Rawbservations 8:1
Sweet retro Whale jersey. Welcome to RAW...Is...Jerrrrrrrrricho! Next week makes it a day short of six years. Finger quotes: the true sign of a dick. YOUNG M.C.ENA! Nice! Moi's up there, too. Monkeys in the truck~! Nice touch having him rush out with no music prompt. I think he'd rather ruck your authority than buck it, Eric. Double gold with no finisher? That...that's cool.
Somebody get Shelton a back brace. This goes to prove what I've always known: gamblers love the Big Show. You're right, I've got nothing. Shelton is nuts for even thinking up a throw me to the top rope into a double springboard lariat spot, yet that's why he rules. SKILLET SKILLET SKILLET SKILLET. Show mocking Snitsky was funny. Someone should let Chris know after 1947 they continued to invent moves. Cobra clutch! Big Show just breaking it up is a great allusion to his mass. ASSISTED DRAGON WHIP! One floor--maybe two?, going down.
The retarded leading the retarded. Thank god. Eugene's not from Cleveland, and Kurt's not from a casino. Tell him, Kurt. I know that no...oh...my...GOD. He must be Chief Delivery On Speed Dial. Nice EI graphic. Of course, Tatanka should sell out and turn heel at the 1:40 mark. Stop talking as if Tatanka has a future!
"Never quite achieved"? I think Shawn's promo just cut itself.
Didn't they JUST form the plan? NO PANTS! NO PANTS TO SELL! Bring Back Gail Kim sign! I miss the Manhattan Center; they should've gone back for the 500th show. They totally need new graphics and the set changed when they jump to USA. Oh, he's going to bring back Matt! Well, I'm willing to suffer through a little more self-fellatio, then. Butch Fact: This RULES. Throw those V1s up like you're bulimic! Matt rules.
Val's still employed! Buff! Daddy! Buff! Daddy! Who is he, Corey Hart? "Master Of Excellence"? It...it is terrible, this idea. Blue Thunder! Venis Fly Trap--oh, right: only 4 people watch Heat. JESUS, Val! That would be the denoument, heh heh heh.
PUBLIC ENEMY'S GREATEST HITS! BOOYAH!
Oh, man, Matt Hardy & Evil Shawn on the same show. Life's good. How can I boo this man? HOW? "Battle Creek, hello!" Aw, it's the same one they threw up last time. It's still all good, though. And there you go, as predicted four paragraphs ago. They've like got to do Evil Shawn vs. Cena after the Slam, right? Battle Creek? Good night. Nice shot! (Cameraman's, I mean.) Whoever did the Chappelle Show Memorial Robot clearly should win.
From now on, I will not assume things can't get worse, although Jessica Biel should come by next week so someone outside her family sees Stealth.
The guy with the I'm Not Cool sign--greatest fan EVER. Did JR say BS? So if Carlito puts Cena in a submission hold, why doesn't Y2J just Hebner his ass? Is the GM going to overturn it or something? Carlito Driver (shrug)! Gorilla reference! So that ref's beyond fired. John's nuts have to be in his ribs after the past 7 days. Suplex on the floor! OH! CameraSHOT!
Somebody get Shelton a back brace. This goes to prove what I've always known: gamblers love the Big Show. You're right, I've got nothing. Shelton is nuts for even thinking up a throw me to the top rope into a double springboard lariat spot, yet that's why he rules. SKILLET SKILLET SKILLET SKILLET. Show mocking Snitsky was funny. Someone should let Chris know after 1947 they continued to invent moves. Cobra clutch! Big Show just breaking it up is a great allusion to his mass. ASSISTED DRAGON WHIP! One floor--maybe two?, going down.
The retarded leading the retarded. Thank god. Eugene's not from Cleveland, and Kurt's not from a casino. Tell him, Kurt. I know that no...oh...my...GOD. He must be Chief Delivery On Speed Dial. Nice EI graphic. Of course, Tatanka should sell out and turn heel at the 1:40 mark. Stop talking as if Tatanka has a future!
"Never quite achieved"? I think Shawn's promo just cut itself.
Didn't they JUST form the plan? NO PANTS! NO PANTS TO SELL! Bring Back Gail Kim sign! I miss the Manhattan Center; they should've gone back for the 500th show. They totally need new graphics and the set changed when they jump to USA. Oh, he's going to bring back Matt! Well, I'm willing to suffer through a little more self-fellatio, then. Butch Fact: This RULES. Throw those V1s up like you're bulimic! Matt rules.
Val's still employed! Buff! Daddy! Buff! Daddy! Who is he, Corey Hart? "Master Of Excellence"? It...it is terrible, this idea. Blue Thunder! Venis Fly Trap--oh, right: only 4 people watch Heat. JESUS, Val! That would be the denoument, heh heh heh.
PUBLIC ENEMY'S GREATEST HITS! BOOYAH!
Oh, man, Matt Hardy & Evil Shawn on the same show. Life's good. How can I boo this man? HOW? "Battle Creek, hello!" Aw, it's the same one they threw up last time. It's still all good, though. And there you go, as predicted four paragraphs ago. They've like got to do Evil Shawn vs. Cena after the Slam, right? Battle Creek? Good night. Nice shot! (Cameraman's, I mean.) Whoever did the Chappelle Show Memorial Robot clearly should win.
From now on, I will not assume things can't get worse, although Jessica Biel should come by next week so someone outside her family sees Stealth.
The guy with the I'm Not Cool sign--greatest fan EVER. Did JR say BS? So if Carlito puts Cena in a submission hold, why doesn't Y2J just Hebner his ass? Is the GM going to overturn it or something? Carlito Driver (shrug)! Gorilla reference! So that ref's beyond fired. John's nuts have to be in his ribs after the past 7 days. Suplex on the floor! OH! CameraSHOT!
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