top. Juvi climbs to the second rope then hits another dropkick, sending Rey bumping all the way to the floor. Juvi follows with a baseball slide dropkick, then tosses Rey into the crowd. Asai moonsault over the railing! He rolls Rey in and hits a springboard spin kick for a nearfall.
He goes for a springboard somersault legdrop, but no one is home. Rey sits him up top, but Juvi shrugs off a 'rana attempt. He comes off the top looking for a 'rana of his own, but Rey sticks him with a powerbomb for his trouble. Cover gets two. He takes Juvi over with a Northern Lights suplex, then goes for a springboard moonsault. Juvi rolls out of the way, but Rey manages to land on his feet.
Juvi presses him, then drops him into a fallaway slam for a nearfall. Nifty move. Rey reverses a whip and catches Juvi with a spin kick. Juvi bails. Baseball slide 'rana by Rey! He whips Juvi into the crowd and nails him with a chair. Springboard somersault plancha into the crowd! They brawl out the front door of the Arena and Rey rams Juvi into a garage door.
Juvi fires right back and ends up powerbombing Rey on the hood of a car! Rey kicks him away, then dives off the car and takes Juvi down with a 'rana! They head back to ringside. Rey tosses a chair in Juvi's face. Crowd wants a table. Back in the ring, Rey charges. Juvi elevates him onto the top turnbuckle.
Rey gets into position for something, but Juvi cuts him off. He's looking for Splash Mountain, but if you've ever watched a Rey match, you know that move almost never works. Sure enough, it's reversed into a 'rana midmove. Rey covers and gets the win! Postmatch, Rey puts Juvi through a table with a sitout powerbomb.
Tremendous match. No commercials. No clipping. Just wrestling. TNA could learn something from watching these shows. At any rate, these are two of my absolute favorite ECW matches. Both are ****+ stars easy.
-Brian Pillman promo. He's dressed as a chef (!), preparing a meal for Gary Juster (he was one of the WCW suits). He spits in it before sending it along.
-Miserlou segment. Here's what we get:
-"WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT...TAZ?" Yep, he's the guy that started it, folks.
-Sandman & Missy Hyatt do that creepy "mommy" thing that I'd prefer to forget.
-JT Smith tells us that he's conned us all into believing that he's clumsy. In fact, he's one smart Italiano.
-Eliminators promo. Perry Saturn talks about taking out Francine, saying that their only regret is that she wasn't pregnant like Beulah. Two birds with one Total Elimination and whatnot.
-Raven promo. He talks about the difference between he and Dreamer, saying that Dreamer loves everything, but that the only thing he loved in his entire life was Beulah. Kimona looks sad. He says that Dreamer only loved her, "when you found out what was in her box."
-More JT Smith tomfoolery. He tells he's not clumsy...as the interview set collapses on him.
-Pillman promo. He signs an autograph for a fan. The guy thanks him and Pillman says, "It's all a work, you know." He looks at the camera and says that he's not the Loose Cannon...as he repeatedly stabs himself in the arm with a fork.
Comments