ECW on Sci-Fi (8.15.06)
-We open with clips of RVD's return last week.
-Backstage, Heyman stands with Big Show. He talks about Kurt Angle's groin tear and pulls him from tonight's main event. Instead of the Triple Threat, it'll be Sabu v. RVD in a ladder match to determine who faces Show at Summerslam.
-Opening montage.
-Mick Foley comes out. He says that, despite the invitation, Ric Flair is not here tonight. But it's not because he lacks guts. Anyone willing to accept an I Quit match with the Hardcore Legend definitely has guts. He talks about the big Cell bumps that Flair says made him famous. He tells us that he didn't get up after being tossed off the Cell because he thought everyone would think less of him. He got back up because if he hadn't, he'd have thought less of himself.
What Flair doesn't understand is that Foley's career has been based on his ability to look in the mirror and like what he sees. After Summerslam, he might be bloodied and battered, but he *will* be able to look himself in the mirror the next day. He tells Flair to bring his A-Game, as he's in a war he can't possibly win. The words, "I Q-U-I-T" are simply not in Foley's vocabulary.
Since he promised something Extreme tonight, he plans to deliver. So he brings out Kelly Kelly. Then, Melina. Oy, is she ever looking hot tonight. Foley demands a Three Way Dance. And dance they do! There's a certain charm in watching K² dry hump Melina. Dry humping Foley? Not so much. Foley does bust out the Dude Love dance, so this is all worth it.
Hey, here comes Flair! He attacks Foley and gives him a pair of low blows. Foley rolls out. Flair whips him into the steps and he takes his typical ridiculous knees-first bump. Foley is bleeding from the mouth. Flair pulls off his belt and chokes Foley around the post. Refs run out to break things up. Flair grabs the mic and tells Foley that he *will* quit on Sunday night.
-Up next, CM Punk!
-Commercials
-Shannon Moore? SPOOKY! "Question authority," he tells us. Okay then!
CM Punk v. Justin Credible -
Justin gets an inset promo, where he promises to show that Punk's victory two weeks back was nothing but a fluke.
Justin slaps Punk, who fires back with kicks to the thighs. He snapmares Justin and kicks him in the spine. Cover gets two. Corner whip and Punk connects with a charging forearm smash. He lays in some boot scrapes in the corner and follows up with a Facewash! Is that the WWE debut of that move? Cover gets two. Corner whip by Punk. Justin avoids a charge, but walks into a back elbow.
Punk goes for a springboard crossbody, but lands across Justin's knee. Justin covers him for a nearfall. He locks Punk in an abdominal stretch. Punk breaks with an armdrag and goes for the KENTA Rush. Justin ducks the roundhouse kick and drives a series of knees to Punk's gut. Spinning DDT gets two.
He goes for a suplex, but Punk slips away and shoves him into the corner. Running knee strike connects, followed by a wicked roundhouse kick. Punk plants Justin with the Uranage and quickly locks him in the Anaconda Vice. Justin taps out and Punk is 2-0 in ECW!
This was just a tad below his debut, but still a really good match for what it was. Punk didn't look quite as crisp, but no big deal there. For what it's worth, I'm not a Justin Credible fan at all, but he's looked as good as he ever has in his role of ECW job guy.
-RVD video package and promo. He says that nothing will stop him from regaining the ECW Title, no matter how homicidal, suicidal or genocidal it might be.
-Commercials
-Renee Dupree poses for a photo shoot. His tights are WAAAAY too tiny. Crikey. He tells us that he's not only the most beautiful man in Sports Entertainment, but he'll prove to be the most hardcore as well. This can't be going anywhere good.
FBI v. Test & Mike Knox (w/K²) -
Hey! I mentioned Mamaluke in my recap last week and here he is on my television. Cool beans! Knox shoves Guido into the corner. Guido ducks a cheapshot on the break and starts kicking away at him. He comes off the second rope, but gets caught. Knox swings a bearhug into a backbreaker and tags Test. He gives Guido a pair of backbreakers, then follows with a sideslam. He covers, but Mamaluke makes the save.
Test moves toward Mamaluke, but he drops to the floor. He charges Guido instead, but runs into a back elbow. Guido makes the tag. Mamaluke nails Knox on the apron, but Test launches him into orbit with a flapjack. Guido comes in, but eats a wicked big boot. Test spikes Mamaluke with the TKO and this one is over.
Postmatch, Tommy Dreamer and Sandman run out. Knox and Test quickly get out of Dodge.
-The main event is next! It's either going to be a really long TV match, or they're a bunch of lying bastids. I know where my money is going.
-Commercials
-Sabu video package and promo. He tells us that he's willing to sacrifice *anything* to win tonight and go on to Summerslam.
-Heyman talks to Big Show and his riot squad, telling them that no matter who wins tonight, there's going to be a problem that needs to be solved. Kurt Angle runs up and attacks the riot squad. He whales on Show as Heyman screams for help. A bunch of cops run in and cuff Angle. Show taunts him and takes a headbutt for his troubles. He then wants to press charges for assault...
-Van Dam is out. Of pot. Yeah, I've got nothing.
-Commercials
Rob Van Dam v. Sabu - #1 Contender's Ladder Match -
They do a bit of counter wrestling at the start. RVD sends Sabu into the corner. They both go for springboard leg lariats, colliding in midair. Legdrop by RVD. He goes for a whip, but Sabu reverses him into the corner. He charges, but Van Dam nails him with a back elbow. He heads up top, but Sabu cuts him off. He vaults off of a chair and goes for a 'rana, but RVD crotches him.
Van Dam dives off the top, trying to reach the contract, but no dice. He staggers back to his feet. Sabu again dives off the chair, this time clotheslining RVD over the top. Somersault plancha connects. Back in the ring, Sabu reverses RVD into the corner and spikes him with a springboard Tornado DDT on the rebound.
Sabu rolls out and grabs the ladder. RVD catches him with a baseball slide dropkick, though. Sabu struggles to his feet and lifts the ladder. Van Dam dives over the top and Sabu ends up trapped under the ladder! That'll leave a mark! Not that you could really tell on Sabu, I guess.
-Commercials
Van Dam drops Sabu across the barricade and hits his corkscrew legdrop off of the apron. In the ring, he grabs the ladder. Sabu dropkicks him in the ankle and he bumps facefirst into it. Arabian Facebuster connects, driving RVD totally perpendicular to the ladder and making him look all bendy and hurty and whatnot. He rolls Van Dam onto the ladder and locks him in the Camel Clutch.
Sabu sets up the ladder and climbs for the contract. RVD tips the ladder, but Sabu lands on his feet and immediately stomps Van Dam down. He tries to use the ladder as the base for a Triple Jump moonsault, but crashes and burns. How could he have possible thought that that was a *good* idea? I knew as soon as he set it up that nothing good was about to come of it. RVD pops up and hits a corkscrew legdrop.
He props the ladder in the corner. Sabu jumps him, trying to whip him into the ladder. Van Dam reverses. He goes for his tumbling monkey flip, but there's no one home. Not to be deterred, Van Dam monkey flips the ladder, nailing Sabu! He also nearly cracks his own skull in the process, but yeah...that's ECW. He rolls Sabu onto the ladder, but misses Rolling Thunder. Triple Jump moonsault connects!
Sabu lays RVD on the ladder. He goes for the Atomic Arabian Facebuster, but no one's home. Sabu's facials here are awesome. Van Dam climbs towards the contract, but Sabu yanks him off the ladder and he falls facefirst to the mat. Sabu picks up the ladder and tosses it into Van Dam. He charges, but RVD gets a boot up. Five Star Frogsplash connects! Sabu rolls to the floor.
Van Dam sets up the ladder and starts climbing. But here comes Big Show to fuck up yet another week of ECW television. Van Dam dives onto him, but gets caught and deposited through a ringside table. Show wants the contract lowered and it is. Sabu comes off the top, looking for a 'rana. Show catches him. He staggers backwards and Sabu manages to grab the contract before being powerbombed!
Postmatch, SHOW SMASH! Chokeslam to Sabu. Chokeslam to RVD. He leaves being all angry and stuff. Show closes with Sabu apparently doing his beat to *eat* the contract. Oh, that wacky Sabu!
I've been saying lately that I'm not really a fan of the flippy stuff too much at this point. While that is the case, maybe it's more a case of flippy stuff from completely bland, generic guys who have no persona other than being a flippy guy. Because this match was awesome and it was certainly nothing more than a spotty mess.
Anyway, I really enjoyed this week's show. I could have done without all the talking at the start, but such is the need to hype one of the biggest PPVs of the year. Mick Foley on my TV is never really a bad thing, really, so I can't complain too much. I think they're starting to hit a bit of a groove on who they want to feature and how.
Even guys like Knox aren't bugging me too much because they're doing what Heyman always did best: Hiding his flaws and making him look like a killing machine. He hit a few big spots in the tag match, but spent most of it standing on the apron. All the better for my sanity...
-Backstage, Heyman stands with Big Show. He talks about Kurt Angle's groin tear and pulls him from tonight's main event. Instead of the Triple Threat, it'll be Sabu v. RVD in a ladder match to determine who faces Show at Summerslam.
-Opening montage.
-Mick Foley comes out. He says that, despite the invitation, Ric Flair is not here tonight. But it's not because he lacks guts. Anyone willing to accept an I Quit match with the Hardcore Legend definitely has guts. He talks about the big Cell bumps that Flair says made him famous. He tells us that he didn't get up after being tossed off the Cell because he thought everyone would think less of him. He got back up because if he hadn't, he'd have thought less of himself.
What Flair doesn't understand is that Foley's career has been based on his ability to look in the mirror and like what he sees. After Summerslam, he might be bloodied and battered, but he *will* be able to look himself in the mirror the next day. He tells Flair to bring his A-Game, as he's in a war he can't possibly win. The words, "I Q-U-I-T" are simply not in Foley's vocabulary.
Since he promised something Extreme tonight, he plans to deliver. So he brings out Kelly Kelly. Then, Melina. Oy, is she ever looking hot tonight. Foley demands a Three Way Dance. And dance they do! There's a certain charm in watching K² dry hump Melina. Dry humping Foley? Not so much. Foley does bust out the Dude Love dance, so this is all worth it.
Hey, here comes Flair! He attacks Foley and gives him a pair of low blows. Foley rolls out. Flair whips him into the steps and he takes his typical ridiculous knees-first bump. Foley is bleeding from the mouth. Flair pulls off his belt and chokes Foley around the post. Refs run out to break things up. Flair grabs the mic and tells Foley that he *will* quit on Sunday night.
-Up next, CM Punk!
-Commercials
-Shannon Moore? SPOOKY! "Question authority," he tells us. Okay then!
CM Punk v. Justin Credible -
Justin gets an inset promo, where he promises to show that Punk's victory two weeks back was nothing but a fluke.
Justin slaps Punk, who fires back with kicks to the thighs. He snapmares Justin and kicks him in the spine. Cover gets two. Corner whip and Punk connects with a charging forearm smash. He lays in some boot scrapes in the corner and follows up with a Facewash! Is that the WWE debut of that move? Cover gets two. Corner whip by Punk. Justin avoids a charge, but walks into a back elbow.
Punk goes for a springboard crossbody, but lands across Justin's knee. Justin covers him for a nearfall. He locks Punk in an abdominal stretch. Punk breaks with an armdrag and goes for the KENTA Rush. Justin ducks the roundhouse kick and drives a series of knees to Punk's gut. Spinning DDT gets two.
He goes for a suplex, but Punk slips away and shoves him into the corner. Running knee strike connects, followed by a wicked roundhouse kick. Punk plants Justin with the Uranage and quickly locks him in the Anaconda Vice. Justin taps out and Punk is 2-0 in ECW!
This was just a tad below his debut, but still a really good match for what it was. Punk didn't look quite as crisp, but no big deal there. For what it's worth, I'm not a Justin Credible fan at all, but he's looked as good as he ever has in his role of ECW job guy.
-RVD video package and promo. He says that nothing will stop him from regaining the ECW Title, no matter how homicidal, suicidal or genocidal it might be.
-Commercials
-Renee Dupree poses for a photo shoot. His tights are WAAAAY too tiny. Crikey. He tells us that he's not only the most beautiful man in Sports Entertainment, but he'll prove to be the most hardcore as well. This can't be going anywhere good.
FBI v. Test & Mike Knox (w/K²) -
Hey! I mentioned Mamaluke in my recap last week and here he is on my television. Cool beans! Knox shoves Guido into the corner. Guido ducks a cheapshot on the break and starts kicking away at him. He comes off the second rope, but gets caught. Knox swings a bearhug into a backbreaker and tags Test. He gives Guido a pair of backbreakers, then follows with a sideslam. He covers, but Mamaluke makes the save.
Test moves toward Mamaluke, but he drops to the floor. He charges Guido instead, but runs into a back elbow. Guido makes the tag. Mamaluke nails Knox on the apron, but Test launches him into orbit with a flapjack. Guido comes in, but eats a wicked big boot. Test spikes Mamaluke with the TKO and this one is over.
Postmatch, Tommy Dreamer and Sandman run out. Knox and Test quickly get out of Dodge.
-The main event is next! It's either going to be a really long TV match, or they're a bunch of lying bastids. I know where my money is going.
-Commercials
-Sabu video package and promo. He tells us that he's willing to sacrifice *anything* to win tonight and go on to Summerslam.
-Heyman talks to Big Show and his riot squad, telling them that no matter who wins tonight, there's going to be a problem that needs to be solved. Kurt Angle runs up and attacks the riot squad. He whales on Show as Heyman screams for help. A bunch of cops run in and cuff Angle. Show taunts him and takes a headbutt for his troubles. He then wants to press charges for assault...
-Van Dam is out. Of pot. Yeah, I've got nothing.
-Commercials
Rob Van Dam v. Sabu - #1 Contender's Ladder Match -
They do a bit of counter wrestling at the start. RVD sends Sabu into the corner. They both go for springboard leg lariats, colliding in midair. Legdrop by RVD. He goes for a whip, but Sabu reverses him into the corner. He charges, but Van Dam nails him with a back elbow. He heads up top, but Sabu cuts him off. He vaults off of a chair and goes for a 'rana, but RVD crotches him.
Van Dam dives off the top, trying to reach the contract, but no dice. He staggers back to his feet. Sabu again dives off the chair, this time clotheslining RVD over the top. Somersault plancha connects. Back in the ring, Sabu reverses RVD into the corner and spikes him with a springboard Tornado DDT on the rebound.
Sabu rolls out and grabs the ladder. RVD catches him with a baseball slide dropkick, though. Sabu struggles to his feet and lifts the ladder. Van Dam dives over the top and Sabu ends up trapped under the ladder! That'll leave a mark! Not that you could really tell on Sabu, I guess.
-Commercials
Van Dam drops Sabu across the barricade and hits his corkscrew legdrop off of the apron. In the ring, he grabs the ladder. Sabu dropkicks him in the ankle and he bumps facefirst into it. Arabian Facebuster connects, driving RVD totally perpendicular to the ladder and making him look all bendy and hurty and whatnot. He rolls Van Dam onto the ladder and locks him in the Camel Clutch.
Sabu sets up the ladder and climbs for the contract. RVD tips the ladder, but Sabu lands on his feet and immediately stomps Van Dam down. He tries to use the ladder as the base for a Triple Jump moonsault, but crashes and burns. How could he have possible thought that that was a *good* idea? I knew as soon as he set it up that nothing good was about to come of it. RVD pops up and hits a corkscrew legdrop.
He props the ladder in the corner. Sabu jumps him, trying to whip him into the ladder. Van Dam reverses. He goes for his tumbling monkey flip, but there's no one home. Not to be deterred, Van Dam monkey flips the ladder, nailing Sabu! He also nearly cracks his own skull in the process, but yeah...that's ECW. He rolls Sabu onto the ladder, but misses Rolling Thunder. Triple Jump moonsault connects!
Sabu lays RVD on the ladder. He goes for the Atomic Arabian Facebuster, but no one's home. Sabu's facials here are awesome. Van Dam climbs towards the contract, but Sabu yanks him off the ladder and he falls facefirst to the mat. Sabu picks up the ladder and tosses it into Van Dam. He charges, but RVD gets a boot up. Five Star Frogsplash connects! Sabu rolls to the floor.
Van Dam sets up the ladder and starts climbing. But here comes Big Show to fuck up yet another week of ECW television. Van Dam dives onto him, but gets caught and deposited through a ringside table. Show wants the contract lowered and it is. Sabu comes off the top, looking for a 'rana. Show catches him. He staggers backwards and Sabu manages to grab the contract before being powerbombed!
Postmatch, SHOW SMASH! Chokeslam to Sabu. Chokeslam to RVD. He leaves being all angry and stuff. Show closes with Sabu apparently doing his beat to *eat* the contract. Oh, that wacky Sabu!
I've been saying lately that I'm not really a fan of the flippy stuff too much at this point. While that is the case, maybe it's more a case of flippy stuff from completely bland, generic guys who have no persona other than being a flippy guy. Because this match was awesome and it was certainly nothing more than a spotty mess.
Anyway, I really enjoyed this week's show. I could have done without all the talking at the start, but such is the need to hype one of the biggest PPVs of the year. Mick Foley on my TV is never really a bad thing, really, so I can't complain too much. I think they're starting to hit a bit of a groove on who they want to feature and how.
Even guys like Knox aren't bugging me too much because they're doing what Heyman always did best: Hiding his flaws and making him look like a killing machine. He hit a few big spots in the tag match, but spent most of it standing on the apron. All the better for my sanity...
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