ECW on Sci-Fi (8.8.06)
-Show opens with clips from last week's Extreme tag. Does Mike Knox have some sort of clause in his contract that specifies that he opens the show every friggin' week?
-Opening montage. Lots of shots of CM Punk have been added.
-Later tonight, Kurt Angle faces off with Sabu to determine a number one contender. Coolness.
Mike Knox (w/Kelly²) v. Tommy Dreamer -
Dreamer is bandaged up after taking the barbed wire bumps last week. Knox attacks him as he climbs into the ring. He sends Dreamer into the ropes and ducks his head. Dreamer hits a swinging neckbreaker, then takes him over the top with a Cactus clothesline! Dreamer whips Knox into the steps and rolls in. Knox climbs onto the apron. Dreamer moves in and takes a shoulder to the gut.
Knox tries for a second, but eats a kneelift. Dreamer hangs him up in the ropes and comes off the second rope with a guillotine elbowdrop. Signal for the DDT. Heyman is out to distract the ref. Dreamer hits the DDT. The riot squad yank him out and beat him down. They roll him in and Knox hits his swinging Flatliner for the win
Postmatch, Heyman and crew corner Dreamer. Heyman asks if Dreamer can feel his pain. I do believe I've heard that somewhere before. Nah. Sandman is out to make the save. Or his music is, at any rate. Sandman himself doesn't seem to be in any hurry.
-Commercials
Back from break, Sandman stands between Dreamer and Heyman's troops. Heyman has the mic. He calls Dreamer his disciple and says that he loves him like a son. He wants to book a return match from last week, but damn...Dreamer is in no shape for it. So Sandman will have a handicap match instead. Starting now! No Extreme rules, though, meaning the cane is illegal.
Sandman v. Mike Knox & Test (w/Kelly²) -
We cut to the referees, who are dragging Dreamer to the back. Test walks by and nails Dreamer with the big boot. Knox ducks a cane shot and Test clotheslines Sandman. Cue the heel beatdown. Sandman comes back with a dropkick to Knox. He pounds on Test, but Knox quickly breaks it up. He slams Sandman. Test misses the elbow off the top. Sandman gets the cane and whales on both, causing a DQ. The heels quickly retreat...
-Sabu video package and promo. If he beats Angle tonight, he gets exactly what he wants.
-Commercials
-Balls Mahoney promo. Didn't think I'd ever see a Cradle of Filth T-shirt on WWE TV for some reason. Anyway, he likes delivering punishment, as it allows him to remain handsome. Or not.
Kevin Thorn (w/Ariel) v. Al Snow -
No Head for Al. No "e" at the end of Thorn. Lots of hot sluttiness for Ariel. A winner is her. She tries to distract Snow, but he cuts off the sneak attack from Thorn. He takes Thorn down and picks up a quick one count. And that's about it for him tonight. Thorn whips him into the corner and follows with a clothesline. He hits an, err...over the shoulder sitout gutbuster sorta deal, I guess. He spears Snow, then slams him.
Thorn canoodles with Ariel. Snow tries to come back, but is quickly cut off. Thorn plants him with the Tower of London. Really, they either need to have him use that as a finish or have him drop it completely. It's just way too devastating looking to use as a setup. At any rate, Thorn hits his Crucifix powerbomb and gets the win.
-Kurt Angle video package and promo. For Sabu, the only thing that's "suicidal" is stepping into the ring with a wrestling machine.
-Commercials
-Coming soon to ECW: Renee Dupree. Christ. There's a sentence I never thought I'd type. So there's one member of La Résistance on every brand now. The invasion is ready to begin!
-Big Show is out, wearing a suit. He's trying to bring class to ECW. Good luck with that, brutha. He's all, "Show SMASH!" and I'm all like *yawn* and then I hit fast forward.
-Commercials
-Clips of Punk's debut last week.
-Punk promo. He quotes Voltaire ("The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us") and I feel particularly geeky because I could attribute the quote on the spot. He actually got it wrong (he had the word "is" in the wrong spot, for the record. It's correct as I posted it), but who's keeping track?
Enough about me being a stupid nerd, though. He wrestles again next week. Huzzah! Give us Punk v. Guido or Mamaluke. I could do without Punk versus Doring or Roadkill, though. Don't taunt me with shit like that, you heartless WWE fucks.
Kurt Angle v. Sabu - #1 Contender Match -
As usual, Sabu opens with a leg dive. It's just funny this time, as Angle gives him a look like he's batshit insane to even think about going to the mat. He promptly double legs Sabu and smacks him around. You might want to watch yourself there, Kurt. Too much of that shit and you'll be feeling the business end of a shank. Sabu reaches the ropes. but the ref is apparently oblivious. Takes him ages to break the hold.
Side headlock takedown by Angle. Sabu shoots him into the ropes, but gets tackled. He bounces off the ropes, but Sabu scores with a drop toehold. He grabs a front facelock, but Angle hoists him up and rams him into the corner. He whips Sabu into the corner and charges. Sabu moves and Angles goes shoulder first into the post (and hard). Angle reverses a whip. Sabu holds onto the ropes and ends up backdropping Angle over the top.
-Commercials
Back in the ring, Angle is again in control. Sabu ducks a clothesline, though, spiking Angle with a springboard tornado DDT. Cover gets two. Sabu stomps on Angle and chokes him in the corner. Angle reverses a whip and tosses Sabu with an overhead belly to belly. He pounds on Sabu for a bit and kicks him to the floor. He follows, lifting Sabu into a fireman's carry and dumping him hard to the floor.
Angle rolls him in and gets two. He locks Sabu in the RNC with a body scissors. Sabu tries to elbow free, but no dice. Angle finally pulls him up and nails him with a kneelift. Whip to the corner, but Sabu avoids a charge. He catches Angle with a springboard leg lariat, then follows with a slingshot somersault legdrop for two.
He whips Angle into the corner, but runs into a boot. Sabu reverses a whip, catching Angle with a spinning heelkick for another nearfall. Angle ducks a shortarm clothesline and plants him with a German, rolled into a Shuttle Loop Buster. He covers, but Sabu gets a foot in the ropes. Angle looks for the Olympic Slam, but it gets countered into an armdrag.
Sabu dropkicks him and hits another springboard leg lariat. Cover gets two. He goes for the Camel Clutch, but Angle counters into an anklelock. Sabu rolls through and Angle bumps to the floor. Somersault pescado by Sabu! He rolls Angle in and comes off the top with a turning splash for two. Jujigatame by Sabu. Angle rolls over and counters into the anklelock.
In comes Rob Van Dam! He totally whiffs on a Van Daminator (oops), but Angle sells it anyway. Legdrop with the chair by RVD. He does Sabu's taunt, then turns and skateboards the chair into his face. Shocking! He celebrates as we fade out, with Joey Styles telling us that we still have no number one contender.
I really enjoyed this match. It actually *was* a dream match for me and while they were trapped by the conforms of television, they still delivered a fun little match. I'd love to see this on PPV at some point. All in all, the entire show was really good this week. Maybe the best they've produced, actually. I would have liked to see Punk, but they really seem to have plans for him, so I can certainly forgive them for taking things slow. I loved the lack of a Big Show match. For him, less is definitely more.
-Opening montage. Lots of shots of CM Punk have been added.
-Later tonight, Kurt Angle faces off with Sabu to determine a number one contender. Coolness.
Mike Knox (w/Kelly²) v. Tommy Dreamer -
Dreamer is bandaged up after taking the barbed wire bumps last week. Knox attacks him as he climbs into the ring. He sends Dreamer into the ropes and ducks his head. Dreamer hits a swinging neckbreaker, then takes him over the top with a Cactus clothesline! Dreamer whips Knox into the steps and rolls in. Knox climbs onto the apron. Dreamer moves in and takes a shoulder to the gut.
Knox tries for a second, but eats a kneelift. Dreamer hangs him up in the ropes and comes off the second rope with a guillotine elbowdrop. Signal for the DDT. Heyman is out to distract the ref. Dreamer hits the DDT. The riot squad yank him out and beat him down. They roll him in and Knox hits his swinging Flatliner for the win
Postmatch, Heyman and crew corner Dreamer. Heyman asks if Dreamer can feel his pain. I do believe I've heard that somewhere before. Nah. Sandman is out to make the save. Or his music is, at any rate. Sandman himself doesn't seem to be in any hurry.
-Commercials
Back from break, Sandman stands between Dreamer and Heyman's troops. Heyman has the mic. He calls Dreamer his disciple and says that he loves him like a son. He wants to book a return match from last week, but damn...Dreamer is in no shape for it. So Sandman will have a handicap match instead. Starting now! No Extreme rules, though, meaning the cane is illegal.
Sandman v. Mike Knox & Test (w/Kelly²) -
We cut to the referees, who are dragging Dreamer to the back. Test walks by and nails Dreamer with the big boot. Knox ducks a cane shot and Test clotheslines Sandman. Cue the heel beatdown. Sandman comes back with a dropkick to Knox. He pounds on Test, but Knox quickly breaks it up. He slams Sandman. Test misses the elbow off the top. Sandman gets the cane and whales on both, causing a DQ. The heels quickly retreat...
-Sabu video package and promo. If he beats Angle tonight, he gets exactly what he wants.
-Commercials
-Balls Mahoney promo. Didn't think I'd ever see a Cradle of Filth T-shirt on WWE TV for some reason. Anyway, he likes delivering punishment, as it allows him to remain handsome. Or not.
Kevin Thorn (w/Ariel) v. Al Snow -
No Head for Al. No "e" at the end of Thorn. Lots of hot sluttiness for Ariel. A winner is her. She tries to distract Snow, but he cuts off the sneak attack from Thorn. He takes Thorn down and picks up a quick one count. And that's about it for him tonight. Thorn whips him into the corner and follows with a clothesline. He hits an, err...over the shoulder sitout gutbuster sorta deal, I guess. He spears Snow, then slams him.
Thorn canoodles with Ariel. Snow tries to come back, but is quickly cut off. Thorn plants him with the Tower of London. Really, they either need to have him use that as a finish or have him drop it completely. It's just way too devastating looking to use as a setup. At any rate, Thorn hits his Crucifix powerbomb and gets the win.
-Kurt Angle video package and promo. For Sabu, the only thing that's "suicidal" is stepping into the ring with a wrestling machine.
-Commercials
-Coming soon to ECW: Renee Dupree. Christ. There's a sentence I never thought I'd type. So there's one member of La Résistance on every brand now. The invasion is ready to begin!
-Big Show is out, wearing a suit. He's trying to bring class to ECW. Good luck with that, brutha. He's all, "Show SMASH!" and I'm all like *yawn* and then I hit fast forward.
-Commercials
-Clips of Punk's debut last week.
-Punk promo. He quotes Voltaire ("The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us") and I feel particularly geeky because I could attribute the quote on the spot. He actually got it wrong (he had the word "is" in the wrong spot, for the record. It's correct as I posted it), but who's keeping track?
Enough about me being a stupid nerd, though. He wrestles again next week. Huzzah! Give us Punk v. Guido or Mamaluke. I could do without Punk versus Doring or Roadkill, though. Don't taunt me with shit like that, you heartless WWE fucks.
Kurt Angle v. Sabu - #1 Contender Match -
As usual, Sabu opens with a leg dive. It's just funny this time, as Angle gives him a look like he's batshit insane to even think about going to the mat. He promptly double legs Sabu and smacks him around. You might want to watch yourself there, Kurt. Too much of that shit and you'll be feeling the business end of a shank. Sabu reaches the ropes. but the ref is apparently oblivious. Takes him ages to break the hold.
Side headlock takedown by Angle. Sabu shoots him into the ropes, but gets tackled. He bounces off the ropes, but Sabu scores with a drop toehold. He grabs a front facelock, but Angle hoists him up and rams him into the corner. He whips Sabu into the corner and charges. Sabu moves and Angles goes shoulder first into the post (and hard). Angle reverses a whip. Sabu holds onto the ropes and ends up backdropping Angle over the top.
-Commercials
Back in the ring, Angle is again in control. Sabu ducks a clothesline, though, spiking Angle with a springboard tornado DDT. Cover gets two. Sabu stomps on Angle and chokes him in the corner. Angle reverses a whip and tosses Sabu with an overhead belly to belly. He pounds on Sabu for a bit and kicks him to the floor. He follows, lifting Sabu into a fireman's carry and dumping him hard to the floor.
Angle rolls him in and gets two. He locks Sabu in the RNC with a body scissors. Sabu tries to elbow free, but no dice. Angle finally pulls him up and nails him with a kneelift. Whip to the corner, but Sabu avoids a charge. He catches Angle with a springboard leg lariat, then follows with a slingshot somersault legdrop for two.
He whips Angle into the corner, but runs into a boot. Sabu reverses a whip, catching Angle with a spinning heelkick for another nearfall. Angle ducks a shortarm clothesline and plants him with a German, rolled into a Shuttle Loop Buster. He covers, but Sabu gets a foot in the ropes. Angle looks for the Olympic Slam, but it gets countered into an armdrag.
Sabu dropkicks him and hits another springboard leg lariat. Cover gets two. He goes for the Camel Clutch, but Angle counters into an anklelock. Sabu rolls through and Angle bumps to the floor. Somersault pescado by Sabu! He rolls Angle in and comes off the top with a turning splash for two. Jujigatame by Sabu. Angle rolls over and counters into the anklelock.
In comes Rob Van Dam! He totally whiffs on a Van Daminator (oops), but Angle sells it anyway. Legdrop with the chair by RVD. He does Sabu's taunt, then turns and skateboards the chair into his face. Shocking! He celebrates as we fade out, with Joey Styles telling us that we still have no number one contender.
I really enjoyed this match. It actually *was* a dream match for me and while they were trapped by the conforms of television, they still delivered a fun little match. I'd love to see this on PPV at some point. All in all, the entire show was really good this week. Maybe the best they've produced, actually. I would have liked to see Punk, but they really seem to have plans for him, so I can certainly forgive them for taking things slow. I loved the lack of a Big Show match. For him, less is definitely more.
Comments