Raw In 90 Seconds

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Vince: I was sodomized by my dad, but that's still not as bad as what I'm doing to Shelton Benjamin's career.

KANE: *KABOOM*
HBK: Dear Lord, keep that pyromaniac from killing me.
Vince: You kick, I cut another promo.
HBK: :(
Kane: whap
Kane: whap
HBK: points to contract
Kane: Oh, right.
HBK: inverted atomic drop clothesline scoop slam Savage elbow
Vince: points to above
HBK: :(
Kane: chokeslam
Vince: :)
Kane: And evil will always beat good, because good is dumb.

Gregory Helms: Fuck Lawler! I'll win! You see how well it worked at last year's NYR with Muh...oh, hell.

Todd: Last week....whoa...
Trish: No, sir, I didn't like it.

Victoria: RAR!
Maria: Puppies are cute.
Victoria: smash
Maria: rollup
Victoria: WTF, mate?
Victoria, Torrie & Candice: stompy stompy stomp
Vince: Hey, all you bitches are getting PG-13 Sunday. I'm the police all up in this bitch.
Chloe: looks suddenly afraid

Mickie: Trish, let me just say I...
Trish: No, let me...
(minute-long kiss)
Mickie & Trish: BUTCH, STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!
Butch: Ah, hell. I guess that's girl talk for "zip up my pants and stop doing that".

Edge: WHOO! WHOO, I TELL YOU IN A HILARIOUS FASHION, WHOO!
Flair: GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT, MOTHERFUCKER!
Flair: puts Lita in the figure 4
Lita: Well, it had been about 17 minutes since I was on my back last.
Edge: Crazy old bastard. C'mere, baby.
Flair: Kids.

Shelton: Remember when I teamed with Charlie Hass? Weren't those good times? I mean, you guys liked it, right? Wasn't it good?
Masters: pointing to sheet with WWE ladder on it
Shelton: Yeah, yeah.
Shelton: jobs

Triple H: RAR! SMRT!
Production Guy In The Back: No Christmas bonus, huh?
Triple H: That bitch is so fired. And there will be no comeuppance! You hear me?! NO COMEUPPANCE!
Big Show: Allow me, and my new friend Mr. Cast, to retort.
Big Show: smash
Triple H: Eep.
Big Show: smash
Triple H: EEP.
Big Show: smash
Triple H: Sir, I am not a coward. That being said...
Triple H: flees

Black People Everywhere: Oh, lord...

Cena: 'Cause I'm the miggity miggity miggity miggity mack daddy...what the...
Mickie: Did you call me?
Cena: No. MIGGITY. Not Mickie.
Mickie: Oh. Well, I have to go back in the shower and eat Trish ou---BUTCH!
Butch, with hilarious Spanish accent: Butch no is here. Me llamo Pancho.

Girls In The House: YEAH~!
Guys In The House: BOO!
Cena: Don't be hatin'. :(
Angle: Tap!
Cena: No!
Angle: You sure? I mean, this is a first-blood match, so you wouldn't lose, and it's non-title so...
Cena: I said no!
Angle: Well, fine then.
Angle: smash
Cena: bleeds
Angle: That's for Pete Nice, you trick-ass busta!
Announcer: Welcome to Finisher Bingo. Anklelock. Masterlock. Chokeslam. Chokeslam. Chokeslam...
Cast of Monty Python: GET ON WITH IT!
Announcer: Superkick. FU.
Cena: I won! Other than the match and this gusher...
Crowd: BOO!
Cena: Don't be hatin'. :(

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